Secret Service 13!

Wow, I thought I'd never be good enough to have a GUEST AUTHOR CHAPTER! Whoo! I own not Zelda, but I do own legal rights to a ball of lint.

After a while, Skull Kid forgave Link for pissing on his head, and Link kept on bitching on about how Screw-up brand popcorn was pretty much destroyed. A few months later, Skull Kid was in Link's house, being his roommate.

"Oh, I say." Said Skull Kid in a British accent, sipping some wine, wearing a top hat, "I do so enjoy my quiet time before Link gets home."

"Skull Kid! I'm home!" Said a voice from the door.

"Oh, dammit. I was about to uncork the Champaign." Skull Kid then proceeded to hide the wine, Champaign, top hat, and really fancy 18th century chair he was sitting on.

"I brought over a friend! From the land of PEARS!" Screamed Link.

"Hi! I'm Vivi! THE ELF!" screamed the new character, staring at Skull Kid, "And I have the power to… move you…"

A single spotlight fell apon Vivi, nearly hitting her, and then a spotlight's light fell on her, and she took out a guitar.

'bling, twang twingsle' went the guitar.

Vivi then proceeded to smash the guitar onto Skull Kid's head. "Move!" cried out Vivi, pointing over to the corner.

"Ya, okay." Said Skull Kid weakly, crawling over to the corner.

"She's great, isn't she?" said Link.

"I AM A HOBIR"

screamed a voice from the door. It's a muffin!

"Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh!" screamed Vivi

Then Vivi woke up.

"Holy crap, that was a weird dream! You were there, Link! You too, Skull Kid!" Said Vivi from her bed, the camera panning out, showing Link and Skull Kid laying in bed with her.

"Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh!" screamed Vivi

Then Vivi woke up.

"Holy, shit, that was weird! I gotta stop eating popcorn before bed! Said Vivi, waking up, the camera panning out, showing Link, Vivi, and Skull Kid laying in a giant bowl of popcorn.

"You got that right!" screamed Skull Kid!

"Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh!" screamed Vivi

Then Vivi woke up.

"Dammit, I really gotta stop eating frog legs before bed! Seriously!" Said Vivi from her bed, the camera panning out showing Link and Skull Kid in her bed with her.

"You got that right!" screamed Skull Kid, holding a bunch of balloons.

"Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhh!" screamed Vivi.

"… Are you done yet?" asked Skull Kid, looking at Vivi, handing her a balloon.

"Ya." Said Vivi, taking the balloon, "Hey guys, I had the weirdest dream, where you guys and I were in a bed and-"

"Was I shagging you?" asked Skull Kid, smiling.

"No."

"Aww…"

"Anyways, I would scream, and wake up, and… wait a minute… What are you guys doing in my bed anyways?"

Skull Kid and Link looked at each other nervously, and took off.

"Damn right you run! Don't make me take out my smashing guitar, Skull Kid!"

Later, Vivi got out of bed, and walked outside.

"Ah, what a beautiful day!" she declared, walking around Kokiri Forrest, "The birds are chirping, the sun is shining, and Mido is getting the living shit beat out of him. Nope. Nothing new. Better check out who is punching Mido."

Vivi walked over to Mido, who was pleading to someone.

"Please stop! I won't – OW – hit on Saria again! OW! I promise!'

Screamed Mido, struggling to get out of a headlock.

"Damn right. Say away from here, or I'll eat you." Said the mysterious figure, mysteriously.

"Who are you?" asked Vivi, slowly taking her waking guitar out of her abnormally large pocket.

"I am… … …" said the figure.

"Well, who are you, bitch?" screamed Link, who was walked out from behind Vivi.

Who is this mysterious figure? Who did Link get there? Will Skull Kid get there, too? Will the dynamic duo escape the clutches of The Joker? Find out next time, same bat time, same bat channel!

But really guys, sorry for the long update time, and the short story. It was a mistake to try to worm in two guest authors in the same story. I have tests and homework, and not any inspiration. I'll try to get the next chapter in after January, as my final exams are coming up soon. I might start it during x-mas break, but I can't in January, as I'll have to study non-stop.

Ya, I think I'm going to take a break from trying to come up with this crap. See you in February!

Evil D Man

(Oh, and I'm free for MSN messenger!)