Chapter 2: Balancing
"Balance is not something you find; it's something you create."
-Jana Kingsford
Life was a balancing act. Everything needed its time and place, otherwise things would fall apart. That was a lesson Marinette was learning big time with everything going on in her life.
She missed the simpler times before she became Ladybug. All she had to deal with before then was school, design, and family and friends. All manageable for a girl her age. Now she was juggling school, design, family and friends, akumas, patrols, and... crushes.
She juggled school and being Ladybug. Akumas weren't on a schedule that worked with her school day, so she often found herself being late to class or missing class to go fight them. Her grades suffered but Alya was there to help her out, even if she didn't understand why Marinette was always late. Surprisingly, she became her class representative despite her tardiness and she worked to balance out those responsibilities along with representing the superheroes of Paris.
She juggled her passion to design and create with everything else. Finding a way to still create and make things while fighting Hawkmoth and school assignments was rough. If she didn't have time to design, it would bleed out into the rest of her acts: doodling on homework and tests, daydreaming up new designs during lectures, and redesigning akumatized villains outfits as they fought. So Marinette made time to design, even when it sent her to bed long after everyone else in her home had gone to bed or it made her late to a group meeting.
She juggled her responsibility to Paris and her time with family and friends. She strived to make sure her time as Ladybug didn't overwhelm the time she spent with her loved ones. When it did, she made it up to them by diving head first into their problems and solving them or doing something she knew they'd appreciate. She never realized that her loved ones didn't see this as her making it up to them, but her being kind, selfless, and supportive. When she had to suddenly disappear or decline an invite out so that she could secretly save Paris or patrol, her friends were okay because they knew she tried even if she disappeared mysteriously. However, Marinette vowed to work harder to balance that out.
Lastly, she juggled the hardest of all the balancing acts: crushes.
Man, those crushes.
Who knew that crushing on two amazing guys would be harder to balance than dealing with Hawkmoth and akumatized villains?
Her first crush threw her off kilter daily and totally. His amazingly silky hair, beautiful green eyes, and endless knowledge and kindness drew Marinette in like a moth to a flame. But this crush, as deep and as obsessive as can be, was bad for the overall steady position of everything else she juggled.
It threw off her balance in school. Starting from the day they met where she'd found him with gum at her seat only to fall hard when he offered her an umbrella. Sitting behind him in class now distracted her to no end, so her grades slipped almost as much as they did from becoming Ladybug. Of course she had to work even harder to tip the scale back to normal so school wouldn't slip through the cracks.
It threw off her friendships. Before he arrived at their school, Marinette and her friends had hung out and did normal friend things such as movies, sleepovers, study sessions. Now that all of her friends knew about her crush (as if she could really hide how embarrassingly caught up in him she was), most of their meetings revolved around him: setting them up and getting him to really see her. It wasn't entirely anyone's fault but she made sure to put even more effort into her friends: encouraging them, comforting them, being there for them. She didn't want them to resent her for having such an unbalanced dynamic where they were always helping her but she wasn't helping them and was always disappearing.
Finally, he himself threw her off. When he said her name or encouraged her. When he casually touched or joked with her. When he complimented or smiled at her. When he teased or stood up for her. Her inner balance was thrown completely off. She became extra clumsy. Her words came out as stutters or word soup. Her heart raced as her cheeks flamed and she floundered around for what to do or how to respond. Unfortunately, she was still struggling to find a way to balance out this affect so she made a fool of herself in front of him again and again. Thankfully, Adrien was as kind as they came and accepted her as she was and she couldn't help but fall even more despite the unbalancing chaos it encouraged.
Her second crush was almost the opposite. Beautiful cyan eyes, dark hair with dyed tips, and a soft smile that conveyed his kindness lulled her into a sense of comfort. To Marinette, Luka felt like the eye of a hurricane: the quiet and calm in the midst of the storm that was her life.
He balanced her out.
Whenever they were together, whether it was for Kitty Section or a happy run in, his calming nature gave her space to think and orient herself. Her homework got done. Her creative juices flowed. Any problems with her friends or family found their solutions. Her priorities were set straight. Even when Ladybug gave him the snake miraculous, he balanced out the battle with his observant nature and level headedness that Ladybug and Chat Noir lacked. Luka was amazing and she craved his presence almost as much as she did Adrien's.
That itself threw her off balance.
From the moment the umbrella closed on her face, Adrien had been an all consuming fire in her heart, leaving nothing for anyone else. His name or face alone was enough to make even Ladybug trip over her own feet. But now there was Luka's tranquil presence beside him, encroaching on the fire and steadying Ladybug's steps.
It was all very confusing. How could she have such strong feelings for two different people? And what would happen if she revealed those feelings to either one of them? Would it change everything? Would it throw off the already precarious balancing acts she had with everything else in her life? Could it make it easier?
Marinette didn't know what to do. Especially when they are all in one place at the same time and her thoughts of balance flies out the window as her heart burns and dances in their presence. All she can see are the most beautiful green eyes and all she can hear is the serene music that speaks to her soul. The rest of the world melts away and all she wants to do is to tell them both how she feels and let the scales fall where they may...
... but then the world materializes again as a pretty purple butterfly flies above their heads, Ladybug is needed, and Marinette's balancing act resumes.