Chapter Four

Thumbs Down

Alex smiled as he saw three American tourists, and wandered over to them. Sabina was wearing sunglasses, and sporting a designer handbag. Edward Pleasure, her dad, was jotting things into a notebook that was almost full with his newest novel. Her mum, Liz Pleasure, was reading a fashion magazine.

Sabina saw him first, and stood up. She ran towards him and hugged him hard. She started asking lots of questions.

"Sabina, I'll answer all your questions when you let go." he groaned, trying to prise himself free of her grip. He was quite glad she hadn't yet adopted an American accent. Her mum and dad were starting to. After a long while, she grabbed his arm and dragged him over to see her parents.

"How are you?" Alex asked Edward Pleasure.

"I'm recovering, slowly," he replied. "With these too ladies around the house, I'm not allowed to do anything for myself!"

Liz punched him softly in the arm. He giggled and they started play fighting.

Sabina walked away, looking embarrassed. They both sat up, but then she turned round and joined in. Alex was surprised there were no policemen about. They'd sort this out in no time.

"Come on then," Alex said. "Where are we going first?"

"I thought we might check out a museum. You know, somewhere you've never been."

Alex was instantly reminded of Cornwall yet again.

"Where do you want to go, Alex?"

"Well, I've been to the Science Museum," he said. He didn't want to go there again. "But other than that, I've not seen many museums."

"How about a history museum? I need to research mummification, anyway."

"What is your book about, Mr. Pleasure?"

"Well, you'll have to read it. It's a children's book, so you might like it!"

"I don't read children's books, Mr. Pleasure." Alex stated bluntly.

"You'll like this one. It's about a teenage spy..."

"Don't worry, Alex. He's joking. He's writing a fantasy book, aren't you, Daddy?"

"Yes, dear, it's a fantasy book. Sometimes I think your head is a fantasy book."

"And why could you possibly think that?"

"Because it's full of fairies, monsters, and other things like that!"

"You can't insult fairies and monsters, dad, they make your living!"

"Ain't that the truth."

After that, they set off. They got on the underground to a local station, and then got a bus the rest of the way.

Finally, they arrived. They got a chance to look at everything, since there was no rush. When they arrived at the Ancient Egyptians, Edward Pleasure began taking notes, while Liz pointed out interesting facts to Sabina and Alex. Sabina and her mum had waited outside the real mummification video, and even Alex didn't like it much. It was interesting, but made him want to vomit. Finally, when they got to the preserved body part, Alex had to look away.

Next, they saw the prehistoric section, where they saw animatronic robot dinosaurs, battling it out to see who would get to eat the other. After that, they saw the Roman times, where some actors dressed as gladiators fought each other, and another animatronic gladiator fought an animatronic tiger, who's paw had been snapped off, by someone who probably knew better.

Next it was the Ye Olde England section, from the Victorian times, to the present day.

Finally, they visited the gift shop. Alex bought a museum pencil, sharpener, rubber and notebook. Eventually, he gave the sharpener to Edward Pleasure, as his pencil lead had just snapped.

Alex decided to do some studying. Even though this was a holiday, he needed to be up to date when he arrived next year. He had learnt a lot of History, and while they were waiting for the next train to arrive, he caught up on his Maths. He read the first chapter of Edward Pleasure's children's story (which he quite enjoyed) and wrote his own. His, however was not half as good. It was about a teenage spy who joins MI6 and has to travel to Cornwall to investigate a mad businessman.

Soon, the train arrived, and Liz set Alex some questions to do on the journey, about General Knowledge. He knew all of them, but really they were far too easy. The only ones he wouldn't have known were the History ones and the Geography ones. But, he saw a map of London in the station and that helped him out. And he had just been into a History Museum, so he was quite likely to have found out the answers. The questions were obviously based on things Liz had seen in the day.

After passing, nine out of ten, they arrived at the hotel. There was a small green at the back, dominated by kids play area and a set of goalposts. A couple of German toddlers, supervised by their mother, were swinging up and down, while a slightly older boy played on the slide.

Alex and Sabina decided to go down for a game of football. They struggled at first, with just two players on a full pitch, so they took off their jumpers and put them on the halfway line, as makeshift goalposts to shorten the pitch.

In the end, Alex won two – one. He had to admit Sabina played well, especially since she didn't get much practice in in America. And anyway, Alex was on his school team, and if he did say so himself, they were pretty good. He was used to winning by now.

The call came at about four. Spaghetti Bolognese was cooking silently in the kitchen, while Alex and Sabina waged war against each other again in a game of Monopoly.

So far, Sabina had more money than him, but he had more houses. He even had a hotel on Mayfair.

Sabina rolled a five and a four, landing on chance. She reached across and grabbed a card.

"Let's see – oh, not street repairs!" she groaned, as she handed over a big handful of cash to the bank.

The phone rang, and Liz stood up, wandering into the kitchen to answer it.

The game continued, and Alex had to pay Sabina for landing on her only hotel – Piccadilly.

"That'll be $1200. Oh, sorry, I mean pounds, don't I?"

"Alex – phone for you."

Alex walked into the kitchen to answer the phone.

"Alex?"

"Mr. Crawley?"

"Yes, Alex. I wonder if you could come down to the bank. We need to talk to you."

"Sorry, Mr. Crawley. I refuse to do any more missions. I come close to death every time, and last time was as close as I would like until I'm ready to die."

"Well, we need to speak to you all the same – about the business with the ferry."

"Look, Mr. Crawley, I'm on holiday – could you leave me alone for just two months?"

"Sadly, Alex, we can't. We have something that needs seeing to. After that, you'll never hear from us again. Never. I don't want to do this, but Mr. Blunt has more power than you know."

"I can hazard a guess. Fine, I'll be there. But I'm not doing anything for you."

"Great. Five o'clock?"

"I'll be there."

Alex hung up, then went back to the game.

At five o'clock, Alex arrived. He entered the bank, asked for Mr. Crawley, then sat down in the comfy leather armchair near the lifts.

The nearest one to Alex soon popped open, and out stepped John Crawley, in his usual suit and Marks and Spencer tie.

Alex stood, and they got into the lift. Soon, they reached the top floor, and Crawley led Alex down a long corridor, to the offices of Mr. Alan Blunt.

Alex entered, and Crawley walked back into the lift.

"Alex." Blunt said simply. He never had any kind of expression. He was a spy. Nothing more. Not even a real human.

"We heard about you stopping the robber on the ferry." Mrs. Jones said. She had a strange, potato shaped head, and was always sucking a peppermint. Even now, she was opening the wrapping of yet another. Alex wondered how she could possibly eat real food with that kind of taste in her mouth.

"You caused a lot of mayhem."

"So? It would have been much worse if the robbers got away."

"Yes. By the way, how did you escape?"

"I swam about a quarter of a mile to Dover, then snuck onto a train to London."

"How did you get onto the train for free?"

"I hid in the toilets while the tickets were being collected."

"Very resourceful."

"Not really – people do it all the time."

"Well, we shall have to look into that. Meanwhile, have you ever heard of the businessmen's club?"

"Not really."

"Well, they're based in America. They are a group of friends, all very rich, who meet once a month to discuss things. But now, two members have died. We need to know why."

"I'm sorry, but I've told you. I don't want anything to do with this."

"Alex, if you'll let me explain, you'll see how important this is. Anyway, in their contracts, it states that if one of them dies, all their belongings are invested into the club. One of the members quit about a year ago, but his contract still binds him. We believe he is murdering each of them to control their power. If he kills all of them, he'll have enough power to control the world."

"So? You don't need a child. You could use an adult to pose as a businessman."

"Impossible. If Byram gets in on it he'll kill the agent as well. Smithers is working on your gadgets now."

It was as if they'd already decided. They didn't care what he wanted. They would send him anyway.

"Smithers office – well, you've been there before. I trust you can find it?"

"Yes, but I'm not-"

Mrs. Jones ignored him and pushed him out of the door.

Smithers was in his office when Alex arrived.

"Oh, hello old chap! Lovely to see you. Seat?"

Alex thought Smithers was addressing him, but instead a large, comfy armchair slid out from behind a bookcase.

"Now," he continued. "I've got you something to play with."

He opened a drawer and pulled out a sketchpad and a packet of coloured pens.

"Thanks," Alex muttered, "but I'm too old for colouring."

"Of course. That's lucky. You wouldn't want to colour with these. Each colour has a different effect. If you draw on the pad with the blue one..." he began to demonstrate. "It becomes invisible. The yellow one makes it visible again. The red isn't a pen at all – it's a rocket launcher. Just a small one though. And I've only equipped you with sleepers and stun darts. Finally, the green pen is a listening and recording device."

He pointed to a small hole in the pen packet. "You see this? You have the green pen in the packet. If you twist the cap, it will record. Twist it back and it'll stop. Take the top off and it will play. To reverse, twist the bottom. To fast forward, twist the bottom the other way."

Smithers put the book and pens to one side, and picked up a finger ring.

"The finger ring has a special compartment, for storing anything small enough."

"Well, aren't you going to give me something to put in it?"

"We have. See that pattern inside? Press it and it will set of a timer. It's a small explosive. It'll blow a hole in almost anything."

Smithers put down the ring on top of the sketchbook and took out a designer jacket and packet of crisps.

"Sorry to disappoint you, Mr. Smithers, but I don't smoke."

"Well, the jacket is bullet-proof, stab-proof, and really cool looking. The crisps," Smithers turned the pack over, "have a concealed uplink to us. There's also a lighter with a camera in, but that's not quite finished. You'll get it in the mail."

"Well, thanks, but have MI6 not told you that I quit?"

"Of course they've told me."

"So why did you make me gadgets?"

"You'll need them."

Alex arrived back at six. He had missed dinner, but managed to pick up a burger from a nearby takeaway. Sabina's parents were starting to get worried, but he arrived just as they were on the verge of calling the police. He'd told them he was going for a short walk. He came back with his new gadgets in a bag, and when Liz Pleasure asked what it was, he said he'd bought some Christmas presents. They all wanted to see what he had bought, but he said most of it was presents for them, so they weren't allowed to look.

After a couple of days of lounging around, they set off. They next visited Cornwall, for four days, then visited the Isle of Mann, then they went up into Chester, to look at the historical buildings. Then off to Manchester, to look at all the museums, even one made entirely of glass. Finally, they stayed for a night in Edinburgh, then got a train back to London airport. They were going home. For Alex, however, it was quite the opposite. He was leaving home.