Hazards of Christmas
Relena's fainting breaking the moment Wufei and Noin watched Heero carry her off silently then looked at each other with a combination of shock, humor and passion still present. "Looks like my plan pretty much failed." Noin said breathlessly, leaning her forehead against his as she smiled at him dreamily. "Now pretty much everyone knows BUT Milliardo."
"She's going to be out for my blood now that she knows I'm the one that stole you away." Wufei commented, wondering just what the pacifist was going to come up with. Knowing her the worst she would do is the silent treatment or constant lectures and speeches. He could only hope for the first. Absently thinking that anyone could follow in Heero and Relena's footsteps and walk in Wufei knew he should tell her to get out of his lap but he didn't want to. He liked her just where she was. "So care to tell me what led to you running in here like that during work hours when anyone could see you?"
"Wo ai ni." Noin said confidently, watching the color leave his face then return full force with added red. "I got a translation and I'm returning the sentiment, you stupid idiot."
"You...?" Wufei managed to get out, not even hearing the you stupid idiot part.
"Only you would confess that in a language I couldn't understand. Were you going to keep quiet about it until I learned enough Chinese to translate it myself?" Noin wanted to know, lowering her head to rest it on his shoulder, her arms wrapped around his neck. She should likely be mad at him, would probably get mad at him later in fact. But right at that moment, she was just too happy that he loved her to be anything but happy.
"Well I should be given points for originality then." Wufei said with a hesitant smile as he wrapped his arms around her waist. "And we really need to get up before someone comes in here and gets the shock of their life. I don't care who it is, you're doing the CPR."
"I love you, Chang Wufei."
"I love you too." Wufei said as he turned to place a kiss on her head. What the hell. Let someone come in.
)
Tired, frustrated and annoyed Wufei was perilously close to just throwing his hands into the air and saying to hell with it a few days later. If there was one thing he hated it was shopping for other people, especially for a special occasion. It was bad enough when it was just one person to shop for but thanks to stupid people you had to get all the people in your life presents for Christmas, the industrial and commercial bastards' favorite day of the year. Whoever had come up with that brilliant idea deserved to be dragged out into the snow and left to die of exposure, Wufei thought darkly as he glared at his reflection in a store window. A tradition likely created by blood sucking store owners more concerned with making a profit then the mental well being of their fellow man. In other words here he was and he had no idea what to do. This of course happened every year but it just got worse as the years went by. Now, just to add insult to the injury, he had to find a present for Lucrezia and it had to be a good one. He hadn't a clue what he should get though. Clothes were out because not only did he not know her sizes but he somehow couldn't see their tastes being similar in that area. That and he didn't want to be seen shopping for girls clothes. He'd considered perfume or something girlie like that but none of the stuff smelled right for her and several of them had given him a headache even from a safe distance. Then he'd thought maybe a book but he had no idea what book to get her and he already knew they didn't share that interest to the same degree. Jewelry? Gift certificate? chocolate? What the hell was he supposed to get her? Maybe he should have just broken down and asked Sally to come with him, Wufei thought dejectedly. Girls always seemed to know what to buy. Sally had already rubbed in that she was done her shopping. But if he'd asked for her help he'd owe her, plus he had a feeling she was still sorta mad about the whole secret thing. He was on his own for the moment and even if he did figure something out there were more people on his list. What was he going to do?
)
Two hours later Wufei sat down on a bench, totally exhausted and completely discouraged. He'd managed to find something for Sally, Quatre and Trowa but he still had plenty more where they came from plus Lucrezia. Damn it but what was he supposed to do?
"You look like a little boy who's just been informed that there really isn't a Santa Claus." A female voice said as she sat down beside him, smiling at him as she turned her head to meet his gaze. "No offense."
"None taken." Wufei said, scanning her profile to try and put a name to the face. It wasn't that she looked familiar but she was smiling at him like she knew him. She wasn't someone one would forget thought with long black hair that likely reached her waist when loose, exotic, almond shaped emerald green eyes and a very nice figure. No, he had no idea who she was.
"So Christmas shopping huh? My brothers tend to look like traumatized war victims whenever they have to drag themselves off shopping to get their presents." The woman said with a smirk, the idea obviously amusing her. "Me, I view it like a battle. You need to consider your opponents, know them inside and out then hit them with the thing they want or need the most. I even write it down, their name then at least five different things I can get for them. In and out of these crowded hell holes in an hour or less."
"You don't like shopping?" Wufei asked in surprise, never having met a woman who didn't like to come to these places and blow their hard earned money on often useless things.
"Hell no. Huge crowds, kids throwing more fits then usual, annoying clerks and thousands of useless stuff every where you look." The woman said with a mock shudder. "Give me a knife fight in a dark alley any day. At least no one's perky or trying to make you dish out half your bank account for something that can't possibly be worth that much."
)
"Exactly." Wufei said with gusto, so pleased to finally meet someone who saw all this the way he did. "Chang Wufei." Wufei added as he held his hand out to her.
"Alexis." Alexis replied, deliberately leaving out her last name, just in case he'd heard of her. It was doubtful but why test fate as her mother always said. "So how many people do you have left to shop for, Wufei?"
"Too many. I have no idea what to get any of them either, especially Lucrezia." Wufei said with a sigh, easily picturing what it would be like if he didn't come up with something good in that area. He'd be in the dog house with Patch for Christmas, no question.
"Your girlfriend? Sister?" Alexis asked with a questioning look on her face though she knew exactly who he was referring to. She'd gotten quite the earful about the whole thing in fact. "Family friend?"
"Girlfriend, our first Christmas as a couple. My best friend Sally told me that if I screw this up I can count on it being our one and only Christmas together." Wufei said with a close to miserable look on his face. "And I just know if I ask for help from any of my female friends they'll either tell me what they want or tell me I should pick it out myself. Easy for them to say."
"Well I'll tell you what, Wufei. My idiot brother was supposed to be meeting me here a half an hour ago but he called just before I came over here to tell me he was going to be two hours late. He was supposed to be buying me lunch and now that's definitely not going to happen so how about a compromise. In the spirit of Christmas as it's supposed to be I'll help you do your shopping and you buy me lunch. Deal?"
"You'd help me?" Wufei said as he sent her a look of complete and total gratitude, hope coming into his tired eyes. "Really?"
"Sure. Deal then?" Alexis said as she held out her hand, imagining that the next hour or so was going to be interesting to say the least. And here she'd thought she was going to have to stick around this annoying place with a book or something. This was definitely going to be more interesting.
"Deal." Wufei said as he shook her hand. "You might have just saved my life."
"No problem. Glad to help a fellow shopping hater."
)
"Okay, I think that's everyone right?" Alexis said as she slumped into a bench, unbelievably worn out. Since she only had family really to give presents to it was an interesting experience to have to shop for family and for a load of friends. No wonder people in malls looked like small, terrified animals about to be run over come Christmas time, she thought with a sigh.
"Yes. Thank you God, Buddha, Mohammed and every other god, goddess and deity known to mankind and even those we don't." Wufei said as he set down a huge collection of bags beside the bench before flopping down beside her. "Next year it's gift certificates all the way. To hell with it being impersonal."
"Sounds like a good plan to me." Alexis agreed, patting him companionably on the shoulder. "But at least you're good until Valentines Day."
"Don't even mention that please." Wufei said with a shake of his head, getting a headache just thinking about it. "At least I've done Christmas shopping before. I've never even had to buy a Valentine in my whole life."
"Never?"
"Well I've had to buy some chocolate so that Sally wouldn't try to hurt me but otherwise no. Not that I remember anyway."
)
"Ouch, you poor man. Expectations are even higher on a gift from Valentines Day since it's the day set aside for lovers. You better start planning as soon as Christmas is over." Alexis said, biting her lip to keep from laughing at the panicky look on his face. "But I'm sure you'll do fine. Plus you could always get her something else that we looked at before."
"That's true. Anyway I have to get going, I'm supposed to drop in on Quatre and help him translate some stuff." Wufei said after he'd glanced at his watch, amazed and slightly horrified at how much time he'd spent trapped in this hell hole. "Thank you very much for your help, Alexis. I couldn't have done it without you." Wufei added as he held out his hand, shaking hers. "I hope we meet up again."
"I'm sure we will." Alexis said as she let his hand go. "And thank you for the lunch, it was pretty good for food court fare. I hope everyone likes their presents."
"For once I'm pretty sure that they will. You're really good at figuring out what someone would want even from the vague descriptions I gave you. If I didn't know better I'd say you knew them better then I did." Wufei said with a smile as he stood up and collected all the bags, bowing slightly to show his thanks. "Thank you again."
"You're welcome." Alexis said with a bow of her head, waving him off before getting to her own feet. Her three packages in her hands she headed off into the craziness of the mall to return to the fountain where she'd arranged to meet her brother earlier. Boy was she ever going to have a story to tell him when the idiot finally got there. Talk about your unexpected coincidences. Imagine meeting Chang Wufei in a mall during Christmas rush.
)
"WUFEI!" Duo thundered as he came into the room looking down right murderous as his blue eyes flashed dangerously in Wufei's direction. Everyone was over at the boys' house for dinner and since everyone was there, there were several people who either sent Wufei sympathetic looks or a what did you do now look.
"Whatever it is I didn't do it." Wufei said automatically, borrowing one of Duo's favorite responses whenever he was in trouble and knew it too. What and he done or forgot to do, Wufei wondered as he watched his friend stomp over to him with a killer look in his eyes.
"What's wrong, Duo?" Noin wanted to know from Wufei's side on the couch, looking back and forth between the two friends. Wufei hadn't mentioned a fight or anything. Duo looked pretty upset too.
"Where were you yesterday at around three o'clock in the afternoon?" Duo demanded as he came to a stop in front of Wufei, his hands on his hips which was always a bad sign. A very bad sign and his ribs weren't completely back to normal yet either.
"Christmas shopping." Wufei said wearily, not seeing where this was going. He'd even told Lucrezia and Sally he was planning on doing most of his shopping that weekend. If Duo had needed to find him he'd have only had to call either of them or his own cell.
"And did you do this shopping by yourself or did you have help?" Duo continued, his eyes just daring him to say something he wouldn't like so that he could squash him like a bug.
"For some of it I was by myself and I was shopping with someone else for the last bit." Wufei replied slowly, completely out to sea about where he was going with this. Had something happened and he hadn't known about it?
)
"And who did you shop with for half the time?" Duo demanded to know, thrown off by the fact that he'd admitted it so readily like it was no big deal.
"Alexis."
"Alexis?" Noin asked with a raised eyebrow, not recognizing the name at all. "Do I know her? What's her last name?"
"I don't think you know her, at least she didn't mention knowing you." Wufei said with a shake of his head, starting to really get stressed out since he had no idea what the hell was going on. Had Duo found out what he'd gotten for him for Christmas and was mad? And come to think of it..had Alexis told him her last name? Thinking over their various conversations he was surprised to realize he was nearly a hundred percent sure she hadn't. "I don't know her last name."
"You went shopping with someone and you didn't even know her last name?" Duo said with a raised eyebrow, not believing it for a minute. "A young woman described as a cross between a sexy gypsy and a pin up girl? With legs that seemed to go on for miles and a body that could grace the cover of Playboy any day. Sound familiar?"
"Her legs aren't that long."
"WUFEI!"
"Oh boy, here we go." Quatre muttered, ready to run for cover should the need arise. This could get really messy.
"What, they weren't or at least I don't think they were. I was there to buy Christmas presents, not check out her legs." Wufei huffed then slowly seeing the light Wufei looked over at Noin and unable to read her face hurried to explain. Oh damn but he could be in serious trouble and she hadn't even seen her present yet. "I just met her in the mall and she offered to help me with my shopping since I was clueless and she had time to spare. And for that matter, Duo, if you were there why didn't you come over and say hello? Then you wouldn't be making such a huge fuss about all this."
)
"I wasn't there." Duo huffed though she was starting to feel a little foolish now. "I heard some guys talking about you two and how they saw you coming out of the jewelry store with some bombshell and I kinda saw red. I'm sorry."
"That good looking?" Noin asked as she looked over at Wufei questioningly, not worried but enjoying keeping him in the hot seat for the heck of it. She knew that he loved her and would never cheat on her with some girl even if she was some bombshell blonde or whatever. But she was going to let him squirm a bit more before she let him off the hook. Just for his future reference.
"No comment." Wufei grumbled, crossing his arms in front of his chest as he chose to ignore both of them. He wasn't going to let them draw him into this argument.
"Well did you at least get her phone number?" Hilde asked teasingly asked now that she and the rest of the guys were pretty sure it was safe to say something.
"No I did not. She doesn't even live near here. Her family owns a ranch in Canada and she was going home today anyway after visiting her brother." Wufei replied with a dark look in Hilde's direction, already thinking of ways to pay Duo's girl back for saying something like that. If she got the girls stirred up again then Hilde was definitely in for it.
"Well supper should be almost ready." Quatre said quietly before anything else was said. "So lets all head in and eat before anything gets burnt or cold."
)
Christmas soon arrived and on the twenty third Noin and Wufei boarded a plane to Rome where they would pick up his grandmother and then head off on the train to Noin's house to spend Christmas with her family. It was sure to be an interesting week.