Sara released her hold on Grissom as he jumped away from her. The startled look along with the tears on his face made her take a step back. She had never seen him cry before and she wasn't sure if she liked it. Some women liked a man to be emotional and sentimental but for Grissom to cry, well, she didn't have a good feeling about it. "Gil, what's wrong? Did something happen while I was gone? Did someone call?" As she said the last, she stepped closer to him, but he backed away a couple of steps.
"No." He turned and looked away toward the yard again. He hadn't wanted her to see him like that. "Nothing happened and nothing's wrong. It's nothing."
"Gil, I know something's not right. You've never shed tears over anything that I have ever seen so it has to be something." Sara wanted to soothe whatever it was away but knew he really should talk about it. What happened after I left? She thought as she recalled the photo albums on the coffee table that she saw when she came back in. She took a step closer. He didn't turn but he also didn't back away this time. "Was it something with the pictures?"
Her question startled him. She really is a great investigator. He thought. Communication, it was the hard part of their relationship or un-relationship. He could drown in the flood of thoughts that statement evoked. Truth was what was needed here and he wasn't good at letting his feelings out but truth would have to be the way to go. "Yes. I really hate myself at the moment."
"Why?" Sara whispered the question as she reached out and rubbed his back and tried to look around and up at his face. She knew those photos backwards and forwards and had to wonder what would bring this on. They were very endearing. Oh. That's it. He wasn't there for those photos much less those times. She really didn't know what to say, but she knew she had to try. "Gil, you didn't know. I made the decision to keep it from you. You shouldn't blame yourself. If anyone, you should be blaming me."
He turned and looked intently at her face then he cupped it in his hands and looked deeply into her eyes. "No. I was the one who said I didn't want children. If I hadn't been so self-absorbed at that moment, I would have thought about why you called. If I had even vaguely recalled that a couple of months before we had been together on such a special night I might have considered talking to you more, but no, I was so full of self-pity at the moment. It isn't your fault."
Sara could only look into his eyes. She had to somehow get him to understand. "We both made quick decisions in our life that we now have to face the repercussions of. But what really matters is what we do from here on out. You now know about Laredo and will have so many more years with her."
Grissom remained silent but he acknowledged her words with a nod of his head. She reached up and ran her fingers through his hair above his ear. "I have several videos of Laredo including her birth, her first steps amongst other things. Do you want to watch those tonight? Laredo always likes to watch them."
He looked at her and leaned down to touch his forehead to hers. "I would really enjoy that. I wanted to ask something of you too."
"Yes. What is it?"
"There was a picture of you. The one when you were still pregnant and you're standing in the nursery with a nightgown on and looking at your belly and rubbing it." Grissom watched to see the flash of recognition in her eyes. "Can I have that one?"
Sara smiled. He's such a sweet man. She stepped a little closer and Grissom placed his hands on her waist and pulled her against him. "Yes, you can have it, but may I ask what you are going to do with it?"
"I, well, I was going to put it on my desk at work." Grissom grinned. He felt so foolish, but knew how it must sound to her. He was right though, because when he said it she kissed him. It wasn't a fully passionate kiss but a tender and endearing one.
"I should go make something for dinner."
Grissom pulled her back as she tried to step away. "Why don't we order in? That way we'll have more time for the videos. I have to leave in the morning, so we will only have tonight."
"Okay, it's a date. But, Gil…we don't only have tonight. We have the rest of our lives." Sara kissed him again and left him standing there speechless.
How does she do that?
They walked back into the bedroom and then checked in on Laredo. She had shifted in her sleep since Sara had last checked on her. Sara walked over to her and saw that Laredo wasn't really asleep, so she poked her in the ribs and caused her to start giggling. "I thought so, you little cricket. I think Daddy will just have to come over here and tickle you some more," that made her giggle even more. Grissom walked over and leaned down and kissed her on her neck and let his whiskers and hair tickle her. Laredo writhed in laughter underneath his chin but then she started hiccupping because of laughing so hard. They pulled her up from the bed and took her out into the living room.
While they waited for the deliveryman, Grissom kept Laredo busy, trying unsuccessfully to rid her of her hiccups.
Sara, meanwhile, made something for Laredo to eat and then when the deliveryman came Grissom got the food from him and put it on the table. By this time, they both noticed that Laredo's hiccups had disappeared. Laredo now had her food set in front of her as Grissom and Sara dug through the sacks to get their own.
While they ate, Laredo kept pointing at Sara's portions and called certain items 'bugs' and Sara in turn teased her about the noodles being worms which made Laredo giggle as she watched her mother eat them. Grissom, not exactly part of the fun didn't mind, he had more fun watching them and watching Laredo giggle and smile.
After they finished and put the dishes in the dishwasher, Sara got Laredo changed into pajamas and then they sat down to watch the videos. Laredo found her place on Grissom's lap and Sara curled beside him like the night before. They started out with videos of Sara at home and work during her pregnancy.
They watched the videos for about an hour and then they came to another video after Laredo was born and she was just at the crawling age. She was on a blanket as Sara, her Aunt and Shannon were having a picnic. Laredo pulled herself up on her hands and her knees and rocked back and forth like she wanted to crawl, but never did. As she was in this position, a butterfly landed on her arm and she caught sight of it and her rocking stopped. Her eyes lit up and her mouth made a little O as she began making a cooing sound at the butterfly in excitement. Then she tried to reach up and touch it but lost her balance and fell over. When she started to cry, Sara leaned down and picked her up and soothed her until she stopped. Sara talked to her about the butterfly and it almost seemed that Laredo understood as she stared intently into her mother's face. At that point, Sara looked at the camera, as she smiled and said, "I think she likes bugs just like her daddy."
After that they moved on to another video where Laredo took her first step. As they watched her pull herself up next to the sofa, Grissom glanced down at a now sleeping princess. He smiled and sighed as he smoothed a tendril of her hair away from her face. Then Sara got his attention to go back to the video. He saw Sara kneel down in front of the camera and held out a bug, a beetle, toward Laredo. She encouraged Laredo to take her first step towards her. It would only be two or three steps. Grissom leaned forward a little to catch everything about this moment. Her eyes lit up and she stepped hesitantly and wobbled like she was going to fall. Sara continued in a soothing voice to encourage her and she moved her other foot out and let go of the sofa. She reached for the bug and took another step. And just as she touched Sara's hand, Sara grabbed her other hand and steadied her as she stepped again toward the bug. She then picked Laredo up and rewarded her for her steps by showing her the bug up close. Laredo was all open-mouthed and cooing again.
Grissom rewound the video to see it again. He enjoyed this immensely and wanted to do this all night. Sara on the other hand, picked up Laredo and put her into bed. When she came back to the living room the video had progressed to the point that showed Laredo in her crib, she stared at a spot on the wall and it moved. It was a spider. She pulled herself up and stood against the railing and put her thumb in her mouth. She then saw her mommy watching her and pointed at the spider and when she took her thumb out of her mouth she puckered her mouth up into an O again and said, "ooh, ooh, Bug."
Grissom again rewound the video and watched her speak her first words. Sara had curled up next to him and watched his face intently. She wanted to remember his expression forever. She leaned forward and asked, "Do you want to see the birth now?"
Grissom turned to her and his eyes lit up as he said, "Yes." So Sara stood up and pulled out the tape and put in the other. Sara and Grissom then snuggled back up together but Sara forewarned him before starting the tape. "I want to warn you now, it was a long delivery and painful."