AN: Andrew is CeeCee's new boyfriend. Adam will come in later.

Booze and Broken Things

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot.

The next two weeks were brutal, not only for Jesse due to him recording the record, but for me also because I had seen Jesse only a few times the past two weeks, usually if I wake up early enough in the morning. He stayed late at the studio too. Humph! I'm being selfish again. Dammit Suze! Get a hold of yourself! Once Jesse's done with recording, you and him will get all the time in the-wait, he'll be going on tour and that means like one or two months away from him. Great, maybe this whole music business isn't what I thought it was in the beginning. From the beginning, I thought, "Oh wow, I'll get to go to parties and meet famous people and sip the finest wine everyday and-and-" God, what was I thinking! Being famous isn't all it's cracked up to be.

"Susannah!" I sat up on the couch as Jesse came home on the final day of recording at around midnight. I was so happy that it was over. I ran up to him and wrapped my arms around his neck, giving him a great, big kiss. That's when an awful smell filled my nostrils. I looked Jesse up and down.

"Oh God," I whispered to myself. He was drunk. "Jesse, w-what happened to you?" I was so angry, confused and at the edge of tears.

"W-what d-do you mean 'what h-happened' to me?" His words were slurred and he was wobbling.

"Jesse, you're drunk." Oh God, what am I suppose to do? He promised, ever since he got the record contract that he'd never drink do drugs or any of that stuff and now here he is, drunk.

"I'm not drunk, querida." He came over and tried to kiss me. I pushed him away. He pressed me against the wall.

"Please Jesse, this isn't like you." I full on started to cry.

"I'M NOT DRUNK!" He shouted this time.

"Stop, please Jesse you're hurting me." He was, my left wrist was getting crushed by his hand. He let go of me, I fell to the floor, cradling my wrist and crying. He was fuming and stomped around.

"Stop crying! You're giving me a headache!" He banged his fist to the wall, creating a hole. I stopped crying immediately, sitting there, I didn't know what to do. Should I call the cops? Or my mom? Jesse treaded heavily to the bathroom and locked himself in there. I could hear him vomiting.

I wanted to help him, really I did. But the pain in my wrist was excruciating as seconds went by. "All I have to do is wrap it in an Ace bandage and it'll be better," I thought to myself as I went into our bedroom and started to look through the drawers. Finding one, I started to wrap it around my left wrist, wincing ever time I touched my wrist. God, I wanted to crawl in a hole and die. What made Jesse be like this? Of course it was the booze, but he hurt me. I know he'd never hurt a fly. I sat on the bed, my knees to my chest, crying. I didn't want to cry loudly because I feared what Jesse would do to me.

When I fell asleep, which was around two, Jesse was still in the bathroom.

I had a dream, a horrible one. There were two Jesse's, one was the sober one and the other was the drunken one. The drunken one kept hurting me and he had the sober Jesse tied up somewhere. I could hear the sober Jesse's pleas for the drunken one to stop. The sober one said that they both loved me. But I was getting the crap beating out of me by the drunken one. With my last breath, I found myself in the arms of sober Jesse, he was crying.

Then I woke up, I was tangled in the sheets, sweaty and breathing heavily. I heard querida. Jesse was sleeping next to me, peacefully. I couldn't breathe, I wanted to get out. I wanted to relive that whole night over. I want Jesse to come home sober and happy to see me. Jesse stirred. I hope he isn't drunk still. "Querida?" He sat up, suddenly in clutched his head in pain. "Querida, can you get me aspirin?" I went to the bathroom and open the medicine cabinet. Clutching the tiny bottle in my hand, I gave Jesse two. He swallowed them without water.

"A-Are you okay?" I asked timidly.

"I'll be fine, querida." I nodded. I felt so awkward around him.

"I can't remember a thing about last night- what happened to your wrist?" He said alarmed.

"I-ahh-I hit it against something. I'll be fine." I didn't know why I didn't tell him "you were drunk and did this." I guess I just didn't want him to feel guilty. "I'll go make breakfast." All I wanted was to get out of that room. It was like that was something sucking the air out of me and I couldn't take anymore of it.

My hands were shaking, I couldn't control them. I was getting a glass from a high shelf and it fell with a loud clang. It broke into a million pieces. I got down on my knees and started to pick up the shards when Jesse came in. "Querida, what happened?" He took my hands in his and stood me up. My fingers were red with cuts and blood.

"Just an accident, that's all," I said, not looking into his eyes. He noticed how much my hands were shaking in his.

"Do you need a doctor?"

"No, no. Just cold, yeah cold that's all." It was, rain was pelting at the windows.

"Well, then you go take a nice, long, warm shower and I'll clean up and make breakfast. Okay?" All I did was nod.

I got into the shower and turned the dial. The water washed over as stream rose from the heat. I spent a good twenty minutes in there, just trying to wash all the events of last night away. After I got dressed and wrapped my wrist, breakfast was waiting for me in the kitchen. Jesse was sitting at the table, sipping coffee and reading the morning newspaper. I sat tentatively across from him and started to pile food unto my plate.

It was pretty silent for a few minutes except for the sound of me chewing. "Querida, what is wrong, tell me. You have been acting strange all morning. Please tell me. Did someone hurt you? Is that why your wrist is like that?" I panicked. I didn't want him to know he did it.

"I told you," I chose my words carefully. "I hurt my wrist because I banged it against something."

"That doesn't explain the jitteriness." He got me there. I had to think quickly. Think quick Suze, think quickly.

"Y-You were drunk," I whispered. I couldn't look at him in the eye. "And, y-you pinned me to the wall and-and-" I exploded into tears. Jesse sat there, a stunned look on his face. Tears welled up in his eyes.

"Querida." He couldn't speak. I wanted him to hold me. I wanted him to comfort me. But how can he when he was the one that hurt me so much, not only physical, but mentally? He got up and started to walk to the door.

"Wait, where are you going!"

"Querida, how could you even talk to me, let alone look at me."

"But I want you here," I pleaded with him.

"Querida, I need to think things through." Then he left before I could protest. I wanted him to hold me. I wanted him to comfort me.

Dying, was it so bad? I mean, I get to go somewhere much better then earth and-and I'll get to see dad again. God, sometimes I wish he was still here on earth. Ghost or human, I wanted to talk to him so bad, especially at times like this when I couldn't even talk to Jesse.

I look at the clock that hung in the kitchen. "Dammit." I had work in twenty minutes. Checking myself in the mirror, I wiped the last of the remaining tears and left. Being a Monday, the museum was pretty busy with school tours and what-not. Getting to my office, I submitted the report on Darwin and continued with some other work I needed to finish.

"Suze, Jodie wanted to have these copied and-what happened to your hands?" Marty asked, staring ay them. "And your wrist?"

"Nothing," I said, covering my wrist with my sleeve. I couldn't really do anything about my hands.

"O…Kay. Well, like I said Jodie wanted these papers to be copied-"

"We're not her assistants," I said, reminding Marty. Jodie, however, was head of the history department.

"And she's not our boss," she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. I sighed in defeat.

"Put them on that pile," I said, staring back at my computer screen. She placed them there and left.

After work, I didn't want to go home. Not that I can't call it home anymore so I decided to buy potatoes, broccoli, and carrots which we were running low on at the time.

Parking in the lot next to a Farmer's Market, I grabbed a basket and started to look around. I was reaching for some potatoes when a hand hit mine. "Sorry…Adam?"

"Hey Suze." It was Adam, I hadn't seen him since CeeCee and he broke up six months ago.

"How have you been Adam, how's the firm?" Adam was a lawyer. That was part of the reason why CeeCee and he broke up.

"It's great. You remember Paul right?"

"How could I forget?" I asked lamely.

"He works at the firm now." I raised my brow.

"He does?"

"Yeah, you know he's a great guy. He's changed since high school which is surprising." I laughed. After more conversing, we said our good-byes and went to our separate ways. It was great talking to Adam, it took my mind off Jesse for a while. When I got home, Jesse wasn't there and it was already ten at night. I stored the vegetables in the fridge.

I wish Jesse was here.