First off, WOW!!!
We definitely didn't expect this many reviews. Usually we get two or three
a chapter, if we're lucky. So here's a shout-out to all who reviewed:
Tashy911: Thanks. know what? I get that a lot. If you're scared now, you'll be terrified after this chapter...
*
Queen of All Chipmunks: Hmm.do you know my sister? Because she claims her chinchilla, Darby (imaginary, of course. Just don't tell her that) is the mistress of all hairless monkeys...yeah, I'm looking into getting her professional help. Soon. Don't worry. No need to rule over all the chipmunks to get me to update. Doing it right now. Thanks for reviewing.
*
xo-Kagome-ox: Glad I made you laugh. That is the main mission of this fanfic. To bring a smile to all who come across it. (and to scare the pants off all who come across it too.) Thanks for your review. Always appreciated.
*
Tache: Thanks. How did what happen? Sango singing? The idea of this fanfic? My sister deciding it was OK to have an imaginary pet chinchilla named Darby? What? Well, you can answer my questions next time you review (which will be right after you read this chapter. Right?)
*
Kenny: Much love and gratitude! This story is gonna be comprised of mostly songs from Disney movies, although, if I see fit, some will be from non- Disney movies. Not often, but sometimes.
*
Megami no Nekura: What's in the water I'm drinking...I am not at liberty to discuss the contents of my drinking beverages. *whispers loudly to her screen* The freakin FBI has got my computer bugged! They're still trying to find me after the Tijuana incident.
*
Wizogirl192003: OK. Will do.
*
*
*
Alright, now that that's out of the way-
Saffron Spice: Hey, I wanna say something.
Shiroryu: Back off!
Saffron Spice: This is a CO-AUTHORED fic.
Shiroryu: Yeah, but I'M the one that does the authoring part1
Saffron Spice: Just lemme say something.
Shiroryu: You have two minutes.
Saffron Spice: Hey everyone! Just wanna thank everyone for reviewing-
Shiroryu: I ALREADY did that!
Saffron Spice: Hey. You said two minutes!
Shiroryu: *grumbles* Fine
Saffron Spice: To the Queen of All Chipmunks- You are so cool for understanding our obligation to rule over the rodents. I KNEW there were others like me.
Shiroryu: hey, don't insult the reviewer! She won't come back!
Saffron Spice: Whatever. Let's just get on with the story.
Shiroryu: Fine by me.
~*~
Disclaimer: Inuyasha is not ours. Neither is the song we used in this chapter. They belong to Rumiko Takahashi and Disney. Back off.
~*~
"What is going on?" Kagome asked herself as she followed the obviously so- far-out-of-her-mind-she'll-have-trouble-relocating-her-senses-anytime-soon Sango and the oblivious-to-the-world-crashing-around-his-very-ears Shippo.
"Whatcha say Kagome?" Sango asked.
"Huh? Oh, nothing." Kagome said, a little startled. Was this all a dream? No. her head still hurt as if it was used as a wrecking ball. So what was going on? As they reached Kaede's hut, Kagome felt herself relax a bit. Hey, she liked singing in the shower, so what was the matter with Sango singing in the village?
And dancing.
With all the villagers watching.
And singing
And dancing.
In unison.
And in French.
Suddenly, Kagome didn't feel so relaxed anymore.
They got to the hut and had just stepped inside when they heard Inuyasha and Miroku coming.
"Hey guys!" Sango greeted cheerfully. She went back outside to talk to them, while Kagome stayed behind. She was still heated about hers and Inuyasha's conversation the night before. If her memory served her correctly, he had said something along the lines of "She was old, so you knew she was gonna keel over soon." In response to hearing about her grandmother's death. True, she had only met her grandmother once, but still! That was just cold-hearted. How could you speak about someone's relative like that? All for that stupid jewel again! The one that basically ruled her pitiful existence she fondly christened her life.
"Oh come on Kagome! Are you still mad?" Inuyasha asked. He got a very icy glare as a reply.
"I would take that as a yes, Inuyasha." Miroku said.
"I can work that out for myself, Monk!" he said irritated.
"So are you gonna work this out? We can't very well go around looking for the shards with Kagome still angry with you, can we?"
"How do you suppose I talk to her when she won't answer?"
"You're not trying hard enough."
"Look, why don't you try and make the stubborn cow listen, and I give you the lame advice?"
"SIT!"
WHOOSH
BAM
THUD
"Ugh!"
"YOU KNOW, I'M FREAKIN STANDING RIGHT HERE, YOU INSENSITIVE JERK!"
Kagome stomped off into the woods to clear her head. She looked like she was headed toward the bone-eater's well. "She's probably going home." Sango commented. Miroku nodded in agreement.
"Let's go see if we can catch up to her before she goes, OK Shippo?" Sango asked the little fox demon.
"Sure."
While they were walking away, Sango muttered discreetly to Miroku "Will you please try and get Inuyasha to stop being such an idiot?" "I try everyday of my life." He rolled his eyes. Sango shrugged and carried on walking. Miroku kneeled on the ground to talk to his thickheaded friend.
"You know, you really have to stop doing that." He commented.
"HWERT WHOS, MEERAWU!!!" Inuyasha yelled into the dirt.
"Didn't catch that. Don't speak stupid."
Inuyasha finally lifted his head out of the earth, "Why I oughta-"
"Will you just shut up?" Miroku smashed his staff between Inuyasha's eyes to get his attention.
"I know I'll pay for that one later." He thought. While Inuyasha was incapacitated, Miroku decided that that was the opportune time to get the stubborn idiot to listen.
He was wrong.
"You know, you're not all that tough, once you get to know you."
"Gonna kill you Monk." Inuyasha mumbled.
"I think you just worry too much."
"Smash you into the 30 nearest trees."
"If you were to just relax a little, I think you could act like a decent person."
"Light your body aflame. That'll be fun."
"Inuyasha, are you even listening to me?" Miroku asked, a bit on the frustrated side.
"Nope. I'm planning your death. Don't worry, it'll be long and painful.Hmm, never mind. I guess a long and painful death would give one cause to worry. Sucks to be you."
"I suppose. Before you slay me, why don't you just pay attention to what I'm saying for a minute."
"Talk." Inuyasha sighed. He tuned in while he sharpened his claws on a nearby rock. What? He had to be ready for when the Monk stopped talking, right?
"You worry too much." Miroku stated.
"Huh?" That one took the half dog demon for a loop. He'd never heard that one before.
"You worry too much." Miroku reiterated. "I think if you just loosened up, you'd be a nicer person."
"Where are you going with this, Monk?" Inuyasha asked suspiciously.
"I thought you'd never ask." Miroku stood up and turned his back to Inuyasha. Suddenly, everything went dark, even though it wasn't even noon yet. Then, a bright light from out of nowhere shined down on Miroku. He turned only his head back towards Inuyasha and said...
"Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata!!!"
He whirled around and started to snap his fingers to the suddenly existent beat of music. Inuyasha's eyes widen in terror as he watched the Monk dance toward him.(If you've ever seen Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and have seen Carlton dance, then you know why Inuyasha is so scared.)
"When I was a cool young one,
I worked in the colony, paid my dues
Accepted without question of prevailing views
The young man life was one more ride"
"Oh my god." Inuyasha muttered. Miroku had lost it, completely. Why on earth was he singing and dancing?!?!?!
TO HIM!!!
"Digging holes, standing guard
Didn't cross my mind!
I was wrong
All along
All that I needed
Was to have heeded..."
Inuyasha could feel tears welling up in his eyes as Miroku threw off his Monk robes to reveal tight black leather pants and a sparkly red, half way buttoned, long baggy-sleeved disco shirt (Ricky Martin wannabe? Oh yeah...)
"Hakuna Matata!
What a wonderful phrase!
Hakuna Matata
Ain't no passing craze."
"WHAT ON EARTH IS HAKUNA MATATA! AND WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE GOD-AWFUL CLOTHES?!?!?" Inuyasha cried, covering his now very un-virgin eyes.
"It means no worries
For the rest of your days!
It's my problem free
Philosophy
Hakuna Matata!"
"I've had enough. I am so outta here!" Inuyasha shouted. "There's gotta be something in the water." He grumbled as he got up to leave. That's when Miroku threw his staff right at Inuyasha's feet. In a matter of 10 seconds, Inuyasha tripped, Miroku miraculously found rope, and tied our doggie-eared friend up tighter than a convict in a Texas prison (no offense to any one in Texas) to a tree, slapped an anti-demon spell on the rope so he couldn't get out, and gagged him.
And then Miroku, to add to Inuyasha's contaminated memory that will haunt him for the rest of his life, did the Electric Slide.
Yes, friends, the Electric Slide.
Oh the horror.
"AAAGGGHHH!!!" Inuyasha screamed into his gag. He never thought he would die this way. He always imagined lots of blood, and swords, and other violent crap like that. Not his best friend in a shiny shirt dancing like a pansy. Where the heck did he learn to do that? And for the love of the Shikon no Tama, WHERE THE HECK WAS THAT MUSIC COMING FROM?!?!?!
"When I was a shallow youth
I yadda yadda for perfection
I was never no good
Yadda yadda yadda
"What, you don't know all the lines?" Inuyasha tried to say. But since he had the gag in his mouth, it came out as "Moh, woo whon oo aww ba wines?" Apparently, Miroku didn't care. So he just carried on.
"I put my best foot forward
while the other one stood still
Take my word
I have heard
All that I needed
Was to have heeded..."
Miroku spun around, kicking his feet up every so often. He did moves I can't even describe to you, my friends. Poor Inuyasha will never look at him the same way again.
"Hakuna Matata!
What a wonderful phrase.
Hakuna Matata
Ain't no passing craze.
It means no worries
For the rest of your days!
It's my problem free
Philosophy!
Hakuna Ma-"
"Miroku?" someone called from a little ways away. Just then, the music stopped, the sun decided to shine on more than our unpredictable friend, and Miroku's regular clothes were on.
"Miroku?" Sango called as she stepped into the clearing the two boys were in with Shippo on her shoulder. Everything looked normal. Miroku was meditating, the birds were singing, and Inuyasha was...
Inuyasha was tied to a tree.
OK, maybe normal wasn't the correct word.
Sango looked at Inuyasha for a minute, saw his plead for help in his eyes, wondered what on earth happened to the poor boy and.
Kept walking.
Peaceful.
THAT was the correct word.
Sango knew she'd pay for that one later, but could you really blame her? Peace and quiet was not common in that part of the village. If it wasn't Kagome and Inuyasha fighting, it was Miroku and Inuyasha fighting. The girl just wanted some time to think. And Inuyasha tied and gagged to a tree would help significantly.
"Umm...Miroku?" Sango asked before she stepped into the hut.
"Yes Sango?" he cracked open one eye, so as not to disturb his "meditating"
"Kagome went back to her own time before I could catch her."
"Oh, alright."
Sango went inside the hut. About 2 minutes later she stuck her head outside again.
"Hey, Miroku?"
"Yes Sango?"
"Was it hard to get Inuyasha tied up like that?"
"No, not really."
"Then could you do it more often, please?"
"WHEY!!!" Inuyasha grunted.
"Sure." Miroku answered.
Sango smiled and went back inside, leaving Miroku to his meditating and Inuyasha to his tree, never guessing what had taken place only 5 minutes previous. Had she known, maybe she wouldn't have teased Inuyasha about his sudden case of twitchy eyes.
Especially common when Miroku was around.
Those boys were a little too weird to figure out.
END OF CHAPTER 3
*
Ok, I'm sure you've all noticed by now that this was not the original song sung in the Lion King. Honestly, this just went better with the direction of this fic. Plus I highly doubt Miroku would be singing about when he was "a young wart hog" and his little "problem": That was just too much for my poor little brain to handle. Anyways, hit that button that says 'Submit Review' and we'll all be happy campers. By the way, Guess what! I just turned 16! (Whoo-hoo! My birthday was Saturday. I'm gonna actually start driving soon
Saffron Spice: Everyone stay OFF the roads...stay off the sidewalks too, now that I'm thinking about it, if you value your lives.
Shiroryu: HEY!
Tashy911: Thanks. know what? I get that a lot. If you're scared now, you'll be terrified after this chapter...
*
Queen of All Chipmunks: Hmm.do you know my sister? Because she claims her chinchilla, Darby (imaginary, of course. Just don't tell her that) is the mistress of all hairless monkeys...yeah, I'm looking into getting her professional help. Soon. Don't worry. No need to rule over all the chipmunks to get me to update. Doing it right now. Thanks for reviewing.
*
xo-Kagome-ox: Glad I made you laugh. That is the main mission of this fanfic. To bring a smile to all who come across it. (and to scare the pants off all who come across it too.) Thanks for your review. Always appreciated.
*
Tache: Thanks. How did what happen? Sango singing? The idea of this fanfic? My sister deciding it was OK to have an imaginary pet chinchilla named Darby? What? Well, you can answer my questions next time you review (which will be right after you read this chapter. Right?)
*
Kenny: Much love and gratitude! This story is gonna be comprised of mostly songs from Disney movies, although, if I see fit, some will be from non- Disney movies. Not often, but sometimes.
*
Megami no Nekura: What's in the water I'm drinking...I am not at liberty to discuss the contents of my drinking beverages. *whispers loudly to her screen* The freakin FBI has got my computer bugged! They're still trying to find me after the Tijuana incident.
*
Wizogirl192003: OK. Will do.
*
*
*
Alright, now that that's out of the way-
Saffron Spice: Hey, I wanna say something.
Shiroryu: Back off!
Saffron Spice: This is a CO-AUTHORED fic.
Shiroryu: Yeah, but I'M the one that does the authoring part1
Saffron Spice: Just lemme say something.
Shiroryu: You have two minutes.
Saffron Spice: Hey everyone! Just wanna thank everyone for reviewing-
Shiroryu: I ALREADY did that!
Saffron Spice: Hey. You said two minutes!
Shiroryu: *grumbles* Fine
Saffron Spice: To the Queen of All Chipmunks- You are so cool for understanding our obligation to rule over the rodents. I KNEW there were others like me.
Shiroryu: hey, don't insult the reviewer! She won't come back!
Saffron Spice: Whatever. Let's just get on with the story.
Shiroryu: Fine by me.
~*~
Disclaimer: Inuyasha is not ours. Neither is the song we used in this chapter. They belong to Rumiko Takahashi and Disney. Back off.
~*~
"What is going on?" Kagome asked herself as she followed the obviously so- far-out-of-her-mind-she'll-have-trouble-relocating-her-senses-anytime-soon Sango and the oblivious-to-the-world-crashing-around-his-very-ears Shippo.
"Whatcha say Kagome?" Sango asked.
"Huh? Oh, nothing." Kagome said, a little startled. Was this all a dream? No. her head still hurt as if it was used as a wrecking ball. So what was going on? As they reached Kaede's hut, Kagome felt herself relax a bit. Hey, she liked singing in the shower, so what was the matter with Sango singing in the village?
And dancing.
With all the villagers watching.
And singing
And dancing.
In unison.
And in French.
Suddenly, Kagome didn't feel so relaxed anymore.
They got to the hut and had just stepped inside when they heard Inuyasha and Miroku coming.
"Hey guys!" Sango greeted cheerfully. She went back outside to talk to them, while Kagome stayed behind. She was still heated about hers and Inuyasha's conversation the night before. If her memory served her correctly, he had said something along the lines of "She was old, so you knew she was gonna keel over soon." In response to hearing about her grandmother's death. True, she had only met her grandmother once, but still! That was just cold-hearted. How could you speak about someone's relative like that? All for that stupid jewel again! The one that basically ruled her pitiful existence she fondly christened her life.
"Oh come on Kagome! Are you still mad?" Inuyasha asked. He got a very icy glare as a reply.
"I would take that as a yes, Inuyasha." Miroku said.
"I can work that out for myself, Monk!" he said irritated.
"So are you gonna work this out? We can't very well go around looking for the shards with Kagome still angry with you, can we?"
"How do you suppose I talk to her when she won't answer?"
"You're not trying hard enough."
"Look, why don't you try and make the stubborn cow listen, and I give you the lame advice?"
"SIT!"
WHOOSH
BAM
THUD
"Ugh!"
"YOU KNOW, I'M FREAKIN STANDING RIGHT HERE, YOU INSENSITIVE JERK!"
Kagome stomped off into the woods to clear her head. She looked like she was headed toward the bone-eater's well. "She's probably going home." Sango commented. Miroku nodded in agreement.
"Let's go see if we can catch up to her before she goes, OK Shippo?" Sango asked the little fox demon.
"Sure."
While they were walking away, Sango muttered discreetly to Miroku "Will you please try and get Inuyasha to stop being such an idiot?" "I try everyday of my life." He rolled his eyes. Sango shrugged and carried on walking. Miroku kneeled on the ground to talk to his thickheaded friend.
"You know, you really have to stop doing that." He commented.
"HWERT WHOS, MEERAWU!!!" Inuyasha yelled into the dirt.
"Didn't catch that. Don't speak stupid."
Inuyasha finally lifted his head out of the earth, "Why I oughta-"
"Will you just shut up?" Miroku smashed his staff between Inuyasha's eyes to get his attention.
"I know I'll pay for that one later." He thought. While Inuyasha was incapacitated, Miroku decided that that was the opportune time to get the stubborn idiot to listen.
He was wrong.
"You know, you're not all that tough, once you get to know you."
"Gonna kill you Monk." Inuyasha mumbled.
"I think you just worry too much."
"Smash you into the 30 nearest trees."
"If you were to just relax a little, I think you could act like a decent person."
"Light your body aflame. That'll be fun."
"Inuyasha, are you even listening to me?" Miroku asked, a bit on the frustrated side.
"Nope. I'm planning your death. Don't worry, it'll be long and painful.Hmm, never mind. I guess a long and painful death would give one cause to worry. Sucks to be you."
"I suppose. Before you slay me, why don't you just pay attention to what I'm saying for a minute."
"Talk." Inuyasha sighed. He tuned in while he sharpened his claws on a nearby rock. What? He had to be ready for when the Monk stopped talking, right?
"You worry too much." Miroku stated.
"Huh?" That one took the half dog demon for a loop. He'd never heard that one before.
"You worry too much." Miroku reiterated. "I think if you just loosened up, you'd be a nicer person."
"Where are you going with this, Monk?" Inuyasha asked suspiciously.
"I thought you'd never ask." Miroku stood up and turned his back to Inuyasha. Suddenly, everything went dark, even though it wasn't even noon yet. Then, a bright light from out of nowhere shined down on Miroku. He turned only his head back towards Inuyasha and said...
"Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata
Hakuna Matata!!!"
He whirled around and started to snap his fingers to the suddenly existent beat of music. Inuyasha's eyes widen in terror as he watched the Monk dance toward him.(If you've ever seen Fresh Prince of Bel-Air and have seen Carlton dance, then you know why Inuyasha is so scared.)
"When I was a cool young one,
I worked in the colony, paid my dues
Accepted without question of prevailing views
The young man life was one more ride"
"Oh my god." Inuyasha muttered. Miroku had lost it, completely. Why on earth was he singing and dancing?!?!?!
TO HIM!!!
"Digging holes, standing guard
Didn't cross my mind!
I was wrong
All along
All that I needed
Was to have heeded..."
Inuyasha could feel tears welling up in his eyes as Miroku threw off his Monk robes to reveal tight black leather pants and a sparkly red, half way buttoned, long baggy-sleeved disco shirt (Ricky Martin wannabe? Oh yeah...)
"Hakuna Matata!
What a wonderful phrase!
Hakuna Matata
Ain't no passing craze."
"WHAT ON EARTH IS HAKUNA MATATA! AND WHERE DID YOU GET THOSE GOD-AWFUL CLOTHES?!?!?" Inuyasha cried, covering his now very un-virgin eyes.
"It means no worries
For the rest of your days!
It's my problem free
Philosophy
Hakuna Matata!"
"I've had enough. I am so outta here!" Inuyasha shouted. "There's gotta be something in the water." He grumbled as he got up to leave. That's when Miroku threw his staff right at Inuyasha's feet. In a matter of 10 seconds, Inuyasha tripped, Miroku miraculously found rope, and tied our doggie-eared friend up tighter than a convict in a Texas prison (no offense to any one in Texas) to a tree, slapped an anti-demon spell on the rope so he couldn't get out, and gagged him.
And then Miroku, to add to Inuyasha's contaminated memory that will haunt him for the rest of his life, did the Electric Slide.
Yes, friends, the Electric Slide.
Oh the horror.
"AAAGGGHHH!!!" Inuyasha screamed into his gag. He never thought he would die this way. He always imagined lots of blood, and swords, and other violent crap like that. Not his best friend in a shiny shirt dancing like a pansy. Where the heck did he learn to do that? And for the love of the Shikon no Tama, WHERE THE HECK WAS THAT MUSIC COMING FROM?!?!?!
"When I was a shallow youth
I yadda yadda for perfection
I was never no good
Yadda yadda yadda
"What, you don't know all the lines?" Inuyasha tried to say. But since he had the gag in his mouth, it came out as "Moh, woo whon oo aww ba wines?" Apparently, Miroku didn't care. So he just carried on.
"I put my best foot forward
while the other one stood still
Take my word
I have heard
All that I needed
Was to have heeded..."
Miroku spun around, kicking his feet up every so often. He did moves I can't even describe to you, my friends. Poor Inuyasha will never look at him the same way again.
"Hakuna Matata!
What a wonderful phrase.
Hakuna Matata
Ain't no passing craze.
It means no worries
For the rest of your days!
It's my problem free
Philosophy!
Hakuna Ma-"
"Miroku?" someone called from a little ways away. Just then, the music stopped, the sun decided to shine on more than our unpredictable friend, and Miroku's regular clothes were on.
"Miroku?" Sango called as she stepped into the clearing the two boys were in with Shippo on her shoulder. Everything looked normal. Miroku was meditating, the birds were singing, and Inuyasha was...
Inuyasha was tied to a tree.
OK, maybe normal wasn't the correct word.
Sango looked at Inuyasha for a minute, saw his plead for help in his eyes, wondered what on earth happened to the poor boy and.
Kept walking.
Peaceful.
THAT was the correct word.
Sango knew she'd pay for that one later, but could you really blame her? Peace and quiet was not common in that part of the village. If it wasn't Kagome and Inuyasha fighting, it was Miroku and Inuyasha fighting. The girl just wanted some time to think. And Inuyasha tied and gagged to a tree would help significantly.
"Umm...Miroku?" Sango asked before she stepped into the hut.
"Yes Sango?" he cracked open one eye, so as not to disturb his "meditating"
"Kagome went back to her own time before I could catch her."
"Oh, alright."
Sango went inside the hut. About 2 minutes later she stuck her head outside again.
"Hey, Miroku?"
"Yes Sango?"
"Was it hard to get Inuyasha tied up like that?"
"No, not really."
"Then could you do it more often, please?"
"WHEY!!!" Inuyasha grunted.
"Sure." Miroku answered.
Sango smiled and went back inside, leaving Miroku to his meditating and Inuyasha to his tree, never guessing what had taken place only 5 minutes previous. Had she known, maybe she wouldn't have teased Inuyasha about his sudden case of twitchy eyes.
Especially common when Miroku was around.
Those boys were a little too weird to figure out.
END OF CHAPTER 3
*
Ok, I'm sure you've all noticed by now that this was not the original song sung in the Lion King. Honestly, this just went better with the direction of this fic. Plus I highly doubt Miroku would be singing about when he was "a young wart hog" and his little "problem": That was just too much for my poor little brain to handle. Anyways, hit that button that says 'Submit Review' and we'll all be happy campers. By the way, Guess what! I just turned 16! (Whoo-hoo! My birthday was Saturday. I'm gonna actually start driving soon
Saffron Spice: Everyone stay OFF the roads...stay off the sidewalks too, now that I'm thinking about it, if you value your lives.
Shiroryu: HEY!