"You are amazing," Derek wrapped his arms around his wife of three years.
Addison smiled, gratefully. It was Christmas Eve and she had just finished an emergency C-Section on Nicole, Derek's sister that fell between Amanda and Sarah in age. The entire Shepherd clan had filled the waiting room and they had all breathed a sigh of relief when Addison reported that both Nicole and her son were doing fine.
"Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd, your patient, Nicole Evans, is asking for you," A nurse approached Addison.
"Go," Derek kissed her on the forehead, "Take care of her."
Addison entered the room where Nicole was cradling the infant in her arms and her husband was looking on proudly, "Nicole? How are you feeling?"
"I've never been so happy, thanks to you," Nicole answered, "Harry and I wanted you to know that we would like to name the baby after you."
"That means a lot to me, Nic," Addison approached the bed and softly ran her hand along the boy's cheek.
"This is Montgomery Andrew Shepherd," Harry announced softly.
Addison would later look back on this moment as more proof that she had been destined to join the Shepherd family. It was a moment that would help her through many of the rough patches she would face with Derek.
"Sarah, it's me, can you talk?" Derek propped the cell phone between his ear and shoulder as he sat on the grass and leaned against a tree overlooking the lake.
"Sure, Bubba, what do you need?" She agreed.
"Don't call me Bubba," Derek rolled his eyes.
"You'll always be Bubba," Sarah teased.
Derek gave an obligatory laugh to his sister's remark before turning serious, "I'm struggling, Sarah."
Sarah didn't respond; she was always the first person people came to when they needed to talk because she understood that silence was just as valuable as actually speaking.
"Sometimes, I can't even look at my wife, it's too painful. I remember what it was like to touch her, to be with her, to hold her in my arms. But when I consider it now, it almost revolts me. To know that someone else did those same things to her, it's unfathomable."
"Then why did you have her stay?" Sarah countered.
Derek was taken aback by his sister's question. He had a million reasons why he shouldn't forgive Addison. He had reasons to not let her stay. He had reasons to keep her at a distance. But he certainly had to have had at least one reason to not sign the papers.
"Bubba?" Sarah interrupted his thoughts.
Derek sighed and gave the only answer that made any sense to him, "Because she's Addison."
"And you're wondering if that one little fact is enough to keep a relationship with her," Sarah surmised.
"Well, me being Derek wasn't enough to keep her faithful," Derek agreed.
"Bubba, I've been married since I was 19 years old," Sarah began, "In 20 years, I've lost him and I've found him more times than I can count. There have been days, even weeks, when I questioned why I was even putting up with him. But it all comes down to when I look into the future, years down the road and I realize I don't want to have to face it with anybody other than Aaron. And that's what I'm willing to fight for."
"It's easier for you. Aaron never cheated on you. You have kids, you have something to fight for," Derek countered.
"Addison should be enough to fight for," Sarah rationalized.
Derek sighed, "Okay. Thanks."
"You can figure it out," She assured him, "Are you guys coming to Christmas?"
"I don't know if I want to bring her," Derek answered, "She doesn't feel like family right now."
"It's your call," Sarah said before hanging up.
Derek glanced at his watch to verify the time and realized Addison had probably been home from work for at least an hour. He sighed and got slowly to his feet, his discussion with Sarah weighing on is mind.
What he'd told Meredith was true; Addison was his family. But she had wounded him. Now that she was living with him, he had the desire to be as spiteful as possible. Hurting Addison gave him a sense of vindication.
That was nothing he would ever admit because she didn't deserve it. Maybe she didn't deserve his respect, maybe she didn't deserve his love and maybe she didn't deserve to be his wife, but he knew that she didn't deserve to be the victim of his bitter revenge. He sighed, vowing to at least consider what Sarah had advised, and entered the trailer.