**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or the quote below. I just own Sintary ^^ Also I do not own the other OC Kokuro. He's my friend's.
Wow... so sorry this took like a week to get together. I had worked so much, I was just exhausted all the time. In that time, however, my friend (let's call him Kokuro since it's his creator) had put together the beginning's of what is going to be known at Dear Itachi: The Tales of Kokuro. I don't particularly care for the way he's written it so we've put a poll together. You can access the story under my account along with the poll. Please, any feedback will be great for us! We're excited for you to see Kokuro's story as well as welcome back ITACHI! So, please enjoy the next installment of Dear Itachi.
"I like to think that we had it all
We drew a map to a better place
But on that road I took a fall
Oh baby why did you run away?
I was there for you
In your darkest times
I was there for you
In your darkest nights
But I wonder where were you?
When I was at my worst
Down on my knees
And you said you had my back
So I wonder where were you?
When all the roads you took came back to me"
-Maroon 5, Maps.
A long, painful sigh escaped the shinobi's dried lips before falling claim to another coughing fit. The cough was wet and draining. One hand went to his mouth while the other clutched his abdomen as he leaned forward from the force of the cough.
Once the fit had subsided, he pulled his hand away and grimaced seeing it was stained with blood again. He quickly washed that hand and gripped the edges of his simple sink.
Washing the blood off his hand didn't mean it was completely gone.
No.
This shinobi's hands were permanently stained red. No amount of soap, vinegar, or bleach will ever rid him of the truth.
He had slain many in his twenty-one years of living… and many of them had been his own kin.
He was reaping his sins now though.
He was dying.
A small curve of his lips appeared at the thought of the great Itachi Uchiha dying from an illness. It was an unfitting end for one so bathed in blood. The fitting way to go out would be in a pool of his own life force; preferably through a fatal wound and not from his weak lungs.
Itachi exhale another long breath as he closed his eyes. How his thoughts became to morbid was beyond him. Maybe it was because he grew up in violence. Maybe it was because he was always surrounded by violence. Maybe it was because he had been planning his own death for five years.
Pain emitted from his chest. But it wasn't his lungs this time… no, it was his heart.
Five years since he had lost his family to the greed for power.
Five years since he had put on the mask of a villain.
Five years since he had left everything behind.
Five years since he had been without his brother.
Five years since he had been without one of his best friends.
Five years since he had been without his beloved.
Itachi let his head fall back. Oh, did that hurt. It hurt more than his lungs burning on every breath he took. Every time he thought of her, it felt like he was being suffocated. He couldn't breathe without her there. He ached to see her smiling face again… he could hardly remember what it looked like.
The young man had thought of seeing her again all those years ago when he had made an appearance in the Leaf Village. However, he and his partner hadn't made it that far into the village before they had come across their target… and his brother.
He was another disappointment.
Rumors had circulated throughout the five nations. Sasuke Uchiha had defected from Konoha and had gone to Orochimaru in search of power. Although this was not what he had in mind for his little brother when he told him to get stronger, the older Uchiha had to admit this was his fault. He hoped the situation would be rectified when he met his end.
Other rumors had reached his trained ears such as Sintary being pregnant with his child, and Kokuro being a silent assistant for the ROOT's leader, Danzo.
The first, he had dismissed as just a rumor. There wasn't a chance Sintary would have been pregnant. Since the shot for kunoichi worked miracles for those working in the seduction field, they had always depended on it to work. They timed every event based on the specifications that injection gave. There wasn't a chance.
The second, he knew to be true. Kokuro was a formidable opponent. It was only a matter of time before he was asked to be an assailant for the village, and the one who orchestrated those missions was Danzo. His contact had told him – vaguely – that the boy had underwent "special training." Whatever that had entailed hadn't ended well for Kokuro, but there wasn't much Itachi or his contact could do without specifics.
Itachi swallowed the bitter medicine he took to keep his illness at bay. He was running low, but thankfully the small village he had been assigned to go to had a medicine woman there that could help him.
The young shinobi tied the length of his hair back before tying his headband on and pulling on his shirt followed by his cloak. He looked at himself in the mirror as his charcoal eyes bled red, and the mask he wore settled into place.
The mask of a villain.
The mask of a murderer.
The mask of a man who could never love or be loved by anyone.
"This has been one boring mission. Eh, Itachi?" The tall, blue shinobi asked his partner.
"Quite numbing," the shorter shinobi replied.
They were a strange pair, Itachi thought to himself. His partner, Kisame Hoshigaki, was one of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist, and presented shark-like appearance from his affinity for the creatures of the deep sea. The two were opposite in personalities like most Akatsuki partners, but the two had managed to form a sense of respect for each other. Itachi had learned that any mission that didn't involve a type of battle, his partner would often comment that it was "a boring one."
Though, Itachi had to admit this one had been especially boring even for him. They had traveled into the Land of Earth to follow up with supposed lead. The informer had been a killed before they had arrived. The Uchiha had then had gone to the medicine woman he had heard about, and she warned him of his death. Itachi took what she had to offer with a blank face. She was not the first with this prognostic, and she would not be the last. The two had then begun their journey back to Amegakure.
The pair had walked at a leisurely pace on the back roads. It was there they came across an old battle scene. Immediately analyzing the scene, Itachi came to the conclusion his brother had been one of the shinobi; he could still sense his chakra even if it was faded. This meant they couldn't stick around very long. One of his new teammates had a gifted ability to sense chakra at distance.
Just as he was about to speak, his partner picked up an old-looking, black book. The blue man flipped opened the book and a toothy smirk crossed his lips.
"Oi, Itachi! Is this you?" Kisame asked flipping around a small photograph that struck his partner to the core.
While he remained passive and unrevealing, Itachi's heart was pounding erratically in his chest. Between Kisame's two fingers was an old picture of him and… and Sintary. Itachi's throat became tight, and he thought he was going to have another coughing fit right in front of his partner, but the bloody gasps of air never came. Just the never ending feeling of remorse and longing.
Realizing his partner was actually expecting a reply, Itachi slowly nodded. "It is a very old picture."
Kisame smirked more and turned it around to look at it more. "Who's the hottie next to you?"
"An old teammate," he told him, not willing to reveal more.
The shark-man took the answer and placed it back inside the book before reading some of it.
"Kisame, we really should dwell here. My brother was here. His partner must have sensed our chakra. We don't want to risk a fight between them that will delay our expected arrival." Itachi told the taller man as he turned away.
The man in question nodded and tucked the book away. It was important he gave this diary to the younger man, but not here and now.
The duo made a quick leave out of Iwagakure and only returned to their unhurried pace once they entered Amegakure with the familiar down poor of rain. The Village Hidden in the Rain was just about the only village the Akatsuki were "welcomed." This was due to the fact that the face of the band of criminals was the village's kage. The actual hideout was still further south, but they would need to stop for the night, and it was best to do it here.
The two booked adjourning rooms, having no need for a double room. Itachi would stay inside his room while Kisame would go down to the tavern for drinks. The swordsman left his prized possession in his partner's room so he knew it was safe.
On his way out, Kisame tossed the journal to his friend who elegantly caught it.
Itachi looked over the small book, and then back at his partner.
"Read it," the man in question replied before closing the door behind him.
The smaller man set it down on his nightstand before allowing himself to disrobe a bit. He took off his bulky coat and neatly folded it across the chair in the corner of the room. He then sat in the twin sized bed. His back rested against the headboard with the pillow acting as a cushion. He bent one leg up while he allowed the other to lay out.
Now it was time for the book.
Itachi opened it to the first page. That was where the picture of him and Sintary was placed. His heart ached remembering that day; it had been their first date at only thirteen, and the old woman at the dango shop had insisted on taking that picture. Sintary had wrapped her arms around him while he not expecting a picture, had a dango stick inside his mouth, about to pull it out. The look of slight surprise relayed in his eyes, but it had made Sintary laugh because his guard had actually been down.
Of course he had… he was eating his favorite food with his favorite person.
His red eyes then went his lover's neat handwriting.
"Dear Itachi."
The heading caught him off guard. Were these supposed to be letters to him? Shouldn't such a personal journal have "Dear Diary" instead?
"I've started writing this journal to help me process everything that is going on. You and I always talked about such matters, so I only felt it fitting to write as if I was writing to you. So far it seems to be helping."
That made sense to him now. He had been the one to help Sintary through her anxiety spirals. She had found comfort in confiding in him. Such a thing just doesn't go away.
"I found this empty book inside my second bedroom. You remember? The one we left Kokuro to sleep in and kept most of my extra stuff in? Well, that's going to be Sasuke's new bedroom so I was cleaning it out for him…"
Itachi found himself imagining her writing this. Pausing where those dots were as she tried to gather what he knew was coming next.
"I guess… I just don't know where to start… I guess I should start with my reaction to this morning. I had woken up from a horrible nightmare. You… you had told me to watch over Sasuke, and then—and then you jumped off a cliff! And when I woke up—I… I just had this awful feeling in my gut that something ghastly was about to happen. I immediately searched for you, but came up empty; obviously.
But then… but then I found that stupid white card. 'I'm sorry'? Really?! It felt like someone had ripped my heart out when I read that.
NO.
Scratch that.
It felt like YOU ripped my heart out!
I ran to Kokuro's to try and get him to help me, but he wasn't home yet. I was all on my own, and I honestly didn't know where to begin to look for you. But I found myself heading towards the Uchiha Compound.
And I found everyone dead.
All I could think about was if you were okay. I kept walking down the streets until I came to the one that lead to the main household. I saw Sasuke lying face down in the middle of the road. I was so worried something had happened to him. I rushed him to the hospital awaiting further news.
Kokuro came rushing in shortly after, and both of us were so confused. As we were discussing what could have happened to you, Sasuke woke up and told us you killed everyone. I instantly said you couldn't have done it, but then the Hokage came in and said it was entirely possible for you to do it. And Danzo gave some crap about how "it had all been there" and "he was able to help in time." I would have gagged, but I was too busy having another fucking panic attack! I just couldn't believe you would do something like this! It was so out of character for you, and it just… I knew it wasn't right.
The only thing that pulled me out of the spiral was that the Third Hokage wanted to put Sasuke in the care of the village.
There was no way I was letting that happen, but Danzo gave me shit for not knowing how to take care of a child.
Honestly."
Itachi could feel Sintary rolling her eyes at that comment which made him smirk just a tad.
"But Sasuke agreed he would rather live with me than alone, so that's where we find each other now. He's currently asleep in my bedroom.
I can't sleep, unfortunately. I'm too wired from today. And as I'm writing this… everything is settling in…
I can't believe you murdered everyone. I just can't. I also can't believe you just fucking left me –and Kokuro. After everything we had been through as a team, you just decide one day that you're going to annihilate your family and leave your two best friends behind—leave me behind?!
Nope.
Can't believe it.
Won't believe it.
Not gonna believe it."
Itachi sighed, closing the book for a moment.
He could understand why Sintary was so upset—really he could. It still pained him to read about it though. Despite this, he continued reading.
The next dated entry really stood out to him. It looked like the heading was tossed up there as an afterthought, and his beloved's handwriting was sloppy and –from what he could analyze—pained.
"Dear Itachi,
I KNOW THE TRUTH."
Itachi felt his heart swell in his chest. She knew… Oh thank kami, she knew… There was this wash of relief after reading his sweet Sintary no longer would think of him as a cold-blooded family murderer.
"Unfortunately, they've-they've put-a seal- ON the baCK-of MY NeCK-that-that delIVerS-exCrUCIatINg PaiN doWN-doWN MY bOdY-WheN I trY-MeNtIONINg eITher."
Itachi could just feel her agony through the long jagged lines between words and the forced grip behind her writing. She must have been in so much pain just trying to write this for him to "read." It must have been worse for her not to "tell" anyone deep down.
He continued reading about how Sintary had gotten demoted from ANBU while Kokuro had been recruited for ROOT. She expressed interest in working in the hospital so she could be with Sasuke more at least until he became a shinobi himself in a few short months.
The twenty-one-year-old man soon came to the entry dated on his seventeenth birthday. His heart ached predicting the numerous emotions that would be flying through his lover's mind. His red eyes immediately fell on the word "pregnant," and his heart stopped.
'No…' he thought.
"Dear Itachi…
First off… Happy Birthday… I mean… I guess it must not be very happy since well… since everything that has happened…
I don't know… I don't know how to tell you this… but… well…
I'm pregnant…
…
We… we depended so much on that shot… and with everything that had been going on… I guess we lost track of time… the shot's time frame was up, and well… I ended ovulating because of it… and now I'm pregnant…
Sasuke didn't take it well… and Kokuro… he's another story.
I don't know what they're doing to him in training, but I found him covered in blood; around his eyes, his fingernails, all down his chest. I even found him in a pool of blood earlier this afternoon. And—and he's just acting like such an asshole. He's closing me out, and we NEED each other… yet… he's shutting down on me.
I… I just don't know what to do…
I miss you… I miss you so much… I wish you could come home…"
Itachi closed the book again, his thumb catching his page as he closed his eyes.
She was pregnant…
That rumor… that rumor hadn't been a rumor… it had been true… she had been pregnant with his child… He couldn't imagine what hell the villagers gave her, and he would find out as he kept reading. He had to keep reading. He needed to see if the child made it to term.
Itachi would read her encounter with the masked shinobi that would haunt her nightmares. He was pained to see that she hardly slept anymore, and when she did sleep, she was restless. Her emotions were all over the place with the pregnancy, but he judged she was doing… okay…
It angered him greatly when he read what Danzo had done to her, and that Kokuro had stood by and let it happen. Some best friend he was being. But as he read Sintary's resentment and concern flipping back and forth about their comrade, he realized Danzo was doing something to Kokuro to make him this way. Itachi figured it was some sort of torture since that's usually how Danzo worked, but Sintary didn't know this, and it made it that much harder for her.
Itachi was proud of his little brother though. He had graduated at the top of his class, and from Sintary's tellings, he was a very promising shinobi. He loved she spent so much time with him and worked with him constantly. He knew he had left his brother in good hands with her. He also figured Sasuke was the reason Sintary never came looking for him – that, and then, their baby.
He finally came to page he had been looking for: March 5th...
"Dear Itachi,
Congratulations… you're a father to a beautiful boy name Kazuki…"
Itachi smiled softly at that. Everything he and Sintary loved… summed up into one little name… into one little boy. He took his time processing that… he was a father… the boy would be four this year… his heart quickly sank. He had missed out on four years of his son's life. His first steps, his first words, nightly bedtime stories… and everything else he had done with Sasuke.
He sighed, maybe Sintary wrote it in detail so he could imagine he was there…
Itachi's brows furrowed as he continued on.
"Just as I predicted, the elders hated that fact that I sealed our baby's chakra like I planned."
Wait what? When had she discussed this?
Itachi had been so caught up in everything else going on, he had actually missed that little snippet she gave when Danzo had attacked her.
After he had gotten over the initial shock, Itachi found himself proud of Sintary. While his son probably wouldn't be a shinobi, he also wouldn't be a vessel of power for anyone to manipulate. He was also glad she seemed to out-smart the elders as well. He knew she was a clever one.
He read her first month of true motherhood, just feeling nostalgic overall. He was happy that she was happy now, but he was missing out on being a father.
Itachi then caught the change in tone; and the change in date as he came near the end of her journal.
Sintary hadn't written in a whole month according to the months she had written in, and he would soon find out way.
"Dear Itachi,
As you've noticed by now, I haven't written in a while… It's kinda hard to write without your journal… or with your hands chained above you… or while you're trapped by a madman."
Itachi blinked reading this. What had happened to her?
"The day of the Third Chuunin Exam, Orochimaru, along with assistance from the Sound and Sand Villages, attacked the Leaf. Most people were put under a sleeping Genjutsu, but the shinobi had managed to undo it on themselves. I sent Kokuro to help the Hokage since that seemed to be Orochimaru's goal while I went with Kazuki to hid with the children in the mountains… I never made it though.
I remember there being an explosion and a bunch of Sand and Sound shinobi getting into the village… but then someone came up behind me and pressed a pressure point, and I was out.
I woke up in a cell. My arms chained high above my head while I sat on the floor against a wall. I had very little room to move.
Kazuki was in a small crib next to me, and had been okay as well.
It wasn't until today that I found out what was really going on: Orochimaru plans on creating an Uchiha army to which he can use to manipulate and control the rest of the world with the Sharingan. I don't know exactly how he's going to accomplish that because there's no way Sasuke will agree to even touching me.
That's the other thing…
Sasuke is in league with Orochimaru.
He came on his own, free will.
I'm absolutely crushed at this.
He has advocated for me to actually have a room with a bed, and be fed properly—thankfully, but I'm still so upset that he's here seeking power from Orochimaru.
He claims he saw you.
I guess it will do nothing dwelling over why you were in the Leaf Village risking your safety.
Oh well.
This is where I must stop.
Maybe Sasuke will get me a new journal to keep me sane.
I hope you're doing okay.
Love,
Sintary."
Itachi felt an anger so intense boiling inside him. He hadn't felt something like this since he had met Danzo. That snake had his Sintary and his child in his grubby hands. And he has had them for four years presumably now.
Itachi swung his feet off the bed and flung on his cloak. Tying his ninja headband on, he had made up his mind.
Orders be damned.
He was going to find and save his damsel and his son.
Thank you to KnightsRoses, Sweet Petit, arigarciar, Ijustdon'tcare132, KyuubiNoPuma, pika-78, Rose 23527, ILurveManyAnimeBoys, xxRyuu-himexx, nathy13, HonestxxEyes, NinjaChipmunk, PityThoseWhoLiveWithoutLove-95, animefangirl0219, creven16, randomindividual467, darkxion, OrangeBeanGamer, terriblecupcakes732, Integral16, MickyLove, Elizabethcica, KHB123, FailingErin, MaidMaliya, Johana-98, ElephantLover220, Bananarock509, nacheell, LadyLunaTwilight, slowbro0609, CommanderCats, juury, Katelynn Snow Fox, sierra halle, Crazedstill99, Ne Ne Papa Ne Ne Mama, scarlet-angle-13, and kyoko minion, for following/favorite-ing the story!
A special thanks to ILurveManyAnimeBoys, Rose23527, HonestxxEyes, bunnyguest, an unknown Guest, nacheel, and FailingErin for their reviews and requests for updates!
AND PLEASE GIVE A BIG THANK YOU TO MY RP PARTNER (who I am not naming for her privacy)! Without her cooperation and amazing ability to play Uchiha men, this idea would have never been brought to life! On that note, from here on out, everything is coming from my own crazy head. Hope you'll all enjoy it as much! Also: Final remainder; please check out Dear Itachi: The Tales of Kokuro for another view of your favorite characters and either comment and/or vote in the poll so we know how you guys are feeling it!THANK YOU!