A/N: I'm sorry kiddos. I got lost in some thing else and I have a lot to do right now, But I'll try my best to update as soon as I can. I'm just so overwhelmed right now it's not even funny. Well... um, I'm more than likely really sorry about the chapter's extremely short length... but make due. Well, here.

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Ryou smiled. He always tried his best to smile. Despite everything that would happen, always across his lips would bound out a smile. He always hated that aspect of his being.

People would say, "Wow, that's crazy you can recover so quickly!" And always he would smile once again and nod. But inside himself he hated that. He wanted to grieve, stay sad longer. But somehow he wouldn't allow himself. Even after their death's he would just jump right up and go on. But... alas, he finally could not do this anymore. And in some sick way, he was happy.

In everyone's eyes, Ryou was the cheeriest one. He was always there… either to help, or to listen. So, basically a pushover. Well, afterwards... they'll think differently. And they'll actually realize he's a person... not a thing to be used and discarded. But he doubted so.

Death is a grim thing, that much cannot be denied. There are the people who think, "It's such a ghastly thing! Never speak of it again!" …acting like it'll never happen to them. Then there were the people like Ryou. The people who thought of death as regularity... the people who liked it. Hm. Maybe that's what makes him so …angsty. So weird. But he always lived by what his mother told him when he was young… "People can't accept what they can't understand…" How true those words were … back then he didn't understand, but now they came in clear as a bell.

Be happy Do what makes you happy. Being happy is grand. Friendship is everything! We have to do anything for our friends! Sometimes Ryou felt like slapping that damned Anzu.

Every so often Ryou felt a pain in his heart... One that hurt like hell. He went to doctors to try to figure out the anomaly... but alas none could. He was just diagnosed incurable and given pain relievers. These pains would come once in a while though... so it wasn't that big a deal. But when they came... they hurt. And sometimes... occasionally... Ryou wished these pains would take him out of this world... for good.

But it never happened and so he was still in this world. This pain filled world. Still breathing, still pretending.

Pretending…

He seemed to do that a lot now. He only did it because he felt that would make the world a happier place… and to make sure no one bothered him. He hated when people did that … when they pretended to care about his well being. He told himself he would rather be left alone. He tried CONVINCING himself he'd be better off alone and unattended to. But deep in his heart… he screamed for attention. He wanted help. He needed help.

But he would deny it. And keep smiling.