Disclaimer: I do not own Evangelion or any of its characters, plots and ideas etc. etc.
A/N: thought I was gone for good did you? Some crazy bad stuff kept me from this, but it's all good for now. I have this completed in a notebook somewhere, just a matter of typing it out. May take some time as I don't have a proof reader anymore . . .
Chapter 12: old habits are hard to break
By: clear shot
Nothing is what it seems to be. Solemn times can only be brought up after you realized what you had was a good thing after all. Time to go back to routine, a place where you're comfortable.
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"You have called for me doctor?"
"The commander's doll is right on time."
"I am not his doll."
"Shut the fuck up you little bitch. You've done nothing but stand in my way."
"...I did not mean to. I do not feel the same feelings as I once had for the commander. I am sorry."
"I am too," three shots echoed in Rei's ears as she felt herself falling to the floor. She laid there for a moment and closed her eyes.
When Rei opened her eyes she was lying in her bed holding where she imagined the bullets to have hit. It was all a dream. She didn't like the fact that every dream she had ever had was a dream of pain and her death. She looked over to Shinji's bed hoping to ask him about her dream, only to remember that he had left. He had left her alone again.
Rei didn't even know if Misato and Asuka had known that he left. She really didn't care. She just wanted him back. What time is it? she fell asleep fifteen minutes after Shinji had left, and slept for half an hour.
It appeared to her that no one had stepped foot in her room after she fell asleep. So indeed no one knew he was gone. Rei could do nothing but go back in the shell that she had been living in, before she met Shinji. Yet she still wanted to pass the time, without sleeping though. Sleep was not worth the pain it brought.
"Hey Toji, what Misato talk with you about?"
"Ah nothing, she's just worried about Shinji."
"C'mon Toji don't lie to me. I bet she told you NERV's secrets and you're not allowed to tell me."
"Yeah, yeah."
"I'll just use my own sources to get the information I want then. I don't need yours or Shinji's help. Hey, Shinji hasn't come out of his room since he had the little tiff with Asuka."
"Yeah right, little tiff."
"Let's go and cheer him up. Unless Ayanami is doing his cheering up."
"heh, ok fine, lets get em out of here."
Toji took a last look at the balcony. His life would change very abruptly soon. Until then, he wanted to live like a normal kid, if only for a little while longer.
Kensuke and Toji got to Shinji and Rei's room and stood there for a moment, now feeling nervous with their decision. They didn't know Rei as well as they liked to. Who knows how she would take their interruption.
Kensuke tapped gently on the door. "Shinji? Ayanami? Are you two decent in there." with not even a movement inside the room Kensuke could do nothing but look at Toji. "Think we should just open the door Toj?"
"The hell would I know?"
Kensuke pushed the door open. Nothing could be seen because it was dark in the room. "Shinji? Ayanami? They came in here didn't they Toj?"
"Let's find the light."
Kensuke felt up the side of the wall looking for a light switch. When he finally found it they saw that Rei was just lying in her bed facing away from them. They both knew that something was wrong.
"Sorry about barging in like that, Ayanami. We were looking for uh...Shinji... yeah, we were looking for Shinji."
Rei sat up and stared past them for a moment. Like they weren't even there. That just proved both their thoughts right. Something was definitely wrong. Rei was acting like her old self again. Something they hadn't seen since before Shinji came to Tokyo-3. Now they couldn't help but wonder where Shinji was.
"Ayanami?"
Rei ignored them. She wanted comfort again. But without Shinji to even talk to, she didn't know what to do. She sat there wishing someone would tell her what to do, someone to order her not to have a hollow feeling inside. She knew even though she wouldn't be able to follow that order, she would find comfort in trying to strive toward it. She couldn't do it by herself.
"No more orders." Rei whispered.
Rei put on a pair of her socks and walked out of the room, leaving a confused Toji and Kensuke looking at each other. Rei never even looked back or told them to leave. They had to tell someone about Rei. The thought struck them at the same time. "We gotta tell Misato what's up."
"Hey ken... you think we should follow her?"
"I don't think that's a good idea. Maybe she wants to be alone. Or maybe she went to go look for Shinji, they probably had a fight or something."
"Some fight. So what should we do then? Just tell Misato? Or are we jumping the gun here?"
"I guess its better safe than sorry. Who knows if she'll hurt herself? We all know what Shinji did to himself, and Rei is in the same predicament. Let's hope that she has a more constructive way of relieving her stress until we let Misato know."
He left because his feelings for me were unclear. He did not think that I would be able to understand. I do not think I would have understood him if he had told me what was going troubling him. He has chosen solitude over me. I believe that it is best. Or is it that knowing of some of my origin, he cannot trust me as he says he can. I do not know if there is a was for me to know his true feelings.
Rei stood at the edge looking down. She let herself fall what seemed like an eternity, but at the last moment moved in the air to dive perfectly in the school pool.
Perhaps I shall just ask him to answer me honestly.
Rei felt at ease when she was swimming. The water was so much more comforting than the LCL she had spent a lot of time in testing. It was the one place that Gendo let her go by herself when she was young. He would leave and she would swim until he got back. In there she couldn't hear anyone but herself. That was the only place she worries about herself alone. Now however, she had to think about everything that she was starting to remember that she hadn't before. Her memories would help save lives according to Misato. She had to focus.
NERV+
Gendo pressed a call button on his desk. I man answered him.
"Yes sir?"
"I would like for you to bring in the first child. I have some questions I need to ask her."
"Right away sir."
"Do not harm her. She will obey if you say the order is from me."
"Yes sir."
Gendo sat down behind his desk with a slight smile on his face. He knew that Rei had memories returning, he just needed to know if it would at all threaten the scenario. It was time to tighten his grip on her. But this time he would use cleverer means in doing so.
Katsuragi's residence+
Misato was still standing on the balcony, just thinking about everything. She rubbed the small cross hanging around her neck every now and then. She knew why she joined NERV. But she didn't think that it would have such an awful toll on her life.
Tappings on glass made her turn her head to investigate. Kensuke had a grin and said threw the glass that he and Toji had something to tell her. She gave an exhausted smile and slid open the door. "What's up you two?"
"Well I don't know if this is as serious as we think it is, but we can't find Shinji, and when we asked Rei about it, she ignored us. I know it fits their personalities, but they're acting like there old selves, and we don't think that's such a good thing."
"Yeah. Maybe we're just jumpy cause of what happened to Shinji. But we're worried about them," Toji threw in after Kensuke's explanation.
"Oh you two. Don't worry about them. That's just in their nature. Old habits are hard to break." Misato said giving a fake uneasy laugh at the end. "Why don't you two just head on home. I'll tell Shinji to give you a call when he gets home."
"Yeah that's probably best," Toji said. "I'll go get Hikari."
Toji went to Asuka's room and Kensuke made his way to the door to get his shoes on. Misato's little front she put up about not being concerned was working to buy her some time. Plus she liked to panic in front of as few people as possible. She was on the verge of pulling her hair out worrying about those two.
After saying goodbye to Toji, Hikari, and Kensuke, Misato sat on the couch to gather her thoughts. Should she call NERV and say that she didn't know where the kids were. She immediately said no to that one, at least for now. She could try and get a hold of Kaji and Ritsuko so they could keep their eyes out for them. Ok that's a start. Then I'll get Asuka and we'll drive around for them.
"Misato! Where is that baka and wondergirl?"
"Umm I'm not sure right now. I was just about to make a few calls to see where they could be." Misato said trying to hide how nervous she was
"Just forget about them, they'll be back depressed in their room by the end of the night. Besides, this place was getting crowded anyway." Asuka grabbed a towel and headed to take a shower.
I'll just leave her here I guess, someone will have to answer the phone if one of them calls.
Misato opened up her cell phone and called Kaji first. All she got was his answering machine, which she knew she would. She didn't leave a message because she knew she would sound to aggravated. Kaji wouldn't let her hear the end of that if nothing was the matter, she thought.
Misato knew that Ritsuko would answer her phone at NERV. She was always there at odd hours. From what Rei said she still didn't know if she could trust her with the kids anymore. But she had to take a chance this time. Shinji and Rei might get hurt, and she couldn't have that on her conscience.
Only one ring and Ritsuko answered her phone.
"Hello, Akagi speaking"
"Hi Ritsuko, I have a little problem here."
"And what's new Misato."
"Well...I don't know where Shinji and Rei are, and I don't even think there together. I think she went looking for Shinji. But doesn't section 2 know where they're at?"
"You better pray they do Misato. That's a real bad move on your part; the commander's going to chew you out if something happens to them."
"I know, just get a hold of section 2 and ask please. I'm gonna drive around a bit and look, Asuka will be here to take calls or see if they come back." Misato was walking around the house looking for some signs of here they could have gone when she decided to go into Shinji and Rei's room. When she saw that most of Shinji's things were gone, she sighed sadly. "I have to go Ritsuko, call me when you get word from section 2."
So he ran away? And it Looks like Rei intends to find him. I don't blame him for running, but I know that won't make him happy. I just hope Rei doesn't get hurt if he doesn't come back. With that final thought Misato shouted threw the bathroom door, "hey Asuka if anyone calls about Shinji or Rei call me on my cell." After hearing a grumbled agreement she bolted out the door.
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Asuka honestly didn't know much about Shinji and Rei but she already had resentment for both of them. The way they needed each other, they way they thought that they were better than her. Almost everything about them made Asuka want to hate them more. Asuka would never admit she wanted them as friends or even acquaintances, cause she didn't know what it was like to have a people to call her friends.
Both Rei and Shinji were so much like Asuka that she hated it. She hated herself even though that was the only person she gave praise to. With them gone she was hoping that more attention would be on her for a time being but she knew that it wouldn't. Everyone would be looking for them and worrying about them.
They're probably just doing this for attention. That figures, they can't get it any other way can they. They're so pathetic. Running away together, what a fairytale. Asuka didn't know that Rei went to look for Shinji and that both were on the verge of nervous breakdown. Even if she did she wouldn't think different.
She finished with her shower, dried off, and got dressed. She was going to listen to Misato and wait for the calls, but she told herself she would only so she could know what to yell to them about.
While she was waiting she thought about that girl Hikari. She seemed like a nice person, and the only normal person at school. Asuka found someone she could hang out with and hopefully have her back hen she tormented people. To bad she suck good friends with the stooges and wonder girl. now Asuka had and excuse to get to know Rei and Shinji more. If she hung out with Hikari she would run into Shinji and Rei more often, hoping to get something on them.
She couldn't wait till someone found them.
Misato had been driving around town for nearly two hours by now. She was very worried because Ritsuko hadn't called her back. That could only mean that it wasn't good news. Ritsuko probably went right into action when the problem came up.
By now the sun was beginning to set. Misato knew that she couldn't go looking in the dark so she thought she would check the school. She was running out of ideas. As she pulled up she saw two cars parked in the parking lot. She recognized them as section 2's cars.
She couldn't keep her curiosity contained; she had to see why they were there. She quietly exited her car and ran in the building. Since the cars were parked closest to the gym she would start there. As she opened the door to look down the corridor she saw a section two agent walk in the swimming room of the gym. Quietly stalking them she got into a position where she would have a view and still be out of sight.
Rei had been doing laps in the pool for hours and she didn't even know it. Time wasn't important to her. She had taken this time to think about everything. Everything from her purpose in life, to why people acted the way they did. She did not make much progress though. She was very confused and very vulnerable, almost enough to be afraid.
Rei saw that it was now getting dark, so she thought it would be best to go home and wait. Climbing out of the pool she saw four men coming towards her. The man in the lead said to her, "you are required at NERV." Rei stared at the man defiantly, and then began to walk past them.
One of the men made to grab Rei from her shoulder, but was restrained by the leader. "It is a direct order from the commander, miss Ayanami." That stopped Rei dead in her tracks. She didn't know what to do, but she knew that they would not give her time to think about it.
"I shall change then be right back." The agents nodded and she proceeded to the locker rooms. At least this way she could buy enough time to think about what she could say, and what she should reveal to him, if anything.
By Misato had seen everything. She knew she couldn't get in their way. There was no point in staying any longer, NERV had Rei, and Misato knew that they were going to ask her many questions about Shinji. She could only assume that Ritsuko had a hand in this. She was angry with herself for telling Ritsuko now. She didn't need anyone's help, she could have found Rei on her own and spared her of section 2.
All Misato could do now, was feel disappointment in her decision. Now she knew she had to get to the bottom of where Ritsuko's loyalties lied. She could not afford another mistake when it came to trusting her.
The night was colder than Shinji thought it would be. He still hadn't had time to recover from his mishap in unit-01. The whole time he was gone he had been walking, with no particular destination. He just needed some air, and time.
The main thought on his mind was what Rei had told him. How could she be a clone, and of who? He would never go as far as call her not human, but she obviously wasn't normal. This was intriguing to him, yet it also scared him more than he thought possible.
For a while he couldn't remember why he was running, but the fact is, he was. No matter how many times he told himself not to run, he still couldn't resist this time. He used the excuse that the presence in unit-01 had told him to leave, but now he was thinking that it was all a test. Perhaps he should have stayed and tried to help, himself and Rei.
Thoughts of suicide began filling his mind again, but now he knew how much it would hurt Rei. Then again, he thought that he was a burden that would be better of lifted from her. Like pulling a Band-Aid off, it hurts but it has to be done. But what if he was the only thing keeping Rei bound to her sanity. Could he do such a selfish act again? He already swore he wouldn't but there would always be that temptation, just another way of running.
If he ever got the nerve to go back and face Rei he would first and foremost ask for her forgiveness. Until then he would keep walking, and hoping something would come to him like a revelation. But he was still running away.
Off in the distance Shinji saw a person standing out in the open, looking towards the city. He thought about avoiding the person and walking the other way, but the only other way was back, and he wasn't ready for that yet. So Shinji proceeded forward hoping that he would just be ignored like all the other times in his life.
Every step that brought him closer made him tense. The last thing he wanted was to have to talk to someone he didn't even know.
As the person came into view he saw that it was a man. On closer inspection he saw it was Kaji. He didn't expect to see him there, of all places.
"Hey Shinji, what are you doing here?"
Rei came up with a position on how she would talk to Gendo. She would avoid his questions as best she could, but try not to lie. She still wasn't sure if she could lie to the commander's face. He has always had a control on her that she couldn't explain.
Rei informed the guards that she was ready, and was escorted to NERV, hoping that she would not anger the commander. He would only punish her and when Shinji was found, he would certainly not feel welcomed from the commander.
Shinji walked closer looking as if he couldn't believe his eyes. "Mr. Kaji? Umm...I just wanted...I just need to get out on my own...for a while." Shinji only took a glance at Kaji and said most of this looking at the ground. Shinji was feeling ashamed for doing something that was solely for himself. He thought Kaji would look down on him for thinking he need to help himself and neglect the others.
"I know what you mean Shinji. Sometimes I come out her just to be alone. Work gets hard, and we all need a break some times."
"Really? I mean... how can spending time by your-self really help anyone."
"Think of it this way Shinji, who understands you more than you."
Kaji's words were having a great effect on Shinji. Shinji couldn't say then, but he was glad that he ran into someone. He kept telling himself that he wanted to be alone, but company had its up sides as well.
"But Mr. Kaji. I can't help anyone if I'm out here by myself. I can't even start up unit 01. I can't protect anyone when I just keep running away." Now Shinji seemed like he was talking to himself. Trying to convince himself of something. Kaji knew what Shinji was going threw.
"Listen Shinji. Sometimes you have to just stop worrying about others, and help yourself first. There's no way in hell you can save anyone if you can't even help yourself. The problem is that you don't want to help yourself. How about thinking this way then...if you really want to help everyone, the only way that it's possible is to come to terms with yourself, and your problems."
"How? When can I go back and face everyone again."
"When you're ready, you won't have a doubt whether to go back or not. You'll probably even look forward to it."
"I don't know"
"Ok, then why did you leave in the first place?"
"Because..." Shinji knew why he left but he didn't believe it. He left because there was so much change. So much suffering that wasn't just his alone. He left because he was scared. Not because a voice inside his head said it would be best, that was his lie to himself.
Kaji saw the boy's inner turmoil; he knew he couldn't help him. He could only hope. "See ya around Shinji."
Shinji didn't even realize that Kaji had left; he didn't even hear him anymore. Shinji walked over a hill in the distance and found a bench to sit on. He didn't even think about it, his body willed itself to find somewhere to sit.
He didn't know whether to cry or laugh now. He could simple just go back and ask for forgiveness... or not.
Rei was escorted to NERV without trouble. She obediently followed her escorts down to Gendo's office as well. When they stopped at the closed door she hesitated for a moment. She knew what was expected of her now, as she knocked on the door she was ready for whatever harsh words or abuse was waiting for her. She heard Gendo say, "come in Rei," from behind the door.
"Rei, may I ask where Shinji is?"
"I do not know commander."
"Do you know why he has left the Katsuragi residence?"
"No sir, he was vague on his reasons for leaving."
"I see. So how are you feeling Rei?"
That question certainly caught Rei off guard. She had come to the commander expecting him to be angry. She was expecting some more punishment, and to hear the concern in his voice like he had given her when she was a child confused her to say the least. She wanted to smile, but thought that would anger the commander. She asserted herself into making a sufficient response for him.
"I feel... well."
"Good, I knew that you would be able to make it through these hard times."
Rei stared at him with a confused look that only Gendo would be able to recognize.
"I am sorry that I have put you through such an excruciating test, but it was needed for you to start fulfilling your purpose."
Rei heard the sincerity in his voice but couldn't tell if he was trying to trick her, or if he had really been testing her the whole time. She couldn't tell anymore. She wanted it all to be true, but she was smarter than that. She knew that he couldn't have done all that just for a test. But the tone in his voice made it all seem all right. She had missed that in him.
Then Gendo asked something that almost made Rei decide he had changed for the better. "How are you feeling Rei?" he would only ask her that after he had had a good day, it would always make her feel special, more human in a sense. And Gendo knew that.
Misato answered her cell phone, "yes? Okay, I'll be right there." Gendo wanted to see her right away. 'Damn it, they got Rei and now they want to see me. Did Ritsuko sell me out?'
Rei sat outside Gendo's office after they had their little chat. He never raised his voice; he never made her feel insecure or troubled. He just talked like he did before… before all of this happened. 'Did I finally please the commander? I must have done what is right. Yet, why do I feel so anxious waiting for the captain then? What is out of place?'
"Rei! I'm sorry I couldn't get to you before…" Misato stopped when she saw Ritsuko walking towards them. "Was it you Ritsuko? Did you sell me out?"
"The commander wants to see you, Captain." Ritsuko said. Misato looked back at Rei, and then walked past Ritsuko quickly to keep her self from screaming at the woman she thought of as her friend.
Misato walked in front of the commander's desk with somewhat of a defiant look. "Yes sir. You wanted to see me."
"You volunteered to take the pilots in, and yet you can not keep track of them even. I was just informed that the third child is missing as well. What do you have to say for yourself?"
"These kids are having a hard time dealing with saving the world by themselves! Shinji attempted suicide, now he ran away! Asuka refuses to interact with anyone, and Rei who has so much trouble expressing herself wanted time alone. She was probably relieving stress when section 2 picked her up by the pool." Misato let her emotion get the better of her.
"Thank you for the report on their mental conditions captain. Keep me informed, that is all." Gendo said as he spun his chair around. That was when Misato knew she had been tricked. She told him everything and the reports were complete contradiction of what had actually happened.
Misto nearly stumble out of the commander's office. 'I can't believe that I fell for that. Damn him. He's always one step ahead of everything.' She sat down next to Rei outside the office.
"I don't know how we'll be able to do this with ought falling right into his hands, Rei." Rei didn't seem like she heard her.
Misato stood slowly, "c'mon Rei, let's…" an alarm sounded throughout NERV. Misato's cell phone rang.
"Get Asuka down to NERV, tell Rei to suit up. It's an angel." Fuyutski's voice said and hung up.
"Get ready Rei, I need to get Asuka, hurry."
Shinji was sitting on a field of grass staring into the city. He saw it slowly sink into the ground, bracing for an attack. He shuttered at the thought of another angel attack. "Why again?" he stood, then shook his head. "They don't need me. No one needs me." He lay down again and closed his eyes.
"What the hell is that noise?" Asuka looked out the balcony and saw a dozen fighter jets fly over. "Yes, show time. Now they'll see how things should be done. With the wonder kids gone, it means its all on me."
Asuka ran down stairs just as Mistato was pulling up. She smiled, "I knew you'd come crawling for my help."
"Come on Asuka, they sighted an angel coming towards land."
Asuka felt like she could take on the world by herself at that point. She loved the feeling of being the only person with power to do anything. "I can't wait to take down that angel. I didn't need those wonder kids help anyway."
"They found Rei, she'll be your back up in unit 01. We don't know much about the angel so you'll get a full briefing after you're suited up." Misato got to NERV in record time, and they were lowered to the geo front. 'Damn Shinji, where the hell are you?"
In NERV control Gendo sat at the head, watching the engineers get information on the angel. Doctor Akagi was issuing the commands so far.
"Configure unit 01 for Rei, two minutes. Get some visuals on the angel, we need a strategy. Ready unit 02 for launch, Asuka is on her way."
Rei came to the control room in her plug suit and went to Gendo. "Get ready to launch Rei, and then wait for orders." Rei left and followed orders.
Misato came in the control room, putting on her jacket, "where is the angel?"
"it's headed to land, we haven't got much time before it arrives.." Ritsuko said.
Gendo was thinking out a plan, trying to see all the possibilities of the attack, 'where is the third? Unit 01 was designed with him in mind, I need him to pilot.' His pager went off on silent vibrate. What looked like random numbers was actually code for SEELE calling a meeting.. he wasn't about to deny them his presence, they probably thought that the angel attack would keep him from attending.
"Captain Katsuragi, I'm leaving you in head of operations, do not disappoint me." Everyone was stunned that he would have some place else to be at a time like this. Without another word he took the lift down and out.
"I don't believe it…" Ritsuko said.
Misato was baffeled as everyone but recovered the quickest. 'Maybe this is a test for me?'
"Okay everyone, let's focus. I want units 01 and 02 airborne with mobile powercables at the shoreline. We'll try not to engage in the city. Get moving people!" Misato went over to Maya's station, "Rei, Asuka, you read?"
"Yes." They said simotainiously.
"You're going airborne to engage the angel at the shore. Rei, I want you back with a rifle, your synch is not as high as it is in unit 00. Asuka, I want you to engage then pull back. I want to see how it fights before we make a solid attack plan. Otherwise just don't get killed… are the transporst ready yet?"
"Yes ma'am"
"Launch Evas!"
The Evas were airborne for one whole minute. The freefall landing went exactly as planed. Once they had the power cables attached they took up their positions. They had a few minutes to wait for the arrival.
"Why didn't I get my first real battle in Japan as a solo? Two on one is not a fair fight." Asuka complain to no one in particular.
"Survivability takes presidence over fairness Asuka. So stick with the plan. Rei, constant shots with the rifle, close in slowly and try to stay covered. Asuka get mid ranged and look for an opening. Quick attack then out, I don't want you trying for a fast kill. We still don't know how it will react."
"Understood." Rei said.
Asuka opened a channel to Rei, "Don't bother to get dirty wondergirl, this ones mine."
The angels shadow underneath the water approached the shore, and slowly rose out of the water. When it was completely upright, Rei opened fire. Asuka however mad a mad dash at the angel with a spear in hand.
"Unit 02 you are entering my line of fire!" Rei shouted with no avail. She had to hold her fire to keep from hitting Asuka. 'She is so reckless, and to disobey a direct order…' Asuka then cut the angel in half, right down the center. Rei looked on concerned, 'it's not over yet…'
Unit 02 went sailing through the air colliding with the mountains a quarter mile behind them. The angel had sent an energy wave that made direct contact. Asuka didn't make a sound as she lifelessly hit the ground. Rei pulled out her progressive knife as the angel approached her. She saw something in the corner of her eye, it was the replica that the angel had created of itself as it was split in two. She knew a hopeless situation when she saw one. She only had time to put up her hands as she felt energy gather and fly at her full force from the angel. Her and unit 01 went skidding across the ocean surface.
"Unit 02 slid into the mountain pass, it's stuck there, Asuka doesn't appear to be hurt. Rei is unconscious, unit 01 went off line. The U.N is sending a message…" Maya read it to everyone as it came in. " the Eva's have failed, we'll lure the angel to and unpopulated area and use N2 mines. Stand by."
"Damn it, why's this happening now?" Misato slammed her hand on the control panel. "Get the pilots back here and get unit 02 out of the dirt."
"Yes ma'am"
Asuka was furious, shouting so much to control that they shut off her communications. Rei just laid unconscious in her entry plug. 'Half alive? Why are you here Rei? You are not supposed to be here. Not yet. Wake up.' An omnipotent voice spoke, she was too terrified to respond. She felt the warmth of light on her face as she woke up in a carrier heading back to NERV. "Miss Ayanami is awake; we're on approach, over."
Shinji saw it all happen from afar. The Eva's attacking and failing, and then the pilots being retrieved after the angel was drawn away by the U.N. When he saw the jest leave the area surrounding the angel in one quick action, he knew what was coming and dove for cover. The shockwave threw debris over him for what felt like forever.
When everything finally stopped shaking he stood up and saw what was left of the angel. It looked like two separate heaps of metal. It wasn't dead, but the mountains were gone. 'I have to get back to NERV. Piloting unit 01 is my responsibility, not Rei's. Who cares what the voices say, I have to listen to myself. What am I even doing out here? Someone actually needs me.'
Asuka and Rei were taken to the board room to review the situation. "What the hell did you think you were doing wonder girl? If you wouldn't have gotten involved, I could have handled it." Asuka shouted at Rei. Rei just sat and looked at the projection screen of the injured angel.
"Asuka that's enough, sit down." Fyutski said. "We were completely unprepared and you made a fool of us. The U.N hit it with a N2 mine, putting it out of commission for now. Our estimation is six days until it regenerates itself fully. We need to come up with a plan before then. I'll inform commander Ikari about this personally. Katsurai, I'll expect some sort of solution and the reports taken care of ASAP." Fuyitski left.
Once Fuyitski left, Asuka tried to blame it all on Rei again. She was basicallu ignored by everyone this time.
"At least we have some time to recover, what more could we ask for?" Kaji said.
"From our analysis the angel has the ability to divide its core in two selves. Each one is just as powerful as if it was whole, and yet it is much quicker." Maya said.
Ritsuko got up and turned off the projector. She looked at Asuka pouting and Rei staring off into screen where the image was. "Why don't we take some time to think about this? Asuka, Rei, go change out of your plug suits and meet us in the control room. And by the way Rei. Does your head still hurt? Any dizziness?"
"Yes doctor."
"Report to the medical wing before the control room. Asuka you could accompany her please."
"Why do I have to walk the doll around?" She said under her breath.
Gendo's office+
Gendo sat in the SEELE meeting with his attention in two places. From his desk he saw thw whole incident with the Eva's and heard the committee members babble on, obviously more testy than usual.
"Listen Ikari, the cost for NERV has raised a few eyebrows, we can't keep up the funds if you keep destroying the city and you Evangelions every time an angel attacks. The repair costs for unit 00 can well exceed your limit. Remember our priority, the human enhancement project. Don't get careless when there is still so much to come." The images faded one by one leaving Gendo to sit in the darkness for nearly a minute before Fuyutski knocked at the door.
"Come in Fuyutski."
He walked in knowing that Gendo already knew everything that had happened with the attack. "What are your plans for the angel attack Ikari?"
Gendo just smiled at a monitor. "Let Katsuragi deal with matter for now... Shinji just swiped his security card. I'll meet him before he gets to Rei."
in the locker rooms+
"Did you see Misato's face when sub commander Fyutski said he was going to report to the commander? She looked sick." Asuka tried to talk to Rei whiel they changed. "You know, I could have taken care of that angel, but I had to watch out for you wondergirl. Your synch ratio isn't nearly as high as mine...you got a wittle bump on your head? Hehe. Your as tough as glass." Asuka was ready and waited while Rei tied her shoes. "Why the hell don't you talk? You're hopeless." Asukuia growled.
Rei stood up and felt light headed, staggering forward. Asuka instinctively caught Rei before she lost her balance. "Lucky I'm here eh wondergirl? What would you do without me?" Rei looked like she had a splitting headache. "Maybe you did get hurt. Come on then, I see you do need my help then." She straightened Rei up. "Don't be so dramatic." She said as she led her out.
elevator. +
'I hate this place. How did I get caught up in all of this... my fathers fault, as usual. He's the source of all my pain. But...what happened to Rei in unit 01? Will she forgive me for leaving when she needed me? Is she hurt? I need to see her.' The elevator ride was tormenting. Each floor just clicked by slowly until it suddenly chimed and slid the doors slid open. Shinji felt insignificant when he saw his father standing outside, staring down at him through his sun glasses.
"Follow me third child." Gendo turned and walked down the hall. Shinji knew he had no choice but to follow him. Gendo opened the door to his office and walked to a display on the wall, crossing his hands behind his back. He didn't turn when he spoke to Shinji.
"What made you come back?"
"I had to pilot unit 01."
"Oh? You know your place then third child." Gendo turned to face Shinji. "I want this to be the last time you run away like a coward, third child. All your life you've been running. But now you have a purpose, to destroy the enemy, the angels." Shinji felt that Gendo had the power to take anything and everything away from him, just reminding him how pathetic he felt.
"No more disobedience from you, none at all. You would not want to disobey me. Things may get difficult for you if you do. I'm keeping you under survalence. Go back to your residence and wait for orders. Dismissed." Shinji was wide eyed and shaken as he left the office with his head hung low.
Once the door was closed Gendo pressed the comm. Button. "Alert section 2 that the third has returned and should be kept under surveillance. Inform Katsuragi that the third has returned as well...and tell Dr. Akagi to report at 1600hours."
"Yes sir."
Rei followed the impatient Asuka to so the doctor. She didn't know the doctors name even though she had been treated by her more than a normal person would even see a doctor.
"Wonder girl almost passed out in the locker rooms. Dr. Akagi said to bring her." Asuka said as she plopped herself on a cushy seat. The doctor patted the exam table for Rei to sit. She shinned a flashlight in Rei's eyes.
"You've got a mild concussion Rei." The doctor felt Rei's head gently, "and a nasty lump too, well... it'll be a nasty lump soon." The doctor sighed. "You're in here too much Rei, want a minor pain reliever?"
"Yes." Rei took the pills and dry swallowed them. The doctor cracked a small ice pack and held it to Rei's head as she wrapped it. "This will make you feel better soon. Take it off in an hour, okay?"
"Yes ma'am."
Rei felt the relief start to take place. 'I have failed to complete an order. How will I be punished? When will I be able to speak with Shinji again? If ever...' Rei noticed Asuka reading a magazine that was left lying around. 'Have I misjudged pilot Soryu? She disobeyed an order and endangered both our lives, and yet she helped me seek medical attention. I do not understand her, do I hate her?'
"Rei? Any other injuries?" Rei slowly shook her head. "Please be careful out there, up we go, easy now." The doctor helped her up. "If you have any more dizziness or blackouts come back right away, okay? Bye now."
"About time. I can't wait till we can get back out there and get our honor back from that angel. Misato better have a realistic plan." They walked to the elevators. "I hope unit 02 is ready to go." The elevator door slid open before they had a chance to press a button.
"Rei thought that she was hallucinating. "Shinji?"
"I was wondering when you'd show your face again third child. Why'd you come back? Didn't think us girls could handle it? Well don't worry Shinji, I can take care of it. You're just gonna get in the way."
"Sorry..." He was leaning against the wall just looking at the floor. Rei and Asuka joined him in the elevator.
"Shinji...do not leave again." Rei said so quietly, the sound of the elevator almost overtook her voice. Shinji looked up at Rei and saw the new bandage on her head. "I'm sorry Rei. I'm...sorry."
"Yeah, yeah third child, stop apologizing. We know you came back to get back into the action. Missed piloting your precious unit 01, I know." Asuka had her arms crossed and her back to him.
"It's not that. I just couldn't turn my back on my responsibilities." Shinji said. He let his head drop and self pity take over. 'I'm pathetic. I deserve to suffer in the Eva and be my father's pawn. Is that why I pilot?'
Rei had Shinji back but didn't feel anything liked she hoped she would. 'Am I angry he left? Am I happy he returned like this?' Rei noticed the vast amount of stitches on his arm. 'I have seen him at his weakest. Returning to NERV and his fathers command does, however, show just how strong he could be. He is feeling guilty for leaving. I wish I was not so used to apathy in myself. I want to understand. I want to help. He said to ask anytime..."
"Shinji...what made you return, when it is so much pain to you?" Rei studied him. She wanted to know what could make any human being suffer when they were strong enough to be at peace somewhere else. Shinji flexed his right hand opened and closed a few times.
"Why did I come back? Maybe it was a mistake. I could have been... could have..." Asuka was anticipating the answer just as much as Rei was at this point.
"I...I don't have anything else."
Those words left nothing but silence. What could anyone say to that? Asuka felt them affect her. She couldn't believe those words were true. Asuka quickly thought of how much the Eva had occupied her life. How important it really was to her. That was her reason for never leaving, nor considering it. What else was there in their lives?
Rei saw it from a slightly different approach. Her life was controlled by Gendo before she could remember, but she never saw how sick that was until the marduke report had chosen her as the first. Gendo stopped talking to her like he cared about her, and talked now like she had no free will or emotion. Then when Shinji first came into her life, he became a part of her hell. She didn't even know anything beside what Gendo had allowed her to learn. She was sure he was still keeping her in check in some way.
Shinji had unknowingly brought all three closer at that moment by admitting to them what he truly thought. Normally he would have changed subjects or stuttered so bad he would not have answered, but his will was hanging on by a thread, he was almost defeated.
The pilots had very much in common.
AN: i'll write more as soon as i can. peace people.