Chapter Eleven

Summer and Seth sat in the hospital, trying to figure out different possibilities for their friends; Marissa and Ryan. They attempted to help them, but both, speechless, had no solutions for a monstrous mother. Seth and Summer smiled at each other, glad that they didn't have these kinds of problems. Then Seth thought for a moment, that they did have these problems; actually would.

"Summer, what about your mom? You always complained about her, but actually I intend to meet her." Seth looked at her troubled face.

"Seth, if I even knew where she was …" Summer's voice trailed off. Seth could tell she wasn't too happy about this. Well, obviously in a way. "I always said she was horrible, and everything- but that's because I don't know her at all. I don't know where she is, how she's doing. I haven't seen her for a while now. And I don't intend to either. She left me. Me and my dad, Seth. I can't ever forgive that, no matter how nice she is. So, please. Just don't mention her, because I want to forget she existed. A mother that leaves her kids, isn't really worth remembering." Summer said slowly, tears piercing in her eyes.

"Sum. I didn't mean to get you upset. I was just, you know, well, forget it." Seth said dumbly. He didn't know what else to say, of course. He had good intentions, well, kind of. But in the end, he turned out to be a loser. "So how are you feeling? No nightmares or anything?" Now that they were already in difficult moods, he might as well have continued with difficult topics.

"I'm okay, not bad at all. But that's because I know you're okay," Summer said with a smile, extending her hand to touch Seth's, "As for the nightmares. I don't think they'll ever stop." Summer shrugged, "How about you? How are you holding up?" Summer asked, sincerely.

"You know what?" Seth asked, himself. "I'm doing alright. Minimal pain, and everything. You know, Summer. If you'd have taken the bullet, I wouldn't forgive myself. I'd rather die for you, Sugar." Seth said.

"You know," Summer started, "When you were lying here in the hospital, then I was thinking the same thing. If you died, Seth, I would die too." Summer said looking Seth straight in the eyes.

"Summer. You would go on; you could have a future. You're beautiful, smart, amazing, perfect." Seth said, "Your life could continue. Other than you, who else would love me?" Seth asked.

"Seth!" Summer shrieked, "Even if I were alive, I would NEVER go with someone else. Never. I would never be happy. Ever. Not without you." Summer said.

"Sum, for the record, if I die before you, I want you to be happy. So I want you to do anything that will make you happy. Is that clear?" Seth asked sternly, hoping Summer would promise.

"No," Summer shook her head, but Seth wouldn't let her continue.

"I want you to be happy. Promise me you will do anything that will make you happy, anything, if I'm gone." Seth looked into Summer's tear-filled eyes, "I want to know that if I ever pass on, you will be happy." Summer continued to sit quietly- she even sniffled, thinking over the matter.

"Seth," Summer stopped, hoping Seth wouldn't interrupt her, "I can promise you that, but I don't think I would be able to be happy without you." Seth closed his eyes for a second.

"You can be happy. One day you will have to be happy." Seth reassured her, "We're going to be together till death do us part. But after that, we're going to have to hold up- one or the other, both happy." Seth pressed.

"Promise." Summer nodded, crying. Seth didn't want her to cry, but knowing that she could be happy given the separation meant the world to him, "I promise I'll try." Summer nodded. Seth nodded with her, too. He squeezed her hand, in his, tightly. They swam in mere silence for quite some time. Both Summer and Seth were thinking about what life would be like without each other. Summer was taking it more emotionally, but Seth was satisfied, that he meant something to her.

"Seth, you know if I died, I know a lot of girls who would line up for you. So don't say you would be alone." Summer said, raising both eyebrows, pressing her lips together, as she tried to avoid tears, "That's why I'm so protective of you. 'Cause once I've got you, then honey, I ain't letting go. No girl is gunna get her hands on you, honey." Summer said, trying to smile.

"Like who for example?" Seth asked quickly, wondering if Summer could manage to prove her point.

"Like," Summer thought for a second's time, "Anna."

Marissa, Ryan, and Sandy were eating a delicious 5-minute meal, prepared by Kirsten. Marissa and Ryan chowed down the grilled cheese sandwiches, and salad with a spicy Italian dressing. Sandy ate little by little, on his already full stomach- but he couldn't refuse food if it was being made. Kirsten smiled, and after a bit joined the three at the table with a cup of hot tea.

"Oh right, drinks? Anyone?" Kirsten asked.

"I'll have water, please." Marissa asked politely. Kirsten registered that, mumbling it under her nose quickly.

"I'll have water, too, please." Ryan asked.

"Two waters. And you, Sandy?" Kirsten asked.

"Um. How about some coke?" Sandy suggested, knowing Kirsten would never let him drink that at this time.

"Sandy," Kirsten said sternly, "It's late. Tea or water?" Kirsten asked restrictedly.

"I'll have water, in that case." Sandy glared playfully, and Kirsten only nodded. A few minutes later she came back with the cups, half-filled with crushed ice cubes. Finally, after chasing around the kitchen, Kirsten sat down, and started to much on some of the salad. Her stomach was fighting for a grilled cheese sandwich, but she knew not to eat those things at such a late hour. She stuck with the healthy salad instead.

"So kids, how was school?" Sandy asked systematically, his mouth bursting with food.

"Good." Marissa and Ryan said together. They both smiled at each other, placing a wad of food in their mouth, as though penetrating the grin. After a nice late meal, and a full stomach, Marissa and Ryan split from the table, and went for an evening stroll together. Marissa looked up at Ryan, at his stern, yet warm face, and she tried hard not to giggle. She had a tickling feeling in her stomach that made her want to laugh, apparently for no reason.

"What?" Ryan asked self-consciously, looking at Marissa deeply.

"Nothing." She couldn't help but laugh this time, as she shrugged. She laughed some more, "Can't a girl laugh?" Marissa asked carelessly. Ryan sensed that she was in a playful mood. He entwined his finger with her hair, as he toyed with it, with a slight smile on his face. He loved the feeling- so soft and silky. Ryan, didn't bother answer Marissa's question, obviously it was rhetorical enough to stop him from answering.

"What are you thinking of?" Marissa asked, lost in waves of thought that were encircling her mind. She truly, authentically, and honestly wanted to know- she was curious by it all.

"I'm thinking of how perfect you are. But you weren't supposed to know that." Ryan said carefully, "I'm thinking about how stupid I was when I said that this isn't love, because if this isn't love, I think my heart will burst if there's more coming." Ryan said, looking into Marissa's eyes, separated by the darkness, "Marissa, I think you should know, that I love you, and no matter how many times I tell you I love you, I'm afraid it's just not enough. I hope it is, Marissa Cooper; I hope that these three words are enough for you." Ryan said as empathetically as he could manage.

"Ryan," Marissa said happily, "Of course it's enough. It always will be enough. I love you, means more than you think." Marissa said, as her smile wiped from her face, "I love you, too." Marissa said slowly. Ryan cradled her in a hug, as she buried her head in his shoulder, smiling to herself. Ryan loved the feeling of having someone to hold.