Chapter 5: Meetings and Partings

They were all tired; they had walked for hours since they had left the forbidden forest, waiting for Harry to deem it safe before they could make camp. He had told them that it was best to travel during the day, but, seeing as they had gotten a late start, they needed to avoid bandits falling upon them since they liked to hunt during the night. Everyone, even the fittest of them, was stumbling along, while Harry looked like he could go another 8 hours no problem; it was very annoying, and, for once, everyone agreed. They had finally stopped in a small clearing near running water, and everyone had basically collapsed where they stood, except for Harry who unpacked his supplies and unshrunk them while directing everyone on what to do. He had not spoken past telling them that they had to be quiet and follow his orders. While many had chosen to follow him, they all wanted more explanations than he had given, but, since it was at least midnight and they were too tired to do much more, they would wait.

Ron and Hermione were starting to get angry at the lack of acknowledgement from Harry except for the warning to Ron before they had set out. They were confused and hurt by his treatment of them after all they had gone through. Ron was still smarting after the dressing down his best friend had given him in defense of slimy Slytherins. He hadn't even said hello, and Hermione wanted to know why he had sent her on a wild goose chase with those odd books. They would have approached him, but they didn't know how to approach the new him; he was no longer angry like fifth year; he seemed to posses only one state of mind, and it was complete happiness and babbling, as well as a cold eyed look in midst of all the cheerfulness.

Draco, after doing what Potter had told him, went over to him and his horse. The animal was beautiful, 17 hands if he judged correctly, glistening coat of gray with a lightning bolt shaped patch of white on the stallions left rump. Shadow certainly fit his color scheme; he blended into shadows very well. "You forgot to mention the trek across Merlin knows where in all your little speeches, Potter…"

"Well duh…like that would win over supporters. Yes, we are at war, and I will train you…by the way, you have to trek across Merlin knows where for two days before we reach our destination…somehow I don't think that would have gone over well."

"True, but it still would have been informative to say the least. So, the golden duo has been giving you looks since we camped; when are you going to talk to them? They are practically frothing at the mouth to chat." Draco saw the frown Harry cast in the direction of his friends and wondered about it.

"It's not the same anymore, Draco. I've had to grow-up; there are no rose colored glasses in my future. I've seen too much, and by the end of this war I will have done too much. I've already started down that road; there is no going back…not anymore at least, not for me at any rate."

"Well, you have to tell them something. They are not just going to not talk because you're different now. Granted, we like you better this way, but you can't fault them their loyalty and determination. Oh, wow, look at me all with the shoulder to lean on and lending it to you of all people and complementing the biggest gryffindorks out here…the world as we know it is ending." Draco shuddered for effect making a pained face. It served its purpose; Harry laughed.

"Thanks, Draco, I needed that. I feel closer to you thirteen than them, but you're right. I'll go talk to them; maybe it'll help." Draco watched Harry set off towards them, knowing that their friendship would never be the same, maybe with Granger but Weasley was too much of a goody goody. Putting his past dislike for Potter behind him had been surprisingly easy; although, he never really hated him, just disliked him, but he had respected him as well for escaping and thwarting Voldermort so many times. He was brought out of his musings as Pansy called him over to eat; Potter would find him if he needed a laugh again.

Ron and Hermione watched Malfoy of all people talk to Harry and make him laugh as if they were old friends. It made them mad that he could so easily do it while they were still trying to figure out how to approach him. They didn't have to figure anything else out when they saw Harry leave Malfoy and head straight for them. They swallowed nervously and fidgeted.

"Hi guys…sorry about whatever it is that I've done." Listing all of the slights real or imaginary just seemed like a waste of time to him.

"It's OK; it's been a hectic few hours. We're glad you're fine, we missed you." Hermione added warmly.

"Yeah, what she said." Ron added with a grin noticing Harry smile back weakly.

"So…what's new with you guys?" Harry asked, desperately trying to break the oppressive silence that had lingered far too long; that was all it took for Ron and Hermione to launch into the events of what had gone on between the time Harry disappeared and the time he showed up. They never noticed that Harry was anything but attentive; he just made sure to smile and nod at appropriate places all the while reviewing what he would tell them.

"That's about all. What about you? What is with bringing the Slytherins anyway?" Harry forced himself to ignore that remark focusing on what he had to do now.

"Forget the Slytherins for now. I have something I need to tell you, and I want you two to really listen before saying anything."

"Sure thing mate."

"Bloody fucking hell, this is harder than I thought. Yes, I curse now; it's hard not to pick it up, and no, I'm not going to stop because you ask Herm. It's been one year since I left. I know it's only been three months to you, but a whole year has passed for me. During that year I've had to grow up, but, most of all, I had to relearn everything I thought I knew. I'm not the same person you were friends with. I'm never going to be him again. I don't regret the choices I have made, but I do regret loosing you two," Harry held up a hand for silence as they both started to protest. "I have lost you because I can no longer relate to you; we are at two different sides of the same spectrum. While we are here I will train you, but even then it's doubtful you will understand me as your ethics, morals, or beliefs run deep in both of you."

"What do you mean, Harry?" Hermione didn't like where this was heading; it was obviously going to end badly for them all.

"It's simple really…If I could turn back time right now, and if I went back to third year when Sirius wanted to kill Peter, I wouldn't let him do it, but I would do it and gladly. I show no mercy; I give no quarter, not anymore. There are no second chances. I kill; it's what I do." Ron and Hermione just shook their heads; they didn't understand, but they were shaken by the utter honesty they saw on his face.

"But, Harry, Cedric wasn't your fault, and Sirius…"Ron got no further as Harry cut him off.

"Ron, sometimes you're really thick, you know that? I know I didn't kill Cedric or anyone else; Voldermort chooses to kill, maim, or torture. I learned that."

"Then why are you…?" Hermione motioned vaguely with her hand, not quite sure she wanted to hear the rest, especially after she heard Harry sigh.

"I've killed people who fought for the wrong side in the war. They died by my own hand; I was splattered with their life's blood as it slowly drained out of them, leaving their eyes glassy. I was trained to kill quickly and efficiently by magic and non-magical means. I will take anyone's life that stands in my way be it friend or foe. Do you understand now why we cannot go back to what we had?"

They both nodded dumbly, too shocked to say anything. They knew Harry had said they had to be willing to risk their life for him and kill, but they hadn't thought he meant indiscriminately just because the people they were fighting were on the opposite side. Both of them could understand why they had felt so awkward around Harry now; like he said, he had grown up and changed. One thing was for certain, no matter what, he would always have them, even if they weren't best friends anymore.

"We understand, Harry…well, not really because we haven't done anything like that, so we can't relate, but no matter what, you'll always have our friendship, even if we aren't best friends anymore, and, in truth, it would have happened sooner or later. One of us was bound to grow up; although, I always figured it would be…"Hermione left off, giggling at the boys' glares. She shrugged; it was true, and it had served to lighten the mood.

"Seriously guys, you can no longer expect me to treat you as my friends. You are, and in some ways always will be, but there are things I have to do that are so much bigger than us. I can't afford to favor you, and for that, you will think me cruel. You have chosen to join me, and for that, I am grateful, but it's a hard life I'm leading now, and it'll be a lot harder for you two. It's good that you have each other because the next few years are going to test you in ways that you'd never thought of. I'm not sure how many of the ones present will make it through training, much less war; that is why I can't afford to baby anybody. You learn or you die. It's a ruthless view but only the strong survive in this game, and I need the best with me."

"We understand, Harry, after all, we read the book. I thought it was a joke until you came back. It said some silly things that didn't sound all that inspiring, but I begin to see that we have failed the first lesson." Hermione and Ron looked unhappy at the thought.

Harry laughed ruefully. "You failed to remain as neutral as possible while hiding from both sides I take it?"

"Yeah, we botched that one up but good."

"How's the second lesson coming along then?"

"It's not." Hermione replied shortly, and Harry looked at them quizzically.

"Why?"

"Second lesson was if you couldn't hide from them then join them."

"I think you did that."

"No, because that lesson said to be prepared to commit atrocities in the name of who we joined. We never bothered with that part, just the fact that You-Know-Who is evil, and we are good. Sounds like a right stupid reason to follow you, not thinking that we wouldn't only be fighting him but his followers, our friends, peers and, in some cases, family. Oh, Harry, we were so stupid thinking that; I see it now. Me, the queen of research, couldn't even read the most important book of her life correctly…" Hermione was clutching Ron's hand as if that was the only thing standing between her and utter madness.

"Oy, Herm, don't worry. I skipped parts of the book; at least you read it. I went from Lesson one to three, and I'm afraid that I failed that one too…can't keep my emotions under control to save my life. I also can't see the reasoning behind what You-Know-Who is doing." Harry just laughed, wondering how they had managed to survive so long facing Voldermort year after year.

"Well, Ron, I'd hate to break this to you, but you failed Lesson number four, too. It specifically said trust no one, not even your family or friends, for their views differ from yours, no matter how close you are." Harry smirked; it seemed the book had not made them aware of the things he had hoped.

"Sure, rub it in why don't you…we don't feel dumb enough already, Harry…please continue, I'm sure by the time you're done Hermione here will have crushed my hand…" Ron grinned when Herm let go of his hand sheepishly.

"Truly, Harry, why are Malfoy and his bunch here?" Ron asked. Harry noticed that the loathing that usually accompanied any question involving anything Slytherin was gone; in its place was honest curiosity.

"They are here because they choose to follow me, much like you."

"You cannot be serious!" Ron exclaimed. Harry forestalled anything else Ron would say when he held up his hand in a gesture reminiscent of the headmaster.

"I asked them to join me because they are…dark…much like me. You only see the house they were sorted into; you don't look beyond that and see them, Ronald. They, like you, are people with feelings, ideas, and courage that far outweigh Gryffindor bravery. You can't choose whom you are related to. Just as it's not our fault our parents choose to do what is best for them and expect us to follow. James and Lily chose to put their lives on the line fighting Voldermort, even knowing they could die and leave me alone like they did…so what does that make them? Are they any different than Draco's parents? Or yours, for that matter? They all want what's best for their children."

"But how is the best for their children teaching them dark arts and to hate muggleborns?" Hermione asked.

"What many wizards today don't understand is that 1000 years ago, even before that, muggleborn witches and wizards were a problem for the wizarding world. After being taught at Hogwarts they left the wizarding world and went back to their muggle families, showing them what they had learned. Back then being different wasn't a good thing; having powers was considered the work of the devil. The muggleborn witches and wizards were killed and tortured in horrible ways before they gave up secrets of the wizarding world. Salazar Slytherin wanted them out of Hogwarts because they were causing their own deaths as well as other witches and wizards' deaths. Muggle repellent charms weren't invented until centuries later; meanwhile, muggles interacted with magical folks who relied on discretion. Their identities were no longer secret after muggleborns gave them the names of wizarding families under torture. Salazar Slytherin lost family during the time of persecution by the muggles, as did many others. That's what caused the split, not him being some evil dark lord. All the families considered dark today were almost systematically exterminated by witch-hunts; after that they grew to hate muggles and, by extension, muggleborns. Don't you understand, at the time Salazar had the right idea…they are justified by their hate, it's the same one I have against Voldermort."

"All right, Harry, but they still practice dark arts." Ron said defensively. He had heard his grandparents comment on the family history involving those dark times and knew that some of what Harry said could possibly be true.

"When Malfoy insults your wizard's pride, Ron, he doesn't mean about you liking muggles and muggleborns. He means that your family has forgotten their origins…family is very important to purebloods, and yours seem to have forgotten that they rode with the Malfoy's, Black's, and Lestrange's under the same banner and label. However, that is a tale for another time. Remember, when you point fingers they only lead back to you. You will work together with Draco, or you will die…there is no other way."

"Harry…"

"No. Those Slytherins are all that's between Voldermort's victory and us. I will not have them insulted by anyone's prejudices."

"All right, Harry, we will do our best to see past our prejudices." Hermione answered knowing that Harry was dead serious about killing anyone caught insulting or provoking their former rivals.

"Yes, well, as long as you understand what's expected from now on. I have to go make sure no one's planning on having my ickle trainees as sport…there are those that would think it fun to hunt you guys down just to see you squeal…never done it myself, but I heard it's quite amusing with the correct prey…hopefully I'll be able to play with some Death eaters as prey…" Harry mumbled more to himself than his somewhat friends, never noticing the horrified looks they were giving him as he left to search out the surrounding area for bad guys.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~