"…Too much! We'll starve!" A distant voice echoed above her as she drifted throughout a place of nothingness, the slim world between awake and unconscious. Pain exploded in her belly, quick and merciless, clawing at her with every staggering breath that fought to pass her lips. Padme's eyes fluttered, not quite opening, but enough for a bright, bright pair of lights to blind what little vision she had.
Words. Someone was saying words. She tried to focus but she felt too weak to do much of anything. Another voice answered, one she recognised, male, but beyond that, her brain couldn't piece it together. "… Fix it! She must take her – she's dying!"
Another voice answered as the pull of sleep tugged at her once more, younger and feminine. "I told you the cost. That's the only way it's going to happen."
Was she still dying? Padme wondered as her eyes grew heavier again. It took a lot longer than she thought it would… Colours danced before her vision, great, swirling sparks that writhed to the rhythm to the agonising throbbing on her forehead. Despite being closed, her eyes were bleary. It was almost like being drunk, she thought, only in a terrible, terrible way.
"We barely have two weeks' worth of provisions for ourselves never mind giving them away!" The first voice cried, womanly and so familiar. Padme tried to pry her eyes open and saw a flash of white and orange before the pain grew too much to bear and closed them again. I should try to stay awake… I need to stay awake… "I want to help her but…" Her mind started to fade again, the darkness of before was too alluring to resist. "… To give that away for…"
The voices died into nothing.
Next time her eyes slipped into thin, open slits, she felt movement beneath her. Somehow, it worsened the pain in her stomach and she groaned out wordlessly to make it stop. It didn't. Dragging her exhausted eyes open just enough to see, she saw a window and the sky as she moved. The growl of an engine caught her weak mind's attention and she gathered the strength to turn her head just a little, barely holding onto her consciousness, to see hands on a steering wheel. The outline of a seat. A thick, fuzzy braid hanging over a slim shoulder.
It was all she saw before passing out again.
The third time Padme opened her eyes she felt… Different. Lighter. Consciousness came easier now, gently lulling her back into the world of wakefulness as everything shifted into focus. She sat up slowly, tired and dazed as the room around her became clear. Paper-thin sheets were wrapped around her body which fell low to her waist as she looked around, wherever she was, it wasn't The Coruscant anymore. The beige floor was cleaner than any she had seen in years and a gauzy, deep blue curtain concealed the room on her left. She turned her head slowly, frowning, as she saw a window looking out to a small, well-kept garden and wooden bench. Where the hell am I?
The bed shifted as she moved, creaking and almost… rolling? Padme winced as she leaned over the edge and something tugged at her belly. It had wheels! The bed had wheels… the only bed she'd ever seen with wheels were hospital beds –
She looked around and more and more began to make sense. A monitor rested in the corner beeping silently as a line crossed the screen peaking and falling in a jagged line. She was in a hospital! But how? Hospitals weren't real anymore – there were no doctors or nurses to take of people these days, survivors had to fend for themselves in every way possible.
Padme's mind was tired and slow as she looked around the room again, heart hammering into a panic inside her chest. This couldn't be real, it couldn't be real, this could no way be real! The alarm she felt morphed into a thick dread, a black hand wrapped around her throat and squeezing away the air as fear whispered panic into her scrambling thoughts. No, no! Just breathe, she thought to herself, just breathe and think!
What happened…? She rubbed a hand over her face and tried to focus… They were out looking for supplies… There had been beasts – way too many beasts – and things got bad… Suddenly, the sticky, wet, agony of a claw sunk into her belly jarred the young woman and the sounds of her friends' being nervous and afraid above her… Then nothing. Wherever this was, how the hell did she get here?
On the left, a scratching, scraping sound caught the Rebel's attention and she, on instinct, reached for guns that weren't strapped to her bare legs beneath the thin blanket. She jerked and gave a small cry of fear when the blue curtain was swept to the side to reveal a thick figure draped in ill-fitting grey sweatpants and a loose sweatshirt bearing a blue brand she didn't recognise.
Padme's breath tangled in her throat and tears welled in her eyes. Her head shook in disbelief… It couldn't be… It couldn't be possible! Still, her mouth parted though she didn't trust what would leave it as those tears painted her cheeks with grief all over again.
"Rex?" She gasped her friend's name, hardly daring to believe her eyes as he stood before her unchanged, save for a large scar cutting across his nose, as if nothing had ever happened, as if he hadn't died out there in the streets where no one ever found him. "Rex? Rex – how are you… Is this real?"
The New Zealander gave a small, almost shyly affectionate smile as he stood leaning on a pair of crutches. "It's real, lass. I was wondering when I'd get to see you again… Though I wish it wasn't like this."
"What…?" Padme's foggy mind scrambled for the right words to frame every single question she wanted to ask. How long had he been here? How did he get here? What the hell happened to him out there? "Rex, what happened?" She shook her head, "Everyone thinks you're dead!"
Especially Anakin. She remembered his heartbreak. The way he'd shattered in grief before her eyes at the loss of his best friend… And all this time Rex was alive and – and here?
"Well," the burly man sighed and came closer to her bed, "when we were out that day – "
The beginning of his story died between them as the door swung open and a redheaded man in bright blue scrubs strode into the room, reading something from a piece of paper in his hands. "Right… I'm doctor Bryan Parker! Good to see you're finally up!" He looked up from the paper and gave a bright smile. "How are we feeling, hmm?"
Padme blinked, bewildered, and looked between Rex and the man in astonishment. "Wait, wait, wait!" She shook her head, "where am I and who are you exactly?"
Rex and the doctor shared a quick laugh as he grabbed the small, white, plastic chair in the room and dragged it beside her bed. "I can see why this must be confusing from you. Rex told me you're a New York city survivor like him." He gave a small, compassionate smile, "It's bad in the city, real bad, I know – and things are no less dangerous out here but we're a little more…" He tipped his head from side to side as he pondered his words, "Well, there's a bit more structure here. Only a bit, though. You're in the hospital, Padme and you're very lucky that you are. I almost pronounced you DOA when you got here."
Her head spun. She'd watched enough medical shows before to know what that meant. She was all but dead when she got here… Dead. Her life over, just like that… Everything she'd been through, all it had taken to survive this long just – just gone. Tasting death like that, even without remembering it, shook the young woman to her core.
"Where…" Her voice cracked, "where are we, exactly? Who brought me here?" She knew nothing of a hospital – no one in New York did! Who knew this was an option?
On her other side, Rex cleared his throat quietly. "Ahsoka. I don't know the whole story but she got there not long after you got hurt. She took the payment and brought you here. We're in Southhampton hospital, lass."
"Payment?" Padme frowned, "Ahsoka charges people to bring them to a hospital?" That didn't sound like the girl at all, granted Padme didn't know her very well. "What kind of payment does she get?"
"No, no," the redheaded doctor spoke up with a small laugh, "Ahsoka just has a friend here and helps out. It's the hospital who takes payment for admission… It's a…" He winced, his pale, freckled cheeks lifting as he did so, "Well, it's a necessary thing these days. It's not so easy to get supplies now and taking patients on uses a lot of them fast. So…"
Padme frowned at him, "What did you charge my friends to take me in?"
"Same as everyone," he shrugged, "Two weeks supply rations."
Horror pooled in her belly as she thought of the depleting supplies in the city – everyone was struggling for every meal they had right now and Obi-wan and agreed to just give what little they had away for her? She ached to throw her arms around the Rebel leader suddenly... or maybe whack him for being so damn stupid. "But – but everybody's struggling… How can you charge to help people?"
"Before everything went the way it has, it cost money to come to the hospital. Now, doctors aren't paid to be here – we choose to be because we want to help people but we've got to get something out of it and what we get is what we need to keep going. Supplies. It's not ideal but…" doctor Bryan shrugged again, "what is these days? Now, Rex could you give Padme and I a minute? There are some things we need to talk about."
The New Zealander, patted her shoulder as he moved passed her bed. "We'll have a chat later, alright?"
"Alright," she nodded and watched her friend leave. As soon as the door closed behind him, doctor Bryan cleared his throat, drawing her focus back to him. "What did you need to tell me?"
"There's a lot of medical jargon that I could throw at you, Padme, but I'm just going to keep it simple, okay?" His eyes scanned the paper in his hands again, "You had several deep puncture wounds on your lower abdomen which caused serious internal bleeding and damages. Let me tell you, you're a fighter because most people would have bled out and died within an hour of receiving wounds like that but you held on. Well done." His smile was wide and genuine, "You're very strong." And then his smile faltered slightly, "now, there were decisions which had to be made to save your life, okay, Padme? They weren't easy but we did everything we could to keep you alive."
Something close to fear made her heartbeat speed up. What did they do to save me? She wondered with growing alarm. All her limbs were still attached but the longer she was awake, the more something on her belly felt… itchy and uncomfortable. The skin was taut and increasingly painful beneath the thin hospital gown covering her body. "What happened?" She asked quietly.
"When Ahsoka brought you in, she told us it was a beast's claws which caused the punctures. They went deep – too deep to not inflict lasting damage. Honestly, the decision had to be made within minutes after scanning the ultrasound. Now, I know it might be difficult to hear but the decision was made to perform a full hysterectomy upon seeing how deep your injuries ran. Your womb had been punctured which created deep internal bleeding. There was no recovering it, Padme. Now, we've kept you on high painkillers which knocked you out for a couple of days so you'd ride out the worst of it without even knowing – back in the old days, that wasn't allowed, but it was the best thing to do for you now. I know this is a lot to take in, but if you're ready, I can into some healing and aftercare information, okay?"
Padme nodded weakly, but whatever words left the doctor's mouth after that she didn't hear. A hysterectomy. She knew what that was, they'd cut out her womb to save her life. It was gone and she… Her stomach twisted and her heart sunk despite something in her mind feeling relieved. There was no risk of an accidental pregnancy putting her life in danger now, which was a good thing without a doubt. Pregnancy would be a death sentence these days.
But still… Her eyes burned and threatened to fill with tears so suddenly that Padme had to avoid the doctor's eye and hope he didn't see. Why was she so sad about it? Knowing that now, no matter what happened in the world, she would never, ever have children was… Honestly, she didn't know. She felt so, so, overwhelmed. Rex was alive, she almost died, there was a hospital the Hamptons… She would never have a baby.
Padme remembered when Sola gave birth to Ryoo and then Pooja, how her nieces had been such tiny, pink bundles of love and screeching. She remembered how happy her sister was, how she wept and cradled the girls after giving birth. How she and Darred used to watch their children playing and share proud, loving glances as they relished in the little family they started together. She had always wanted that for herself one day, desperately. It had been part of her life plan to finish college, graduate – preferably as valedictorian – start and establish a good career for herself, fall in love and have a family.
And then everything happened. And all this time, Padme knew, she knew, she would never have that family she always dreamed of and that was okay. It was a decision she made to keep herself safe. It was the right choice. But now that choice wasn't hers, she didn't have it any longer. If a miracle came down tomorrow and somehow cured the world of beasts and chaos… She would never have the life she'd wanted.
But that cure wasn't coming and she was in this world with danger and cruelty and her position really hadn't changed all that drastically if she thought about it logically… So why did she feel so heartbroken all of a sudden?
When doctor Bryan excused him, Padme curled up on her bed and let the tears flow freely.
She pieced the full story together slowly. Rex only knew so much of what happened, so understanding what happened was painstaking and confusing but thankfully, Ahsoka came to visit and happily filled in the blanks.
They were in the Hamptons, like Rex said, or at least, what was left of it. Things were still bad there seemed to be more civility to life than deep inside the city which was why a volunteer-run hospital was thriving without money and despite the creatures.
"I found him," the younger girl sighed sadly, fiddling with the bushy end of her braid, "Rex, I mean when I was on my way to visit Anakin and the other Imperials. He was in bad shape, covered in blood and barely conscious. Whatever beast attacked him really went for it. His arm was broken, his shoulder was clearly dislocated from being dragged around and his leg was twisted all the way around - I don't know how it didn't come off. I'd never seen someone so hurt before." Ahsoka said, her big, blue eyes filled with horror. "I didn't hesitate, I dragged him to my car which wasn't far away thankfully and drove him here. It's not been easy getting in and out of the city – especially these days – but I know a few shortcuts now."
"What do you mean, 'especially these days'?" Padme asked, frowning.
"Monsters are nesting at the edge of the city – so many of them. It's getting really hard to come and go safely, that's why I haven't been around as much. Coming here with Rex, I had one hand on the wheel and another out the window with my gun to try and clear a path. I was worried about crashing and getting us both caught."
"That must have been scary," she agreed, "but I'm glad you did it for him."
"The big lug is my friend," Ahsoka smiled, "I had to… And that's why I brought you here too... because Anakin and Obi-wan are my friends. You mean a lot to them, Padme and you seem kind. We need more of that around here."
"Thank you, Ahsoka," Padme smiled at the young girl, "I am so grateful that you took such a risk for me. I don't know how I'll ever repay you."
She smiled and held up her hands, shaking her head. "You don't have to. I mean it."
The two fell into something close to a comfortable silence as Padme glanced out the small window to the little garden and wooden bench. It looked nice out today, she closed her eyes and imagined the sun on her skin and sighed. She hadn't been outside this room other than to use the bathroom, which so far after her surgery hadn't been a fun experience.
Her healing was slow but with every passing day, she felt slightly better. After a week, she felt brave enough to peel back the bandages on her belly and see the long, thick, U-shaped scar across her flesh. It wasn't pretty but it was still raw and scars were an accessory everybody wore these days. She would get over it... she would.
It didn't help that she had to wear special underwear for the bleeding, which doctor Bryan said should begin to ease within the next week or two, thankfully. She had to stay in bed for just a few more days and then it would be gentle walking – nothing too strenuous while her stitches continued to heal. She was glad to be alive, desperately so, but she had to admit sitting around in bed all day was boring even with the old magazines and books Ahsoka brought.
The girl had also been gracious enough to find her clothes so she could get out of the thin hospital gowns. Now she and Rex wore matching outfits of sweatpants, sweatshirts and plain t-shirts. It was all very flattering...
As the days passed, something odd came over her. For the first time in a very long time… Padme didn't crave the thrill of the chase with beasts. She didn't miss hunting or killing or the ecstatic fear of danger around every corner. She didn't want that life anymore - how could she after it had almost killed her?
All this time, she'd wanted to live… but now she wanted to live peacefully.
However, that was possible.
"Ahsoka, can I ask you something?" She said, breaking the silence between them, to which the other girl nodded quietly. "All this time you knew about this place but you didn't tell anyone. Why? Don't you think Anakin and Obi-wan should have known this was an option?"
She'd seen poor Kit rushed off his feet in The Empire trying to help the wounded with his medical background, he'd looked after her when one of Anakin's beasts clawed at her back but his knowledge only went so far. There were only so many people he could help. The others could have come here – this place could have saved lives!
"It's not that…" Ahsoka sighed, her slim shoulders slumping defeatedly, "I wanted to, I did… It's just, I made a promise that I wouldn't tell anyone I didn't absolutely have to. These people want to help people but they can't do that if they're completely overrun by people with minor wounds or who want sanctuary or medications that just can't be sourced anymore. I'm sorry."
"I understand," Padme said quietly, "I don't like it… but I understand. Can I ask you one more question?"
"Sure, what is it?"
This one had been picking at her since she found out Rex was alive, after the heartbreak that followed her surgery and the intense relief that came with being around her friend again. Something which started as a quiet niggle in her mind and had turned into something closer to anger by now. "Why didn't you tell anyone that Rex is alive? I know it's hard to get in and out of the city now, I appreciate that but…" Her voice died as she remembered the grief that had come when everyone thought the sweet, New Zealander had died.
"I know," Ahsoka sighed heavily, "Anakin must have been out of his mind." Guilt shone clearly in the girl's eyes as they looked down shamefully at the floor. "I wanted to tell people – I even got that phone brought in," she threw her hand toward the old fashioned landline telephone in the corner of the room, "but the lines are dead more often than not. The day I brought you here, I was actually coming into the city to let Anakin know… but then I had to get you here right away."
Her answer quashed any lingering frustration Padme felt on the matter. The girl had risked her life by driving into the city just to tell Anakin about his friend – that was enough. It was more than most people would do.
"I've been trying to call but it never goes through," Rex said from the doorway and both Padme and Ahsoka's gazes snapped to the man where he stood leaning on his crutches. How long had be been listening? "I'm sure they're all surviving just fine without me, though."
Padme closed her eyes and shook her head, struggling to muster the right words. A horrible feeling of dread and guilt came over her as she remembered holding Anakin as he sobbed, mourning the loss of his best friend, one of the few people he truly let into his heart and cared about. Knowing all that was for nothing… It wasn't a good feeling.
"Rex," she shook her head yet again, "You have no idea what it was like after… After you went missing. Anakin was out of his mind worrying about you! He had people out all hours of the day until we found your jacket all covered in blood. We thought you'd been killed. He broke down! I've never seen him like that before."
The brawny New Zealander looked away shamefully, full of heavy remorse and she took a long look at him. His left arm was bound in a cast, his right foot was still bandaged up and the lumpy, pink scar across his nose still looked raw and painful even after all this time. It reminded her of the scar Anakin's beast gave Obi-wan.
He wore the same long-sleeved, grey sweatshirt as she did today, but she imagined there were more marks and wounds beneath his. Padme counted four on his neck alone, including a dotted line of teeth-marks that would never fade.
"I…" His voice cracked, "I'm sure you're exaggerating, besides, the boss is probably more worried about you than little ol' me."
Rex's words, despite meaning well and deflecting from himself, hit Padme hard. Her heart constricted beneath the cage of her ribs because it had been so easy to forget that Ahsoka and Rex didn't know. They didn't know that Anakin ended things between them and threw her out of The Empire or that he'd moved on with Aphra. They weren't there to see it happen. He looked up, catching the ghost of heartbreak on the young woman's face and shared a quiet frown with Ahsoka.
"What?" He said, "what's wrong?"
She hadn't seen Anakin in months, she'd made her peace with not being with him anymore, Padme had grieved and moved on with her life but reliving it all now hurt just as badly as it had when it happened. Who would have thought? "I… uh… Anakin ended things between us. He threw me out – I – I'm back with the Rebels now. He… He said terrible things… but he made his point clear. He doesn't want me anymore." The memory of the hateful words Anakin had hurled at her cut fresh wounds into her heart despite everything.
"Wait, wait, wait," Rex shook his head and came further into the room, "Are you sure he sent you away and not Aphra? It's the kind of trick she'd pull."
"Yes," Padme laughed bitterly, "it was his choice. I saw him a while afterwards… He was so cruel to me. He told me… He said he was bored with me. Rex, he looked at me like he hated me."
"And you believe that, lass?" He scoffed, "That he doesn't want you anymore, really?" Rex's eyes were incredulous as were Ahsoka's. She moved her gaze to the floor instead, feeling her throat swell. I thought I was over this! Why am I getting so upset?
"I do," she nodded, "Anakin made sure that I did. Besides, he's with Aphra now anyway."
"What?" Rex gave a hearty laugh, "that can't be right! Aphra's – " Whatever he wanted to say next died in his throat beneath the weight of Ahsoka's glare. "Doesn't matter. He loves you! He's absolutely mad about you! You have to know that, right?"
"Not anymore."
Both Ahsoka and Rex eyed Padme sadly for a long moment but the young woman's attention was drawn back to the window overlooking the hospital's garden. A light drizzle of rain had begun to fall from the skies and patter against the grass and bench. Just beyond she could spot the beginnings of lush trees and some flowers, healthy and leafy… It was odd. New York looked like a great bomb had gone off and killed or mutated everything that had lived there normally before and yet just up in the Hamptons things looked almost normal. Lived in.
At least from this one window.
Maybe fate decided to wreck New York specifically… Maybe it was destiny or just plain bad luck?
"We have to tell him," she turned back to Rex suddenly, "Anakin has to know you're alive."
"He has to know you're alive." He retorted.
Rex and Padme stared at each other, perhaps seeing what the other could not. That was what he wanted her to believe at least. When he was finally recovered enough to leave, if he returned to The Empire he would see the changes for himself. He would see Anakin and Aphra. That Padme wasn't welcome in Imperial territory anymore. Then he'd believe her.
Ahsoka didn't visit for two days after that. Whatever she was doing every day was none of Padme's business so she kept her questions to herself. If the girl wanted to share, she would. When the younger girl did return, it wasn't too difficult to convince her to pass over the phone number of The Coruscant. Ahsoka had grumbled about dead lines and it being a waste of time but relented anyway, scribbling the digits down onto a piece of paper.
It didn't matter if it was hard to do, Padme did nothing but sit around in bed all day, she could try and try and try until it worked. Because it would work. It had to. True to Ahsoka's word, the line was dead for days. For long, miserable hours, she called and called only to hear a long, beeping noise on the other end every time she redialled. Still, every time she typed the numbers into the phone, hope made her heart pound in her chest.
She rehearsed what she would say if – when – someone answered. What she would tell them about Rex and her, how far into the story she would go. After days of trying, Padme had a different script for every person she knew inside the hotel.
One full week of failed attempts later and resignation began to creep its way into her determination, dulling its intensity. The systems were obviously messy and impossible to get through… Maybe Ahsoka was right after all. Padme sighed as that infuriatingly familiar beep signalled another failure and made to hang the phone up for good. It was pointless continuing when it was clearly impossible.
But then, she thought of Anakin and Obi-wan and Bail. Of Dorme and Sabe, Mon and Kit – even Rush. She imagined all of them believing something terrible had happened to someone they cared about whether it was her or Rex. They deserved to know the truth. They had to know.
Her determination renewed itself and she called again. The connection failed but it didn't stop her redialling.
After a few more days, Padme finally met Ahsoka's connection to the hospital, a dark-haired, olive-skinned, freckly nurse named Barriss. The scars on her arms and shoulders screamed that she had survived horrors unknown. The girl was polite when they spoke but she looked at everyone like they might be her enemy.
Sometimes, in the afternoon, Padme caught Ahsoka and Barriss in the little garden downstairs. Though the doctor's had given her permission to leave her bed, walking more than to the end of the corridor was exhausting, so she looked out the window and saw the girls sitting together on the bench, talking and laughing like they knew peace. Their fingers always rested a mere whisper away from touching. They shared lingering stares. Barriss made a habit of shyly smiling whenever Ahsoka's gaze was elsewhere for a moment.
Love still existed in this world… Barriss and Ahsoka were a beautiful reminder of that. Good things still existed. If those two could find happiness in each other, maybe the world wasn't so dead after all?
Somehow, the thought made her miss Anakin like never before.
One day, on her twentieth attempt to call The Coruscant, someone picked up. It took Padme a few seconds to register this and to gasp out a few words as her heart thudded into a panic. All her practice vanished from her mind as if it had never been there.
"Hello?" A slightly distorted voice said on the other end.
The connection was terrible and the line screeched but Padme recognised the voice and felt her eyes burn instantly. "Bail!" She clasped the phone with both hands to keep it steady, praying the line would hold up and not drop before she passed on everything she had to. "It's me! It's Padme!"
"Padme?" He cried incredulously, "Padme! Oh my god, you're alive! I was beginning to give up hope! Are you okay?"
"I'm fine! I promise I'm alright – I'm here with Ahsoka actually."
"I know. You're both okay? Are you sure?"
Padme shut her eyes tight, caught somewhere between joy and anguish as she heard Bail's caring voice. She'd missed him so much – all her friends actually. Knowing how close she'd come to death, how she'd touched its darkness brought fresh tears to her eyes. She was alive. They were alive. They would find each other again.
"I'm sure," she managed to articulate, "but Bail, I need your help… I need you to do something for me, please."
"Anything!" He agreed at once, "Anything you need, Padme."
"I – I know it's not going to be easy, but I need you to get a message to Anakin for me."
Padme heard Bail's breath hitch and she could almost see the tension in his shoulders as he took in her words. She exhaled slowly, blood rushing through her veins as anticipation built up in the seconds of quiet. Please don't say no, Bail, please don't say no…
"Okay," Bail said at last, "What do you need me to tell him?"
The young woman let out an elated, relieved breath – if Bail were here, she would hug him so tight he wouldn't be able to breathe!
"Tell Anakin to call here," she said quickly, "I'll give you a number – he needs to find a way to call it. I have important things to tell him. Tell him I need to speak to him – tell him that I don't care about what happened with us but I need to talk to him."
She'd considered just passing along the news about Rex and letting whoever answered the call tell the Imperial leader but she was afraid Anakin wouldn't believe anybody else and would lash out in anger at the perceived lie. No, she had to talk to him herself. Padme could make him understand even after everything, she knew she could.
Bail breathed out shakily on the other end of the line. "Padme…" He said nervously, "God, I can't… I… You have no idea, do you?"
"No idea about what? Bail, what are you talking about?"
"Skywalker. He… He thought you were dead."
Padme felt the colour drain from her face. The world spun. Her stomach sank. Everything stilled around her to nothing but the screech of the phone line as it filled the silence that had fallen between them. Dead… Anakin thought she was dead. The man who fought to survive, who rejected the very thought of death, who promised that she would live… He thought she died out on the street beneath the claws and teeth of a beast…
"What?" She said weakly, voice cracking over the single syllable. "How – why didn't… How?"
"Someone must have told him about the attack. He went completely insane, Padme! He showed up here – he was raging like I've never seen before. He blamed Obi-wan for your death."
Padme held the phone so tightly her knuckles began to turn white. Her breathing morphed into shallow, panicked pants. "Is everyone okay?" She managed to ask, "What happened?"
"Yes, we're all fine. He and Obi-wan locked themselves away in the kitchen… but you should have heard them! They screamed at each other like nothing I've ever heard. Obi-wan eventually gave in and told him you're alive as far as he knew – but he refused to say where you were. He told him that he didn't deserve to know. Skywalker was livid, I thought he was going to kill Obi-wan."
Padme swallowed so hard that her throat ached slightly and closed her eyes so tightly that colours exploded in front of her eyelids. Her head spun so violently that she felt unsteady even sitting on her bed. Slowly, she forced a deep breath through her nose to try and calm down. Why was Anakin acting like this? He didn't want her anymore – he moved on with Aphra! Maybe he felt guilty…? He threw her out of the Empire. He forced her back with the Rebels and then she almost died. He thought she did die! Maybe remorse had blinded his senses and unleashed a fit of anger so uncontrollable, no one could have stopped him from threatening Obi-wan.
"Just tell him to call," she whispered, "please, Bail."
"I'll do what I can," he said with sincerity.
"And tell Obi-wan that I called. Tell him I'm okay."
"I will. Take care of yourself, Padme."
She quickly read Bail the phone number Ahsoka had written on the paper she left with Padme and then hung up. Something close to nausea settled over her for hours afterwards.
For days afterwards, Padme glanced at the phone constantly, just waiting for it to ring. If Rex noticed, he said nothing of it. His quiet presence was as comforting to Padme as it always was. They passed the time together, talking, laughing and even sharing bets on whether Ahsoka had mustered the courage to kiss Barriss or not yet.
The girl in question dropped by whenever she could but she seemed to be busy helping out around the hospital. And spending time with Barriss, of course. The pair were often found wandering the halls together with secrets hidden in their whispers. One afternoon, Padme wasn't long back from a long walk through the hospital, finally beginning to feel like herself again, when the girls burst into the room, pale and trembling.
"What's wrong?" She said as the two girls shared a furious look. Ahsoka threw herself onto Rex's bed with an enraged grunt while Barriss hovered near her crush uncomfortably.
"My mother is a Sargent Major in the army," Barriss explained, folding her arms over her chest. "Well, she used to be anyway but she's still got a few friends in high places. She told me something big is happening all over the world. She doesn't know what exactly but it can't be anything good."
"There have been planes," Ahsoka continued, "Planes sent over the world's largest cities. Paris, London, Moscow… New York. And others."
"Planes?" Padme repeated with a frown. She'd never seen a plane over the city before. "Since when?"
"I saw one," Rex commented from his seat in the room's singular chair, a twinge of curiosity underlining his words. "A few months before I came here, Anakin and I saw one. We wondered who the hell was flying the thing… Guess that answers that then."
"It's not just planes," Barriss said, digging her nails into her arms angrily, "It's planes full of chemicals being sprayed over everything they pass."
This confused Padme even further. She exchanged a glance with Ahsoka who looked back at her gravely. "Wait, chemicals? Is it to kill the beasts?" She hardly dared to believe that was possible. If the government hadn't vanished and left people to fend for themselves and had secretly been working to save them from this mess the whole time – it could mean the world going back to how it used to be! The end of this nightmare! But then, how could life ever be what it once was after all this?
"My mother heard they've been spreading the chemicals over the biggest cities in the world," Barriss said, "Several of them being in the USA."
"Why would they do that?" Rex asked.
"That's what we're trying to find out," Ahsoka answered, lifting her chin. "I don't know what they're doing but I want to because I don't think this can be any good."
"Why can't it be good?" Padme dared to ask, "What if the government is trying to poison the beasts before they can breed and spread any further? Maybe this is just the start of things going back to how they used to be?"
"I don't know, lass…" Rex shook his head, "I don't like it… I've got a bad feeling about this."
Padme said nothing more but her mind was ablaze. Mysterious planes flying over the world spraying chemicals for unknown purposes… It distracted her enough to forget about the phone for three whole days.
When the phone rang on the fourth day, the young woman almost jumped out of her skin.
Her hands trembled as she snatched up the phone, heart in her mouth, and heard the line connect with a click. A few seconds passed, an eternity, before a voice came through the line. "Padme? Is that you? Can you hear me?"
"Yes – yes, it's me! Anakin?"
Whatever he said next was lost beneath the screech of the weak phoneline and the loss of his words made her ache. She wanted to hear him, every intonation of his voice, to hear if he cared, if he'd somehow missed her – but she was a stupid fool like that, caring so much about the man who replaced her without a thought. The door swung open as Rex came back to the room and he froze in the doorway when he realised Padme was on the phone.
"Is that…?" He asked breathlessly, wide-eyed and startled and Padme could only nod, not quite trusting her voice.
"Where are you?" Anakin's voice came through clearly this time. "Tell me where you are, Padme."
"The Hamptons."
"What?"
"It's a hospital. Ahsoka brought me here to get better but listen, Anakin! That's not why I wanted you to call. I'm not alone here."
"Who's with you?" He growled, "Are you safe? Are you alright?"
There was an unmistakable protectiveness in his voice, something defensive and watchful. Padme forced a deep breath into her lungs, silently begging her heart not to leap at it and looked up to Rex. Her friend looked back at her still absolutely frozen in place.
"I'm fine… I'm fine… Anakin," her lips struggled to form the words. How did she shatter his grief and make him believe her? "I'm here with Rex. He's alright."
Suddenly, there was nothing on the other end of the phone. Complete, dead silence. She worried for a moment that the line had dropped until a deep, ragged breath echoed through. Padme imagined Anakin, holding the phone to his ear, his shoulders tensing up, his whole body hard as a rock. She could imagine his face slack with shock as he processed the news.
"What did you say?"
He sounded on edge, disbelieving and Padme finally embraced the joy her words should carry. "He's alive, Anakin! I promise! He's here with me – he's fine. He's been in this hospital the whole time – that's why nobody ever found a body! Ahsoka saved his life that day!"
"He's…" Anakin's voice faded away and she held her breath, terrified of the connection dying. He exhaled once, breath quivering as he tried to understand. "Where in the Hamptons are you?"
"Rex told me it's the Southhampton hospital. He's here, actually, do you want to talk to him?"
"No. no. Tell him – no. Tell him nothing, I'll be there as soon as I can find a car."
"Anakin, we're fine!" Padme insisted, her heart clenching excitedly and painfully at the thought of seeing him again. "Leaving the city is too dangerous! Don't risk it!"
"I don't care about the danger. I'm coming. I – I'll see you soon, Padme."
And just like that, he hung up.
Within the next week, her strength was back to what it had been before. Her injuries had mainly been on her stomach and though the medication sourced for her didn't cover all of the pain, she managed to get around again. Her scar was beginning to heal into a far smaller, pale white line that felt less tight and rigid with every passing day.
Her feelings on the procedure still brought on a confusing sense of relief and agony so Padme tried her hardest not to think about it very much. Life moved on and she was determined to move with it, even if it meant just pushing any such thoughts out of her mind completely.
The next morning, Barriss rushed into Padme and Rex's shared hospital room with Ahsoka trailing a few steps behind her. Both young women looked rattled – more so than last time. The moment the door shut behind them, Barriss cursed and kicked one of the monitors so hard that it toppled and crashed to the floor. At once, Ahsoka went to the girl and slung her arm around Barriss' shoulders, whispering words nobody else had a right to hear until the girl calmed.
Rage still burned bright in her blue eyes.
For a moment, she reminded Padme of Anakin.
"Barriss? What's wrong?" Rex frowned at the girl who shook her head silently, obviously trying to gather her words together giving without an enraged shout.
"My mother got more information from her source today about the planes!" She hissed in an angry gasp, "Those chemicals they've been spraying? They aren't to kill the beasts or to stop them from mating! They – they attract them!"
Padme's heart dropped in her chest. "What?" That couldn't be right – it just… It couldn't!
"The hell are you on about?" Rex asked, sounding more afraid than she'd ever heard him. "You're telling me those sprays lure the damn creatures into big cities?"
"That's what my mother said. Bastards. All of them are complete bastards! My mother's friend only told her as a warning to get as far away from the city as we can get." Barriss spat, even as Ahsoka rubbed at her arm soothingly.
"But why?" Padme's voice came out far louder than she intended, "Why would the government do something like this?"
"Not just our government – pretty much every government in the world." Ahsoka said sadly, "It's all been agreed on."
"Probably to clear them out from everywhere else," Rex answered, clenching his jaw, "They probably think they're doing the world some big favour."
"But there are still people living in the city!" Padme just couldn't comprehend it, "People are dying every day because there are more and more beasts and almost no food! How can they let this happen?"
At that, Barriss let out a roar of laughter – humourless and angry, "They don't care!" She yelled, her large blue eyes betraying the extent of her fury, "They don't care about anyone – it's some sort of government operation. Do you think they didn't know people are living there? Of course, they know, it just doesn't matter!"
"It explains why the beasts have been flocking to the city in such great numbers lately." Ahsoka nodded, letting out a frustrated sigh.
"That's monstrous!" Padme cried, fighting the idea with every fibre of her being. "They can't – they can't do that!"
"They are doing it!" Barriss snapped, "It's happening. Now we've just got to figure out what the hell we're going to do about it."
A/N: With this chapter, we're heading into the endgame and I'm so excited for it.