Chapter 6

Dinner and a Drama Part 1

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As the day wore on, two men were returning home after spending most of the days paying their respects to poor bar owners ... by helping them with their income.

"At last, Saotome," said the one in a faded brown gi, "this horrible day is at an end."

"Very true, Tendo old friend," said the man in the dirty white gi with a handkerchief covering his forehead. "We must redouble our efforts to find the worthless son of mine, so that the schools can be joined.

"Very true, Saotome. After your son marries my precious Akane, they can both teach classes, and we can sit back and observe as they lead Anything Goes well into the next decade."

What was left unsaid was how much they wanted that to be now, as Nodoka was forcing both of them to teach, and seriously cutting into the shogi game time as well as drinking.

"Then tomorrow, we shall set off to find my wayward boy and drag him back to his loving fiancée."

"WAH! How could your son leave my lonely daughter all alone?"

"Don't worry, Tendo!" "My honorless boy will do what's right." "After all, he must do what honor demands." "I trained him in such myself." "And look how honorable I am," signed the neo-panda, as the Tendo Patriarch Waterworks activated the curse.

Most people passing them by were by now used to seeing a panda using signs to talk to the crying man, and thus paid them no real attention. After almost six years, they were rather used to this occurrence. After all, it always followed a pattern.

See duo.

See duo cry.

Cry, duo, cry.

See duo plan to find son of smelly panda.

Plan, duo, plan.

See duo drink.

Repeat as necessary.

Of course, today was far from ordinary.

As they opened the door to the Tendo Compound, singing about the upcoming wedding between Ranma and Akane—once they dragged Ranma to it—they stopped seeing a dark haired little girl performing a simple kata. "Saotome, were we supposed to teach classes today?"

"Not that I know," came the panda's sign.

The little girl stopped mid-kick, to see the new arrivals. She knew from stories from her Daddy, that the big fat panda was Grandpa Baka, which meant the other one must be Grandpa Waterfall.

Now, it should be known that as a daughter of Ranma Saotome, the little girl is always wanting to be strong just like her daddy, already deciding that her new baby brother could do all the boring book learning. As such, she was always hanging out with her father to learn new techniques, face new challenges, so she could get stronger and be a hero like her Daddy.

As such, she figured that the two Masters of Anything Goes who had been at it as long as these two had been, that were now standing before her in mild confusion, would be the perfect tests to see how much she had improved.

So, smiling, she repeated what she had heard off an old video game she played at her home. "Let Kombat begin!"

And thus, charged at them, intending to impress them with how great her abilities were, and perhaps learn how she stood against two masters of her family's Art.

Sadly, even if they had been sober, the two would have been in too much shock at seeing the little girl charge—at least, that is what they would claim later on—that they failed to move as she delivered a quick punch followed by a spin kick ... at very sensitive areas on a male.

"WAH! I'm coming to see you, Kimiko!"

"Panda down, panda down!"

"Kimiko, what's going on out here?" asked a female voice.

"Mommy," cried out the excited girl, "I defeated the Masters of Anything Goes!"

Nabiki blinked as she picked up her daughter, seeing the two Fathers down on the ground, clutching their privates. Well, nothing important hurt. "Very nice dear, now run in and tell your Daddy, but don't show him."

"Okay, Mommy," said little Kimiko, as she ran inside to tell her Daddy of her great victory.

Nabiki shook her head at the two men ... well, man and panda. "Seriously, you two should be used to pain like that."

"It was a dirty shot!" cried the sign of the panda.

"Well, it is called Anything Goes for a reason," said Nabiki.

"Nabiki?" asked the downed man, looking at the woman before him.

"Please get up, Father," said Nabiki, "seeing you down like that is embarrassing."

She couldn't say anymore as she soon found herself in a glomp. "WAH! My daughter's come home! WAH! I'm so happy! WAH! Why's my voice so high?"

Nabiki didn't have time to respond to either as she was dropped as the panda grabbed the man. "Soun, do you realize what this mean?"

"Yes, my family is back together!"

"No, it means Ranma is back." "Now the schools can be joined!" And my crazy ex-wife can't keep us outside anymore.

"Of course, Saotome. Oh, happy days. Quick, go get the priest while I get Akane in her wedding dress!"

"Would you two old fools stop that?" spat Nabiki, as she dusted herself off from meeting the porch. "Ranma is not marrying Akane."

"But Nabiki," begged Soun as he grabbed her by the shoulders, "he has to. Family honor must be satisfied and the schools must be joined!"

Nabiki growled a bit. She had returned after five years of hardly any contact with the exception of her and Kasumi, shown up with a child who literally hit both men in the balls—possibly damaging what feeble minds they had left, and the first thing they do is plan to surprise Ranma—her husband—with a shotgun wedding to Akane. "Father, do you hate me?"

"No, Nabiki-chan," said the man, still holding her by the shoulders.

"Then why are you insisting my husband divorce me and marry Akane?"

"But we don't want you to divorce your husband. We just want Ranma and Akane to get married. After all, they've always been so good together."

Nabiki worked hard to stop the twitch, or continuing to assault the area her daughter had already struck on him. "Father, Ranma and I are already married."

"WAH! Saotome, how could you raise such a boy who would cheat and marry another hussy instead of my wonderful Akane?" cried the aptly named Grandpa Waterfall.

"Oh, how could I have raised such a dishonorable son?" "How could he dump his true love for another woman?"

Unable to take anymore, Nabiki delivered a straight right cross to her Father's face, sending him careening into the panda, and both out the still open front entrance of the Dojo.

Nabiki lowered her hand, trying to concentrate and release her stress at the stupidity of both her Father and Ranma's. Looking up, she was smiling at the fact that her Tendo strength had helped show her displeasure once again. I might not be at Ranma's level, but I can still make my displeasure known.

"Now where the hell am I?"

Blinking, she looked outside the doors once again to see a familiar bandana-clad boy now standing on the patriarch pile. "Ryoga?"

Nabiki stared at the Lost Boy, seeing that he had grown his hair longer, as well as had aged well. It was also then that she remembered that said man was currently married to the very girl the Idiot Duo had just said would marry Ranma.

"Hello?" asked Ryoga.

"It's me, Nabiki."

Ryoga smiled a bit. Surely if he told Akane that he had found her sister, she would be happy.

This happiness turned quickly to depression when he realized he had no idea where he was, and that Akane hadn't been happy to see him since their marriage; simply because he had somehow ended up in the furo, tried to change back, while Akane was soaking.

"Welcome to the Tendo Dojo, little brother," said Nabiki, walking out to the rapidly growing depressed man, and escorting him inside, taking extra care to step on sensitive areas of both parents.

"Tendo Dojo? What are you doing at the Tendo Dojo?" he asked.

Nabiki smiled. "Me and Ranma came to visit our family, introduce our kids," she said, before pulling Ryoga closer.

Her eyes opened, growing with power that promised pain without mercy. "And should you decide to try and strike my husband for some stupid ass reason again, and harm either of my children, I will make you truly see hell, Ryoga. I will do things to you that would turn a demon's stomach, I shall make you crave death to end your suffering, I shall unleash upon you punishments that elude even the sanest of minds. Do you understand?"

Ryoga nodded quickly, not wanting to upset this woman. "Yeah, I ... You and Ranma are married?" he asked, unbelievingly.

Nabiki nodded, taking his arm again. "Have been for four wonderful years. I must say I am glad to see that you finally got over your shyness and married Akane. I always hoped you two would get together when she switched the engagement to me. You two belong with each other."

Ryoga lost all the questions going through his mind as he heard how happy Nabiki was that he had married Akane.

As the entered the Dojo, no one bothered to grab the two drunken fools passed out in the middle of the street.

Trash pickup wouldn't come till tomorrow, anyway.

Ryoga simply stared as Ranma described what had occurred while they were gone, skipping over his involvement with the Saffron incident.

Ryoga just stared in awe at what his rival had been doing since they parted. "I still can't believe you ... a college grad."

Ranma just smiled as she began to add more to the soup that would be for dinner, making certain that there was enough for the now full house, as well as the usual five uninvited guests who would almost always drop in. "Didn't think I'd be the type either when we left here. Just goes to show we weren't as smart as we thought," she giggled. "I still can't believe what happened to the Amazons."

Ryoga chuckled at that. He had been fortunate enough to have been around when Akari had defeated Mousse. "Couldn't have happened to a nicer group."

Ranma nodded. "Who knew the old letch could bring people together?"

Ryoga nodded, but looked outside the kitchen, to see Ranma's daughter talking to her grandmother, Nabiki beside them, nursing Ranma Jr. with a bottle.

Ranma saw what had distracted her friend. "Don't worry; I'm sure you and Akane will work things out."

"You think?"

Ranma smiled. "Well, you didn't tell me to prepare to die when you first saw me, so we've all grown a bit. We'll just set you both down tonight and try and mend those fences." Walking closer to Ryoga, she waved a spoon before him. "And you need to talk to Nabiki and see if she can track down a cure for that directional curse of yours. I speak from experience when I say you'll want to be as close as you can to your children."

Ryoga nodded, remembering parts of his own childhood, wondering where your mother or father was at. If he could, he'd rather wait and see if perhaps he could get cured before having a kid. The last thing he wanted was for his own children to go through what he did.

"We're home," called the voice of the remaining Tendo sister, as Kasumi entered the dining room, her husband beside her, as he walked beside his expecting wife.

Seeing that, only reaffirmed Ryoga's belief that perhaps he and Akane could work things out.

"Oh my, I almost forgot," said Kasumi. "Elder Cologne said she and Shampoo were coming over tonight to talk with you, Auntie."

As the two in the kitchen muttered, "shit," Nodoka smiled as she nodded towards Kasumi. "Thank you, dear; and I think you can call me Mother now, since Nabiki did marry my manly son."

Ranma sighed as she turned back to the soup. "Hey Ryoga, you ever get the feeling that someone up high is just messing around with our lives?"

"Every damn day, Ranma, every damn day."

Cologne sighed as Shampoo biked their way to the dojo. Konatsu had decided to spend his time tidying up the restaurant, as well as prepare for the arrival of Mousse and Akari from her grandfather's, unsure if they would be back by tonight or tomorrow.

She knew the truth; the kunoichi was sensing that Shampoo needed to go alone, in case her first love was there. The boy is too caring for his own good. "Shampoo, we need to talk about your husband."

"Oh, so you do believe Ranma is back?"

"No, Shampoo, Konatsu."

The girl stopped her bike, setting the kickstand so she could talk to her great grandmother. She knew the woman's tone, and also knew she didn't want to end up in the canal from a stray bop to the head. "What do you wish to discuss, honored elder?"

Cologne sighed. She knew her great granddaughter was stubborn, but it was fast reaching even her breaking point for such things. "When we get home tonight, I want you and Konatsu to go out on a date. You have been married for quite some time, and it is past time that you began to accept that."

Shampoo reeled back as if she had been slapped. "But Ranma—"

"Is not here. You have had five years to know your husband. You have not even given Konatsu a chance."

Shampoo glared. "Like you gave him a chance by giving him the Jusenkyo water?"

Cologne sighed. "It was meant to help him come to terms with his nature as male, as well as the female nature his worthless step family drilled into him." She stared into Shampoo's challenging eyes. "They made him think he was not only female, but weak. I worked to correct those false assumptions.

"You however, have yet to even see if feelings are possible between you two."

"I will wait for my first Airen."

Cologne shook her head in sadness. "I should not have allowed this to go on as long as it did, child.

"Shampoo, I know you love Ranma, but you must also see if such emotions are possible with Konatsu. And no, I will not set a simple date limit on the testing of such things.

"Ranma himself may already be wed, and I shall not upset such a thing just so you can continue to chase after him.

"But Amazon Law states—"

Cologne silenced her by bopping her on her head. "That you should not attack a woman with child, unless she strikes at you. Don't try and use the law to justify it, child."

Seeing the girl trying to remain resolved on the issue, Cologne struck further. "Would you strike and try to separate Ranma from his married life, if children have been born?"

Shampoo's eyes widened, before slowly closing, as she tried to stifle tears. "And if we still love each other, should I not follow my heart?"

Cologne shook her head. "Amazon Law states he must challenge Konatsu for your hand. I will not allow such a challenge until after you have sufficiently had time to get to know him, to see if a future of love may be that was as well."

Shampoo's mouth dropped; her eyes wide with surprise. "But, Great-Grandmother ..."

"No buts," said Cologne, rapping her staff on the ground. "While I am proud at you for learning that all matters involve the heart, and therefore must be dealt with as such, you have also failed to learn of how the law works. Furthermore, you have failed to learn what the dual Kisses of Marriage mean in this circumstance. I could have easily dissolved the Kiss of Marriage with Ranma after a year since his disappearance with the Tendo girl.

"Instead, I gave you time, hoping that eventually, you would see if anything more lie with Konatsu. I wanted you to check and see if the love you claimed for the Saotome boy was real, unequalled when tested.

"Sadly, you refused to test those bonds, sequestering yourself in hiding and refusing to even offer a chance to the boy.

"No more, Shampoo. Even if Ranma is at the Dojo, you will behave yourself, and you will test that love with Konatsu. Only when I am satisfied that you have given it a chance, will I release one of them from the Kiss, and only the one who I know will not win your heart as you have won theirs."

Shampoo just stood there, uncertain what she could do now. She did have one last trump to play. "And how am I to know you simply won't dissolve my first Kiss simply to earn favor with Ranma. After all, you and Herb believe he may be the fabled Warrior of Jusenkyo."

Cologne sighed. "You miss the point once again. If I feel you have no future with Ranma, I shall dissolve that Kiss, the same with Konatsu should I feel that future is bleak as well.

"In effect, you could wind up with no Airen when this is over."

Shampoo wanted to protest, but knew she had no ground to challenge her great-grandmother's words. So, I either find I have no future with Konatsu, or with Ranma.

Why must this happen to me? Why must my heart always be the one to suffer?

Finally, they walked the remainder of the way to the Tendo Dojo, each deep in thoughts of what to do now.

Soon, they arrived, the aromas of the meal already reaching their noses, wondering if whatever had been made would go well with the food they brought with them.

Cologne hoped that it was a great sign that Nodoka's mood was better than it had been, since yesterday was the anniversary of her son's departure on the training journey. After all, she needed to gauge the woman to see if they could still be friends, should a relationship between the former Saotome and the Musk Prince develop into something more.

Given that, it was understandable that she was shocked speechless when they knocked on the door, to have it opened by the missing boy.

He stood taller before them, his pigtail down his back and nearly at his waist. He still wore his standard silk shirt, black pants, and slippers he had always been seen in when he roamed this Ward.

And even though a red bandana with a yin-yang symbol emblazoned on it might have confused them a bit, it didn't distract them enough to realize who this person before them was.

"AIREN!" cried Shampoo, glomping onto Ranma as if her life depended on it, crying as she hugged him for all she was worth.

Cologne just shook her head. The more things change ... the more they stay the same.

I really am getting too old for this shit.