Ch. 19 – Daddy Issues 2x13
A/N: Ok, this is the darkest chapter to date. This is the episode where Caroline gets tortured, so that is going to get featured. Side note: this show is sincerely more messed up than I thought because this is another horrible thing that happens to Caroline that is passed on as if it is nothing. But I digress. There is also a scene that dives more into Emilia's backstory and we see some bad coping mechanisms that I have hinted at before and are potential triggers for people. Again, be safe. Before we go off canon scenes, I did note the trigger warnings. This chapter gets more explicit with them and I don't want to freak anyone out. I will also summarize the section next chapter for anyone who wants to avoid the trouble.
Disclaimer: I don't own the Vampire Diaries.
Edit: 1/16/2022
Eight am on a weekend seems way too early when you are standing on an empty bridge without a full cup of coffee and I drained mine 10 minutes ago. I am standing on the side, staring out into the water… I know my parents aren't down there anymore, but it feels like something is there… Some part of me.
Yikes, I am morbid in the morning.
Luckily, Elijah flashes to the end of the bridge and walks up to join me, breaking me out of my thoughts. Without words and continuing to look at the water, I pull out a folded sheet of paper and hand it to him.
I start explaining when he opens the paper, "My list of people under protection. Separated hierarchically by level of protection. Starting with the highest, being my friends and family who are flight risks due to their knowledge of the supernatural, the middle is close friends and Jenna who should be well protected but will hopefully be easier due to the fact they don't know about and don't engage in the supernatural, the last being acquaintances that I would like grant protection in order to minimize loss of life. And to the side, somehow off the hierarchy is Damon, because honestly, I don't know how to rank him. He should be protected, but at the same time, it's Damon, he's an ass."
"Yes, I've had the pleasure of his acquaintance," Elijah comments. I like the way he said pleasure- Not in a dirty way. He made it sound like it was anything but. Which is a fair point. I mean, like I said, it's Damon.
"Yeah, sorry about that. Again," I tell him. I sigh, "He's impulsive and the person most likely to piss off someone and get killed. So, he probably needs the most protection of anyone, but I don't particularly like him, so why bother."
Elijah hums. There's a moment of silence as he puts the list in his inner suit pocket. I run my fingers along the plaque on the railing of the bridge.
"So," I start again. "What's your plan for Klaus?"
"What are you offering me in return?"
"I thought I asked for this information in exchange for the deal?"
"You originally offered information and the moonstone." Seriously?
"You want to bring our original deal into this?" I ask. I narrow my eyes a bit, "We never actually stated official terms."
He turns to look at me, leaning against the railing, "Would you like to?"
I pause, contemplating him from the corner of my eye, "You want to make another deal?"
"I am a man of my word, as I stated last night. And as you stated you are in your note." Oh, wow. He is going to bring that up. He did read it. "I'm offering the chance for us to… collaborate."
"Collaborate? On your plan for Klaus?" I ask, stunned. He raises his eyebrows at me. Focus, Emilia. "Why me?"
He pauses again, looking me over intensely. New version of the same looks he has given me before. Oh, chills… from the cold morning. I need more coffee. He stares for another moment before he says, "You have information I need."
I really want to ask if that is all, but that's probably a bad choice. I take a deep breath and focusing back on the conversation and not figuring out what color his eyes are because they are so dark. Focusing. "What do you want to know?"
He smirks and pulls out a different sheet of paper from his other inner-suit pocket. He holds up the outer side, so the words face me. Oh. My words. I know that the Sun and Moon Curse isn't real. "I thought we could start with what you wrote on this sheet of paper." He flips the note over, so I see my message and he sees the secret. He lowers the paper and straightens up, focusing his intense stare back on me. "How did you know this?"
Oh, I was right. Damn… Ok, I can do this. "Would you believe a really good guess?" I ask, smirking. Fake it 'til you make it. That's a thing, right? Yeah, and that's what I'm doing now. What is with me?
"No," he smirks back.
"Well, it kind of was," I start hesitantly. He raises his eyebrows in surprise and confusion. And I am put a little bit on edge. Dangerous man. Still have to win more of his trust. I continue, "I was not 100% sure of the truth of the statement. You just now confirmed that I was right." Ok, deep breath and continue, "I needed something to convince you and this… was my best bet."
Elijah turns back to face the water, looking contemplative and almost mystified from what I can see. His face could be described as sculpted out of marble for a lot of reasons, but the main one right now is that he does not give much away. My estimations are only that, guesses. He conveys a lot in one look. And I've gotten quite a few different complicated looks. He murmurs, "A Thousand years and you figured it out as a guess."
"Well," I start, leaning on the railing next to him, both of us facing the water. "It was a very educated guess. And it was less than a thousand years." He turns his head to look to me. I sigh and murmur, "Tor al tzi Metzi, The Curse of the Sun and the Moon," before I take a deep breath and speak up and explain. "The story of the curse came into prevalence in the 1400s, the story of the Aztec shaman cursing both vampires and werewolves. It always seemed like such a good story, but something about it never made sense. With a little bit more research, it was obvious. Stories of werewolves and vampires had been prevalent for much longer than 600 years; all the stories featured shapeshifting men during the full moon and bloodsuckers hunting at night. How could this famous curse be the reason for that if it only came to be well after the creation of both species? So, I kept digging and I found similar stories, African pottery and Roman scrolls, something from all the continents and various cultures, all created around the same time with similar components. All the stories had the same things," I use my hands to count the ingredients, "moonstone, doppelganger, vampires vs werewolves." I lower my hands, "And the key part - the cherry on top, so to speak - I figured out when I held the moonstone. How could this tiny rock hold a curse over two species? Werewolves may have the small total population needed to be considered an endangered species, but vampires are everywhere. So, I looked into it a bit more. I asked some witches and I found that while moonstones are good for holding curses, something as big as the theoretical Curse of the Sun and Moon would need something much more than a single rock. So, the curse, as detailed, was fake. But the moonstone is real, and it is part of something, some other curse that Klaus is determined to break. And one that definitely requires both the stone and a Petrova doppelganger, so I hid the stone, and told you to try to get you to take me with or instead of my sister."
Elijah is silent for a while, staring at me. This time I start to fidget a bit under the stare. I spewed a lot of sensitive information in a few minutes, some of this is something he could kill me for. The feeling of him holding my neck against the wall when he first found out is prevalent on my mind. Especially in the intense silence. "Impressive," Elijah breathes out. Did he…? He said that? What?
I nod my head, a bit awkwardly and say, "Thanks." I turn back to facing the water. He does the same. We are both silent for a few minutes. My brain thinking of potential outcomes and questions. But the silence is surprisingly…comfortable.
Elijah breaks the silence by quietly explaining, "The curse is on Klaus. I plan to kill him after it's been broken by having a witch channel the power of a multitude of witches into him. This will kill him when he is most vulnerable."
Ok. I nod and run my fingers over the plaque a few times, still staring out into the water. I ask, matching his lowered volume, "What do you want from me?"
He turns his head to me and pauses. I turn my head to face him and he looks back to the water. "There is a location where 100 witches were burned at the stake. I need that location."
"Witches who were killed violently leave a mark of their power," I murmur, figuring out the plan.
"Yes," he says softly.
I take a deep breath and turn to face him. He is already looking at me. I could get used to a look like that… I need to stop my brain. "I can get it."
He nods and I return the favor with a smaller nod back. I check the time and I start to gather my stuff. I take one last look at Elijah, who is back to staring at the water, before I start walking to my car.
"Emilia," Elijah calls out. I turn back to him. He stands upright and looks like he is about to walk to me, when he just fixes his suit. He pauses and asks quietly, "Why did you choose this spot?"
Um, random question, but ok. I take a deep breath before answering. "I find it's best to talk about the people you care for in a spot where you lost someone. There's no better reminder for why I am still fighting."
He nods and steps back to the railing. I am about to nod again, when I realize how much we've done that, and I just turn back and make it to my car. After a quick debate, I drive off to the woods.
I need to think.
The end of the next week has us still reeling from the events of the weekend and the early weekdays. Tyler had his first werewolf turning. The same day, a mysterious friend of Mason's came, had Mason declared missing (I still can't believe that Damon didn't tell the Lockwood's he was dead), and then attacked the Boarding House and bit Rose. Rose slowly died from the bite, including going on a crazed rampage during the Booster Club Barbeque before being staked by Damon in a mercy killing. According to Elena, who witnessed it, it was another moment of real emotion from Damon. He had to kill her and then give her up to Sheriff Forbes. And while this was happening, Stefan went off on a solo search for Isobel, looking for another way to save Elena from Klaus, and brought home John. Caroline had some romantic drama between her, Tyler, and Matt. Also, Bonnie gave the moonstone to Luka, the new guy, expecting him to destroy it, but it turns out that Luka and his father are Elijah's witches. So, there is a lot to be worried about, and honestly, I think I somehow am choosing to worry about all of them.
The biggest one is John's reappearance, and I only say that because he is in our kitchen in the morning.
Elena and I walk into the kitchen to find him drinking coffee and watching the news with Carol Lockwood's announcement of a memorial service for the most recent killings including three at the Barbeque (Rose), some missing campers (werewolf girl) and someone just reported missing this morning (I'm guessing Damon, seeing as that's his usual way of dealing with emotions) and for 'All Those We Have Lost' in general. Yikes. But first things first, John. He turns off the TV and greets us with, "Morning."
I stand behind Elena as she asks, "What are you doing here?" Her tone is full of the annoyance we both feel at him being here.
"Coffee?" John offers.
"We're not doing that," Elena cuts him off. "We did that last night. No more avoiding. Why are you here?" She asks again, enunciating every word. Disdain is barely hidden in her tone and body language. Or is that just me?
"I'm here to protect you," he replies. Fucking fabulous. "That's all I can say for a moment." Double so. Stupid cagey asshole. Can't be actually helpful for once.
Can't remember he has two daughters.
I take a step back as Elena, even more riled up, asks, "What do you mean 'That's all you can say'?"
"I'll tell you when I'm more convinced I can trust you," John says calmly. I don't even think there are words to describe how much I hate him in this moment.
"What makes you possibly think that we are the untrustworthy people in this scenario?" I ask.
John is saved from answering when Jenna rushes downstairs and into the kitchen, "Oh God, I am so late." She throws her bag onto the island and starts looking for a quick breakfast and probably her keys. Elena and I are separated a bit by her rushing, with me by the doorway and Elena by John. Figures.
Alaric follows her, commenting, "That's what you get for hitting the snooze button three times."
Jenna finally looks up and sees John, cutting off Alaric with, "What the hell?" Yeah, that sums things up perfectly.
"Hey, good morning to you, Jenna," John greets her genially. The smarmy bastard. "Alaric."
"It's okay I'm confused, right?" Jenna says. "Because we were not expecting you, like, ever."
"Well, I got in late last night. Elena let me in," John says as he steps forward.
Alaric sighs and taps Jenna on the arm, lightly, "You know, I'm probably just gonna take off." Alaric looks to John who puffs up in some alpha male jackass way and then Alaric looks to Elena and then me, before he walks out.
Jenna turns back to John and comments, "I'm still confused."
"I decided to come back and stay for a while," John replies.
"Not here, you're not," Jenna responds. Go, Jenna.
"Actually, you can't stop me from living here," John says. If she can't, I will.
"Fucking try us," I mutter.
"Actually, I can. As legal guardian," Jenna grits out.
"Yeah, about that," John starts. Oh, he better not. He turns to my sister, "Elena, you want me to explain the situation, or would you like to do the honors?"
"Oh, hell no," I argue, walking up to him.
Jenna stops me, holding her arm up and keeping me from them. Most likely keeping me from punching John. I don't know, I don't have a plan. I just know he deserves a full ass-kicking. "Ok. What's going on?"
"I'm sorry, Jenna. I, we, should've told you earlier, but-" Elena starts.
John interrupts, "I'm the twins' biological father." I hate to use the term 'motherfucker' because it's too accurate right now, but motherfucker! "There. Now you know," he finishes and walks away.
Jenna and Elena just stand there stunned (Jenna) and guilty (Elena). I'm just pissed off. I could use a punching bag and Daddy Dearest just made himself my primary target.
I decide to go to my room and paint some feelings away. Eventually, I just grab my stuff and find a spot in the woods. I can't be in the same house as John for another moment without trying to remove his other fingers. So, I find a warm spot and paint out my feelings. There's a lot of hard brushes strokes and red. I rarely do abstract, because I'm more of an image-focused person rather than a feeling, but today calls for more of a mess while I try to calm down with something more artistic.
I stop when Elena texts me about following her and Damon to the Grille. I now have to help her stop Damon from killing John. Huh, might be difficult. Definitely wouldn't want to slack on my duties. I mean it would be such a shame if something were to happen to dear old biological father. Ok, that's enough of that level of passive-aggressive sarcasm. I pack up my stuff and drop it off at the house. And I make my way to the Grille.
I get out of my car just in time to see Caroline get shot in the head. "Caroline!" I scream, closing my door and running to her. I'm so shocked by the surprising sight that I get distracted and forget who shot her. And that costs me dearly, as he comes behind me and knocks me out.
Fuck.
I wake up to Caroline crawling over me.
I feel metal underneath me and based on Caroline's cramped position, I think we are in a cage.
What the fuck.
"I see you got the bullet out," a man says. Our kidnapper, I presume. "That was nasty." Caroline whimpers above me. She shifts so she's not on top of me. "I've got a lot of wooden bullets. Other toys." Caroline gasps out a small sob. He's going to torture her. Not on my watch. "It's going to be a long night, sweet pea." We'll see how long it is for you when I get out of here, asshole.
I peak my eyes open to see him raising his gun. I spring up to cover Caroline and I get shot in the back of my right shoulder. I gasp out in pain, but I grit my teeth and I don't scream. I'm not giving him what he wants. The bullet must go all the way through based on Caroline's scream. It also could be fright; I did spring myself on her. I rub my hands over her teary face. And I hug her tight, still trying to cover her as much as I can. It's hard when she is taller and leggier than me, but I try my best. Not well enough, because the guy shoots her in the leg. She screams and pulls her leg back.
I turn around fully to face him, pulling Caroline behind me as best I can, "You hurt her over my dead body."
The guy clad in a flannel and sitting outside the cage, which I see is in a trailer, smirks. He's a werewolf, I realize, as he lifts his gun, "That can be arranged." I move to avoid the shot, but I'm not fast enough, and he gets me in the right side. Fuck, wooden bullets hurt. Breath. Okay, it hurts, but I can still breathe, so my lung isn't punctured. I press my hand to the wound and try to stop the bleeding. Caroline is breathing hard behind me. Ok, I'm bleeding in front of a baby vampire.
I turn around again to face Caroline and whisper to her, "It's gonna be okay. We are going to be okay." I keep repeating that as she cries, and I try to stop my bleeding and breathe through the pain.
A few more shots going into various of Caroline's extremities that I can't hide. She is curled up on her knees in the back corner. And I am trying to cover as much of her as I can, but it's starting to get harder to focus. Most my chest is covering her back and my back blocking her lowered head. My legs are bent trying to make a shield with my right leg up and my left curled under it to block as much as I can. My right arm is pressed on my side wound, while my left tries to rub and cover Caroline's back.
A woman, one I think is Jules, the werewolf that Damon antagonized, walks in the trailer. She is holding her phone up as she says, "He needs proof." That's not enough information for me to figure out anything and just brings up more questions.
The guy raises his eyebrows and lowers them before sighing, shifting and lifting the gun to shoot at us. I curl up around Caroline more and I intercept the bullet. It goes in my right leg. I gasp as quietly as I can and breathe harder. I move my left arm to press the bullet wound. This one didn't go all the way through me, so I have to minimize chances for infections. The guy takes the opportunity when I move to shoot Caroline in the legs as well. She screams out.
Jules puts the phone back to her ear, "Just so you know Stefan, it's not just your little blonde friend here. I have a human with her. Huh, looks like she's bleeding pretty bad. How long do you think she'll last trapped with a baby vampire? Bring Tyler to me. Clearing by Wickery Falls. 20 minutes or they'll both be dead."
And she walks out.
Crap. Ok, I just need to last 20 minutes.
Omake: Stefan finds out that Emilia is with Caroline from Jules. He calls Elena and tells her that both of them have been kidnapped. Damon follows Elena into the bathroom at the Grille.
"Why am I just finding out about this now?" Damon asks about Tyler as Elena wipes her few escaped worried tears off her face at the sink.
"Stefan was worried about you-" Elena tries to explain.
Damon interrupts, "That I would what? That I would kill him." Elena nods. "Of course. That's what needs to happen."
"No, Damon, not Tyler," Elena says. "Do whatever you need to get," Elena chokes up a bit in worry, "to get Emilia and Caroline back." She takes a deep breath. "But leave Tyler out of it, ok?"
"Why? He's a werewolf. He needs to die. I'm willing to kill. It's a win-win," Damon says, ignoring Elena's tears to help her.
Elena grabs Damon arm, "Damon, please, ok? My sister is out there and too many people are dead."
"You need to stop doing that," Damon says angrily.
Elena removes her hand from his bicep, "Doing what?"
"Assuming that I'll play the good guy because it's you who is asking."
Elena huffs, "Be the better man, Damon."
Damon pauses and that's when John barges in. Damon turns asking, "Do you mind?"
"What's going on?" John asks.
Elena turns away and wipes the tears off her face and angrily replies, "Nothing."
"Doesn't look like nothing," John responds.
Damon turns back to Elena, "Well, guess what, John. Trust works both ways. Get out."
Elena interrupts, "Look, we don't have time for this. Emilia…" Her voice cracks. "Emilia is out there, and we need to get her and Caroline back."
"We don't need to do anything," Damon tells her. "I'll take care of it." He turns to John. "First Dad Duty – ground your daughter. Keep her here." And Damon leaves the women's restroom.
Elena moves to follow, "I'm coming with you."
"No, no, no, no," John says as he stops her with a hand. "I'm with Damon on this one." Elena moves to get past him, but John blocks her. "Stop, stop. You're not going anywhere. Now, just tell me what's going on."
We have changed our positions. Caroline is crying on the other side of the cage than we used to be. She's leaning on the bars while I am trying to protect her, but I'm leaning on her more than I used to be. Three gunshots are taking their toll. I'm just hoping to keep it from being three gunshots and a vampire bite. I would whisper encouragement, but every time I try to open my mouth, the guy lifts the gun and I close my mouth. I can't risk losing more blood.
The guy empties some of a water bottle into a small water gun. He puts the water bottle down and leans toward us, "So…how many vampires are there in this town, anyway?" Caroline stops crying at his question and he sprays her with the water gun. She cries out, burning. Oh, vervain is in the water pistol. Caroline moves around, squealing in pain. She accidentally pushes me away. I bump my shoulder wound as I fall and I gasp out. Ok, focus. The guy gets up and walks to his seat with a quiet and sarcastic, "No?"
Caroline screams and kicks the wall of the cage, "Why are you doing this to us?" She repeats the questions and starts to cry, "Why?"
The guys switches the water gun for something else and squats down in front of us again. He brightly replies, "You're a vampire." He puts a dart in a gun looking thing and lifts it up to his mouth. Oh, blow dart. I move up as he finishes with, "Why not?" before he blows the dart. I try to block it with my hand, but I'm getting slow, and the barb goes into Caroline's neck. God, my limbs are heavy. She screams as I try to help pull the barbs out. Caroline grunts/screams in pain and the guy asks her, "I'm sorry. What was that?"
Caroline kicks the cage right in front of him. She turns to the side and screams out the closed window, "Get us out!"
The guy antagonizes her again, "Excuse me? What was that?"
Caroline keeps kicking with her vampire strength and screams again, "Let us out!"
The guy gets up and laughs before he leaves. Caroline falls back to the side, crying. I try to drag myself back to her side, but I fall to the ground on my stomach instead. I feel really cold, which isn't good. I try to breathe and focus but I'm getting really dizzy and it's getting harder.
I can hear Caroline tap my injured arm and call my name before I black out.
Omake: Elena leaves the bathroom and John stops her.
"You're not leaving this restaurant," John says.
"You can't tell me what to do," Elena replies.
John crosses his arms, "Yes, I can. You want to know why? Because I'm here to make sure you stay safe."
"I've got that covered." Elena tries to move again but John blocks her.
"Are you talking about that deal that you made with Elijah?" Elena turns to him and sighs in anger. "You really think he's gonna keep his promise to you? Putting your faith in him was a dumb move."
"Are you saying that I should put my faith in you? After everything you did to Stefan and Damon? And when you are stopping me from saving my sister?"
"We've had our differences, and I've made mistakes, but you and I, we're family."
Elena gets closer to him and whispers angrily, "You don't get to use that word. That word is off limits to you."
"Fine, but it doesn't change the facts."
Elena nods slightly, "You're right. Facts are facts, so listen up. You may be my father, but I'll never be your daughter. You want to know why? Because you keep forgetting that you have two daughters and right now, one of them is being tortured while you attempt to keep me here and waste my time. So, you will never be anything other than my absent uncle, because I choose my twin sister every time. Got that?" And Elena finally pushes past him and walks away.
I wake up when I hear someone crash inside the camper. My vision is still blurry and I'm still too dizzy to sit up, but I can hear Caroline say, "Tyler!" Oh, Tyler's here. When did he get here? "Tyler! There's a latch. There's a latch on the door and I can't get to it." I can see him pause and turn his head back to the door. Caroline asks him, "Tyler?" He still pauses. No, we need help, Tyler. Caroline pleads with him, but he stays still. She desperately cries, "Tyler, she's dying. Emilia is bleeding out and we need to get her help."
I finally turn my head in time to see Tyler move.
He crouches, grabbing the lock and there's the sound of metal moving and breaking. Then he is back, and he is lifting the cage walls. He is struggling a lot, but my limbs are feeling really heavy. I can't- He and Caroline together finally lift the cage open and Caroline slides out. She holds the door, while Tyler grabs me. He pulls me out by my uninjured arm and slides his other hand to my side. His fingers accidentally presses against a wound and I gasp out in pain. Is it good that I can still feel that? He shifts his hand to a spot lower on my back and slides me out. I can feel the blood covering the whole floor of the cage helps me to slide a bit.
"Oh my god, that's so much blood," Tyler comments as he finally sees all the damage. He gets distracted and stops pulling me.
"We need to get her out of here," Caroline grits out. Tyler shakes his head and focuses on getting me moving and out of the cage.
He gets me out and goes to lift me, when I mumble out, "I can stand." I don't think they heard all of it, but they help me to standing. The world immediately falls out from under me and I crash into the wall. Tyler and Caroline grab me again, but I push her out, "Go. Help." Even I can't tell who the help is for.
Tyler helps me to stand on my own. Or really, on my own with help of the cabinets and whatever else is on this wall. I push him away when I get balanced enough. "Emilia, let me help," he says as he tries to grab me again.
I push him again with what I can, "You hesitated." I gasp out. It's getting hard to breathe.
"What? Emilia let me help."
"You didn't trust us and look what your friends did." Ok, I don't know if they are friends, but werewolves stick together. I mean my head is all fuzzy.
"You guys lied to me. They killed Mason."
Mason, Mason. I miss him. But this is his fault. He did this. "I told them to tell you. I couldn't stop them from killing Mason. I wanted them to not kill you." I gasp out again. Breathing is hard and thinking is getting harder, but I can do this. "But go help them if our lives are worth so little to you."
He tries to help me again, "Emilia."
I cry out and push him, "Go!"
He moves to the doorway and pauses just outside. I can see his back, but I can't see what keeps him in his spot. I try to breathe and walk my way to the door, when I hear screaming and magic. I gasp out more as I make it to the door. I'm leaving bloody handprints and splatters everywhere, but screw them, they can clean that up. I'm almost there when the screaming stops, and the magic peters out. I give one last push to the door and I see Tyler in the doorway, blocking my view of what's going on, but I can see some werewolf bodies on the ground.
"Elijah made a promise to Elena," a man says. Witch. Warlock. Help. "I'm here to see it's upheld. You need to go."
And with that my vision and balance craps out and I fall through the door. I think I fall a bit onto Tyler, but I am falling in and out of consciousness and I can feel that I'm sticking to the ground. I hear shouts of my name. I think Caroline grabs my arm. I can feel Stefan is about to touch me when he sees the blood and back off. Yeah, good idea. I don't need a Ripper. Losing my head would suck right now. There's some murmurs from Damon (Damon's not a doctor. He can't help me) before someone is trying to give me blood. I can't tell who. I am drifting off, but I am trying to hold on as long as I can. The last thing I hear is the warlock's voice saying, "I've got her. Go."
I pass out as I am lifted.
Omake: Caroline is back at her house, recovering from the attack.
As she peels another wood barb from her neck, Caroline hears a knock on her front door. She opens the door to find Tyler waiting on the other side.
"Are you okay?" he asks.
Caroline stares at him for a moment, before replying "I'm fine" in a dead voice.
"I had no idea they would come for you," Tyler explains emotionally.
"Do you know what they did to me?" Caroline asks, her voice breaking. Tears flood her eyes as she remembers all the pain.
"I'm sorry. But it's crazy right now," Tyler interrupts to defend himself. "Ok, I don't know who to trust. You lied to me!"
"I lied to protect my friends," Caroline announces. "I lied to protect you. Don't you get that?"
"Caroline-" Tyler tries.
"You just stood there! When they were going to kill us," she continues. "You just stood there! You didn't do anything!"
"I didn't know what to do!" Tyler exclaims.
"You help your friends!" Caroline yells at him. "That's what you do!"
"I'm sorry," Tyler blinks and shakes his head.
"No, it's too late!" Caroline cries. She takes a moment, trying to blink back the tears. She takes a deep breath before she looks Tyler dead in the eye. "Do you know what Emilia and I just went through?" Her voice cracks when she says her best friends name, but otherwise, she keeps her voice angry but steady. "Emilia got shot, multiple times, trying to protect me. Her blood was everywhere! It was on me!" She sobs, "I had to keep reminding myself that she was my best friend and she was dying to keep myself from EATING HER!" She wipes the tears that streamed down her face. "Emilia might die! We don't know where she is! We don't know how she's being treated! Or if we'll ever see her again! She might die! And you did nothing! She was the one who sent me to protect you when you first turned! She gave me the wolfsbane for you. She gave me ways to help keep you calm. She was the one who wanted to tell you about Mason's death, and everyone else stopped her. She did everything she could to help you, which you would get through me, but she was always there! And she might die! While you did nothing!"
"I…I…I didn't…I didn't know," Tyler stumbles.
"It's too late, Tyler," Caroline answers. "Because we aren't friends anymore. What happened tonight will never happen again. So you take that back to your little werewolf pack and you get the hell out of my house." She turns to walk away, when she flips back, "And stay the fuck away from Emilia. You don't deserve her." And she slams the door in his face.
Trigger warning after this second line: panic attack.
Trigger warning after line break with ellipses: PTSD, dissociative episode, self-harm
Trigger warning for Omake: mentions of previous suicide and PTSD
I wake up slowly, sore and with a bad taste in my mouth. Copper. It's Blood.
No.
No, I'm fine.
I leap up and look around to see that I am in an unfamiliar bed.
No.
I look down, hoping for one last salvation, but no. I'm not in my clothes. I'm in a man's.
No. No. NO!
Not again.
This was never supposed to happen again.
I got out.
I thought I got out.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Focus.
5 things I see. Lamp, window, bedside table, clinical wallpaper. Hotel rooms.
Flashes of previous unknown white bed sheets.
No. NO!
Focus!
4 things I feel. Sore. Lots of sore. I was hurt.
Pain. I still am hurt.
I'm squeezing my hands. My fingernails are embedded in my palms. Oh. Release. Relax.
Can't. Unsafe.
Fear.
The rush of painful panic running from my stomach into the rest of my body.
3 things I hear.
Blood rushing, heart pounding.
God, stop it. Snap out.
Can't. I'm swimming.
2 things I smell.
Blood.
1 thing I taste.
Vampire blood.
No. No.
5
No
4
Can't.
3
Focus.
2
Don't.
1
Please.
…
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
Up. Danger.
I need a weapon.
Curtain rod? Or Lamp?
Rod is heavy but long range. Lamp is glass. Multiple weapons.
Both.
Reach and unscrew curtain rod. Just use half. Grab lamp.
Wait.
Sounds. Words. Voices.
No, one voice. One-sided. Phone call.
Phone call ends.
Steps coming closer.
Prepare.
Leave lamp. Move by door.
Wait.
Door opens. 1, 2, 3. Smack.
Head shot. He's down.
No, he's not.
Swing again, shot blocked.
He did it from the ground without touching. Magic.
Witch. Need more weapons.
Run back.
Grab lamp. Toss. He catches it. He stops chanting in surprise. Good.
Swing.
Crash. Scream.
Swing again.
Head shot harder. He's down.
Silence.
Breathe. Regroup.
Weapons? Location?
Reassess location... Apartment.
Look around. 2-bedroom, 2-bath.
Check window. Don't recognize.
Regroup.
Kitchen. Knives. Weapons.
No holsters or straps on me.
Closet? Belt?
Phone call, no time.
I have to carry.
Grab three. Two steak: good for throwing and serrated. And butcher: large and good for stabbing.
Voices. I need to go.
One voice, phone call again.
He's behind the door.
Prepare.
Keys are jingling outside. Mechanism unlocks. Door swings.
Shh. 1, 2, 3
"Luka," he rushes past me. To boy.
Wait. He's too far. Stay behind door. Drop butcher quietly. Slowly. Stay unseen.
Can I escape? No, he's looking around.
He goes in the bedroom.
Threat?
He storms back. Yes threat.
He's looking around again. His back to me.
1,2,3
Throw. Hit on left scapula. He screams.
Run. Grab rod. Swing.
Blocked with Magic. Warlock.
I lose the rod.
He pushes with magic. Avoid.
Get behind. Pull knife.
He turns to me.
Slip behind and stab again. Retrieve knife. He chants, his wound closes.
"Emilia, stop!" He yells. "I don't want to hurt you."
Another magic push and a wind rope is tied around me. Stuck. I'm stuck.
Can't escape. Regroup. He spoke. Respond.
"Can't stop. Threat," I say.
He stops, "What?" he asks.
I strike. Two knives thrown.
A gasp. He drops to his knees. He chants and the knives are out and he's healing.
No time. Grab rod and swing. Hard.
He's out.
He's lying next to boy.
Regroup. Focus on escape.
Breathe. Feel funny.
He did a spell on me. What did he do?
Can't do this now. I need to escape. God, I'm feeling weird.
Focus. Run to door.
Pick up butcher.
Into hallway. Am I out of breath?
I don't have shoes on.
No. Focus. Need to escape. Everything else comes second.
Worry about being safe than worry about location.
A whoosh.
Someone flashed by me. Vampire.
Danger.
Back up. Behind. Exit. Stairs.
Run.
"Emilia!" a shout.
Keep running. I don't have stakes. Or vervain. Focus, no weapons. Don't engage.
A flash. He's in front of me.
Back up fast. Don't look at him. Just go.
"Emilia, stop," he is in front of me again.
I look. Elijah.
No, focus. Danger. Need to escape.
Vampire, so distraction: blood.
Knife to arm. Swipe. Bleeding.
He gasps. Good distraction. Stab him and run.
Wait. I'm healing. I shouldn't be.
Vampire blood is in my system. That's why I am healing. They dosed me with vampire blood.
It needs to come out. Get it out.
Swipe. Healing.
Swipe higher, still healing.
Swipe through left wrist. Good blood is rushing out faster. I have to get it out.
I have to get it out.
I need to switch.
I need it out faster.
A hand grabs my wrist before I can switch. It stops me.
No, I can't stop.
I can't. It needs to come out.
"Emilia, stop," he says.
I can't. It needs to come out.
I need it out.
It has to come out.
I need to get it out.
I need to cut it out.
I need to cut.
Can't stop.
Get it out.
Knife up and swipe.
I can't. He stops me.
He's saying something.
"Emilia. Emilia. Stop. Emilia, you need to stop. You have to focus. Focus on my voice."
"I can't," I say.
It needs to come out.
"I need it out."
He's taking the knife.
No!
I need it out!
I can't have it in me!
I need it out!
I can't stop yet!
I need it all gone! It's not gone yet!
I'm feeling dizzy.
Why am I feeling dizzy?
What's going on?
Eyes are going out of focus.
Is that Elijah?
"Elijah," I whisper.
I'm out.
Omake: Elijah deposits an unconscious Emilia onto his bed again and moves back to the living room, where Jonas is sitting with his son, both of them recovering.
"What happened here?" Elijah asks.
"I don't know, Elijah," Jonas responds. They turn to Luka.
"Luka, what did you see?" Elijah asks.
Luka sits up more in front of the "I don't know. I heard a noise coming from the bedroom and when I go to check it out, she hits me in the head. She was insane. She just kept hitting me. I tried to block her with magic, but then she throws a lamp and breaks it on me. And then she knocks me out."
The adult men turn to each other. Jonas rubs his back before he stands up and walks to the vampire, speaking softly. "It was the same with me. She waited and attacked. Used knives and knocked me out with the curtain rod."
"I have never seen her look like that. It looked like a possession spell."
"I checked her out for any foreign spells and magic. There was nothing."
"Then what was that?" the vampire asks, his tone short of the usual apathy.
Jonas pauses and glances at his son before turning back. He nods to the side, before checking on his son who waves him off as he heads to the bathroom. Jonas gets up and moves away from the bathroom doors and slightly closer to the open bedroom door. He speaks so quiet that only the vampire in front of him can hear, "I've only seen something like that once before." Elijah turns from checking on the unconscious girl to the warlock. "My brother was drafted in the Vietnam War. He came back, but he wasn't the same. He had nightmares and was jumpy all the time. Always prepared for an attack. He never settled down. It was like he came back, but he never actually left the war. We call it Post Traumatic Stress Disorder now. And he had it bad. One night, something happened, I don't know exactly what – I never had time to piece out what spooked him so bad." He takes a quick breath before he focuses on the man in front of him, "Anyways, he came in that night barking orders at me and at Luka. Calling us the names of some of his military buddies. We figured out later that he was in the middle of a flashback, a dissociative episode. He was back in the war and nothing we did could calm him down. I tried every spell at my disposal, and nothing worked." Jonas takes a deep breath. "I got him out of the room, away from Luka. I left him for a moment to look at one more book for something and in the meantime, he had found our father's gun-" Jonas takes a moment to blink away the tears before he continues- "he shot himself. He died." Jonas takes a few deep breaths and brings himself out of the memory and back on topic "The look in his eyes is something I will never forget... It was the same look in hers."
"She is a young woman. From a small town. She's never been in a war," Elijah questions.
"We all fight different battles, Elijah. Her war may not have been in some other country, but that doesn't mean she didn't fight. A lot of bad things happen to young women these days."
Elijah pauses. "She kept saying, 'I've got to get it out'. What might she have been talking about?"
"I am thinking something about the set-up she woke up in set her off. Based on what I saw of her behavior, she only started freaking out when she saw that she was healing. My guess is the vampire blood."
"Do you have something to heal her arms?" the vampire asks. "Something other than my blood?"
"It's not going to be as good, but yes," the warlock answers.
"Yes, well, do it." Jonas gives him a look and the Original straightens his suit cuffs. "We need her assistance for the plan for Klaus."
Jonas goes to grab the book and the ingredients he needs. But he stops for a moment, "Elijah, keep her calm. She may have volunteered for the sacrifice for a much more dangerous reason than we anticipated." He leaves the contemplative Original pondering the mysterious girl in his bedroom.
I wake up sore again. No, not again. I thought it was over. I look up. I don't know where I am. I need to leave. I move to get up and leave. Footsteps are coming to the door. And I run to grab a weapon, there's a lamp on one of the bedside tables, but not the other one. Weird. No, focus on getting a weapon. I pull it off the wall.
The door opens.
"Stay back!" I yell. A black man walks into the room and slowly lifts his hands up. "Stay back!" I yell again, lifting the lamp.
"Emilia," he starts as he tries to take a step forward.
"No! Stay back," I say. He stops and moves back to the doorway. "Now, where am I? What have you done to me?"
"All I've done is heal you."
"Liar," I say. I don't trust him, so I drop the lamp and pick up the glass shards. He reacts by coming forward. I immediately hold up the glass shards and point them at him. "Stay back. I've said it enough for you to understand. I don't want you near me."
"Ok, I will stay right here."
"Where am I?" I ask again.
"I… can't tell you that," he says.
I immediately hold one shard to my neck and the others to him. He's kidnapped me for something. I need answers before I can get out and he is blocking my exit. "Tell me why I'm here or you are going to have a dead girl on your hand before you can blink."
"Ok, I am going to lower my hands now."
"Tell me why I am here," I reiterate.
He takes a deep breath and starts murmuring under his breath. No, he's not murmuring, he's chanting under his breath. He's doing magic. I throw a shard of glass at him. My aim is off and it hits his lowered hand rather than his heart, but it hits him. I hold the shard back up to my neck and I start digging it in. "You make one more move, utter one more word of that spell and I move this shard and bleed out."
"Ok," he says slowly. "Neither of us are making any moves."
We stand there for a few moments until I start to get tired and drop my hand a bit. I finally lower my eyes and see the marks on my forearm. "Oh, god," I gasp out. I drops the shards and they shatter more, leaving tiny specks of glass on the ground. I keep staring at my arm at the marks. I thought I had this handled. I thought I was better. I was better. I haven't done it in so long. I back up against the wall and slide down in the corner. I was doing really good.
What happened?
I look around and realize.
I'm not in my clothes. I'm in an unknown male's clothes. In an unknown location, left alone. With vampire blood in my mouth.
Oh.
Oh no.
I need to get out.
I'm stuck.
I need to get out.
I thought I was out.
The man steps out and I immediately make my way up and out of the room, running across the broken glass. I can feel pieces in my feet, but I need to get out.
I make it to the door by the time the tears flood in my eyes.
I am running out the bedroom door as quick as I can when I run into something. I fall back and look up slightly. I see legs. I ran into someone. I immediately start half crab-crawling / half sliding back into a corner. I gasp in a panic.
I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here. I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here.
Someone leans down in front of me, but I can't make out any features. I think I'm crying too hard. I can't tell anymore.
I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here. I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here.
"Emilia," someone calls softly.
I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here. I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here.
The figure in front of me reaches out.
I flinch.
No, no, no.
I did it again. It's happening again.
They touch my arms and I flinch again. This time screaming a bit and backing up as far as I can into the walls.
No, no. Not there. They always grabbed me there.
It's happening again.
I thought I was out.
I'm back here.
They stand and there are some indiscernible murmurs. I think some chanting.
I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here. I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here.
Someone is crouched in front of me again. "Emilia," they call again. "Can you focus on me?"
I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here. I can't get out. I did it again. I'm back here.
The person in front of me turns with another murmur. There's some chanting and a slow wave of clarity rushes over me.
I can't get out. I did it again.
I'm back here.
I never left. I never got out. They're coming for me again.
…There's warmth on my face.
Why … is there warmth on my face?
What's happening?
I take a deep breath and analyze.
Warmth on my face.
Pain in my feet and hands. I think there's blood pooling in my hand. And down the sides of my crossed legs. I'm against a wall.
I'm a bit cold, actually.
What am I wearing?
These are not my clothes.
My breath becomes quicker again.
These aren't my clothes.
What happened to my clothes?
No, no, no.
It's happened again.
There's more warmth on my face.
Someone is saying my name.
Why?
I should look up.
I need to figure out what's going on?
I need answers.
I need…a lot of things. A jacket, tweezers, gauze. A whole lot of scar cream.
I can't believe I did it again.
But…why?
Why did I?
What's happening?
What happened? To me?
I need answers. And to do that I need to look up.
I don't want to.
There's a sweep of … something… across my face.
I look up in surprise.
I finally see who is front of me.
It's Elijah.
I don't want him to see me like this.
I take a few deep breaths and try to wipe my face. Anything to take a moment and preserve some dignity.
Try at least. My hands hit something on the way up.
I glance downwards.
Arms. Arms in a suit. Elijah's arms. I glance further down, making myself almost cross-eyed, to see that the warmth on my face - the feeling that had me so astounded – is Elijah's hands resting on the skin of my face.
Oh.
His hands are on my face.
That's why I can't rub the tears off my skin.
He already did it.
"Emilia," he calls again. My eyes flick to his.
"Elijah," I whisper in response. I need to ask something. Something that is not about the fact that he's touching me and somehow, it's comforting. Definitely not that. "What happened to me?" There, that's a good question.
"Jonas picked you up from a werewolf attack."
Flashes of memory come to mind. "I was shot. I was dying."
"Yes, you were. He delivered you here to help heal you."
The memories keep coming. I accidentally grab onto Elijah's arms at his wrists. "I was in a cage. They shot me while I was protecting Caroline."
"You were bleeding out too rapidly."
"I remember," I whisper, looking down.
"You had to be given vampire blood to heal."
I pause. I had vampire blood in my system. I look down at my forearms and whisper, "You gave me blood." I start to zone out again. My previous words repeating. It happened again.
Elijah grabs my chin with one hand and the back of my neck with the other to force me to look at him. I get another intense stare. Oh. This is familiar. Kind of. The look is different. "You are safe, Emilia. Your clothes were destroyed from all the blood. We had to cut them off to make sure you were healing. Nothing happened. You are safe here, Emilia. You are safe."
"I'm safe," I whisper back, lost in his eyes. I blink and I am back in my head again. Only this time, I realize what happened.
I just had an episode in front of an Original vampire.
I have to get out of here. Now.
"I need to go home," I say. Elijah's hands drop and he sits back. "I need to check on Caroline and on my sister." I stand up and make my way to the door. I turn back when I am at the door. "Thank you…for…well, all of this." I shift past my awkwardness and focus on getting back to our working relationship, "For upholding your end of the deal. I will be sure to work on finding the location of the witches. I've got a few contacts that I will contact- get in touch with as soon as I get home and I will get back to you when I can." I open the door and stop in the doorway, looking away, "I am so sorry. But, goodbye." And I start running down the hallway.
I can't be here.
The man, Jonas, catches up to me and hands me the remnants of my stuff. "I'll give you a ride home."
I look at him, but avoid his face and eye contact, "I'm sorry but I can't."
He backs off a bit and a take a relieved breath. "I will drive you to your car then. Where is it?"
I grab my things from him and mutter, "The Grille." His insistence and my lack of knowledge of where I am leads me to acquiesce.
He nods and leads me silently to his car. The rather short ride to the Grille is silent as well. I can't focus on where we were or the directions we are taking to get to the Grille. All I can do is focus on breathing.
In 1, 2, 3, 4
Hold 1, 2, 3, 4
Out 1, 2, 3, 4,
In 1, 2, 3, 4
Hold, 2, 3, 4
Out 2, 3, 4
The only time the silence is broken is when I leave the car, when I mumble out a quick "Thank you and I'm sorry" before I rush to my car and lock it around me.
I don't move until he drives away. And all I do is open my phone to a text from Stefan.
Elena and Bonnie are at Caroline's for a slumber party.
Elena has stuff for you.
Thank god for my sister is all I can think as I drive.
I park and stop long enough to remove the glass pieces in my feet. Then, I wrap my feet in some extra shows and make it to the doorway and knock on the door just fine.
When I see my sister and Caroline, I finally break down crying.
A/N: Oof. Ok, that was a lot. I really hope this went as well as I hope it did. This is another chapter that I have been thinking about for a while and one that inspired me to write this story.
I originally wanted a tending-to-my-wounds scene, but I was like, you know what's fun? Intense angst and trauma. So, here we are! (This is not to make light of trauma, especially self-harm, PTSD, and suicide. I put those warnings for a reason. Please stay safe.