Chapter Forty-Three
Sadness Follows
Potpourri sat back as gingerly as she could, cradling her sorely scabbed hands like a child cares for a doll. It had been nearly three weeks since she'd arrived at Camp Green Lake and yet she still found it harder than ever to dig a five foot hole in the ground; the earth's surface just seemed to get drier with each passing day. But at least now Potpourri wasn't alone in the girl's D tent.
Vacancies at Camp Green Lake never lasted long, and soon all of D tent was filled up again—but it's occupants would never compare to D tent's veterans. Andrew, who'd recently been nicknamed Noid for his paranoia, was still too jumpy to really socially interact with D tent's new occupants, and he always kept to himself. Potpourri, on the other hand, had made friends quickly, and not only was she liked by those in D tent, but also by her friends in A tent. Beanie and the roguish, rough-and-tumble Blue had since left A tent, but the others were still there, their release dates drawing ever nearer.
The excitement about Chase and the others taking off in the middle of the night had since died down, and life was pretty much back to normal at Camp Green Lake. But every now and then someone would sit back and recall D tent's brave escape, making up all kinds of different situations just to make D tent seem braver or stupider or smarter.
"As they walked through the dessert the boy named Magnet fell into a hole of yellow spotted lizards and got eaten alive," a new boy in D tent would gladly tell all who'd listen. He'd heard the story from someone else and then had passed his own version on to everyone left, following the ways of oral tradition. "The girls all started screaming and crying and the guys laughed and pointed into the hole-or shall I say Magnet's grave!"
"That's not what happened!" a girl named Sticky cried once. "It was all really a HUGE romance tale!" she squealed with delight, retelling a different version of the story that the girls of Camp Green Lake preferred. "See, the girl named Chase was madly in love with the guy named-erm, what was his name? Oh yeah: Zigzag! Well anyway, they both loved each other with all their hearts but being at a camp where you have to dig holes all the time really constrained their love. So they devised this plan to escape Green Lake so they could continue with their love in peace!
"But Chase's best friend-uh, Rogue was it?-was really upset when she found out Chase had left camp, so she too ran away. And this started a big chain reaction until finally all the members of D tent had run off!"
Dice had stared at Sticky with mere boredom. "They ran off so they could continue with their love in peace?" he said in a drawl. "What kind of love are you talking about? Are you imposing that they had sex all the time?"
Sticky shot Dice a menacing glare in return. "Boys will never understand the true meaning of romance," she said more to herself than to Dice.
Dice had simply shrugged his shoulders as a response.
This was how the days seemed to pass by here at Camp Green Lake; everyone continuing with their daily routines and only stopping to think about where D tent might be now when there was nothing else to think about. Everyone was content and at ease—everyone but the Warden that is.
She'd nearly bitten her fingernails down to the bone worrying about D tent. She hadn't seen or heard from Friction and Mr. Pendanski in weeks, and the D tent parents were starting to take notice of the absence of their children—especially Twitch's mother. She had started calling more often, always wanting to say hello to her son and ask him how he was. But every time she called she would just receive a message from the Warden who was always giving excuses for Twitch's pardon from answering the phone.
"He's out on the lake right now," she'd say sometimes. Or, "Oh, I'm sorry, he just went on a long hike with one of our counselors."
"I see," Twitch's mother would always reply, her tone getting more suspicious with each call. "Well, tell him to ring me up as soon as he gets in, would you?"
"Yes of coarse," the Warden would lie.
"All right, good bye then."
The Warden never hesitated to slam the phone down on the receiver and then heave a huge sigh of relief. Sometimes she wondered if she would soon die of a heart attack just like the Warden of Camp Lakeway had all thanks to D-tent and their half-cocked scheme of a lifetime.
"I wonder if it's been my birthday yet?" Static said, bundling up in between the sheets and smiling at Zigzag as he lay beside her.
"When's your birthday?" Zigzag asked, lightly twisting one of Static's curls that had managed to escape her hair tie and now dangled at the side of her face.
"August nineteenth," Static replied. "Maybe I'm eighteen now. But I have no idea what the date is today—or how long we've been out here."
Zigzag shrugged. "We could ask that lady at the front desk, she'll know," he said.
Static smiled. "Oh yeah," she agreed. "I forgot about her."
Zigzag couldn't help smiling back at her before kissing her on the forehead. She was exceptionally beautiful today: maybe it was the way the light shinning through the hotel window danced around her face, making her violent blue eyes sparkle. Or maybe it was the fact that she'd finally had a descent sleep and taken a shower, and now was rested and clean.
The night before all the members of D tent had rejoiced at the privilege to take a shower—even Armpit had taken one! They had all split up into four groups of three; three people in each room. It had started out with Static, Lei, and Fidget in one room, Magnetic, Rogue, and Zippy in the next, Zigzag, X-ray, and Armpit in the third room, and finally Twitch, Zero, and Magnet in the last room. But as the night went on the neat order of the rooms was rearranged several times until it finally ended up in a chaotic mess.
Zigzag and Static had went to bed in one of the rooms shared by Rogue, who'd slept on the floor in a pile of blankets as she hadn't even wanted to be near the two. Armpit stayed in the room he'd started out in as he had fallen asleep almost immediately and no one was brave enough to try and wake him. He was accompanied by his room mates Lei (who gladly slept in a corner, far from anyone) and X-ray. Fidget, Twitch, Zero, and Zippy shared a room. They had pulled the two beds apart and had begun the evening with the girls in one bed and the boys in the other, but when they woke up in the morning it was Zippy and Zero in the 'girls bed' and Twitch and Fidget in the 'boys'. Of coarse nothing too extreme had happened in that room that night—at least nothing anyone would admit to. Magnetic was forced into the last room—along with Magnet, and in her opinion it was Hell. According to Magnetic, Magnet wouldn't stop trying to sleep with her—all night! And adding the fact that Magnet never seemed to run out of supposedly charming remarks, making his speech constant, Magnetic hadn't gotten the long amount of sleep she'd needed. But of coarse Magnet could argue all of this, and the next morning he gleefully boasted to the other D tent guys, telling them what a great time he and Magnetic had had that night.
So far all the members of D tent were at simple serenity and were completely relieved to be where they were now—well, most of them anyway.
Chase opened her eyes and stared at the pasty white ceiling above. After a moment or two, of just staring sleepily ahead she slightly turned to her left where she saw Squid lying beside her, deep in sleep. Chase looked back up at the ceiling in a dazed manner, and then back at Squid. She did this once more before her heart nearly stopped.
The realization of what she'd done last night had hit her. How could she have been so stupid? She hadn't used her head last night—let alone a condom—and now she had her near future to worry about.
What if she had a baby? The rate of Chase's heartbeat quickened when this thought came to mind, and she felt as if it might soon burst. Chase had always dreamt about having a baby at a young age; how terrible it would be, how wonderful, but her dreams were always like the movies, completely the opposite of reality. She always imagined herself as a young mother-to-be struggling with the decision of either getting rid of her baby by way of abortion, or keeping it and risking her child's safety and health—let alone her own sanity. But everything would always turn out okay in Chase's movie-like dreams; she'd always end up keeping the baby, learning how to support herself and her offspring, and finding a life of true-yet unsettled-happiness.
But now, as Chase lay there, the possibility of actually having a child at fifteen scared her, and she knew it would be a complete Hell.
More fear and anger began to boil up beneath her skin as Chase stared harder at the ceiling, ever pulling the sheets up tighter around her. What would her mom say? What would her friends back in Odessa think? Would Squid even stick around to be the child's father? Chase knew Squid's dad had run out on him at a young age, and she knew personality traits were almost always passed down from father to son.
"Good morning," Squid said between yawning. He smiled at Chase, he was completely happy and at ease, and only until he saw the sour expression spread across Chase's face did he find everything to be perfect.
"What's wrong?" he asked, looking worried.
"Nothing," Chase said turning away from him. But her voice was still tinged with anxiety.
"You sure?" Squid asked, a little unwillingly.
"'Coarse I'm sure!" Chase snapped. "Why wouldn't I be? I'm feeling just peachy Squid; don't worry about me! I'm not upset about anything! I'm not worried about having a freakin' baby! I'm not concerned about shit!"
"Oh, so that's what you're upset about," Squid said, rolling his eyes in a mocking way.
"What?" Chase cried.
"You're worried you're gonna have a baby," he replied. "Aren't you?"
"No!" Chase snapped. But after a moment she retired from her guard and nodded her head. "Yes," she said quietly.
"Don't worry," Squid said. "You worry too much already."
"But-but what if I do have a baby?" Chase asked, her voice relying on panic. "I-I mean, there is a huge possibility! And what happens when I do? My mom will be so mad! My dad will probably kill you, and I'll probably accidentally kill the baby 'cause I'm not fit to be a mom yet! And what will my friends back home say?"
Squid shrugged his shoulders. "They'll probably be jealous that you got to sleep with an eighteen-year-old guy," he said, trying to make a joke out of the whole situation. A second too late, however, he realized it hadn't been a good idea.
"What? You think this is funny?" Chase cried, sitting up and abandoning her hidden refuge beneath the bed sheets. "You think life is just one big joke?" she asked, shaking with anxiety and what was soon to become rage. How could Squid laugh about something this important to her? How could he just turn one of her greatest fears into a joke and throw it in her face? These were just some of the menacing thoughts that reared into Chase's mind as she sat there, staring at the nervous expression spread across Squid's face and hating every bit of it. "I'm really worried here and you're just laughing in my face! I CANNOT believe you Squid! You're such a—such a dumb ass! Such a bonehead! Do you even care if I have a baby? 'Cause if I do it's gonna be your child as well! I'm only fifteen—fifteen Squid! And you don't give a shit that I might become pregnant?" She paused for a moment, breathing hard and staring at Squid with something close to hatred. "You know what?" she said slowly, smiling to herself as she realized just how horrifying this situation was. "I bet you anything that if I did become pregnant, and if I did have a kid you would just run out on it. Just run away from the commitment and work just like your own freakin' dad ran out on you and your mom-"
Now Chase had struck a cord. Squid sat up so fast that Chase nearly fell off the bed in shock. "Don't you ever talk about my dad," he demanded, his voice no more then a threatening growl. "Don't you ever even think of talking about my dad, because I swear to God I will—I will-"
Chase was breathing as if she'd just run a marathon, sweat beading at her hairline despite the icy air conditioned room. She stared at Squid in horror: she'd never heard him speak so violently with any girl and she knew perfectly well that she'd do good not to press the matter, but her emotions were in such a flurry that she couldn't stop herself from speaking once more.
"You'll what?" she said meekly, barely understanding what madness within had brought her to speak. But now that she had started she couldn't stop. "You'll beat me?" she asked, steadily gaining confidence once more. "You'll kill me perhaps? What, are you going to strangle me? Or drown me in the bathtub maybe?"
"I WOULD NEVER DO THAT!" Squid yelled in disbelief. What was she talking about? She was completely insane and Squid wished more then anything that she would just shut up and leave him alone before he got really angry. No matter how much he loved her he couldn't ensure that he wouldn't do anything rash: he had, of coarse, been X-ray's right hand ever since he'd arrived at Camp Green Lake months before and he was accustomed to hitting people when his temper rose just enough.
"Oh sure Squid!" Chase snapped, now yelling herself. "How do you know you wouldn't do any of those things? I mean, how do you even know that you would never leave me if I did have a baby? What, have you experienced that before? Do you have lots of little children out there in the world? I don't know anything about you Squid! I don't even know your freaking last name for crying out loud or whether or not 'Alan' really is your first name! It could be some alias you made up because you're a mass murderer or rapist or something! For all I know you could be some forty year old man posing as an eighteen year old just so you can have sex with lots of teenage girls, make 'em pregnant, and leave them to suffer for the rest of their lives! I mean, it's not that far-fetched: I already know that you are a criminal!"
"So are you!" Squid snapped. "Don't forget you killed a little kid!"
Chase's jaw dropped, she could hardly believe what she was hearing let alone understand why she had ever trusted Squid with the secret of her crime. "What?" she whispered in shock. "What the fucking hell did you just say?" Tears began to flood her eyes without warning and her vision was soon completely obscured: all she could see was the watery outline of the bastard sitting before her and all she could feel was white hot rage as burning tears streamed down her face. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU!" she screamed shrilly without any previous forewarning to Squid. "I cannot believe you. My crime was an accident! I never ever, EVER meant to run over that little kid! NEVER! It was an accident! AN ACCIDENT! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME? IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!" Chase began to shake violently as the memory of the little boy just lying there passed before her blurred eyes. He'd looked so peaceful, almost as if he'd just fallen into a deep sleep. His figure was adorable, small and stout, all curled up on the asphalt road, thick, dark blood slowly beginning to seep through his little blue shirt and run down the roadside, taking it's time as it dripped towards Chase's knees.
Chase's hearing was now obscured as well, the sound of her thudding heart echoing about her head as she began to feel terribly sick. When Squid spoke again it was a miracle she even understood him.
"You never think Chase, never!" Squid yelled, the anger still building up inside of him. "After you do something stupid you always want people to feel sorry for you! You always break down and cry! Well I've got some news for you Chase, you're in the real world now and it's time to grow up. No one likes a dramatic bitch!"
Chase glared at him. "No one likes a fucking dumb ass either," she growled as she leaned forward on the bed, wiping tears from her face and clutching her queasy stomach. "So get out."
"Fine by me!" Squid said, jumping off the bed and pulling his shirt up over his head. He moved towards the door in such a fierce manner that he nearly knocked over one of the hotel's lamps. Before he left he turned and said just loudly enough so that Chase could hear him, "Fuck you Chase, fuck you."
"GET OUT!!!!!!!" Chase screamed, and Squid slammed the door behind him.
Despite the sick feeling that was rearing up inside her, Chase ran forth and slammed her fist against the door Squid had just walked through, leaving a dent she knew she'd have to pay for.
"Get out," she sobbed as she slid down to the floor. "Get out..."