FIVE

"Cole?" Paige managed to choke out. "You're Colina Benjamin?"

"Elbert, I'm going to kill you," said Cole in exasperation. "You swore you would never tell anyone about that."

"Oh, yeah, I did, didn't I," said Elbert blithely. "Forget I said anything."

"Cole Turner," said Phoebe, "you're a romance novelist?"

"Look," said Cole, "it was a long time ago and we didn't exactly co-write it together. I just sort of reworked it some because Elbert is dyslexic."

"A dyslexic demon?" Leo asked.

"Don't forget color blind," said Elbert.

"Well, well," said Piper. "It seems there's more to Cole Turner than even we suspected."

"Elbert," said Cole, "did you forget our little deal? You were never supposed to tell anyone about Colina. Belthazor is not going to be a happy camper."

"Oops," said Elbert. "Let's just pretend I didn't say anything, okay? What do you say?"

"Can't unring that bell," snickered Phoebe.

"Bell?" questioned Elbert. "I didn't hear any bell. What bell?"

"It's just a figure of speech," Leo said with a wide grin. "But, as interesting as these little tidbits are, Cole is right about one thing. You still have Tazak to contend with. When he finds out that Elbert failed in getting the Book of Shadows he'll probably hire someone else to come get it if he wants it that badly."

"Leo has a point," said Piper. "If he wants it that badly I doubt he'll give up on it easily."

"Then we'd better prepare for it," said Paige. "I say we find this Tazak and vanquish his sorry butt before he has a chance to hire someone else."

"Oh, that's not a good idea," said Elbert. "He's very powerful and important. Nearly as important as Uncle Source, er, that is, Uncle Elbert."

"Just call him the Source," said Cole.

"He's a demon," said Paige. "We vanquish demons. It's what we do."

"Elbert's right," said Cole. "Tazak is not going to be easy to vanquish."

"Well," said Phoebe, "we do have an advantage. You and Elbert can tell us everything you know about him. And if he's that important I'm sure he's in the Book of Shadows. There might even be a vanquishing potion or spell for him."

"Somehow I doubt that," Cole muttered.

"It can't hurt to look him up," said Paige. "I'll get the Book of Shadows."

"Oh, I can do that," said Elbert.

Suddenly he shimmered out and was gone.

"He suddenly got good at shimmering," said Phoebe.

"Probably because I'm here," said Cole. "He has trouble shimmering when he's nervous. And I haven't noticed him lisp once. I guess my presence makes him feel more at ease. When he's nervous his 'R's' become 'W's'."

"Yeah, we noticed that," said Piper. A look of horror abruptly crossed her face. "Wait a minute. Did he just say he was going to get the Book of Shadows?"

Before anyone could move or speak a blood-curdling scream emanated from the attic.

"What was that?" asked Leo.

"Nothing to be concerned with," said Cole calmly. "Hang on a second."

A moment later Elbert shimmered into the living room. He was cradling the Book of Shadows to his chest. He was also shaking violently.

"I-I-It's weally, dawk up thewe, did you know that?" Oh, hewe you go." Elbert held out the book in his trembling hands.

"He's afraid of the dark?" Paige asked as she quickly took the Book of Shadows.

"Elbert, calm down," said Cole. "The lights are on down here. You're perfectly all right."

"Yeah, but you don't understand," said Elbert. "It's weally, weally dawk up thewe."

"Cole, he had the Book of Shadows," said Phoebe. "That can't be. Evil can't even touch the book. How can he pick it up and take it out of the attic?"

"The only thing that makes any sense is that the book doesn't see him as a threat," said Leo. "Although I'm at a loss to explain that about a demon."

"This is not good," said Piper. "A demon that can touch the Book of Shadows? Not good at all."

"I told you he isn't exactly evil," said Cole.

"That's not my fault," Elbert muttered dejectedly.

"He's still a demon," Piper insisted. "And if he can take the Book of Shadows that makes him a threat. Especially if he's trying to get it for a higher level demon."

"Me?" questioned Elbert. "I'm not a threat. Really. I could have shimmered out with it. I didn't. I brought it right down here just as you wanted."

"He has a point," said Leo. "He did bring it down here instead of taking it to the underworld."

"He's still a threat," said Piper. "We can't let him walk around free. The Book of Shadows would be at risk all the time."

"I won't do it again," said Elbert. "You have my word."

"The word of a demon?" Paige questioned. "Not exactly reassuring."

"I think we should vanquish this Tazak, first," said Phoebe. "Elbert doesn't seem to be a threat especially with Cole here. If we take Tazak out he can't hire anyone else to try to get the book. Then we can decide what to do about Elbert."

"That's a good idea," said Piper.

"Except there's no Tazak in the book," said Paige. "So I guess we'll have to rely on Cole and Elbert to fill us in on him."

"Yes, well," Cole began nervously.

"Oh, I can do that," said Elbert. "He's just about the oldest demon in the underworld. He's got this big fancy office with some really nice chairs in it."

"A demon with an office?" questioned Phoebe. "What is he, a lawyer?"

"Oh, no," said Elbert. "He's the Director of Bureaucratic Interdimensional Procurement and Artifact Acquisitions."

"He's what?" asked Paige.

"I'm one of his assistants," said Elbert, grinning from ear to ear. "Right now I'm just a Probationary Pre-certified Clerk I. But he said if I got this book for him I'd get a real big promotion. I have the title here somewhere. Gee, I guess that won't happen now."

"Wait a second," said Piper. "Those are some awfully fancy titles for demons. They sound like some of those titles for people at city hall. They almost sound like…."

Her voice trailed off as the realization sunk in. At almost the same instant Phoebe and Paige made the same realization.

"Bureaucracy demons," gasped the three sisters in unison.