NOTE: Thewhole "brother" problem is fixednow. That was just a stupid typo on my part. Thank you to all of you who caught it!
A/N: Another little oneshot. This one is a parody! Don't get me wrong, I love Sess/Kag pairing, and I'm a huge fan of of the whole "Sess find Kagome in a forest after she see's Inu and Kikyo together" plot, but it's so easy to mess with.
Dislcaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any characters therein. Nor do I own ThePrincess Bride, where the "five kisses" quote comes from.
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Kagome ran blindly through the dark, dense forest. She tripped six times, was scratched eight times, and ran into three trees. All she could think about was that horrible, cruel, selfish Inuyasha and has dead ex-girlfriend, Kikyo. She just happened to stumble across them during a make-out session. It didn't matter that they were in a secret, secluded, meadow hidden deep in the forest a hundred miles from camp; she still found them. Just her luck.
After an eternity of running, she stopped to catch her breath and collapsed into a sobbing, wretched mess on the forest floor.
Not long after, the glorious Sessomaru himself was striding gracefully through forest on his daily walk. His silver hair flowed behind him, flawless skin shone in the moonlight, claws glinting beautifully.
He'd only been walking a few minutes before a delicious sent tickled his nose. It was of cherry blossom, or perhaps the smell of dew early in the summer morning, or maybe it was the smell of a beautiful maiden who wanted nothing more than for a hansom, masculine, demon like himself to sweep her up into his arms and carry her off into the sunset.
He realized that the smell was so wondrous that he had no choice but to follow it. It lead him all through the forest, through meadows, around trees, through hollowed logs and across a lake, before it began backtracking itself and going in circles. Sessomaru was beginning to tire.
No. The beautiful, stoic, strong demon did not tire. He would continue.
It was not long before the stinging scent of tears reached him. It offset the usual scent of the girl and angered him. Who would anger such a sexy smelling girl?
When he found her, she was a sobbing mess of the forest floor. He strode confidently toward her and kneeled at her side (after laying down a small blanket to protect his white clothing). He laid a hand on her fragile shoulder. She jumped in surprise.
Kagome looked up and saw Sessomaru's golden-yellow eyes. In that moment, after seeing the poor girl's tear stained face, he knew that he could have other. Kagome would be his.
She saw concern and some other-unnamed-emotion fill his eyes and fizzle there, much like soda pop. She opened her mouth to speak, but before she could she found his against hers.
Since the invention of the kiss there have been five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. This one left them all behind.
Kagome broke it. "But you are your brother's nemesis! You have tried to kill us multiple times! This could never work!"
"So? And again, So? Of course this will work! We're in a fanfiction after all. And I am a Demon Lord! I can have whatever I want! And I want you."
He swept her up into his arms and carried her off into the sunset (even though it's the middle of the night). They lived happily ever after.
END
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A/n: so what do you think? I had a lot of fun writing this and I hope you like it!