AN: Enjoy!
Soon, everyone gathered for the cutting of the cake, and shortly after that, the throwing of the bouquet. Wanda stood, kissing Vision's cheek.
"Are you okay with Tommy and Billy if I go follow this silly little tradition, Vizh?"
"Of course" Vision turned to smile at the twins. They had been behaving like angels, and were now both very pleased after each being allowed a teeny-tiny bite of cake. "We can take care of the table while Mama has a little bit of fun, can't we boys?"
"Ya!" Billy cooed, he and Tommy both giving their Mother their sweetest little smiles. Wanda's heart melted, and she kissed their little heads.
"You two be good for Daddy, okay? Mama will be back in just a minute.." She turned, seeing Natasha whispering conspiratorially with Carol and Hope, and frowned, raising an eyebrow at the three other women. "What are we talking about?"
"Nothing" Nat gave an attempt at an innocent smile that looked entirely out of place on her face. Innocence was never really something that could be associated with Natasha Romanoff. "Just.. bouquet strategies?"
"Like how to catch it?" Wanda was a little confused.
"More like.. how not to catch it" Carol cut in.
"We're really not that interested" Hope added. "I mean, I love Scott, but.. we're not ready to get married yet."
"You and Vision, though.." Nat continued, quite slyly, "You're committed, crazy in love, you've got the twins.."
"You three have put an insane amount of thought into this" Wanda chuckled, shaking her head. "Literal mente nebun. It's a bouquet. Just another Wedding tradition with an old wives' tale attached. Even if I catch this thing.. I don't really care whether I'm the next one married or not. It will happen when it happens, and I am completely okay with that. So.. no crazy stunts to make sure I catch it, alright?"
"If you say so" said Nat, with that scarily innocent smile still on her face.
Wanda rolled her eyes, and headed over to where Pepper was waiting.
On the way over, however, she was unfortunate enough to be intercepted by Christine Everheart, also heading over for the bouquet throwing. The blonde thrust out her hand.
"Hello, Miss Maximoff. I'm.."
"I know who you are" Wanda forced a smile, but didn't take the offered hand, and couldn't help notice the tip of the microphone not so stealthily hidden in the other woman's cleavage. She had known there would be reporters at the Wedding, and Tony had warned them about Everheart in particular, but had hoped to avoid them as much as possible.
"You know, it would be great to get an interview" Everheart continued, although her own smile was now equally forced following Wanda's refusal to shake her hand. "There's still a high public interest in everything that went on in Wakata.."
"Wakanda" Wanda corrected her. "And far as I am aware,nothing happened there that the public doesn't already know. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm just here Today to enjoy my friend's Wedding.."
"But Tony Stark hasn't always been your friend, has he? In fact, you've gone on record as.."
"That is a lie, Miss Everheart, because nothing I've said about Tony has ever been on the record. All I will say is that sometimes people make mistakes.. Now really, I.."
"But what about.."
"This conversation is terminat, Miss Everheart" Wanda cut her off. "That means done, in case it wasn't obvious. If you'll kindly let me go, I have a bouquet to try and catch."
"So do I.." the other woman frowned.
Hope, Natasha, and Carol all watched the exchange unfold.
"Who corners someone like that at a Wedding?" asked Hope in disbelief.
"A reporter" Nat frowned.
"Hmm.." a cheeky smile spread over Carol's face. "Hey Romanoff, I think I've got an idea.."
"What kind of idea?" asked Nat, raising an eyebrow.
"Well, Wanda only said she didn't want us to make sure she caught the bouquet.. She never said anything about making sure that bitch didn't."
Natasha flashed her a matching cheeky smile.
"Danvers, I like the way you think."
Before long, all the interested, unmarried female guests gathered around.
"Is everyone ready?" Pepper asked, followed by a cheer from the gathered women. "Okay then, here we go. 1..2..3!" Pepper tossed the bouquet over her shoulder.
As Christine Everheart reached for the flying bouquet, Natasha 'pretended' to slip, 'accidentally' sweeping a foot underneath the reporter and causing her to fall. At the same moment, Carol 'mistimed' her own supposed leap for the bouquet, landing on top of Everheart as she fell. In the end, the bouquet sailed over most of the group, and Wanda, standing near the back, caught it without much help at all.
"Get off me!" Everheart growled.
"Oh my God!" Carol feigned horror, as 'she struggled' to get up. "I'm so sorry, really, I'm not usually this clumsy.." With a tiny, well aimed energy bolt, Carol made sure to fry the reporter's microphone so she could not use anything that Wanda had said against her.
"What did you just do?!"
"Me? Nothing!" deciding the game had gone long enough, Carol took the hand that Nat offered to help her up. "Sorry again, silly, clumsy me.."
Christine Everheart got to her feet without any helping hand, grumbling to herself.. Then, a piece of Wedding cake landed on top of her head with a splat.
"Who did that?" she shrieked, before spinning around and pointing accusingly at Wanda. "You!"
"Me?" Wanda frowned.
"I know you can move things with your mind!"
"I can, but I need free hands" Wanda pointed out, holding up the bouquet. "Right now they are a little full."
"And I've been standing right here the whole time" added Hope. "Wanda didn't do anything."
"Nothing at all" Nat agreed, smirking.
"Of course you'd all back her up, you.. you.."
"Excuse me, Ms. Everheart" Tony interrupted, tapping her shoulder, "If you are going to be rude to my friends, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."
"What?!"
"I chose to invite them. My PR guy forced me to invite you. Now, will you leave quietly, or do I have to call security?" Tony grinned, enjoying this entirely too much.
"They would love a chance to take out some trash" Pepper smirked, linking arms with her new Husband.
Christine Everheart screamed in frustration, frosting spilling down her face, and stormed off.
"So" Carol asked a short while later, after they had all returned to the table, "Who did drop the cake on Everheart's head?"
Unnoticed by anyone else, Little Billy Maximoff giggled. Vision had just taken his brother to the bathroom to change him. Wanda knew she should be concerned by the implications of that giggle. But for now, she winked at her son, bringing a finger to her lips.
"Shhh."
Billy giggled again, mimicking his Mother.
"Shhh."
Translation:
Literal mente nebun: Literally insane