A/N Thank you all so much for the wonderful reviews. Special thanks to pocoloco for her ideas on this chapter and inspiration from inneedofcoffee for one of the scenes. You are all great!

Chapter 3

"So what's next?" Jackie asked looking around the room.

"First, probably should be the physicals. We need to get a baseline on everybody who goes offworld," Sam answered.

Jack looked over to Sam. "Do we tell Doc who her latest patient is ahead of time or do we surprise her along with everybody else?"

Daniel spoke up. "I don't know about you, but if it were me, I"d want to remember that Janet doesn't like surprises and think of how painful your next physical could be."

"Good point." Jack stepped over to the phone and dialed the extension for the infirmary office. "Hi Doc! We've got some VIPs coming up for their baseline physicals. . . .Aaahh, you might want to know who it is. . . . No, it's not the President. This person is much more recognizable. Well one of them is. . . Jackie Chan. . . And a few of his stunt crew. . . . I swear, Doc, this is not a practical joke. . . See ya soon!" Jack turned to the others. "Yep! She thinks it's a joke." His tone was vastly ironic.

Major Davis seemed to sense an infamous Daniel/Jack argument brewing and chimed in. "Gentlemen, why don't we make our way to the infirmary while SG-1 schedules the rest of your training for going offworld."

"Oh no! We'll get the training scheduled, but we get to see Doc's face when these four show up."

General Hammond's face was a cross between a scowl and outrageous laughter. Funny, you'd never think to see both on one persons face.

The nine people made their way to the infirmary. Jack grumbled the whole way. Something about nobody believing him even when he was telling the gospel truth.

"It's your own fault, Sir. Everybody knows how much you like to play pranks on everybody here on base. If it weren't for these unusual circumstances, Jackie here wouldn't ever be allowed in the mountain." Jack smirked. There went Carter again with respectful insubordination.

Amazingly, it was only the SF's maintained a modicum of professionalism. It seemed that everyone else was unable to contain their shock. Aliens of every shape and size could - and had - stroll down the halls. One innocent human? The SGC was in an uproar.

They strolled through the infirmary doors to see Janet waiting for her new patients. "Janet Frasier, meet you new patients. This is Hsing, Chi, Wing, and Jackie. Gentlemen, this is our beloved Doctor Frasier." Janet glared at Jack. "What?"

"Sucking up will not work Colonel O'Neill. I still have the needles." Jack paled slightly at the thought of the various needles she could use.

"Doc, what did I do? I told you! Jackie Chan! 'Sides, what ever happened to 'first do no harm'?"

"Oh, but I won't be causing harm. I'll be performing necessary medical tests." Janet's face was smug and just a touch evil.

Jack pinned Daniel with a look. "You knew this would happen, didn't you?"

Daniel didn't bother to try to look sheepish or guilty. "Pretty much, Jack."

Jack stalked out of the infirmary. Once he was finally out of the room the other SGC members burst out laughing.

Teal'c (for him) was grinning broadly. It was not often they played a trick so well on his Taur'i brother.

That afternoon, "the new" SG-1, both charter and recent members of the combatants as well as the celebrity members found themselves in the SGC firing range. The weapons master, MSG Penhall, looked up to see SG-1 at their regularly scheduled time. Well, while they were onworld that is.

"It's good to see you Colonel, Major, Dr. Jackson, Teal'c, Mr. Quinn. Who are our visitors?"

Jonas's easy smile was firmly in place. "Hey Steve, we've got a few people here that need to qualify on all the usual weapons." Jonas had gotten to know the tough sergeant fairly well over the past year and more. "This is Jackie, Hsing, Chi, and Wing. They've been recruited as consultants. I hear they're pretty good shots on the 9mil. They need to qualify on the P90, the zat, and staff weapon as well. They're going offworld."

Jack, being qualified as Master Instructor, showed a remarkable amount of patience in instructing the newer members of SG-1 on the Earth weapons. Teal'c patiently demonstrated the goa'uld weapons. Sam, Daniel, and Jonas simply tried to stay out of the way and practice with their own weapons.

Jonas was excited. Ever since they got back from the planet and Teal'c explained who Jackie Chan was, he'd been positively bouncing. He was "supposedly" practicing with a 9 mil when he heard Teal'c encouraging Jackie with the zat-ni-kitel in the next lane. Zats were at once very easy and very difficult. The energy expended from one tended to be drawn to the person they were being aimed at. Yet, the wave effect made it difficult for one who was not familiar with them to be sure where to aim. Jonas bounced up behind Jackie and Teal'c to see if there were any other pointers he could possibly get. At the last possible moment, however, he tripped on his own feet and fell into Jackie. Jackie was just squeezing off a shot with the zat, which of course, went wide. It was like a train wreck. Jonas couldn't help looking where the shot went to and yet, he didn't want to know.

Sure enough, he followed the beam over to . . . Jack. Colonel O'Neill. His team leader. The one he spent so long trying to impress to be allowed on SG-1.

What was it that Daniel said was one of Oma's sayings? "If you immediately know the candle is burning, then the meal was already cooked." Yeah, well, his goose was well and truly cooked, to borrow from an Earth phrase.

Jack was ticked. No, not ticked, Jack was peeved. He was angry. He was mad. He was annoyed. And he was irritated. He hated getting zatted. After a moment of writhing agony, he sat up. "Who did that?" There was an unholy fire in his eyes.

Jonas gulped. This was a side of Colonel O'Neill that he knew was there but very seldom saw. And he hadn't seen it directed toward himself since the days after Daniel "died". It was a look that promised not death, but pain. He'd better get it over with. "That would be my fault, Colonel. I tripped and knocked Jackie off balance at a critical moment."

Jack took a deep breath and considered how far along his young teammate had come in the year and a half he'd known him. It didn't seem to him as if his young friend had come up against any adversity before the whole naquadria bomb thing. He refused to think of it as the time that Daniel "died". He seemed to be getting by on his open personality and academic brilliance. Not bad in and of itself, but he hadn't been truly tested. Now, even with facing what must seem to him to be a fate worse than death, he accepted his responsibility. Hot damn! He was proud of the younger man and proud to have had a part in Jonas's growth.

Still glowering, although most of it was fake, "We'll talk about this later. You have my promise."

Jonas was cringing on the inside. "Yes, sir."

Jackie was watching the whole exchange. 'Glad he's not mad at me.' was the first thought through his head. After a moment, he saw the colonel get over his anger. Jonas Quinn must not have noticed because he still looked like he was going to be in a world of trouble. Jackie decided that he would like working with this mecurical man.

A/N As always, please review. Pretty please!