The reviews rock my socks guys thank you This chapters kind of short and introduces the beginning of the Mark/Roger based flashbacks. The words in italics represent the flashback. Enjoy!

Dru

Chapter 3

Secret: Not expressed; inward

Mark knew it was stupid to try and go to sleep.

It must have been about 2:00 in the morning and the three of them were still in the living room with the baby boy. Roger hadn't put him down after he was through feeding him but instead had fallen asleep with him still in his arms at one end of the sofa. Mimi was asleep, curled up on the opposite end. Mark hadn't left his spot atop the coffee table. His heart was thumping painfully against his ribcage. Watching Roger sleep with Mimi near him again was almost painful to look at.

Because during the month that Mimi had been afraid to be with him again, Roger and Mark had a secret. A secret that he wasn't sure what he would do if got out. A secret that had become more to Mark then just a secret. Something that had taken him by surprise and scared him at first. But then began to mold into something he never could have imagined.

Roger was leaning up against the window sill, strumming sad little chords on his guitar and gazing longingly out the window, watching as raindrops traced their way down the clear pane.

"It's cold by the window Rog," Mark scolded gently, sitting in his usual place on the sofa, running a cloth tenderly over the lens of his camera. Roger didn't speak but stared mutely at Mark, pausing to set his guitar on the ground. Mark tilted his head a little to the side. "You just got over being sick. You better get away from the window."

"Oh yeah? And what are you going to do if I don't?" he spat, folding his arms across his chest, his forehead wrinkled in concentration. Ever since getting over being sick Roger had been very touchy. The slightest things Mark said seemed to aggravate the hell out of him.

"I'll come over there and pull you off." Roger chuckled.

"I'd like to see you try."

"Was that a threat?" Mark asked calmly, setting his camera down on the table. He was used to this by now. Roger would test the water all the time. See how far he could push Mark until he finally cracked.

"What if it was?" Roger snapped. Mark sighed and went over to the windowsill, stopping a few paces away from where Roger was sitting.

"You're so pathetic," Mark said under his breath as he took a hold of Roger's arm. Roger started to laugh, shaking Mark off.

"Let go of me Mark. You don't need to treat me like I'm five," he said sounding sarcastic and playful this time. He hopped off the windowsill and held his arms out in mock peace. "See?"

"Good," Mark sighed heavily before placing his hand on Roger's shoulder. "I'll get her up here soon."

"I know you will," he said softly, his shaggy bangs falling into his forest green eyes. Mark's heart gave a little jump and he felt a tiny flutter in his belly. It wasn't the first time he had stared at Roger and thought about pressing his lips up against his. He was right there. So real. So vulnerable. It would be so simple to do. But fear of what would follow is what kept Mark at bay. He knew the chances of Roger ever talking to him again would be slim to none. He was ripped from his thoughts as Roger's hand traveled to the back of his neck and gave it a few gentle squeezes, almost like a wannabe massage. Mark tensed and held his breath. What the hell was he doing?

"I'm going to go to bed," he said softly. His hand was gone. Left was an empty feeling in Mark's stomach.

"N-night," Mark stuttered as he watched Roger disappear from view. He stood in the middle of the loft for what felt like forever. Finally he allowed his feet to take a couple steps and sit on the couch. Soon after he fell asleep. And that had been that.

Sitting, watching. It seemed like he had been doing that his entire life. Night time seemed to go as fast as it had came, fading out and letting the morning shades of purple and light pink to take over. Mark was dosing, his chin propped up on his fist. All at once the three of them were jolted awake as the little boy started crying in Roger's arms.

"'S okay little one," he murmured groggily, struggling a bit to sit up. Mimi yawned and smiled at the little baby.

"Hey there sweetie." The baby stopped crying at the cooing tone of Mimi's voice and blinked up at her, eyes gentle and curious.

"We should feed him again before we take him down to the station," Roger said, setting the baby into Mark's arms before standing up to stretch his legs. Mark stared down at the baby who in turn stared right back up at him. Mark grinned.

"Baby boo," he cooed gently watching him react to his voice, fisting up a little of his shirt and giving him the biggest grin he had ever seen.

"He smiled!" Mimi squealed. "He smiled at you Mark!" Mark smiled widely.

"Did you see him Roger?" he was curious at this sudden turn of excitement in his chest. Roger chuckled and rested a hand on the baby's head.

"I did Mark."