A/N: Okay I can't stand it I must make it Harry POV! I just like it way to much to stop! Lol! I was wondering if you guys would like me to do Sirius' point of view.

Avoiding sleep seemed out of the question, I tried it but Sirius caught on real quick. He's all like "You have to recover, You won't Feel Good, You need sleep, Blah Blah BLAH!" really you would think I would drop dead if I didn't sleep. This idiotic bond is the worst thing ever to come to me, I can't even fake sleep. I want to learn occlumency fast, Even if it is with that Poor excuse for a human, Snape.

I know you must think that I don't like to face my problems, it's not that it's just I hate pity and I don't like when people try to pry stuff out of me. I'm not used to this Parental Control stuff. I love Sirius and all, but it's just weird, I find Remus easier to talk to though.

Well so avoiding and faking sleep didn't work. After Sirius threatened to shove sleeping draught down my throat I immediately tried to sleep. Really him and shoving potions down my throat! It's like he teamed up with Snape to make my life miserable.

I knew it was going to be a long night, very long. So I just prepared myself and closed my eyes.

: Dream:

It was morning, I woke up relieved that I didn't wake up through the night. I got up slowly feeling slightly awkward. My world was dizzy, I heard screaming, there was screaming everywhere. I closed my eyes for a few seconds before I stepped out of bed.

My foot was touching something, something Gooey and Cold, I felt myself shiver. I looked down and felt like throwing up, my mum and dad on the floor, Dead with blood running from there mouths, and chests. They were pale with their eyes open. I saw a knife in my dad's hand and fell to the ground. Tears came out of my eyes like rivers; I wanted them to be alive. I checked if they were breathing at all, but they were not.

I closed my mum and dad's eyes and grabbed the knife from my dad's hands. It was green and had a silver snake wrapped on the handle, it was bloody and I wondered who did this. At that moment Sirius came in, he looked around and his eyes were shocked and full of hurt and sorrow. He fell against the ground and crawled to my mum and dad and started crying. When his eyes rested on me they were livid, anger I had never seen. I tried to explain but he didn't listen to me. He came closer to me and grabbed me from the neck.

"After all I had done! You killed them! You're worst than the rat!" He spat out rat and threw me on the floor. He kicked me in the side, with disgust on his face. It reminded me of when the time I had accidentally tripped Dudley and my uncle was furious. I passed out after he was done with me. Sirius seemed angrier, and strangely stronger. I closed my eyes, his facial expression hurt worse than a bullet through my head.

"You don't deserve to live, you cause problems, Lily and James are gone because of you! Cedric was killed by you! I practically died because of you! You're nothing but a worthless freak!" His voice morphed in to my uncle's. My uncle suddenly walked out of Sirius. I felt fear, a fear I had not known for so long. I felt disgusted, that my uncle just morphed from my Godfather. They both looked at me with pure disgust and hatred, I screamed with pain, it felt like those looks were burning a hole in my heart. I felt a pain in my scar, it was burning.

"You know Potter, No matter what you do, you'll never get want you truly want, Because None cares, Potter, No one!" said a familiar voice "And if they does, I promise you; I will kill them, and it will be all your fault". I heard laughing in the Background, Cold high pitch laughter. And I woke.

: End Dream:

I woke up screaming, and I jumped out of bed into my bathroom and threw up. It was one of my worst dreams. My throat was dry from the screams and puking. I was very tired and weary. My world was spinning; I kept on hearing laughter and screaming. My eyes wouldn't let tears come, they were extremely unfocused. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up. It was Sirius he was clearly worried but I don't know what happened but, I saw anger. I scooted to the farthest wall. My mind was working slowly, I didn't know what was real from the dream, I didn't know why, and my scar ached, and burned like a knife was carving the lightening bolt over again. I couldn't see Sirius clearly, my mind was freaking out.

Sirius drew closer and my heartbeat quickened. Sweat came in by the tons. I backed fathers, even though I could go nowhere. I glanced anxiously at him wringing my hands, willing my brain to work correctly. It was still spinning.

"Harry? Harry, are you okay?" Sirius asked his voice seemed frightened; I closed my eyes tight waiting, just waiting. My head was still spinning. I heard someone running in the door.

"I heard someone screaming. Is everyone okay!" I hear Remus' voice. I opened my eyes and saw worry all over his face. Sirius looked helpless; he gave a pleading look to Remus.

Remus walked up to me, and crouched down, I relaxed slightly.

"Harry? Is everything fine?" He asked me. I slowly was coming back to my senses, and I nodded getting up slowly. I swayed a bit. I felt two pairs of hands lead me to bed and sit me down. I rubbed the bridge of my nose and looked around slowly. I saw Sirius and Remus, they were staring at me intently, and I could tell that Sirius was reading my emotions. Great, not only did I scream and throw up, I was hallucinating!

"Was it another dream Harry?" Questioned Sirius.

I nodded slowly looking away, I rubbed my scar and I felt blood. I knew they couldn't see it, because it was dark. I quickly wiped it away; I didn't want them to see it.

"Harry. Will you tell us about it, maybe we can help." Said Remus.

"No, um, I'll just go back to sleep." I said shakily, I was uneasy about "talking" things out; I'd rather sit through a million nightmares than express my feelings.

"Please Harry, you need to talk about these things, you don't get nightmares from no where." Pleaded Sirius, I looked at him, he looked so tired, I didn't want to wake him up anymore.

"I'll tell you if you guys give me dreamless sleep potion." I said tentatively, sure it wasn't what I wanted to do but it would help me somewhat. They both looked apprehensive but agreed.

"Fine Harry, But we cannot do this every time, why don't we turn on some lights in here, I can't see a thing." Said Remus, He lit a few candles, they illuminated the room immensely. They looked over to me; concern showed even more when they saw me. I can't say I looked all that great, I'm guessing. I'm pale and my eyes don't look so good.

"Well go on, faster this is done, the faster you can go to sleep." Said Sirius, I resisted the urge to roll my eyes; Sirius was never the one for waiting. I sighed, closed my eyes for a few seconds and took a deep breath.

I slowly recounted my dream, in a monotone voice, trying to keep all my emotions under control. I paused a few seconds in the hard parts, there were a lot of pauses, mind you.

I could tell Sirius was feeling my emotions, I felt guilty that he had to feel them. He was radiating comfort through the bond which helped me.

When I finished they had horror and troubled looks on their faces. I looked away and sighed, why me, why is it always freaking me!

"Harry is there any truth to any of this dream?" asked Remus cautiously. I really didn't have a clue what he was implying, well maybe I had a vague Idea but I didn't want to count that possibility.

"Err, what do you mean?" I asked, I silently held my breath.

"About your uncle did he ever, you know." Remus asked hesitantly.

"What are you saying Remus, that Harry was abu-, No, Oh God! Harry?" Sirius looked at me with eyes begging that it wasn't true. How much I wish I could say no, Sirius would find out. Dumb bond!

"Err, yes, but it's not a big deal. It was just a little bit." I said real quickly. Remus paled and put his head in his hands, Sirius on the other hand jumped up. I had half lied, hopefully that would cover it.

"I'm going to kill that overgrown pig! I'm going to kill him!" while Sirius was ranting, I just closed my eyes tight waiting for it all to go away. All the memories came back, I was reliving them, I shouldn't have said anything!

I began to feel my magic building up, I tried to desperately stop it, but I needed to let it out. I looked around, Sirius was still ranting and Remus was to busy trying to calm Sirius down. He didn't look to good himself. I decided to direct my aim at a wall.

I started to levitate myself into the air, and threw my magic to the wall causing a hole; I fell to my bed and looked at a frantic Sirius and a worried Remus. I smiled apologetically before promptly blacking out.

The next morning I woke up feeling slightly better, I could tell that I was recovering well even if I used a lot of magic last night. One good thing about blacking out, I had no dreams. I saw a disheveled Sirius right next to my bed and Remus wasn't here but I could smell food downstairs so I got up. I was a little sore but nothing new.

I stretched a bit before heading downstairs. When I got downstairs Remus seemed a bit surprised he pulled out a chair for me handing me food.

"Thanks." I mumbled.

Remus was setting the table, while staring at me intently trying to see if I was okay. He opened his mouth to speak, but I interrupted him.

"I'm fine, and I don't want to talk about it." I said while shoving eggs into my mouth, avoiding Remus' eyes. I heard a yelp downstairs a quick footsteps downstairs then a sigh of relief.

"Gods Harry, you should have waked me up." Said Sirius who sat down right next to me, I could feel him probing my emotions. I used my occlumency to no avail, instead sent irritated waves through the bond.

"I'm fine Sirius" I said in an annoyed manner. Sirius sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Well last night you didn't" he said roughly, I glared at him and started to pick at my food. 'I don't want to talk about it" I said, violently shoving my fork into a sausage.

"Well, either way you are going to have to start talking if you want to get rid of those nightmares, Harry. I mean for god sakes Harry you don't have to carry the world on your shoulders! You got to let us help you, we will always be here no matter what your dreams say." Said Sirius gravely.

I nodded and looked away, "Can we please change the subject?" I muttered irritably. Both Remus and Sirius sighed loudly.

"Well since you are feeling a bit better I could start training you in hand to hand combat." Said Remus. I smiled; this is what I want to talk about!

"Really!" I said, excitement pouring out of my voice.

"Yes really, we can start with the basics of martial arts. Before that we need to do some exercise to strengthen your muscles, you haven't done anything physically in quite a while.

I nodded quickly and ran up stairs to get cleaned up and ready. A half an hour latter I was wearing some sweats Sirius had got me and Remus was already ready. He led me outside to the massive backyard with a huge forest in the outskirts. I hadn't gone back here yet.

"Okay we will start with a few laps, see how much you can endure." He said while he brought out his stopwatch. "Okay 10 laps around this track," He said with a wave of his wand he made a Half-mile track. I inwardly groaned and he said go. I started to run, after the first three laps I gradually got slower until the tenth lap I was gasping for breath.

"One hour and 45 minutes for five miles, a little slow for you, we will have to work on that." He said before looking at me. "You should go inside and drink some water and rest. I think we are done for today." He said patting me on the back. I nodded giving him a grateful look. When I went inside Sirius was smiling.

"Looks like you had fun" he said, I glared at him before grabbing a cup and filling it with water.

The nights and mornings were running the same. Sirius and Remus would try to pry stuff from my past. I gave them a little bit of information. The information I was giving was a small amount, I did not at all want to relive the crap I went through. I seemed to be fueling Sirius to thinking up revenge. Remus helped me a bit, he is that type of person who can be very reassuring and calms me down. They gave me small doses of Dreamless potion every other day. Sirius slept as Padfoot next to me a few times, which I appreciated, but I didn't feel that comfortable. I was having fewer dreams, but my scar gave its regular dull ache.

The mornings were routine Remus mostly had me running laps, pull-ups, sit-ups and other stuff like that. I had a record of 200 sit-ups before tiring out and 50 pull-ups. Once I asked Remus to do something for once, thinking he was making me do all the work. He ran ten laps in 20 minutes, I didn't say anything afterwards, but I regretted that I had forgotten about his werewolf abilities. I shook my head. We had practiced some hand-to-hand combat, but only a little, I knew the basics of blocking, but I knew we were getting close to something substantial. Sirius was in better shape then me too. He did some of my laps with me just making sure I didn't over exert myself. My body was gradually toning out.

They said I would have dueling lessons soon; Sirius who was an ex-auror seemed perfect for the job. I was eager to learn from him to see how he taught. I spent a lot of my days reading. Ron was coming over in two days so I was excited, Sirius and Remus promised me a break on that day. I liked training, it got my mind off things, but it was tiring to get up at 5 am to an overly cheery werewolf and run laps.

That day, it was a week after I had started my training, I got my owls. I wasn't sure if I wanted to read them we were at the breakfast table, Remus reading the paper, Sirius trying to wake up. The owl came in giving me a letter with the Hogwarts crest on it.

I took at it and the owl flew away. I stared at it for a while before Sirius looked at me.

"What you got there? You're looking at it as if it was poison." He said trying to see what it was.

"What? Err. It's just my O.W.L.s" I said trying to sound impassive. Remus put down his paper quickly.

"You're O.W.L.s! Why didn't you say something? Come on open it!" He said smiling while Sirius nodded.

I looked at it hesitantly and opened. I read the letter.

Dear Mr. Harry James Potter,

In this letter are your O.W.L results. Depending on how well you did on your test will show on your results. You will receive an O.W.L. for each passing grade of an acceptable or above. A poor or lower will show you have not passed. Your results will determine the classes and career you take. Thank you for your time.

O.W.L. Results

Charms- Theory- Acceptable Practical- Exceeds Expectation

Transfiguration- theory-Exceeds Expectation, Practical- Exceeds Expectation

Herbology- Theory- Acceptable Practical- Outstanding

Defense- Theory- Outstanding Practical- Exceeds Outstanding

Potions- Theory- Acceptable Practical- Exceeds Expectations

Care if magical creatures- Theory- Outstanding Practical- Outstanding

Astronomy- Theory-Acceptable Practical- Acceptable

Divination- Theory- poor Practical- Dreadful

History of magic- Acceptable

You have scored eight owls, congratulations.

Yours truly,

Professor Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress

I looked at it once, and twice, and another time. I kept on staring at my potions grade and history of magic. How I even got a passing grade for those is beyond me. My potions surprised me above all. I stared for the longest time before I heard a cough.

I looked up to see an anxious Sirius and Remus. I smile sheepishly and handed them my paper. They looked it over and gave me big, goofy smiles.

"Wow, eight owls! You even passed History of magic!" said Sirius.

"Congratulations Harry, These are excellent!" said Remus. Sirius and Remus were grabbing me into hug. I was flushed with embarrassment.

"This calls for a celebration! Remus bake a cake!" said Sirius.

"You've been waiting for a time to tell me to bake a cake for a long time haven't you Sirius." Remus said getting up rolling his eyes.

"Well the house elves are that great on cakes." He said knowingly. I just smiled and helped Remus with the cake.

A/N: okay I thought I would end that happily. Sorry it took me so long it was drag on finding out how the O.W.L.s worked and even more frustrating when I had to rewrite the whole thing because my computer shut down before I got to save the story. Dumb computer. I'm a bit disappointed that it is shorter than it was meant to be I'm not going to focus on the abuse; it's just a mini-plot to add to the big plot. Like a big puzzle. I am a fan of abuse stories, all you have to do is glance at my favorites list and you'll find out. I'm thinking on putting this to teen, because the war is bound to be beyond the age of nine. Tell me what you think, any suggestions. I don't mind. Thanks for reading please review!

Thanks ickle princess for reading my story as if it were the Bible…lol thanks!

Thanks Luuvgurl for your interesting review, here's your update….