This Charming Man, a degrassi fanfic

On two bicycles
On a hillside desolate
Could nature make a man of me yet?

I am nothing but a face in the crowd. You, you were a basketball star. You're someone who's going to be someone. You have a great life ahead of you, yet you still insist on asking me to 'take it to the next level'. I try to say yes, but I know that if I do, I'll just hold you back. I watch as you slowly wheel away from me, a tear rolls slowly down my cheek. I feel as if I'm in some dramatic movie as I bound to my feet, running after you. I open my mouth, to yell after you but no sound comes out. I pause in the middle of the large and empty hallway. You're gone, I take in a deep breath. I haven't ran that fast in ages. I listen for the sound of your wheels, Simpson's room.

And I'm running again, running after you. To tell you that I'll just hold you back. To tell you that I shouldn't be in your life, unless it's as an acquaintance. I just want you to know that I do care for you, probably more than you could ever imagine. I slow my pace down, listening as my high tops screech softly on the freshly polished marble floor. As I almost come to a halt I slip a little, gripping Simpson's door. My cover is blown as you turn to see me fall flat. I smile lightly, your hurt face pains my heart. You put out a helping hand, and I get chills throughout my body as I accept it. I try to murmur out a 'thank you', but my voice has yet to return. Instead, you do the talking for me.

Under this charming car
This charming man

"What're you doing here?" You ask, stubbornly. I try to retort with a smart ass remark about this being my school too, but I begin to cough, uncontrollably controllably. I see the look of guilt on your face as you lightly touch the small of my back. I get the chills again, and I stand up straight your hand moving back to its former place on your lap. I motion to the classroom, and with a nod you back in, waiting for me to follow close behind. So I do, I shut the door softly behind me so that we can have privacy, I turn the lights on. Letting people know that this room is already occupied, and if they want to mack on eachother they should go into the Janitor's closet like Craig and Manny probably do.

You sigh loudly, I notice that your back is to me. It pains me to be in the same room with you after I just rejected you. But I couldn't let you leave like that, it wouldn't have been fair. We could've never talked again... and I wouldn't have been able to stand that. Because there's something that you need to know. But I can't tell you, for fear that you'll give up on your art.. I ruined your life as a basketball star, and I can't ruin your life as an artist. I would hate myself more than I do now for doing something as selfish as telling you that I...

Why ponder life's complexities
When the leather runs smooth
On the passenger seat?

You sigh loudly, and I pull up a chair in front of you. You avert your eyes, looking to the computer behind me. I sigh, and take your hand. Impulsiveness isn't my thing, and you notice my hand shaking. You slowly turn to face me, your face is sad. I clear my throat, realizing I hadn't said a word since I had told you I didn't want to take it up a level. I clear my throat again, and you shake your head, facing the other direction. I feel my hand go limp as you rest your hands in your lap again. I leave my hand on your knee, not sure if I can function properly.

"Ji.. Jimmy, I.. I'm sorry, but I just don't want to ruin your life." I nod slowly, as you turn to face me. The look in your eyes had gone from hurt, to frustrated. You remind me of Craig, and that does it. I break, I break down into tears. You reminded me of Craig, was that the only reason that I had hung out with you? Do I just think I love you, or do I really love him? But I know in a split second what the answer to that question was. It was, what it had always been.

I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said it's crucial
That someone so handsome should care

You take my hand fiercely, and you grip it with the strength that I always knew that you had. With your other hand you lightly lift my chin. Our lips are only inches apart. I feel my lips quiver, and you softly touch your finger to my lips, as if to say 'Don't say a word'. I nod lightly, and you lightly clasp your hands around both of mine. You shake your head softly, murmuring something to yourself before looking at me.

"Ellie, you can't ruin my life.. You can't.. I obviously want you in my life.. You're beautiful, gorgeous, nice, sweet, loving.." You trail off, and I nod lightly, still not saying anything as you asked me to. I sniffle in lightly, and you look me in the eye. I take in a gulp, wondering if it was again my turn to talk. You nod lightly, keeping our hands clasped tightly together.

Ah ! I'm just a country boy
Who never knew his place
He said return the ring
He knows so much about these things
He knows so much about these things

We talk, for almost an hour. I explain to you that if I were to be your girl friend I would be holding you back. That you wouldn't exactly have your own choice of schools to goto when you graduate, I try to explain everything from my perspective, but you have a reason why nothing will go wrong with every excuse. Finally, it has come down to the one moment that could define the rest of our lives. In this one moment, we could know each other forever, or well.. We could go our separate ways, talking constantly before slowly loosing touch. That's how it goes, isn't it? I know it, and I know that you know it.

The moment of truth approaches, I only have a few minutes before Ashley comes looking for the both of us. I gulp in, I can't tell you. It would just ruin your life. Yet I try, I try to get the words out of my mouth. I feel my throat tighten up. You were wheeling around the room. Sighing lightly every so often. I slowly pull myself up to a computer, logging on. Sending you a message that you would hopefully receive at the beginning of the next term. I shut the window quickly, not saving, or sending, my message to you. You ask me what I was typing, and I shrug. You shake your head at me, and wheel off toward the door again. Leaving me in the bright Media Immersion room, alone.

I would go out tonight
But I haven't got a stitch to wear
This man said it's crucial
That someone so handsome should care
La, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man ...
La, la-la, la-la, la-la, this charming man ...

And I'm running, again. I'm running for you. I look everywhere, I run from class room to class room. I run throughout the entire cafeteria. I go everywhere but the roof. I look at the steps, and remember that you couldn't get up them on your own, anyways. But I hear your wheels, and duck quickly into a closet. I hear your wheels, and her heels. I gulp lightly, and step out of the closet lightly as I see you wheel off with Ashley. I get a pain in my heart, and slowly close the door, following the two of you silently.

I keep my mouth shut, and I keep my distance. If there's anything I don't want you to know, it's that I'm here. I listen to your conversation, about me. You tell her how much you wanted to tell me how you felt. You tell her that you just wish that I could understand something for a change. Thats when she leaves you. I wasn't paying enough attention, and you end up turning to see me. I smile lightly and murmur 'Surprise'.

"Did you hear all of that?" You ask. I nod. You sigh, I sigh. You look at me, and I at you.

"Ellie, do you love me?" You ask, I look bewildered. You raise a brow, I nod. You smile lightly, I smile brightly.

"Jimmy, do you love me?" I ask, kicking my foot on the ground as if it were dirt. You nod, I smile. You motion me over, and I obey. You motion for me to lean down to you, and I do. We kiss. The moment that we had in the garage wasn't just nothing. I guess I can't ruin your life, afterall.

This Charming Man