Lindsey's words haunted her ever since their little confrontation earlier. Sitting on the same spot in the middle of Willow's couch, basically the same place she'd been for twenty-four hours, a pile of squished up Kleenex next to her, she blew her nose as she contemplated everything that happened… and all the possibilities that the future may hold.

Her heart was shattered, she was utterly broken, confused, and to top it off she was beyond exhausted. As much as it gutted her to admit, although he was harsh, some of what Lindsey said wasn't wrong.

The few moments she had spoken with Angel, she'd still been so angry and confused, she had hardly let him get a word in edgewise, and what he had managed to get out she didn't pay too much attention to, too caught up in her own frustrations. She had no idea about the drugs or the fact that he had a rape examination done. Though she did find a bit of comfort knowing Darla was behind bars, where she would hopefully stay, her already broken heart, ached even more for her husband.

She more than anyone should understand what he was going through, but she just didn't have the mental capacity to go there right now.

A part of her wondered if Lindsey had been right, if they really were just as toxic as Darla when they were together. Their relationship certainly hadn't proved to be an easy one, no matter how hard they tried, they always seemed to hurt one another.

Her heart kept telling her that she knew Angel would never intentionally betray her in that way, but her mind just couldn't seem to shake the images. After their last big fight she had sworn to herself that she would never allow herself to sink back into those old habits of allowing herself to believe any of that wicked woman's lies, promised herself that she would never again throw anything in his face regarding that witch, that another accusation would never cross her lips.

Maybe he would be better off without her, maybe Lindsey was right that she didn't deserve him. Maybe there was something wrong her, maybe she really was the fucking poison here.

Obviously Angel hadn't deserved her anger earlier, but she just needed a little bit of time to process everything, to figure out a way to apologize to him, to come to terms with what happened, to think over everything Lindsey had said. But first and foremost she needed sleep, the exhaustion and stress from the last two days had finally begun to catch up to her, her back was killing her, and if she were being totally honest her stomach was a bit more crampy than she was comfortable with.

Opening her phone, she stared once more at the last words he'd sent her. Tears once again falling from her eyes, she pressed the call button without giving herself time to second guess her action, maybe they could actually have a conversation now that her anger had subsided. Unfortunately, he seemed to have turned his phone off, perhaps Angel already agreed with what Lindsey had told her.

Her courage diminished, she quickly ended the call before his voicemail came on.

Curling onto her side, she fluffed one of the extra pillows between her knees as she tried to get comfortable on the leather sofa. Closing her eyes, she tried her best to forget the last few days, as she finally drifted off into an exhausted slumber.

OoOoO

Lindsey was fucking furious with that little bitch, he'd been driving around for over an hour just trying to calm himself down before going back to the house. He had no intention of telling Angel where he had been, if she told him then he wouldn't deny a damn thing, but as far as he was concerned his friend had been through enough. He needed to find a way to convince Angel to get the hell out of here, he'd proven time and again that he was one hell of a stand up man, and husband, he deserved the same in return, which sadly Buffy had proven time and again she just wasn't capable of being.

Of course the baby was going to complicate matters, but there were hundreds of single Dads who were still actively involved in their kids' life. It may not be the type of parenthood Angel envisioned, but sometimes these types of things were just out of one's control.

Stopping by the local office supply warehouse, Lindsey purchased as many boxes as he thought would fit in the back of his truck. Canceling his flight, he finally went back to the house to wait for Angel to wake up. The sooner he could convince him to get the hell out of here the better, the less contact he had with that manipulative ass wife of his, the better.

He fucking loved Buffy damn't, but she swore, she fucking swore that he could trust her not to destroy his friend again. Slamming his fists into the steering wheel, he fought the urge to scream. It had never been clearer that it was all just a bunch of selfish ass lies on her part. Hindsight was twenty-twenty, but had he listened to his gut, he would have done everything in his fucking power to talk some sense into Angel that night long ago when he'd first called about their reconciliation.

Pulling up into the driveway, he made sure to leave all of the boxes and packing tape in his rental for now. Thankfully the house was still quiet as he stepped inside, in all honesty he was hoping Angel would just go ahead and sleep through the night, though he figured it was doubtful. Still, he needed him to be level headed when he sat him down, he knew Angel wasn't going to walk away from that baby easily but hopefully Lindsey had already come up with a solution for that as well.

Everyone knew that he knew people, he had his sources and some of them just happened to owe him some favors. He'd already put a call into one of the best divorce/child custody attorneys in the state, all Angel had to do was confirm with him, sign a few documents, and they could have Buffy served with divorce papers within a month's time.

OoOoO

It was nearly three am before Angel forced his heavy eyelids open, taking in the time he couldn't believe how long he'd been out for. For the smallest moment, for just a fraction of a second, his arms reached out in search of his wife's warm body, until the crushing reality of the past few days flooded his mind.

Choking back the urge to panic, he jumped up from the bed making it to the toilet just in time to upheave what little bile remained in his stomach. Resting his head against the cool white porcelain of the commode, he once again couldn't stop the onslaught of emotions, suddenly tearing him through him. Slumping down into a heap, he rested against the hard tile floor, for the first time since they had met, this was the last place in the world Angel found himself wanting to be.

Even when they were at their worst, this house had always remained home in his mind, he might have wanted to put some space between he and Buffy at times but it was always with the intent to return. Now, he felt dirty inside of these walls, it felt wrong to be here, and he was certain there was nothing to change that.

Angel remained laying there, emotions just pounding into him one after another, his mind racing as he tried to figure out what he was supposed to now.

OoOoO

Lindsey wasn't sure what it was that woke him up, but his eyes fluttered and he moved a little in the chair he'd taken to fall asleep in, settling on the image of Angel just standing off to the side again, his eyes trained on the spot where the couch used to be. He groaned as he pulled himself up more and cracked his neck before standing up.

"Come on," he told Angel, leading him away from the living room.

He instructed Angel to take a seat at the dining room table, flicking on a few lights as they moved. He wasn't sure Angel would or even could eat let alone keep anything down but he figured he ought to at least try. First, he got him a glass of cold ice water before fluttering around the kitchen to see what he could make without taking a lot of time and effort.

Angel remained quiet until he'd sat them each a plate down and he came back to the table with a drink for himself. Angel quietly filled him in about the calls he'd gotten from the police station, including the latest voicemail which had asked him to swing by tomorrow if he had a chance.

Lindsey just nodded before trying to encourage him to take at least a few bites of something.

Then, he was surprised again when Angel sat his half eaten sandwich down and confessed he didn't think he could stay here. Suddenly, it seemed maybe it wouldn't be so hard to convince him to leave this shithole town behind.

"She's not going to get past this," Angel told him, his eyes cast downward at his plate. "I keep trying to think of how I could fix this and there's just nothing there. Even if she knew or believed that it wasn't my doing... even if she someday was able to forgive me or something... I don't think it would matter, you know. She's going to always have those memories and images imprinted on her brain. That's just what keeps cycling around in my head... that it doesn't matter, that's all she's ever going to see."

With a sigh, he stood up and walked across the dining room back into the kitchen to find them something much stronger than water to get through this conversation. "I would love to be able to argue that with you," he answered, setting the new glass down by Angel before returning to his seat and placing the bottle in the middle of the table between them. "But sadly... I don't think you got another way around it. Not on this."

Angel nodded a little. "I can't stay in this house. It's her house first of all, and I just... I don't want to be here. I feel like I can't breathe and everywhere I look... it's like Darla is everywhere now and tainted the whole fucking place."

Lindsey sat back for a moment. "I think you need to be out of this fucking town." Angel finished his second shot and nodded. "What do you think about coming to Oklahoma?"

"Oklahoma?"

"Yeah. Get the hell away from here, get a fresh start, even if for a little while. Figure out where you really want to be and want to do next." He'd really hoped to have slept on this plan and come at it tomorrow with his whole argument ready to go but middle of the night flash sale wasn't bad either.

"What about the baby?" he finally asked after thinking it over. "I can't just leave."

"How involved do you think Buffy is going to let you be now? Not fucking at all. So, why not get out of here, get your shit straightened out, maybe even get settled somewhere before the baby is even born. You couldn't get anything written in your favor right now really anyway, not until there's a living, breathing child out in the actual world on its own so once that does happen you can get whatever legal documentation you need done. You can figure out some schedule that works for you to see the child, even if you are states away. I know with some time and effort you could get shit figured out."

"She's probably going to ask me to sign my rights away or who knows what," Angel said sadly.

"If she has any fucking sense in that head of hers she will know better than to try and pull something. I can't promise you it'll be ideal because we all know it's already not, but... I think it's your best option. Start the fuck over, when the time comes get on the ball and make sure you have as much time as you can with that little girl, and just figure it out as you go."

"A judge isn't going to be okay with a tiny baby going back and forth halfway across the country."

"Maybe, maybe not, but there are other options to explore, too. Maybe you have a secondary home set up back out here for your time at first, until she is older. Hell, stay in a hotel. Something. I am sure a lawyer and the power of me and you thinking up ideas we could figure some damn options out to take before a judge when the time comes."

He took another drink and seemed to be thinking it over some more.

"You don't have anything else keeping you here. At least come stay with me so I know that you're alright. There's no one else out here really and I'd rather you be with family and that's pretty much me. We can pack up what you want whenever you're ready... rent like a small U-Haul or something and just fucking go, put some damn miles between us and this fucking town. You can always come back as you need to... need to provide something in court or to the police or something and you can just take a flight right back out and turn around when you're done."

OoOoO

Angel wasn't sure how exactly Lindsey landed him a meeting this quickly with a lawyer, but it also didn't surprise him when he happened to bring it up after he'd signed a few more statements with the detective. He'd yet to hear any "bad" news regarding the situation with Darla and that was about the only good thing he had going. Apparently the more they dug into the fucking bitch, the more they were able to find. He'd just be glad when he could be done with her and the entire situation… for good.

His stomach churned once again as he sat and listened to the Lawyer discuss all of the possibilities he could be facing. Explaining that if his intent was to divorce then he highly recommended filing before there was a child involved. Doing things this way he could knock out the divorce now, and have a temporary custody order put into place for a few months before they fully took that battle on. He told him that should he wait until after the baby was born to file, then they would be facing a whole slew of obstacles. What would be a fairly simple divorce now, should Buffy not contest it of course, could turn into a year or more long battle once there was a baby here.

He felt as though he had whiplash from everything that had happened in the last two days. At some point after his talk with Lindsey, he'd simply shut off, running solely on auto-pilot, he couldn't allow himself to process anything that he was supposed to be feeling right now, all he felt was numb.

The last thing he wanted to do was look back on this with any regrets, but in his soul he already knew his marriage was over. He certainly didn't want things to end up being dragged out for over a year, neither of them deserved that torment. He honestly wasn't sure what else the lawyer had said as he filled out the stack of paperwork, signing and initialing his name what felt like dozens of times.

When he was finally done, and written out a check for the retainer fee, his new lawyer Mr. Goldstein assured him that should they need anything further there wouldn't be a problem sending the documents over remotely, Lindsey having already informed him about his particular situation. He also walked him through how the process would work, Angel having not had it in him to tell him that they had already been through this once before. So he only half listened as he explained that once everything was filed with the courts, a constable would serve Buffy with papers, the whole process taking between two and three weeks depending on how backlogged the courts were at the time. If they were lucky and Buffy didn't contest anything, he had faith that they could get everything finalized before the baby arrived, barring any premature deliveries of course.

OoOoO

After their trip to the police station and the lawyers office, Lindsey had made quick work of getting them back to the house. From the second they pulled into the driveway, it seemed as though they'd both entered a mad dash to just get his shit and get the hell out of there. As soon as Angel was done loading a box, Lindsey was carrying it downstairs to put in the truck.

He hadn't taken much, mainly just his clothes, shoes, his laptop, and a few other personal belongings that he didn't want to leave behind. He had done his best to avoid the little door on the left each time he passed it as he went to and from their room, though once everything was loaded, he told Lindsey to give him just a minute as he ran back up the stairs.

Slowly stepping inside, he tried to keep his emotions in check, to hold onto that overwhelming numbness that had somehow gotten him through this day. Yet as he picked up the white frame that read Daddy's Girl from the dresser, he nearly choked as he took in the outline of his daughter. A part of him feeling as though, despite everything, he was abandoning her in some way.

She may not be considered a living being yet to the rest of the world, but to him she was all he had left. Taking one last look around the room, he carried the picture down with him as he left the house, sliding it into the glovebox, to ensure it didn't break, he quickly climbed into the passenger seat, needing to put as much space as possible between himself and this town.

He watched unblinking as Lindsey put the car in reverse and backed out of the drive away, away from his home, away from his life, once again he looked in the rear view as he left everything that had ever meant anything to him behind.

OoOoO

She'd been debating all day long as to what she should do, she'd finally been able to get a few hours of sleep in, the night before, but she still felt awful. She wanted to go home, she needed to go home, she hadn't tried to call Angel all day, too scared of what his reaction would be. However, it wasn't like they could go on ignoring each other forever, despite what Lindsey said they were still husband and wife.

"Do you think one of you could take me home?" Buffy asked, her voice cracking, from her perch in the living room.

Willow's eyes shot up to meet her own, "Buffy, are you sure?"

Nodding her head, she prayed that her friends wouldn't question her too much about her decision right now. She wasn't sure she had the strength for it, besides she was positive once she got home it was going to be a long night. She knew they each had a lot of things that needed to be said, her especially.

OoOoO

The first thing she noticed was the couch, and then one of their lounge chairs, now broken and rain soaked, pulled out next to the curb. Shaking her head she desperately tried to shake the mental images her mind attempted to create as to why that chair was out there too.

Pushing the thought from her head, she tried to remind herself that it didn't matter, he'd gotten rid of the furniture and that was all she cared about. She didn't want anything in their home that reminded either of them about that cursed woman, or what she had done.

Angel's car was in the driveway, but whatever rental Lindsey had been driving was strangely missing, briefly she wondered if they had run to the store for something, or maybe the universe had decided to give her a break and Lindsey had simply gone home. Though she already knew that wasn't likely, he'd expressed his feelings quite honestly, and he certainly didn't seem as though he was in the mindset to just take off and leave Angel all alone.

Pulling into the driveway, she'd half expected one of them to be rushing out the front door as soon as they saw her. When that didn't happen, she slowly approached her front door, pushing all memories from the last time she had done this as far from her mind as possible. Fishing her keys out of her bag, she unlocked the door, stepping inside, she flicked on the light switches and slowly ventured further into the house, trying her best to make sense of the sight before her.

There were a couple of boxes scattered about the nearly empty living room, a pair of scissors sat on the coffee table next to two separate rolls of packing tape. She quickly felt the panic begin to nip and tug at her. 'He couldn't have left, he can't be gone again,' she thought as she walked deeper into the house, her eyes still trained on the items splayed about on the table.

"Angel?" she barely managed to call out, her body already starting to move away from the living room to check the rest of the downstairs for any sign of the boys. She tried again, a little louder but still no answer. "Lindsey?" she attempted next. With one hand going to her stomach, the other held onto the railing for the staircase so she could check the top level, though by now she was already sure she knew what to expect.

With the first glance into their bedroom, Buffy felt her heart wanting to lurch its way out of her chest all the same however. Expecting it was certainly one thing, seeing proof of it all was another. "No, no, no," she whispered as her eyes took in the empty hangers left behind in the closet, the slightly open drawer to his large dresser that now held nothing inside of it, his phone and laptop chargers gone from beside the bed, a few odd items from around the room, those boxes of some of his things from childhood he'd kept in the corner of his closet missing...

She had tears flowing freely as she looked in the other areas of the upper level, the bathroom was only missing a handful of items that she could tell sticking her head inside quickly, his office was even more or less the same other than what she knew he valued the most from in here such as his laptop, the safe he kept, and a file with an endless amount of important papers he had.

As she walked into the nursery she could only spot the one picture gone and that seemed to be her undoing. Her body shook as loud cries began falling from her lips, and she slowly sunk down to the floor unable to hold herself up any longer.

"Buffy?" she heard Willow's voice call out a matter of minutes later. "I didn't want to go ahead and leave in case... I mean... I want to make sure you're okay?" Buffy couldn't even answer her, so it was a few more moments before she felt the small redhead in the doorway. "Oh, Buffy," she whispered, coming to her quickly and trying to comfort her.

OoOoO

No longer gasping for air, but silent tears still rolling down her face, Willow brought in the two items she'd spotted on the bed earlier. One looked like more forms from the police or something, the other a note Angel had obviously left her. Buffy shook her head when Will offered it to her and she'd only frowned, putting it to the side. Then, with a nod of permission, Willow began peeking through some of what else had been left behind. She hoped in these would be some sort of miracle to help her friend feel better, to fix this giant mess that she was still lost about her own self so couldn't even begin to imagine what Buffy was truly feeling or thinking right now.

When she began to look rather green around the gills, Buffy had some help sitting up and dared to ask what it was. Willow had a small debate inside of her head but she knew sooner or later it'd all come out anyway, so with a sigh and a slight frown she held up a couple of the pages and began by saying it showed Angel had a mixture of drugs found in his system and a loose explanation which she had already gotten from Lindsey... she just hadn't filled Willow and Tara or anyone else in on that just yet, still trying to process it all her own self. Willow then went on to mention a few new bits of information, like how Darla had apparently admitted to going hard into this ruse of trying to make him think she was Buffy at the time.

Buffy thought she might throw up as Willow read off some of the details about how Darla had gone to the same stores she often shopped at to buy similar clothes, lotions and so forth, hell she had even gone to the same hairstylist... the one she'd nearly been killed after being at.

"There's evidence of..." Willow started to continue but Buffy shook her head. There was only so much she could deal with at a time and she was already well past that limit.

Willow put the large folder down and reached over to hold Buffy's hand. "I know Angel hurt you," she said softly, "But I don't think he meant to," Willow told her. Truthfully, Willow and all of them really had been having a hard time accepting that any of this even happened. It just didn't make sense. Now, the clearer of an image she was getting as to what happened the more she felt like she wanted to fall apart right beside her blonde best friend.

Buffy nodded, her eyes pooling up again. "I didn't know any of this at the time... and I still don't even know how to deal with it, Wil."

Willow wished she had an answer. "D-did he really leave?"

Buffy nodded again. "H-his stuff is m-missing," she choked out. "And I'm s-sure that s-stupid note is a g-goodbye," she said, grabbing it back up.

OoOoO

They'd been on the road for a couple hours when Angel felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. With a sigh, he pulled it out and stopped all movement once he saw her name on the screen. His eyes looked back out the windshield to see if Lindsey was coming back out from the gas station yet before pulling it up to his ear. "Hello?"

"What the hell am I supposed to do?!"

Angel stilled. That hadn't exactly been any of the statements or questions he'd practiced for and simply hearing her voice right now set him on edge, especially as he could hear the mixture of anger and hurt in her voice on the other end. "I don't know," he finally said to her.

"You just left?"

He sucked in a breath. "I couldn't be in that house, Buffy," he told her, keeping his voice as soft and calm as he could manage. "I didn't think... I didn't think you would want me there," he added.

Buffy was silent after that and he let his head fall back to the headrest. "I'm supposed to be taking things easy, on a modified bed rest, I'm not supposed to stand for long periods of times or bend much or lift things. I can't drive or... or a million other things..."

"Do you want me there?" he shot back.

"No!" she quickly replied, then, "I don't know, Angel. I didn't expect you to just be fucking gone."

"I'm just trying to do the right thing by everybody, Buffy. I am sure one of your friends would happily let you stay with them or they will rally together to create some sort of schedule to make sure you have everything you need. I-," he stopped talking as her voice once again rose over his. "So what, you just thought it was easier to walk away from your very pregnant wife, and soon to be daughter, and now I'm just supposed to deal?"

She listened to the silence on the other end of the line, unable to process that he had just left her like this, without so much as a word. "Do I atleast get to know where you're going?" she questioned when he still hadn't responded.

"Lindsey's," he managed, his already broken heart crumbling. He heard her gasp as she took in a sharp intake of breath, apparently not expecting to hear that.

"Are you coming back?" she breathed out, terrified of what his answer might be. No matter what, she simply couldn't imagine a reality where he wasn't there for their daughter's birth.

Squeezing his eyes shut, he fought with everything he had to deaden his emotions, he couldn't go there, couldn't think about the weight of the words that were about to fall from his lips. "I don't think so," he finally managed, his entire body trembling all over again.

She felt like she was going to vomit, her heart felt like it had dropped to the bottom of her stomach. She couldn't believe this was really happening all over again, she'd been wrong, she knew that, but she was coming home to fix things, she was coming home because she knew despite everything he needed her...and he was abandoning her when she was at her most vulnerable.

"And what about the baby Angel, am I just supposed to call you when I go into labor, or would you rather not knowing until after she's here?" she spat, anger once again getting the best of her.

Angel hadn't even noticed that Lindsey was already back in the truck next to him, nearly jumping out of his skin when he felt him pluck his phone from his hands, watching completely defeated as Lindsey put the phone to his own ear.

Buffy had been talking loud enough that he could hear every word she said, apparently she was too fucking to selfish to realize just how badly Angel had been affected by all this. He should have known they weren't going to have time to make it to Oklahoma before she figured it out.

"After's perfect princess, as a matter of fact, why don't you just shoot him a text," Lindsey all but growled into the phone, powering the damn thing off and sliding it into his own pocket.

ButImBroken:

Written with the ammmaaaazzzing Scribes1015!