An Affair To Remember: Let me help you

by tarskeewee08

Turning over in bed John kicked at his sheets. He felt a wave of stifling claustrophobia and opened his eyes. The room was dark except the glow of the melting candle to his left, and he's sweating from the spring time heat that circulates. Sitting up on his elbow he could still taste the beer on his tongue. It must be 3 in the morning and his insomnia made his mind wonder to his princess. Looking at the door he wonders how she's sleeping.

Tonight started out awkward but he knew she was softening toward him. Thinking about what she said in regards to trust he sighed. She was right his intentions weren't altogether honorable. Hell they were extremely selfish. But what she didn't understand is that this was the first time he was actually being selfish. He let her go for her own good and he stayed away because he thought she had found the happiness she deserved. Now he truly believed that this was their destiny.

Rising he threw his legs over the bed and rose. Stretching in the darkness he arched his back and tried to work the soreness from it. It felt like a sauna in his room. Wearing nothing but his gray pajama pants he went to the drapes and pulled them back. Opening the French doors he walked out into the balcony welcoming the cool breeze blowing his hair from his face. Looking up at the sky he saw it was full moon and took that as a good sign. Before turning to go back to his room he looked to the left and saw her.

She stood on the balcony with her head facing the sky and eyes closed. The wind was blowing at her hair lightly. The moonlight made her skin glow a soft bluish color. He looked at her in her thin white nightgown that clung to her body blowing backward. From his vantage point he could see the point of her nipples and the swell of her breast stretching through her gown. She held onto the stone ledge of the balcony and he saw the content smile on her face. She looked at peace. He wanted her so much in this moment that he remained frozen to the spot. It seemed like an eternity since he touched her body and she responded in love not pain.

He'd failed her terribly and may loose her in the end, but the fact remained he loved her more and more with each breath he took. She lowered her head and opened her eyes. He watched as she looked out into the land and her hair continued to blow around her head. Turning she left the balcony going back inside never noticing him watching her silently. Her disappearing from view forced him to snap out of it.

Rubbing his jaw as the wind whipped his hair he contemplated going to her. If he did he would break their agreement and he didn't want to do that. Shaking his head sadly he turned and walked into his room leaving the door open so the wind could cool off his room. Lifting his head he saw her standing in the dark watching him silently near his bed.

He blinked several times thinking his eyes were playing a joke on him and when they focused in the moonlit room he saw it was indeed her and she was smiling sly at him.

"Evangeline?" he said softly.
She walked to him and he saw her body and curves through the thin nightgown. Her hair swaying lightly she looked like an Angel. Stopping in front of him she put her soft hand onto his bare chest. He looked down at her hand then into her face. He couldn't believe she came to him.

"I love you John and I don't care what has kept us apart all these years I wanted the life we were supposed to have" Sliding her hand up his chest to his neck she slipped it around and pulled his face to hers.

John's lips parted eagerly before even reaching hers and his eyes lowered as her tongue slid inside. She kissed him in such a deep hungrily way that he struggled for the memory of how to breathe when kissing the woman of his desires.

Taking his hands he pulled her closely to him. Running his hands over her body she felt as he remembered and he desperately wanted her out of the nightgown. Kissing her harder he pulled at the gown ripping some of the delicate fabric parts and yanking it from her. His need for her so intense he wasn't aware of the force he was using. Picking her up now naked in front of him he carried her to the bed and climbed onto her. Kissing her face and neck he didn't realize he was crying, but he was. He couldn't believe she came to him. He couldn't believe she was finally his.

She pushed him over and in a seductive move and glided on top of him kissing his face and neck he felt the need to have her now intensify as she pulled up and the wind from the open window blew at his hair. Smiling he opened his eyes to darkness.

Focusing he shook his head and looked around. He was alone. Rising on his elbows he looked over to the right and saw the French door open blowing in the night air. It was all a dream. The disappointment punched him in the chest and he moaned at the lost of her. Falling back on the pillow he hit the side of the bed with his fist. This was killing him.

The Next Morning

Evangeline woke up to light knocking on the door. Opening her eyes she sat up groggily trying to shake off the deep slumber that held her still "Come in" she said softly

The door opened and Ming peeked inside. "Morning sleeping beauty"
"Morning….what time is it?"
Ming smiled stepping inside already dressed "Its 6 am and I was thinking we could make breakfast."

Evangeline frowned. She hadn't cooked breakfast in over 5 years. Looking at Ming she shook her head no and fell back on the pillow "I don't want too….I want to sleep"
Ming laughed "Girl, come on…I want to make breakfast and catch up with you."

Evangeline rolled over in the bed ignoring her pulling the blanket over her head. Ming raced over and jumped on top landing on her legs. She hollered and Ming grinned pinning her down. "If you don't get up and make breakfast with me I will tell John that you used to practice how you looked kissing in the mirror every night before he picked you up."

"What! You wouldn't dare!"
"Wouldn't I!" Ming said rolling her neck.

Evangeline pushed her and she went flying to the other end of the bed. She jumped up afraid she shoved her to hard sending her off the bed but Ming caught herself before she went over. They both burst into laughter and Evangeline pulled the covers over head trying to escape. Ming got up and pulled the entire blanket off her onto the floor. Evangeline frowned at her and Ming put her hands on her hips challengingly "Get up and bring your narrow tail downstairs in the next 30 minutes!" she said and breezed out.

Later dressed and wandering down the halls of the Castle Evangeline got a sense of panic at the long hallways that led nowhere. She thought the kitchen was on the west wing but the further she wandered the more confused she became. Hearing Ming drop a pot and scream out a curse word in her native tongue, Evangeline smiled and made the next left.

Walking into the large cooking area she smiled at several posts already billowing smoke. She had no idea what her friend was cooking but she looked to be enjoying it. Looking around the kitchen she marveled on the extravagance for such an old dreary place. The kitchen was modernized and Evangeline wondered if John brought Caitlyn here while they were married.

She and Ming cooked breakfast and even made homemade biscuits. When the guys came down they were pleasantly surprised at the spread laid out for them. John avoided her eyes and sat down. He was brooding and she didn't know why. Eating and talking about going to the campus today he remained silent and stared in his plate tossing his eggs around with his fork. Evangeline realized he was pouting. She smiled and knew he was disappointed that the night didn't end in his bed.

Once done Ming and Sam decided they would clean the kitchen to give Evangeline and John some along time. Evangeline smiled at the set up and she saw relief on John's face that she didn't object. They got up and wandered the castle, she hadn't spent many days here and the ones she spent were mostly in his bedroom because of the winter air whipping down the corridors.

He reached for her hand as they walked and she allowed him to hold it. He told her of his times here when he was a boy and how he would wander these halls for hours imagining he was a king hunting dragons. Evangeline heard the loneliness of his childhood and felt a bond between them, hers was just as lonely for other reasons.

Coming down a side corridor he pushed the large door open and cut on the light. There was an extensive wine cellar and he wanted to get some bottles for dinner.

"Wow…this reminds me of the cellar in the old Frankenstein movies…" she said hugging herself following him down.

John laughed "There you go with ghosts, what is with Americans and Castles anyway?"
Evangeline shrugged "I don't know about Americans but for me it's just all too surreal."

He went to the large wine rack and she looked around. There were some old books over on the table and she walked over brushing off the cobwebs. He saw her and smiled. "Historical documents of my family history."

Evangeline smiled at how rich and deep his history was. He had a lot to be proud of, turning she saw him going over bottle labels and admired him in his long sleeve white polo shirt and jeans. She always found him so masculine and sexy. "Did you ever bring Caitlyn here?"

John hands froze and he turned and looked at her surprised by the question "No..."
"But the kitchen…"
"I know she had it remodeled and hoped to do the rest of the castle so we could make it a second home. But she never stepped foot on the property."

Evangeline frowned. He loved this place and his wife was trying to make it a home for them but he never allowed her to come here? "Why John?"

Selecting a bottle he came over to her. "It held too many memories of you"
She looked at him surprised "What?"
"This was our place Evangeline and I came here regularly to remember our time. I didn't want to bring Caitlyn into that."

"Did she know that? I mean she had to question why she couldn't see a place that you treasured"

"She knew" he said sadly
Evangeline saw him look away pained at how horribly he treated his wife. Reaching she touched his face. He raised his head and looked at her. "Marriage is hard I know but John don't punish yourself anymore, trust me it doesn't help."

He went to her pinning her against the wall and kissed her unrepentantly. After the dream he had to act on it. She jerked in shock but relaxed and allowed the kiss. He held the bottle and wanted to drop it to feel her but instead he tasted her and softened because of her tender response.

Evangeline eventually pushed at him forcing him off her. He stared into her eyes and she saw the pain and love there. "I am such a blimey idiot for loosing you"
"I don't want to dwell on that anymore" she said softly
"I can't apologize enough for hurting you"
"I know John, I don't want anymore apologies. I just want too…."
He looked at her and saw her face darken. "What is it?"
"Nothing lets go."

Stopping her he pulled her back "What is it?"
"I'm married and we shouldn't be giving into this"

John looked at her confused "What are you talking about? Why do you pull out your marriage badge whenever I get close to learning something about you? What are you hiding from me?"

Evangeline looked at him angrily "Its not a marriage badge! I am married!"
"I know that sunshine but something is wrong….I saw it when you spoke to him, I bloody well aim to find out what has you locked away like this."

Snatching her arm away she stared at him saying nothing. John put the bottle down on the table. "Evangeline what is it? Why do you remain married to a man that hurt you the way he did?"

"Why did I come to another country and stayed with a man that hurt me just as bad?"
"Don't change the subject"
She rolled her eyes and John stepped closer. "What is it? Tell me?"
"My marriage is complicated!"
"So was mine…"
"You complicated your marriage! Its nothing like what's going on with me and Kevin.."

"Tell me about you and Kevin, why did he have the affair…"
Evangeline ran her hand through her hair and looked away "I don't know" she said softly

John standing now in front of her turned her face to his "Tell me why YOU think he had the affair."
"I don't know…"
"Yes you do sunshine, whatever it is that you think you did to have your husband cheat on you is why you remain trapped in that marriage."

"I love my husband!"
"Do you? Or are you supposed to love your husband? I say I loved Caitlyn but the truth is when she came to me and said she was pregnant I knew in that moment that I was supposed to love her. So I did that. I tried real hard, but I lost her in the end. For years I felt that God punished me for the lie and the way I failed my wife. I didn't have an affair but I carried another woman in my heart instead of her. And we both knew it."

Evangeline stepped back "I don't want to talk about this"
"I want to help you, let me in and I swear I won't hurt you"
Evangeline stared at him. "I'm his wife. It's my duty John…its what I'm supposed to do. You stay even when it's hard. It's my duty…"

John frowned at her constant reference of duty. She stood before him wringing her hands and he didn't understand what was eating at her. What she kept buried. He didn't know her as well as he thought. "Why do you think he cheated on you?"

"Because…"
He waited for her to say more and saw her eyes brimming with tears. She chewed on her bottom lip and looked down. He saw her face tighten with anxiety and he became more alarmed at what has happened to his sunshine. "Evangeline why…?"

"BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT HUSBAND'S DO!" she screamed and ran toward the stairs.

"Evangeline!" John yelled going after her but she was racing away from him. He didn't know what that comment meant but the way she fled from him made his panic over what was happening to her stronger. He had to find out what was hurting his sunshine.

Buchanan Jet

Kevin sat on the jet fuming. He was headed back to Llanview. He would have gone to England but he felt he needed reinforcements. Evangeline never betrayed him like this. She never openly defied him. When the affair happened she sunk into a deep depression and wanted him out of her bed but she never once mentioned leaving him. Now she was in another country with another man! This made no sense.

He soon found out while in Ireland that John Thomas was Sir John Thomas McBain and his rage in that moment had him wrecking his palatial suite in Dublin. That asshole came to town to steal his wife. Well he would show him. She was his period. Calling Lisa and telling her what was going on she was livid. He was returning home to get her and they would bring Evangeline home where she belonged.

Staring out of the window he swallowed his gin squeezing the glass. John McBain will rule the day he ever met them.