I trail after Alice as she leads me through the cyan door, feeling even more nervous than the last time this happened. What does she know? What is she going to say? What should I say? Why did I have to go and make things so much more uncertain for myself?!

When we reach the crew quarters, Alice moves into the first room on the right, and I wince — this is the same room Dio killed me in. As if I wasn't uncomfortable enough already…

"This is probably about as secure a place as we're likely to find around here." Alice says. "So let's talk, Clover."

My stomach clenching, I nod uneasily and walk inside. I sit down gingerly on the miserable excuse for a bed and try not to look at the floor, recalling all too vividly how it looked coated in my blood.

"First things first:" Alice says, "are you okay?"

I open my mouth to tell her I'm fine... only for my words to utterly fail me. After what happened last timeline, barely half an hour ago from my perspective, I just can't bring myself to say that.

"...no, not really." I end up mumbling back. "I screwed up. Badly."

Alice shakes her head. "Well, that's all you could really expect for trusting someone you don't even know. Honestly, what were you thinking? I know you've been taught better than that."

She thinks I'm talking about the round results. Which I guess means she doesn't remember or know anything the last timeline after all? That's good... that's...

I swallow, feeling like a hole just opened up in my chest for some reason. Alice is back to not knowing who I am, and she doesn't hate me. I should be happy about this. So... so why aren't I? Instead, I just feel…

My eyes begin to ache as I bring my knees up to my chest, curling in on myself as the memory of the look on Alice's face when I told her I wasn't Clover flashes through my head. In my mind's eye, it seems to superimpose itself over her current expression, the images beginning to bleed together into one.

...oh. I see. It isn't that I'm upset that Alice doesn't hate me.

It's that, if she realized who I truly was... she would.

I know that now. Proved it to myself beyond any shadow of a doubt. And that... hurts. It shouldn't; I barely even know Alice, but I already realized earlier just how abnormally attached to her I am now, and- god, why did I do this to myself…?

"I- I'm sorry... really…" I whisper more than say, barely able to get the words past my lips.

Alice's expression softens.

"Hey. It's alright." she says, sitting down on the bed next to me and wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "You're behind on points, but you can make that up next round. You just have to make sure whoever you end up grouped with trusts you enough to pick ally."

The fact that Alice doesn't even know why I'm apologizing to her somehow makes it hurt all the more. Her attempt to comfort me almost makes me want to tell her the truth again; to remind her that she doesn't truly care about me, not the real me... and yet, I find myself leaning into the warmth of her half-embrace anyways. Despite my misgivings, I just can't seem to find it in myself to pull away.

"I'm sure you're scared right now." Alice continues, rubbing small circles into my back. "Angry, too... I know I certainly am. But we can make it through this. I know we can."

The words soothe me more than they have any real right to. None of what Alice is saying is meant for me — I don't know if I could possibly be more aware of that than I am right now. But even so, it's just so, so incredibly nice to feel like there's someone here with me in this situation who's on my side, other than myself. Even if Alice doesn't realize who she's talking to, and at least part of why I feel this way is probably just because of the body I'm currently occupying, it's impossible for me to deny how much it seems to help.

I feel myself quivering, and not from the cold. Maybe- maybe if I just pretend I'm really Clover for a bit, even to myself...

"Remember, we're in this together." Alice says softly, turning the half-embrace into a full one. "If you need me..."

No, please don't say it. Please...

"I'm here for you."

My will crumbles, and I shakily loosen my arms from around my legs to tightly hug her back. Tension immediately begins to drain out of me as I do so, even as I strain to hold back sobs.

I never truly earned Alice's trust, and maybe I've even already proved I don't deserve it. But I... I need this.

I need this…

-~.~-

-~.~-

It takes me a few minutes before I finally pull back from the hug, feeling marginally better, but utterly embarrassed. Here I was going on about how I was going to try and avoid repeating what I did the last time I went through this timeline, only to immediately go and do almost exactly the same thing I did the first time I had this talk with Alice. Now who's the hypocrite...

I take a moment to wipe away the small, traitorous droplets that have once again gathered at the corners of my eyes. At least I managed to keep myself from having a full on breakdown this time — honestly, it might have just been healthier to let myself do that, but I've done way too much crying as of late already, to the point that I'm honestly starting to feel kind of pathetic because of it. Upsetting things are almost certainly going to keep happening, and if I can't figure out how to get past them without falling to pieces every time, I could easily end up making the same sort of mistake I made the last timeline again. Alice can't always be my emotional support, especially when I'm still so conflicted about her at the moment that relying on her even more might just make me feel worse...

...god I'm a mess.

"Feeling any better?" Alice asks.

I nod slowly. "Yeah... sorry about that, Alice."

Alice shakes her head. "No need to apologize Clover. It's not like I couldn't guess you'd be upset about being trapped in a third Nonary Game."

I wish had the excuse of it being my third time in one of these things, but no. This one is proving enough to break me all on its own.

"You're not wrong..." I admit. "I hate that I'm trapped in this place. Trapped in this game... in this situation where I could potentially die at any time, and I don't even know how or why. To be honest, I'm really scared I'm going to screw up even worse than I already have, and end up either dead, or stuck here forever. It feels like I'm doing everything wrong..."

I pause, silently drawing in a long, slow breath before continuing.

"...but, I'll try my best to stay positive, and keep myself together." I say. "I mean... I made it out of the last two, right?"

I make an attempt to smile, the effort made somewhat easier by the fact that everything I just said was, technically, completely true. Alice smiles back, so I guess it must not look too terribly fake.

"That's a good attitude to take, Clover." Alice says. "But that's no reason not to be careful. Remember, you still only have 1 BP right now."

She pulls back from me slightly to look me dead in the eyes. "I don't plan on letting either of us die here. So whatever happens next round? Make sure you pick betray."

I flinch back slightly at her suddenly commanding tone.

"It would be best if whoever you end up grouped with trusts you enough to choose ally," Alice continues, "but as long as you choose betray, you won't lose any more points regardless. That should at least ensure that you stay alive, no matter what your opponent chooses. It's the only logical option."

I consider objecting for a few moments, but eventually just nod. I won't feel good about it, but Alice has a point, as I'd really rather not add "death by bracelet" to the list of ways I've been killed thus far. Sure, doing so could trigger another SHIFT, but my goal is to manage to cross timelines without dying at all, not to just find new and creative ways to repeatedly commit suicide. I don't know if I could make myself do that anyways — my first two deaths were traumatizing enough without actively seeking them out.

"K and Luna both only have 1 BP left too though." I remind her. "I don't really want to get either of them killed either, if I can help it."

Granted, Luna wouldn't actually die even if she hit 0 BP, but everyone would still think she did, and they'd see it as my fault. K though, I really could kill by choosing betray, and with the way his bracelet is built into his suit, I'm pretty sure the aluminum foil won't work to detach it the way it should with everyone else's. Better to just avoid the potential for those scenarios entirely.

Alice frowns, but thankfully doesn't seem any keener on the idea of game-induced manslaughter than I am.

"You're right… we should make an effort to get you grouped with Quark then." she says. "Now, I need you in work mode, alright?"

With that, the conversation returns to a more familiar track, allowing me to mostly regain the rest of my composure in the process. Alice asks me the same expected question about attempting to contact Light, then takes a brief look at the files I brought along before asking if I learned anything about my group members during the last round. I tell her roughly the same things about Tenmyouji and K that I did before, though I omit the part about the former trusting me, since he pretty clearly showed otherwise this time around. Alice responds in the expected manner, but when it comes time for her tell to me about Sigma and Phi, things change slightly.

"Now for what I learned." Alice says. "You're paired with Sigma this round, right?"

I nod, and Alice grimaces. "I should warn you then, he's something of a dirty old man."

"Yeah, I noticed." I mutter quietly to myself.

Alice raises an eyebrow. "Did you now?"

...not quietly enough, apparently.

"Er, yeah." I say, having little choice but to reply. "It's kind of hard not to pick up on, talking to him."

Alice raises an eyebrow. "Well, I can't deny that, but when did you even talk to him while I wasn't around? I don't think he's said anything too overt in front of both of us."

"Uh..." I stall, frantically thinking back to when Sigma and I could possibly have interacted out of Alice's sight this early in the timeline. "...it was… when we were returning to the warehouse through the lounge, before the AB round. You'd already gone ahead, and while Sigma and I were leaving the room, he made a passing comment about my..."

I look down and just sort of gesture vaguely at myself, assuming Alice will get the idea. I feel a little bad for slandering Sigma when he actually didn't say anything this time, but it's not like it wouldn't have been perfectly in character for him to do so.

Alice rolls her eyes, but seems to take it in stride.

"Well, it's only to be expected with outfits like these." she says. "Just remember Clover, it's all part of the job."

I tilt my head slightly to the side, confused. Part of the job? What is she-

A vague memory brushes at the fringes of my mind. Oh- oh! That's right, Zero Time Dilemma did try to explain Clover and Alice's outfits! I don't remember exactly when, but I think it said that SOIS has its members dress in really outlandish costumes when out in public, specifically to divert any suspicion of them being secret agents? It was something like that, at least.

…yeah, that still makes no sense. At all. Sticking out from the crowd in a really bizarre way has no actual advantages over not sticking out to begin with. That justification is just plain asinine, to the point that I'd honestly have preferred if they just never addressed it at all. No wonder I'd completely forgotten that little factoid up until now.

"It could be useful anyways." Alice continues. "Sigma isn't stupid. He actually solved most of the puzzles in the crew quarters by himself. But if he's too busy thinking with his lower head to reason with his normal one-"

Oh gross.

"-he'll be that much easier to manipulate." Alice finishes. "Keep that in mind if you need him to do something while you're paired with each other."

I nod at her on the outside, while internally shaking my head. Hard. I really didn't need to hear the "seduction" suggestion again, especially in regards to the 60-year old man who doesn't yet realize he's a 60-year old man.

The conversation thankfully moves on after that, with Alice laughing about Sigma's cat-speech and warning me about Phi. I refrain from telling her how Phi was watching me during the talk with Zero Jr., not seeing any real value in doing so, and not wanting to explain why she'd be suspicious of me to begin with.

"That's about it, I think." Alice says as she stands back up. "But… there is one more thing, Clover."

I startle slightly upon hearing that, the sentence serving to remind me that last time, this is when Alice brought up how I knew K's name before he actually thought of it. Shoot, can I explain that some other way this time around? I don't really want to say I was "seeing the future" again, lest the topic potentially trigger her remembering a future I'd much rather she forget. But I have no idea how to justify my knowing what K would call himself ahead of time…

Cursing myself for not being able to think of anything on the fly, I hesitantly respond. "Y-yeah? What is it?"

Alice turns to face me, her expression oddly conflicted.

"I…"

She suddenly stops. A long, pregnant moment goes by before she finally resumes her sentence.

"…you know what? Nevermind."

I blink at her. Er, alright then? I'm relieved, but also confused... Alice clearly had something to say, so why did she stop herself? Is it because I didn't "lead" her to the crew quarters this time, so she's not as sure about her theory? I really don't need any more questions right now...

"Come on, we should get out of here and start looking for exits." Alice says as she opens the door. "I doubt we'll actually find any, but we have to at least try."

I stand, still a little unsure what to think, but all too happy to get out of this room, which I've only been partially succeeding at putting out of mind. I'm stopped from actually entering the hallway however, as Alice pauses in the middle of the doorframe, then turns towards me again.

"...Clover?" she says slowly. "If you-"

"Oh, hey Miss Alice!"

Whatever Alice was about to say is cut off by the sudden arrival of Quark and K, who step into view just past her in the doorframe.

"Ah, and Clover as well." K says, peering over Alice's shoulder. "Are we interrupting anything?"

Alice looks back at me, squints for a moment, then shakes her head and smiles. "No, not really. It was nothing too important."

I give her a slightly questioning look, which Alice seems to ignore. Well, I have no idea what she was about to say, but if it was about my "future knowledge" as I suspect, then I guess I'm glad she got interrupted. I'm not quite sure why K and Quark are here though — I was expecting Sigma, not this slightly odd pair. Granted, I'd rather not have had to deal with Sigma's incessant questioning again, but at least I'd have seen it coming... and he also wouldn't be stopping us from leaving, like K is right now. I don't think it's intentional, but his bulk is keeping Alice from being able to step fully outside, essentially blockading us inside the room I'm becoming increasingly antsy to leave.

"These are the crew quarters, right?" Quark asks, looking around before turning back to Alice. "Mister K and I haven't seen them yet, so we thought we'd come check them out. Have you or Miss Clover found anything?"

Alice shakes her head. "Sorry, but we haven't."

Not that we've really been looking.

"Hmm. Perhaps we would be better served looking for an exit elsewhere then." K observes.

"Well, we could have missed something." I chime in, trying to speed the conversation along. "Maybe you'll find something we didn't? Alice and I have been here too long anyways... and um, on that note, K? Could you move, so we can get out?"

"Ah, of course." K replies, stepping backwards and scooting closer to the opposing wall. Alice takes the opportunity to at last exit into the hallway proper, and I follow on her heels, quickly closing the door behind me as I do. Finally…

"My apologies." K says in a mildly embarrassed tone. "I keep forgetting just how large I seem to be in this suit."

Alice shrugs. "Well, in any event, Clover's right that we've been here too long. If you think this place is worth searching further, we'll let you two take it from here."

K seems to think it over for a few moments, then nods. "I suppose a quick look around couldn't hurt. Good luck to the both of you."

He opens the door across from the one we just came out of, and walks into the room beyond.

"Hey, wait for me Mister K!" Quark calls. "Seeya Miss Alice, seeya Miss Clover!"

With that, he follows K into the room, slamming the door behind them as he does.

Jeez, that was... abrupt.

AN: ...much like the ending of this chapter, which is now apparently going to be a three-parter rather than a two-parter, due to this section getting way longer than initially expected. Thank Alice for that — this was supposed to the chapter where the mood finally began to improve a bit from the drama of the previous ones, but Alice decided I wasn't quite done being mean to myself just yet. I swear, at some point I'm going to have to write one of those hugely self-indulgent power-trip type SIs, just to make up for everything else I've put myself through in this and Stand-in.

In exchange for the slight shortness of this chapter, the next part should be out next week, as opposed to next month, like this one was. Promise I won't do that again. ^_^;