Me: Aww, why not post two chappies in one day? Goodness knows I have enough time. Some parts from Spaceballs are in this, and I don't own that either.
At the shooting range...
Nikki comes running outside panting and breathing heavily. She takes notice of the quizzical looks everyone was giving her.
"Geez, this place is so damn big, if I walked, the fanfic would be over by the time I got here." she puts on her goggles and ear protection and loads up her gun. Luna had 5 white T-shirts lined up, stiffened, and hanging on a line.
"This is what we're shooting at?" Battousai asks Nikki. He just stares at her, her head bobbing to some invisible beat. "Nikki, Nikki, NIKKI!" Nikki looks at him and pulls off her ear protection. Battousai sweatdrops when he hears Green Day music blasting from them.
"Did you say something?" Nikki asks him, looking at him with those innocent sapphire blue eyes. (Sano: INNOCENT! WHO THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE KIDDING WOMAN! Me: (grabs his ear) Sanouske, down boy! Sit!)
"I asked you if this was what we're shooting at."
"Oh. Well yes it is. And I'm glad. Glad I tell you! Glad, glad, glad, glad, glad!" she goes all huffy and puts the ear protection back on.
"I wonder if she's glad." Battousai asks himself.
AT ENISHI'S HEADQUARTERS...
"Have you found her yet?" Enishi asks some random dude that no one cares about.
"No sir, Nikki isn't at school, or at her apartment yet. (Me: T.T If Nikki can't be safe in her own home, where is she safe? Ariel: Oh! I know! Me: (slams Ariel down) Me too! In Kenshin's arms! LOL)"
"I know sir. Whoever you are, get me the fanfic Why Me?" Derek orders that random person that no one cares about.
"Yes sir."
"Derek, may I speak with you please?" Derek walks up beside Enishi.
"Yeah?" Enishi drops the whole bad guy voice and sounds like a normal human being.
"How can there be a completed fanfic of Why Me when we're still in the middle of making it?" Derek starts to laugh.
"That's true, but there's a breakthrough in computer technology: Instant Fanfiction. It's up on the website before the fanfic is done being made." Enishi furrows his brow.
"No way."
"I found it sir!" the random dude pulls it up on the computer monitor. He then flips it to Chapter 19 and they find themselves staring at the exact same part that you are reading now. Enishi waves his arm up and down. He then looks back and then Derek looks back and then Enishi looks back at us again. Enishi waves his arm up and down again.
"What the hell am I lookin at? When does this happen in the fanfic?" he asks, facing us.
"Now, everything that happens now, is happening now." Derek states.
"What happened to then?"
"We passed it."
"When?"
"Just now. We're at now, now."
"Go back to then."
"When?"
"Now."
"Now?"
"Now!"
"I can't?"
"Why?"
"We missed it?"
"When!"
"Just now."
"...When will then be now?"
"Soon."
"How soon?"
"Sir." Enishi and Derek look at that random dude that yet again, no one cares about, "We've found them."
"Where!" Enishi asks, pushing his too small glasses up his nose.
"It's at the Hirote family headquarters."
"Good," Derek says, "I'll head there right now."
"WHEN!" Enishi pushes his glasses up yet again.
"In a couple weeks from now, they will be dead."
"WHOOOOOOO!" Enishi's glasses fall off to finalize that statement.
Back at Mafia headquarters, after gun test...
"So what was all that for anyway?" Battousai asks, taking off his goggles.
"Just a test." Luna says, filling out some more paperwork.
"Child abuse test." Nikki says, taking off her ear protection. Luna slams her clipboard down and glares at Nikki, who just shrugs.
"How did you know?" she growls.
"You've had me do the same test before. I AM the child abuse psychologist ya know."
"YOU'RE A PSYCHOLOGIST!" Everyone asks/yells. Luna sighs and pulls up the instant fanfiction version of Why Me? On it was a list of Mafia job profiles. Names and positions were included.
Name: Lunesta Mayfield
Age: Unknown
Job: Doctor and field assassin
Weapon: Japanese Umbrella (not your normal umbrella, has a sword in the handle)
Logo: red rose and a needle and syringe(the entire needle tube thingie) forming an 'X' standing in some blood
Name: Nicola Elizabeth Juanita Isabella Maria Esparaza Hirote (hates her LONG name so call her Nikki) (Ariel: Someone's parents couldn't decide on a middle name. Me: Yeah, LOL)
Age: 18
Job: Child Abuse Therapist, undercover agent, sniper, and Mafia heiress
Weapon: Anything you put in her hands, but mostly kunai
Logo: Black rose with the stem sticking into the left eye and protruding through the right side of it's mouth
Name: Kaoru Kamiya
Age: 18
Job: Undercover agent and sniper-in-training
Weapon: Katana
Logo: Red rose with a whiplike stem wrapping all the way down a katana, standing in a pool of blood
"When the hell did I get this?" Kaoru asks.
"After your first mission with us. Mansion, remember? You should be getting your T-shirt soon." Nikki informs her, "ONWARD LUNA!"
"Last one I'm typing." she says.
Name: Spatial (Last name unknown)
Age: 18
Job: undercover agent, doctor-in-training, adult/teenage therapist, psychic
Weapon: dagger and bombs/ psychic abilities
Logo: Not yet completed...
Nikki yawns and stretches.
"So how's the kid anyway?" she asks.
"Wait, why are you guys involved with child abuse?" Kaoru joins them.
"Once in a while, one of our Mafia people get out of control, so they take it out on their children. It's our job to take the child away and take care of it and try to remove custody as well. I help the child recover mentally. I've just about seen it all."
"Oh yeah," Luna takes a couple of pictures that some kids drew off her clipboard and hands them to Nikki, "Here's the pics I had them draw like you said."
"Thanks." Spatial peers over Nikki's shoulder.
"I don't get it! It's a tree!" Nikki smiles.
"But it's how they draw the tree that makes the difference."
"Eh?" Nikki laughs and points to a black hole closer to the base of the tree.
"This represents molestation. The farther up the tree it is, the more recently it happened," tears started choking up her voice, "The bigger it is, the more invasive. This was drawn by a six year old." Nikki clears her throat and wipes a few tears from her eyes. "The things we do and see, any of us," she turns around and smiles at the gang, "no one should even dream about, but yet, we live it everyday. It's a wonder we don't go insane." Spatial hugs Nikki and Nikki begins sobbing in her shoulder.
"She'll be fine." Spatial whispers to everyone, "She'll be fine."
"God, I don't get it Luna?"
"What don't you get Kaoru?"
"How do you guys stay as sane as you do?" Luna smiles.
"We find an obsession. That's all. For me, it's wrestling, for her," Luna nods toward Nikki, "who knows. Anywho, that's the fifth time she's cracked in 8 years...not bad for the shit she goes through."
"Why's Sissy crying?" Luna lets out a squeak and drops her clipboard.
"Oh, Shannon! You scared me sweetie!"
"She got another child abuse case, didn't she? Is the child alright? Is it a boy or a girl? What happened?" Shannon begins sucking her thumb and twirling a piece of hair with her free hand.
"Shannon, sweetie, you know I can't tell you that."
"YES YOU CAN! You can at least tell me if the kid's alright! That's not illegal." Luna slaps her forehead. 'When did this kid get so smart?' she mentally asks. (Me: Uh, hello. She's been smart if she can hack into any computer IN THE FREAKING WORLD!)
"Alright, she's fine. And did you get those printoffs or not?"
"Of course I did, what do you take me for, a child?"
" -.- Shannon..."
"Shut up Luna. Here!" Shannon hands Luna a file folder with a whole bunch of e-mails in it. Luna looks at it and smirks. Shannon had just hacked into her brother's computer and scored her a bunch of e-mails between Derek and Enishi. Then of course, Luna realized that if Derek found out, he would seriously hurt, maybe even kill, Shannon.(Me: Yes, even his little sister)
'Shit, what have I got this child into?'
"Hey Shannon?"
"Yeah Luna?"
"How'd you like to stay with Nikki and Spatial for a while?"
"WHAT?" at this question, and yelling by Spatial, Nikki looks up and wipes a few remaining tears from her eyes.
"That is, if they don't mind."
"I don't mind. Do you Spatial?"
"No! Of course not! I was just shocked by the question, that's all."
"So how bout it Shannon!"
"OF COURSE!" Shannon runs up and hugs Nikki's leg, "Sissy?"
"Hm?"
"Can Kenny-san come too?"
"Who?"
"Kenshin!"
"Oh! Well now, Shannon...I-I-I"
"Aww, Nikki, you're blushing."
"SHUT UP KAORU! I AM NOT!" Nikki's face turns even more red.
"Awww, Kenshin love!" Nikki kicks Kaoru in the shin.
"I said shut up! Don't make me show everyone that one picture I took on my camera phone in Chapter 12!"
"You wouldn't." Nikki's voice changes to a low, deadly one.
"Try me." With that look, Kaoru didn't dare.
Me: Or did she?
Ariel: (bops me across the head) Oh shut up you.
Me: LOL! Please R and R...(I have to go to bed now. STUPID CURFEW!)