Disclaimer: See previous disclaimer(s)
Warning: "Impure love" (boy loves another boy... sweet eh?), mushy Seto, overactive Katsuya, Mokuba! (nah just kidding. He ain't a warning.), bickering, swearing, OOC-tendencies are all over the place today too.
Note: I still have my stupid writers block, so this chapter came out sort of... fast paced. But it couldn't really get out any better (when it's done by me anyway) and..well... The chapter had to come out eventually.
Unheard Love
Chapter 9
by Growing Pain
It was almost nine o'clock in the evening when he arrived at his mansion. Though it was a lot brighter outside because of the shifting from spring to summer, it was still late. He suddenly wondered if Mokuba had eaten anything as he opened the main door leading into a dark, hollow hallway. It was almost dead quiet except for the faint sound of a TV in one room. Most likely in his little brothers habitation.
He gently removed his expensive shoes and placed them at the floor before fully walking inside, intending to greet his brother. It had been a long day. He needed to see him. After all, he was all he lived for.
As he walked up the stairs the source of sound was getting even more audible, confirming his theory that it was indeed from the raven haired boys room.
Seto gently knocked on the door, signalling he would come in, before opening it. He never really waited for a reply to come in, he did as he pleased.
"Hi Seto!" His brother said with a smile. The brunet also made a small, soft smile grace his lips as he nodded back in acknowledgement.
"You're late." The shorter boy confirmed.
"I had to wait for a file Koji was preparing. I wish for you to read and study it too, after I am done with it of course." The CEO said matter-of-factly.
"What file?" He tilted his head innocently when asking the question. A teenager now, but he still kept his innocence, Kaiba mused. As long as he never turned out like him, all was fine.
"On Arisu Ishikawa." It took a few seconds for Mokuba to register who his brother was talking about before getting back into the conversation once more.
"Why do you have a file on her?"
"In case an outsider wants to expose the truth."
"Who would that be?"
"No one in particular. It's always good to be prepared Mokuba."
"Yes, yes I know." The younger boy waved off, having heard that sentence many times when growing up.
"So I guess you will give it to me tomorrow?" Mokuba asked his older brother.
"Yes."
"Okay."
"…"
"…"
"Have you eaten anything today?" Seto questioned.
"Yes."
"What, and how much?"
"Um…chicken and rice. And around two plates." Good, that was a normal amount of food for a growing boy.
"Have you done your homework?"
"Yes."
"Good." The tall CEO turned around, attempting to leave so he could start reading. But his brother had other plans.
"Seto…?"
"Yes?" He asked, looking back to his younger sibling.
"Have you eaten anything today?"
"Yes…" He stated, hoping Mokuba wouldn't dig in even more. Since when was his food habits so interesting anyway? He was the older one, he was the one who had to make sure Mokuba got all he needed. Not the other way around.
"What, and how much?" The younger one mimicked.
"Breakfast and lunch. Now I really need to -"
"You didn't answer my question, big brother. What, and how much?"
"I believe you were present this morning."
"So what did you have for lunch then?"
"A sandwich."
"And?"
"Nothing more." Despite how this all must come out to his younger sibling, he could not lie to him. He either avoided the truth or answered truthfully. Seto never lied to him.
"What! Big brother, you need to eat more!"
"Mokuba, there is no need to worry. I have simply not been hungry today and -" His younger brother shot up from his bed, took his brothers hand and started to lead him down the stairs to the kitchen. Seto had an idea of what his sibling tried to do.
"Seto I made enough food for both of us today. There are left-overs you can have." The black-haired teen announced with a smile as he forcefully made his brother take a seat in a chair while he put some rice and chicken in the microwave. The CEO tapped his fingers impatiently on the table instead of arguing back. Who was he to deny his younger brothers cooking? Maybe he would get sad and take it personally.
Approximately three minutes later a sound escaped from the microwave. Now his dinner seemed to be ready. Just to be sure, Mokuba poked the chicken to see if it was any warm. To his delight, it was and he proceeded with handing over the food. The brunet took it with a grunt, but started to eat it nevertheless.
"This was not necessary." The older one said after a few bites.
"I know. But I did it anyway." Smiling, as usual. He loved that smile. If someone made it go away, he would personally destroy whoever it was. Why he was so happy, he did not know. Maybe he just appreciated the smaller things that Seto himself seemed to take for granted. Whatever it was, he was more than satisfied to have Mokuba in a cheery mood, even if it could get on his nerves at times.
Eventually Seto finished his meal and put the plate in the dishwasher. His brother was still there, eyeing him.
"Did you like it?" His voice was hopeful, wanting appreciation.
"Yes, it was very good. You're getting better at this." Seto stated. His voice held little emotion, but it was enough for the shorter teen to smile widely.
"You really think so?"
"Would I lie?" The smile grew. Seto loved it.
"It's time to go to bed now."
"Can't we stay up a little bit longer? Please Seto?" As much as he wanted to give in to the pleading eyes in front of him, he had to think of Mokubas health firsthand. And as a growing boy he needed to sleep at regular hours.
"No. Go up and brush your teeth." A sigh escaped from the younger one.
"You're no fun!"
"And you're not brushing your teeth. Upstairs. Now."
"Fine. Good night Seto." Two small arms warped themselves around him in a comforting embrace. Seto could not hold back his smile. He lived for him.
"Good night Mokuba." Low voice, but affectionate. The arms let go. The smile faded too, but the happiness inside didn't.
XxxX
It was Wednesday. Nothing in school had changed. His schedule was still the same, all the students still got on his nerves, and people still gave him feared glances when he came too close.
All but one thing was normal.
And that was the person sitting next to him. For some reason or another, Jounouchi had decided they should sit together in all the classes today. He hadn't voiced this decision to Kaiba, but the CEO figured that must be thing since the blond had been by his side through all the three first classes. If this persistent behaviour would last through the whole day however, was still a mystery.
Currently the blond was doodling in his math book instead of actually solving any of the problems. Kaiba on the other hand was already finished, and bored too. This was something his love interest seemed to notice.
"Already done?"
"Yes."
"That's good."
"Mhm…"
"…"
"…"
"Soooo…" The blond started to scratch the back of his head, probably feeling out of place. He could not deny that. It certainly was a peculiar situation.
"Spent any time with your girlfriend yesterday?"
"No."
"Really? Why not?"
"She is not here."
"Huh? What do you mean? Where is she then?"
"Out camping." Good thing he memorized the entire file yesterday evening.
"Camping? So soon to graduation?"
"Yes."
"Weird."
"…"
"…"
"So what did you do then?" Seto turned to Katsuya and glared.
"…"
"Well?"
"Why can't you keep quiet? It's in the middle of the class. Have you no perception on when it is and isn't appropriate to talk?" The shorter teen started to growl.
"Look Kaiba, I don't know what your problem is, but either tell someone about it so you stop being so damn pissed all the time, or just get over it!"
"Jounouchi? Care to explain to the rest of the class what you so loud-mouthly are talking about?" A strict voice asked. It was clear that the math teacher was annoyed with his student.
"Uh… N-nothing."
"Then you don't mind detention then?"
"What! But -"
"But what, Jounouchi?"
"It wasn't his fault." Kaiba declared. And for obvious reason, the whole class was in sheer chock. Oh how easily amused people seem to be. It's always fun to do the unexpected.
"Come again?" The teacher asked, wondering if he had heard wrong or not.
"I provoked him to a point he could not take it anymore. If you want to give out a detention, you have the wrong man." He showed his smirk arrogantly. A detention could be thrown away by the principal easily for him. And he had never really liked that teacher anyway. He was always after Jou, even if he did deserve it most of the time.
"Fine then Kaiba. You have been given a detention." His excuse to take the hit was lame, but no one could argue with him. They all cowered in fear. Scared idiots…
"Wonderful." He kept his cold eyes locked at the teacher with a taunting smirk until everyone started to mind their own business. Then he went back to his emotionless attitude and started writing a few solutions to business problems. Beside him he heard Katsuya clear his throat.
"Um…thank you." Came the hesitant gratitude from the blond. Since he did not get a reply he kept on going.
"You didn't really have to do it, you know…"
"His voice was annoying me. I wanted him to shut up and feel embarrassed. Nothing more."
"Oh…"
"Don't read into anything, it would be a waste of time."
"If you say so…"
Katsuya bit his lip and Seto continued writing. Why had he done that? Stupid hormones, clouding his judgement! It would all be much more easier if Jou actually resented, disliked or even hated him. But no, he decided to just, out of the blue, befriend him instead. Probably already knowing how he felt about him. Such a teasing idiot.
He clenched his jaw. No, he admitted with a sigh, Jou did not know. He had to stop making up irrational scenarios. It was already enough that he was in love with him. Things didn't need to get worse.
"Kaiba I -"
"Shut up."
"Huh?"
"Stay away from me."
"But -"
"Did you not hear me!"
"Fine! Fucking asshole…!" Katsuya muttered.
Good. He disliked him now. So he would most likely stay away from him too for the rest of the day. That was at least what his rational side was hoping for.
His other side, the weak side, wanted to go as far as embracing the other and drag him out of school, home to his mansion. But that would classify as kidnapping, he mused, mocking his own self.
And for the rest of class, neither Katsuya nor Seto spoke to one another. With the exception of an occasional glare or incoherent muttering from the blond.
The CEO didn't like it. Not one bit. But what could he do? What should he do?
He should keep quiet, ignore and forget about him. Problem was he didn't want to do any of those things. This was a bad day indeed.
XxxX
Fourth class, last period before lunch. The desk beside him… was empty. He had left him. Now he was amongst his group of friends, slouched down on his seat next to Honda.
Why did Katsuya have to be so sensitive anyway?
Seto was angry. With himself, with Jou, with that empty desk, with school and with pretty much everything at the moment. So he found himself glaring at the people around him, and at the teacher, who he had no idea what on earth he was giving a lecture about. He didn't care.
All that occupied his mind was Jounouchi. He wanted him back… even if he didn't really have him to begin with.
True, he had pushed him away by telling him off, but it was a mistake. Not that he would ever admit doing one.
He needed to think over this… Really think.
A sound of a chair moving over the floor was heard, attracting all the students attention. The tall, pale figure of the CEO had rose up from his seat, briefcase in hand, ready to leave.
"If you excuse me, but I have to go." And with no further adieu he led himself out of the room, closing the door behind him. If anyone wanted to question him, he could always get away with saying he had an important business meeting.
He stopped a few metres outside the door. Where would he go? Home? Work? A restaurant? If Mokuba saw that he was home when he arrived he would get suspicious, knowing that he didn't have any meetings scheduled this week. And to be frank, he had no intentions of letting his younger brother find out about his sexuality and his inescapable love, all in one day.
So… where should he think?
The door behind him creaked open, making the CEO wake up from his contemplating and turn around. And what he saw was no one other than Jounouchi. Why he had come here, he didn't know. Was it after him, or did he have to visit the restroom? And why did Jounouchi keep staring at him? Not that he wasn't staring back of course. That could probably explain it…
No one said anything, and it was eerily quiet between them. Though they held a firm eye contact with each other. Both looked troubled with the current situation but did not do anything about it. Eventually Seto had had enough.
"This is pointless…" Seto muttered. "If you have anything to say, say it now."
"…Why did you leave?" Katsuya asked in a firm voice and with curious eyes.
"Why did you?"
"Because I wanted to know why you left…" A small smile appeared on the blonds lips. "Plus I kind of have to go to the bathroom." Seto rolled his eyes inwardly.
"Well, no one is stopping you." He said harshly before walking away, brushing past Katsuya.
"Wait." His voice was low, coming out as a whisper almost. But he heard him perfectly clear. Jou had grabbed his wrist in the process, forcing him to stop. And there the CEO stood, one hand holding his briefcase, and the other pulled slightly backwards, held by Jounouchi. He should roar at him for touching him, but he couldn't. Couldn't even turn around to face him. What if he cracked?
"Let me go."
"But then you'll leave."
"Isn't that a good thing?"
"No. I still don't know why you want to leave."
"My company needs me."
"Liar."
"How would you know?"
"You looked troubled through the whole class. Something is bothering you."
"No."
"You can't fool me."
"…"
"…"
"Let me go, or I'll make you…" His wrist was free again and he gracefully placed his hand in his pocket. The air was heavy to breathe, it seemed to take a lot of his concentration to even stand up.
"…You're weird…" Katsuya said after a moment of silence.
"I believe you have already stated that once…" Seto answered, remembering when they danced. Though he tried to shake those memories out of his head. It had just been yesterday, why was he looking back at it after such a short period of time?
"I needed to say it again."
"Hn."
"So why are you leaving, in the middle of class?" His arms hung loosely by his sides as his brown eyes faced the back of the brunet.
"Why do you want to know so much?"
"It's in my nature to be curious."
"How good for you." Cold sarcasm dripped over his words. He was never the one to be warm anyway.
"Why did you take the blame in math?"
"I already told you why. Not that it makes any difference. If you don't get back to your class now, you'll probably get a detention anyhow…"
"I told him I had go to the bathroom."
"But you're not there. Such a revelation. The saint Jounouchi can lie." Seto said sarcastically with a smirk.
"And the asshole Kaiba can still be a prick." Katsuya muttered back with folded arms. Seto glanced at his watch. It was a little over twelve.
"Well, I have other places to be." And with that excuse he walked away from Katsuya. Where he would go, he didn't know. Maybe a library, those are known to be quiet. Or the park. After all, most people would either be at work or school. It wouldn't hurt to get some fresh air.
"I can come with you!" An enthusiastic Jounouchi said after him, just catching up.
Was this some sort of sign? Not that he believed in signs or supernatural but… Why was he so persistent? Was he like this to everyone who he wanted to be friends with? In that case, he should really re-think his strategy, because being constantly around a future acquaintance could really irritate most people.
"No, you may not."
Though being rejected, Katsuya still walked alongside with Seto, hands in his unzipped jacket while looking carefree.
"So where are we going?"
"There is no we. Only you and I. Where I go is none of your business."
"Hmm… I'm hungry." The blond voiced after hearing a growl from his stomach. Seto sighed.
"Then go and eat!" Katsuya smiled.
"Good idea, Kaiba! We'll go and have lunch!"
And with that said the shorter man dragged the taller one off to the school cafeteria, holding Kaibas hand tightly in assurance of that he could not escape. It did not happen peacefully however, as Kaiba continued to threaten to sue him for assault. The food-driven teen paid no attention to that and let his stomach guide him.
Now, to be fair to Jounouchi, he was no kidnapper. After all, if Kaiba really wanted to break lose from his clutching hand, he was very capable of doing so. Love just makes you do uncharacteristically things, as Kaiba continued to learn.
"You brought your own lunch, right?"
"Hmpf!" Seto uttered as he made futile attempts to shake away Jous hand, pretending very well that he did not like this act one bit. Luckily only a few students were out of class at that point in time, so they went by unnoticed. Otherwise he would have escaped from the blond-haired mans hand long ago. Image is important.
"And that means…?"
"Yes. Now let me go!"
"Nu-uh. Not until I know you won't run away."
"I am a free person. I am allowed to leave if I want."
"Yeah yeah, you keep telling yourself that." Katsuya said absentminded as he led the brunet to a table and, after some forceful persuasion, made him sit on a chair. Quite an accomplishment.
"Okay, I am going to buy some food now. Don't run away, or else!"
"Or else what?"
"I'll kick your ass."
"I think we both know you are unable to do so." Seto stated with a smirk.
"Then I will…uh…I'll sing! Yes! I will sing a love song in front of the whole school, claiming you were my gay lover that left me!" Jou declared with a grin. Kaiba suppressed an urge to blink.
"I believe that will only cause humiliation to yourself."
"Everyone wants gossip Kaiba, whether it's true or not." He stated knowingly. "You of all people should know that. So stay here, and I won't sing." Then he abruptly left in a hurried manner to get in line to buy some food.
What did he mean by 'you should know that'? Did this mean… he knew about Arisu? Or does he only believe that he does? Why did the blond had to cause so many troubles!
Deciding it was better to sit and eat with Katsuya than being chased by him while he is singing crazy love songs, he opened his briefcase and took out his lunch. Today Mokuba had made it for him, seeing as how much he liked his other food. So instead of his usual sandwich, he got three pancakes, one steak with potatoes and a cupcake as desert. The cupcake was bought of course, since the younger sibling had no time to make some that morning.
How the CEO was going to get all that down his throat was a problem. He would feel bad if he just threw it away or something similar.
"Whoa, that's a lot of food!" Jounouchi stated when he returned with a plate full of today's dinner.
"What happened? You hired some chef to cook for you or something?"
"No."
"Then why all this food?" Katsuya asked once more.
"I thought you wanted me to have more food after yesterdays conversation." Seto said, trying to get out of the subject.
"What? You brought more food because of me?"
"What? No! Mokuba made this for me, you idiot!"
"Aha… Well, who cares. I want to eat!" And with those wise words, he dug into his pile of food, enjoying every minute. Seto watched with a appalled face at the blonds non-existent table-manners.
"Would you actually close your mouth and chew instead of just throwing it all inside your big black hole!"
"Geez, sorry!" He answered with a glare, but reluctantly slowing down on the food intake. Now Kaiba could fully concentrate on his own eating. He started slowly with the pancakes, thinking that they are, after all, smaller. When he had finished his third, with quite a full stomach, Jou was already finished.
"Man that was gooood!" He said contently while rubbing his belly, smiling at the same time.
"You want more?" Kaiba asked, hopeful.
"I guess some more could go down. Why do you ask?" His blond eyebrow was raised, questioning.
"Here." Seto pushed forward his lunch to Jou, who looked even more bewildered.
"What?"
"Eat it."
"Why? Did you poison it or something!" The blond looked alarmed, but Seto glared at his accusations.
"I don't carry around poison in my jacket, you idiot!"
"Then why do you want me to eat it?"
"Because the food shouldn't go to waste!"
"…Those are the truest words you have ever spoken Kaiba." He said with a smile.
"Just eat it." The CEO said with a sigh.
"Will do!" And Katsuya happily started to ravish the offered food. Seto took this time to think what he should do.
Option number one was that he could stay, and eat with Katsuya, enjoying his company. Number two was that he could leave school, and Katsuya, right now and not look back. Number three, he only left Katsuya but still stayed in school.
A hard decision, since they all had good points to them. Should he trust his heart, as Yuugi so often teached?
Blue eyes glanced up at the blond, trying to find an answer appear out of nowhere. Katsuya had no idea of what was going on and only kept his attention at the food. The CEO snorted at himself.
Of course he should leave him, he had no reason to stay. Love is never a good reason. Never. But he would only follow. The shorter teen had proven on many occasions that he was stubborn too. So if he were to think it over rationally, Katsuya ran after him when he just left. But, if he were to tell him not to follow, before he actually got up and walked, he would probably respect his wishes. Because, for some strange reason, he was almost sure that would be the given respond.
"Jounouchi…" Calm voice and firm eyes tried to get the eating teens attention, and it succeeded. Brown eyes, so absolutely marvellous that Kaiba could stare into them for eternity without falling asleep, looked back with interest.
"You want to complain about my table manners again?" He asked with a grin. Why he would look so happy over that, the CEO had no idea.
"No, I wished to tell you that I will leave you now." His sentence was met by repeated blinks.
"Huh? Why?"
"I need to be alone."
"…Are you leaving school now?"
"No."
"I… I could come with you. If you want." He tried to hide it, but Seto could easily see Jounouchi seemed a bit tense. Can the guy not live without making friends with everyone?
"Preferably not."
"Oh…"
"So…" Kaiba stood up and took his briefcase in his hand, keeping the eye contact. "I suppose I will see you later in class. Goodbye." He turned his heel and walked away, as he had done so many times before. And he didn't look back, because he never used to either. But this time… Katsuya did not say good bye.
Maybe he had hurt him. Maybe he should go back. Maybe… he would lose him. But that would be a good thing, right? Of course, if Jou went back to his friends and told them some sort of sob story, they would all be after him. And then, there would be no end to all those friendship speeches, which all seemed to give each member of that nerd squad a kick every time they preached. Why they got a rush of adrenaline because of that, he did not know. And he really didn't want to either.
But he could live with the fact that they all wanted him to change, degrading his personality and complimenting theirs instead. The question was, could he live without Jounouchi?
His hands guided themselves subconsciously to his locket and opened it. Blue eyes looked down on the old, somewhat faded, picture. He had Mokuba, and would always be by his side. With him, he needed no other.
So yes, whether he liked it or not, he could and would live without Jounouchi in his life. He had to.
It's nothing that is open for discussion. He had had his little fun, imagining what it would be like to be near Jounouchi, but it had to end now. It had to. God knows what he might do if he spends more time with him. He made him weak, as pathetic as it sounds. And he was never that keen on weakness to begin with. So why couldn't he just hate him for it? Why did all seem good once he saw him smiling?
Love is a sickness. And he needed a cure. Badly. But how to end these feelings is a later problem. Right now, he simply needed to stay away from him. Self-control had always been a forte of his. He never really lost it before. Now imperfection was with him wherever he went. He could do better than that. Much better.
He raised his arm and looked at his watch. It was an expensive watch, nothing low would ever be allowed to come near him. How ironic, since all he craved was a poor man with no riches in his life.
He really had to stop thinking about him, he yelled at himself in his mind. Instead he should focus on the time. And right now, it was almost one o'clock. That meant their official lunchtime had started.
Suddenly he stopped in the hall, and looked out through the window. The sun was shining, the grass was green, and some students were eating outside, laughing. Mokuba liked it when it was warm outside, he remembered while smiling inwardly. Perhaps Katsuya enjoyed that kind of weather too…?
Already too tired to correct himself that he should not think about Jou, he started to muse instead. For some reason, he was picturing the two of them, walking on the asphalt together. Perhaps even holding hands. Not in a public place of course. But sometimes they could do that. And when a certain amount of time had passed in their relationship, the three of them; he, Jou and Mokuba, could all live together in the mansion. Then he would never have to worry about them. Both of them could smile, and he could watch, perfectly content with not joining in on the lip curving.
Grey clouds floated in front of the sun, blocking the light. A huge shadow was cast over the entire school yard. It didn't look inviting to go outside anymore. Nothing lasts forever, especially not good weather.
His thoughts did not differ. He still wanted to go out there, with him. Only him. But he could never have him, not like that. Dreaming was unhealthy, because it gave hope of something that would never be.
The display of the outside was not in his view any longer, as he had turned around and walked away, hoping he could do the same to his dreams as well.
XxxX
He sat alone in his chair, per usual, working before class. The difference this time was that he actually didn't use his laptop, but read through some papers instead, scrutinizing them carefully.
But all the concentration went away as always as soon as he heard that voice. For some reason his mind could block away all other sound, all but his voice.
Their eyes met and time stood still, as cliché as it sounds. But that was how it felt. That, and agonizing. Nothing else seemed to matter, and all things around them froze.
Jounouchi had stopped his tracks at the door, looking into his blue eyes. It seemed he wanted an answer, to know what he should do.
Most of all he wanted to order him to sit beside him and drag him home afterwards. Stupid, unrealistic dream. Fantasizing is for little children. It was still tempting though…
Remembering he had to push him away, Seto turned his stare to a glare, placing a frown on his face, snorting rudely. That made his love interest glare back, offended, and direct his walk over to his usual seat amongst his friends instead.
He was in control again, Seto acknowledged. Finally.
To Be Continued...
Words: 4971
Aw man, I am writing less now. I blame the writers block. Plus that seemed to be a good place to stop too.
Seto is making progress, eh? I mean this is the first chapter he actually allowed himself to fantasize about Katsuya. But on the other hand he pushed him away. Poor Jounouchi, he came too close.
Sorry if you aren't satisfied with this chapter. Please tell me how I can improve then