A/N: The chapter has three minor time-skips. The first is in Hermione's POV, the second in Harry's, and the third in Ron's. Parts of this chapter (Dumbledore's speech) have been taken directly from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.
P.S: This chapter is rated T for Ron's overactive imagination. *winks*
P.P.S: A delectable virtual cheesecake from Mama's Little Bakery (or a Moist Maker sandwich, if you prefer) to whoever gets the F.R.I.E.N.D.S reference in the chapter! :)
Hermione Granger had always been rather perceptive, even if she said so herself. She had had an inkling that Lils was her best female friend's daughter- the resemblance was uncanny- but there was no denying that this revelation did come as a shock.
But she thought it was a pleasant shock- she could not help that self-satisfied feeling on learning that her advice had worked. She had never fancied herself an expert when it came to romance, but it felt good to hear that Harry and Ginny would get together in the (hopefully) not-so-distant future. She'd always thought they'd make a good couple. Ha. She was right.
Ron's hoarse voice brought her out of her smug thoughts.
"L-Lils is their daughter? As in them together?"
Hermione glanced at Rose, who was looking positively faint with anxiety, constantly repeating the words 'I shouldn't have said that' in a way that rather reminded her of Hagrid.
"Er, Rose?" said Hermione. The poor girl really needed a break, she was putting a lot of pressure on herself. "Rose, it's OK, you know. Ron and I will keep it to ourselves. Right, Ron?" she said in a somewhat threatening voice as she faced her still-pale friend. Ron had gone eerily quiet after the astonished outburst a few seconds ago.
She kicked Ron under the table when he didn't answer. Ron winced slightly and nodded shakily, apparently unable to form coherent words.
"You can go to sleep, I'll handle Ron," she continued, sending a sideway glance at him.
"A-are you sure?"
Hermione nodded.
"Thank you!" Rose said, her voice grateful as she quickly scampered off from the kitchen and climbed up the winding stairs to her room, evidently relieved to leave the scene. Hermione didn't blame her.
"Ron," she said softly when Rose left. "Are you OK? "
"My best mate and my sister," said Ron in a dazed voice, as if that answered her question.
Hermione bristled. "Really, Ron, don't act like this. Don't you see that they're suited for each other? They fall in love in the future, get married, and have a daughter. Honestly, it's no big deal!"
"But it is!" said Ron loudly. "They can't!"
Hermione rolled her eyes. "You thought they'd remain single their entire lives?"
"No, bu- but- "said Ron, who looked like he was struggling with himself. "But they have a daughter!" he said in a strangled whisper.
"So?"
"Hermione," said Ron exasperatedly, as if he was explaining something simple to an obtuse person. "Babies do not come out of Flutterby bushes!"
Hermione's brow furrowed. "Of course they don't, Ron. What's your problem?"
"The-they did you-know-what!"
Hermione felt the heat rise up her face. "Ron!" she said in a scandalized voice. "That's the first thing you think of?!"
Ron's ears turned red. "I can't help it, OK? Now whenever I'll look at Harry I'll imagine him and my little sister—aargh," said Ron, screwing his eyes shut as if dispelling a mental image out of his head.
Hermione chose to ignore him. "Act mature, Ron," she said irritably.
"I'm sorry not everyone can be as calm and composed as you," he snapped. "What if it was your little sister, huh?"
"I know that I certainly wouldn't behave so childishly."
"Fine," he said, testily. "I'll try not to strangle Harry next time I see him, OK?"
"Honestly, Ron," said Hermione again, rolling her eyes. "They are from the future. I'm sure many things change then. Maybe even you are married. You may even have a child." She grinned teasingly as she said that.
Ron's ears turned pink again.
"Also," continued Hermione. "It's not like it should come as a surprise, Ron. Rose often called Lils 'Lily'. That's Harry's mum's name.
Ron gave a non-committal grunt and Hermione smiled again, amused.
"We should really go to sleep now, Ron. It's way past midnight. Good night. And act normally tomorrow!"
"'Night," groused Ron.
Ron and Hermione were behaving very strangely the next day. Harry saw them having frantic silent conversations at the breakfast table, and neither of them seemed to be meeting his eye. He did not get a chance to confront them about it until everyone had finished eating and were packing last-minute things into their trunks.
Harry managed to corner Ron on the third-floor landing as he made to climb down the stairs with his trunk.
"Ron, what's wrong?"
"Huh?" said Ron in what he probably thought was a nonchalant voice. "Nothing's wrong, mate." Even as he said this, his ears turned red and he carefully avoided Harry's gaze.
"What were you and Hermione whispering about at breakfast, then?" said Harry impatiently.
"N-noth—"
"Prefect duties," said Hermione's prompt reply. Harry hadn't even heard her coming.
Harry turned at her and scowled. He had a gut feeling they had been talking about him, not their prefect duties. He decided not to stretch the topic, though.
"Ron, Harry, Hermione!" said Mrs Weasley's voice boomed from the hall. "We're getting late! Are you done yet?"
"Coming, Mrs Weasley!"
Harry pointedly ignored a very nervous Ron and Hermione throughout the surprisingly short car ride to King's Cross Station.
"Sorry, Harry," said Ron, who sounded genuinely sorry as he exchanged a look with an equally apologetic-looking Hermione. "Hermione and I have to go to the Prefect's carriage."
Harry only grunted in reply. He doubted if his annoyance at his best friends would dissipate soon.
"It's alright," said Ginny. "Let's go find a compartment, so we can save seats for them."
Harry, Ginny, Rose and Lils dragged their trunks through the trains, glancing inside each compartment they passed to check if it was empty. Harry noticed that people were staring rather shamelessly at him, not to mention whispering to each other and rudely pointing at him. He managed to ignore them.
At the very end of the train, they found Neville standing outside the last compartment, trying to stop a struggling Trevor from escaping.
"Hi, Neville!"
"Hey, Harry, Ginny." His eyes fell on Rose and Lils, and he looked confused.
"These are Rose and Lils Weasley," said Ginny smoothly. "My distant cousins. They are joining Hogwarts this year. They were home-schooled till now."
"Oh," said Neville. "Hi. I didn't know students could join Hogwarts late."
Harry peered through the last compartment's door. It was empty except for a lone person reading some sort of magazine. There seemed to be enough room for them, and Ron and Hermione as well, when they came.
"Why don't we go and sit in this compartment?"
Neville went pink and mumbled something about not wanting to disturb anyone.
Ginny peered into the compartment too and laughed. "Come on, Neville. It's only—"
"Luna!" squealed Lils as she opened the compartment door. Apparently, she knew her too. Harry glanced at Rose, half-expecting her to admonish her cousin as she had been doing all summer, but she just looked on resignedly. Come to think of it, she had been uncharacteristically subdued since morning.
"Hello," said the girl sitting in the compartment in a serene voice as they entered the compartment, dragging their trunks behind them. "How do you know my name?" She had straggly, waist-length, dirty-blonde hair and large blue eyes which gave her a half-comical mildly surprised look. She looked very strange, Harry thought, with the radish earrings dangling from her ears and a necklace of butterbeer corks around her neck. She was also reading a magazine upside-down, and looked remarkably unperturbed for a person who had just heard a complete stranger call them by their name so enthusiastically.
"Was it the nodidgies? Did they tell you?" she continued.
Harry exchanged a bemused glance with Ginny. 'Nodidgies'?
"Yep," said Lils without missing a beat.
"That's nice. Nodidgies are very picky when it comes to telling secrets. You must be special. I don't know you, though."
"I'm Lils Weasley- Rose and I," she nodded towards Rose, "are distant cousins of Ginevra's."
"That's nice." Luna turned to Harry. "Are they related to you as well?"
"Er, no," said Harry, unnerved by her strong gaze.
"Oh. The Nargles must be getting to me."
After this pronunciation of Luna's, no one spoke for some long minutes until Neville took out his new plant, the Mimbulus Mimbletonia to ease the tension.
"And," said Neville enthusiastically five minutes later, "It has excellent reflexes. See- hold Trevor for me, Harry, will you?"
Harry complied as Neville took out his mouth and gave a well-aimed jab to the plant. Almost instantly, a smelly green liquid squirted out of it, covering almost everyone's faces.
As if Harry's day couldn't get any worse, Cho Chang, of all people chose this moment to enter the compartment.
Harry groaned when she left awkwardly, the door closing behind her. "Dammit."
"Who is she?" asked Lils over Neville's apologies as Ginny used Scourgify to clean up everyone's faces.
"Cho Chang," said Harry morosely, head buried in his hands. "Ravenclaw seeker."
"Wait, Cho Chang?" said Lils suddenly.
"Yeah, that's what I said. D'you know her?"
"Well, I've heard about her," she said, an unreadable expression on her face.
"Lils," protested Rose weakly. "This is not the time."
"Fine," huffed Lils. She proceeded to ignore everyone but Luna the entire train ride.
"Hey, I know her!" said Harry after finishing his treacle tart, pointing at a squat woman sitting beside Dumbledore at the head table. She was dressed in frilly pink robes and had a velvet bow perched atop her head. Her yellowish face rather reminded Ron of a toad. "She was at my hearing. She wanted me to get expelled."
Ron cringed slightly as Harry spoke, and he immediately felt Hermione's disapproving eyes boring into his head. He caught her eye and she gave him a look that plainly said, stop with the drama. Ron nodded grumpily. Ugh, his best mate and his sister. It would obviously take some time for him to digest that.
"She's Dolores Umbridge," Lily said rather dispassionately. "You all are going to hate her."
"Oh, Merlin, not another one," said Ginny. "Is she a Death Eater too?"
"No," said Rose, glaring at the Umbridge woman, who was speaking to an annoyed-looking McGonagall. "But she's a very incompetent and horrid teacher, not to mention sadistic."
Ron sighed. "Do we ever get a good DADA professor?"
"Our current teacher is really cool!" piped up Lily. "Professor Phalange knows her stuff! And she-"
Lily was interrupted by Dumbledore, who had gotten to his feet.
"Well, now that we are digesting another magnificent feast, I beg a few minutes of your attention for some of the usual start-of-term notices.
"Firstly, apart from our first year students, the school is welcoming two new additions to Gryffindor House- Rose and Lils Weasley, who have joined Hogwarts this year and are in their fifth and second year respectively."
The students from the other houses swivelled around to look at Rose and Lils, the latter of whom was waving cheerily.
"Also," said Dumbledore, grabbing the attention of the students once again, "Mr. Filch, the caretaker, has asked me, for what he tells me is the four-hundred-and-sixty-second time, to remind you that magic and a number of other things are not permitted in corridors between classes. The 'other things' can be checked on an extensive list now fastened to Mr. Filch's office door.
"We have had two changes in staffing this year. We are very pleased to welcome back Professor Grubbly-Plank, who will be taking Care of Magical Creatures lessons; we are also delighted to introduce Professor Umbridge, our new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher."
"Wait a minute," said Ron. "Grubbly-Plank? What about Hagrid?"
"Wasn't he supposed to go on a secret mission for Dumbledore?" whispered Hermione so that only he and Harry could hear.
"But Dumbledore didn't say how long till he comes back," said Harry anxiously.
Dumbledore continued, "Tryouts for the house Quidditch teams will take place on the—"
He broke off, looking enquiringly at Umbridge. As she was not much taller standing than sitting, there was a moment when Ron didn't understand why Dumbledore had stopped talking, but then Umbridge cleared her throat in a sickeningly honeyed voice, "Hem, hem," and it became clear that she had got to her feet and was intending to make a speech.
Ron exchanged a sceptical glance with Hermione. No new teacher had ever interrupted Dumbledore before. This woman certainly didn't know how things were done at Hogwarts.
"Thank you, Headmaster," she simpered in a ridiculously high-pitched voice, "for those kind words of welcome."
She then launched into a long-winded speech that made absolutely no sense to Ron. He caught bits and phrases like 'ancient skills unique to the wizarding world', 'progress for progress' sake', 'openness', 'outmoded' and 'tradition'.
Ron successfully managed to zone out the rest of her speech and began absently staring at Hermione, who was listening to the speech with rapt attention. Her brown hair looked really pretty…
He gave a start as the rest of the student body started applauding rather unenthusiastically. Her speech must have gotten over. Thank Morgana.
"The speech was certainly illuminating," said Hermione darkly.
"Huh?" said Lily, whose eyes were looking slightly glazed. "It sounded like a load of waffle to me."
"There was some interesting stuff hidden in the waffle," said Hermione grimly.
"What d'you mean?" asked Ron.
"Professor Umbridge heavily implied that the Ministry's interfering at Hogwarts."
Suddenly, there was a great clattering and banging all around them; Dumbledore had evidently just dismissed the school, and everyone was standing up and getting ready to leave the Hall. Hermione jumped up, her hair bouncing with her, looking flustered.
"Ron, we're supposed to show the first-years where to go!"
"Oh, yeah. Hey- hey," he said, moving towards the tiny first years. "You lot! Midgets!"
"Ron!" said Hermione in a disapproving voice, though Ron swore he could see her lips twitching slightly.
A/N: Please review!