A/N: I would just like to tell all of you that the ideas for articles three and four were taken from fellow reviewers. I just kind of… screwed them up…
Vital Source Of Water Considered Threat.
By Jonathan Summers
In Kakariko Village, there is only one noted source of water, and that is the well located in the back of the village proper.
The well, which has been used for more than one hundred years, was recently sealed with a stone lid to keep the citizens from drawing water? The reason? Contamination.
The Kakariko Village well isn't like all of the other wells located around Hyrule. It is constantly fed by a windmill, which keeps water pumping into the pit for up to twenty hours. At certain periods of the day, the windmill will stop or speed up, and all water will drain from the well until the windmill resumes its normal cycle. The citizens know this, and their lives rotate around the cycles of the windmill. They gather water in many large buckets just incase the windmill should stop when they need water most.
Yesterday, while the windmill had stopped completely, an inconspicuously placed Little Timmy was playing with an equally inconspicuously placed rubber ball, which bounced off of the ground and into the well, hitting the dry floor with a pat. Little Timmy, who had been cautioned by his mother to stay away from the well, patiently sat down and waited for the windmill to start working again. This way, the water would push the ball up to the surface, and Timmy would be able to resume playing.
After a short five seconds of waiting, his ball returned to him, but not because of rising water level. The ball bounded out of the hole as if someone, or something, had thrown it back up to him. Little Timmy, scared out of his mind (to say the least), left the ball where it was and ran screaming to his mom.
Timmy's mother, a woman named Angela, contacted Kakariko authorities and asked them to investigate. While the well was still drained, the guards climbed to the bottom of the pit and observed the situation with some horrible and dimly lit candles. However, what they could barely see shocked them.
There, in front of them, was a ReDead, an undead creature known for its paralyzing scream and fatal bite. The guards quickly dropped the candles and left the well, leaving the ReDead to wonder what in the world had just happened.
It was later reported to Angela that Little Timmy's ball had been returned to him by a ReDead, who probably did not like having strange and foreign objects invade his well. They later told curious villagers that there was nothing to worry about, for experiments proved that ReDeads seldom left their original habitat.
However, this brought no peace to the frightened villagers. They were still getting their water from down there.
It was then realized by scientist Paul Druckhammer that the water from the well may be the reason behind Kakariko's high death rate.
"Several of my fellow scientists took a sample of water from the well in Kakariko," explained Druckhammer. "After analysis, the water showed to contain several small bacterial organisms."
Kakariko has suffered from a pandemic known as sophistiosis, a disease from an unknown source that caused its victim to grow very sick and eventually die. Now that bacteria have been found in the well, scientists have no doubt in their minds that this is the source of the deadly disease.
"Sophistiosis does not affect everyone," explained Druckhammer. "People who have lived in Kakariko for the majority of their lives have built immunity to the disease. In a matter of speaking, it's just like drinking the water in Mexico, except this stuff will actually kill you."
Now that the well in Kakariko has been sealed by Princess Zelda, villagers are frightened as to what they will do to get their water. Princess Zelda made an appearance in the village and delivered a speech.
"Fellow inhabitants of Hyrule," she began. "I simply ask you: Dude, what? There's a river outside of your own village. Get your water from there, like the rest of us. Thank you."
Princess Zelda was later recognized as a savior to the village.
It's events like this that make this reporter wonder if sophistiosis is the only side effect you get from drinking water in Kakariko…
Copyright April Hylian Times