Chapter Forty Two

Marissa woke up with a head-splitting ache. Her dizziness made it hard for her to see her angered mother. In spit of the blur, she saw her face in her mind clearly- she was pissed off to the max. Marissa could only hear mouthfuls of noise but she also assumed it wasn't pretty. On the occasion that she would hear a little word plummeting through her mind, it sent a pain-shrilling throb to her head. The noise- unbearable.

"You acted very irresponsibly Marissa Cooper," Marissa heard a fragment off, "Cell phone," Marissa squinted as she tried to see where she was in the confusion, "Grounded." She wished she heard more. She wanted to speak out but she had no idea how- it's like she forgot to move her lips. Or maybe they were just too much in pain for her to realise they were there. Marissa wobbled as she tried to get up, but her mother's steady hand pushed her back down, "I'm not done." Marissa felt nauseous, and she desperately needed to make a detour to the bathroom, so she could kneel over the toilet and let her troubles out.

"I need to," Marissa couldn't finish. Last night's fun was out on today's carpet. Julie jumped up, as it nearly caught her toe. Marissa looked at her weakly, "Sorry." She said quietly, as more vomit fled from her body.

"Marissa, you're coming home drunk much to often." Julie now sounded concerned. Marissa was now regaining her capacity to speak, hear, and even see- although the images were constantly blurry and slightly indistinguishable. Julie touched Marissa's shoulder, "You're not going to school today, honey."

"Why." Marissa said slowly, not asking, however more-so stating. She still felt sick but her stomach was gradually getting better.

"Because you're a wreck. And you have to clean the carpet." Julie said as she walked out of the bedroom. Marissa groaned as she slammed toward her bed. Maybe if her intentions had been clear the night before, she could have avoided this all. She laid down on her bed, her eyes closing without effort. She tried to remember what happened the previous night- all she could remember were the first few, clean drinks, then a few stronger ones. After that, she remembered not a sole thing.

Then it dawned on her.

It had something to with Ryan. And a good alcohol place. Why had she gone there? What had happened? Small thoughts came dashing through her mind- but she couldn't differentiate them from reality, or a dream.

Ryan didn't show at the café. Marissa was slowly starting to remember. She was at the Café Rose, was it? Yes, as she recalled it was. Today she had to go there to apologize so she would be a welcomed guest once more.

Her phone started ringing- Marissa picked it up and hollered with exhaustion into the small cellular phone.

"Coop, you okay? Words all around school. You told Ryan to take a 'break'." Summer knew how severe the words were, "So why'd you 'break' up with him? Cause we all know that's what a break is, honey. Ryan also told Seth something else. Something you probably don't need. You sound hungover." Summer said in worry.

"I am hungover, Sum. What did Ryan tell Seth? I need to know why he stood me up." Marissa asked.

"He said you were with, Kelly." Summer said in disgust, in sheer doubt.

"I was with, Kelly. It's too long of a story to explain; she came to apologize. I kicked her out of my face though, anyways. So that's why Ryan stood me up? THAT'S why I got drunk last night? Cause I was with Kelly?"

"No, Marissa. You don't get it. He thought you were 'with' Kelly." Summer said.

"Oh God. He thinks I'm like that too? Holy freaking sht! Sum! You told him it was just a speculation right? It's not real? Summer?" Marissa said frantically when Summer wasn't answering her.

"I didn't know what to say, honey. I mean, you were mad at him for whatever reasons. I thought that maybe you were trying to get back at him." Summer said quietly.

"You're just as fcked as the rest of the world." Marissa said coldly, before she hung up after the most brutal conversation she had yet with Summer- her best friend, Summer. Marissa sunk into her bed, as she started to moan, crying. She was so upset that even her friend thought of her as a… She didn't even want to say the word it scared her so much. Because she wasn't- and Marissa was sure of it. She loved Ryan, and just because of a silly mistake everyone thought that she would change. Everyone, especially Summer, should have known there was meaning behind it. Marissa wouldn't go for Alex. She was a girl. No matter how messed up the world was, Marissa refused to be buried in infinite lies; even if it meant loosing the bestest friend that existed. Having you friends deny you a voice, was unacceptable. Not only did Ryan not care for an explanation, he influenced others to believe the same. She was mad at the world- mad at everyone and everything in the world. What she didn't need right now, was her mother coming in to her room, and that unbearably stench coming from the vomit that powdered the floor.

"Marissa, get up. You have work to do, do you not?" Julie said.

"Go away." Marissa coughed, this time, making her intentions clear. She remembered- she should have done that with Alex. She should have remembered the rumours in second's time. But she didn't, and it was her horrible mistake. The mistake that cost her a boyfriend, best friend, and possibly a life.

"Marissa, you're hungover- I know – but either ways, work must be done. You can't spend your day wallowing like this. Put yourself together; get a hold of yourself, honey. Sure I'm upset with you, but not necessarily AT you. Something must have happened to have made you so miserable." Julie said reasonably.

"Yah, yah, I'm sure. You're just saying that to get me out of this god-damned bed." Marissa said coldly, replying to her mother's kindness.