AN: Read my previous chapter, decided that it was one of the worst that I have ever written. Eeps. Will try to remedy that with a decent chapter this time. It's longer than usual…LONG OVERDUE!

Well, a few chapters ago(during which two years have passed!), I talked about PMR. Now.. I face an even bigger challenge – what is known as SPM! Wish me luck.. It's about the same as GCSE O-levels I think…

To all my wonderful reviewers: Thank you thank you thank you! You all don't know what your reviews mean to me.. I was going to give up on this fic actually.. but now I guess I'll just have to complete it. Thank you once again for your comments and reviews!

By the way, I have NEVER posted this fic on ANY other site. I repeat. "A Journey" has never been posted on any other site. Therefore, if you see this anywhere else, it's definitely a fake, or someone stole my fic and posted it up there. Evilnesh… ;.;

Chapter 10 – Choices

Yaone knew that if she so much as twitched a muscle, she would die. The cold steel she felt on the flesh of her throat told her that clearly.

While Hakkai and Mirai were talking, Yaone noticed that the youkai holding her never stopped staring at Hakkai. Her unblinking gaze was very unnerving. Yaone wondered about these two demons' motives. Why were they doing this?

Almost as if echoing Yaone's thoughts, Hakkai spoke. "Why are you doing this?" he asked, addressing Mirai.

"Why?" asked Mirai, her voice low. She strode forward to Hakkai, and without warning, slapped him resoundingly. The force she exerted was so strong that his lower lip, after being jarred against his teeth, started bleeding.

Hakkai did not react, keeping in mind that Yaone was still in the grasp of the other demon, Hela. His blood trickled slowly down, dripping onto the ground.

"Look at my sister, Cho Gonou. Take a good look at her," Mirai said angrily.

Hakkai turned to look at Hela. She continued to stare at him, her gaze revealing nothing.

"What do you see?" said Mirai, narrowing her eyes.

Hakkai stood silent for a moment, thinking. He knew that his answer was very important, and might even cost Yaone her life.

He looked at the tale, pale demon, and gazed at her, taking note of her dark sombre appearance, and her empty eyes. She held his stare unflinchingly. Her eyes never left his, he noticed.

"She looks –" The first word that came to his mind was… sad. It was as if she had lost something important to her – something that was her whole world. He recognised it, having looked into mirrors several times after Kanan's death. However, Hakkai did not voice his thoughts. Instead, he frowned slightly, and finally hit upon what had been teasing his mind for a while. "She looks familiar."

Mirai exhaled. "Is that all you can say?" she burst vehemently.

Yaone felt the iron grip around her waist relax slightly.

Hakkai was still frowning slightly as he looked at Hela. Now that he had though about it, she did look oddly familiar. The long black hair, the pale face, the amethyst eyes….

His eyes widened as his mind flashed back to the awful time four years ago… tears falling to the floor… blood… his insanity… and what had woke him up.

"It's you…" He said, his voice breaking. "It's you……."

Hela looked at Hakkai, and she spoke, her voice soft. "You do remember me, do you?"

Hakkai nodded, suddenly feeling his throat constrict. "Yes…" he whispered.

Hela released Yaone, and walked forward. She reached out her hand, and she touched his cheek gently. He stood still, and looked straight at her.

Suddenly, a thick black mist shrouded both of them. Hakkai and Hela disappeared from view, their figures seemingly melting and merging with the darkness that soon swallowed them.

Yaone reacted almost instantly. She ran forward, but was thrown away by some unknown forcefield. She did not give up, and tried again and again to break through that strange fog. Eventually, she was tired out by her futile efforts and sank to the ground. Still not giving up, she pounded on the invisible force with all her might, choking in breathless sobs, calling Hakkai's name repeatedly.

She felt a tight grip on her left shoulder, and she looked up. Mirai stood beside her.

Yaone looked up at the beautiful youkai, and was shocked to see the entire change of composure. Mirai, who had seemed so tough and angry, was crying, and crying as if her heart would break. Tears were streaming profusely down her face, and she sat down on the ground beside Yaone.

"There's nothing we can do now, but wait," she whispered, more to herself than to Yaone. "Wait, and see what happens next."

Hakkai reached out his hands, and moved forward, encountering nothing. He had been wandering around in total darkness for what had seemed like hours, but still he had not come to anything. For all he knew, he was moving in aimless circles. It was hard to tell. The darkness seemed to press in on him, oppressive and overpowering. Hakkai had never been afraid of the dark, but the darkness around him now seemed menacing, ominous in a sense.

He allowed his mind to wander as he walked, and started. Hela was walking beside him.

The tall, beautiful demon, Hela.

"Cho Gonou," she said, her voice filled with a deep abiding sadness.

She touched his forehead gently, and his memories came flooding back.

She had woken him up from his despair and insanity.

She had ended his rampage.

He remembered…

A young man, with a lover lost…
Crazed thoughts…
The bloodlust that had come over him….
The demons that he had slaughtered without mercy…..
The tears that had woken him up….

He remembered.

He had killed the man she loved.

He remembered her lilac eyes that had been overflowing with tears as she wept by the side of her lover, whom he had slain.

He remembered how he had finally woken up from his dream, from his anger, from his mindless destruction of the demons…. How he had woken up to find his hands covered with blood.

He remembered how he had collapsed next to Hela and wept with her, a demon weeping for his victims and his lost love.

He had fainted, and awoke a few hours later at the same spot, but with a subtle difference.

He wore the demon-control earrings on his ear. He vowed never to lose control again.

He had only walked a short distance, when he collapsed – only to be found by a certain kappa, whose eyes and hair reminded him of blood.

Hakkai blinked as Hela removed her hand.

"You have the power to create…. Visions or illusions in minds…" he said, simply to fill up the uneasy silence.

"In all minds but my own," she said. "I would give…so much… to be able to see his face just one last time…"

Her tears flowed, and she looked exactly as Hakkai had remembered her as she wept by her dead lover's side.

"I'm sorry… though I know it means nothing to you," said Hakkai brokenly.

"I don't fault you." Her reply was startlingly clear through her tears. "You lost your love on that day too. I understand your pain, I understand your hurt….. And I understand why you did what you did."

"If you understand… then why all this?" he said, waving his hands around at the emptiness that surrounded them.

"Mirai actually wanted me to kill that beautiful youkai who's travelling with you." Hela's words sent chills down Hakkai's spine. "She is hungry for revenge."

"Kill… Yaone?" Hakkai's blood raced. He thought of Yaone, frail, and yet so strong at the same time. The woman he had come to love. She could never replace Kanan, but she was a whole different class of her own.

"She's outside with Mirai!" he said, his eyes racing wildly, looking for a possible exit in this strange void.

"Don't worry yourself. She won't be harmed."

"What?" By this time, the strain of all that was happening was starting to get to Hakkai. Could he bear to lose his love…again?

Kanan had killed herself before his eyes. Would he watch Yaone die too? Or even worse, just come across her dead body?

He loved her. He did not want to lose her again.

He had lost his mind temporarily when Kanan died. If Yaone died….he didn't know what would happen to him.

"I want to ask a favour of you," Hela said, breaking gently into Hakkai's thoughts.

"Yes?"

"…Give me permission to enter your mind… and to live in your memories… I can see my beloved just once more time."

"What do you mean?"

She broke down. "I cannot recall his face… and Mirai never met him. No one I know has any memory of him. I want to see him so badly, but my memory is blurred and dim. You are the only other living person who has ever seen him. The rest are…dead."

"That's all you want? I will gladly comply…"

"There is a catch."

"What is it," Hakkai asked.

"You will have to relive that day's events all over again… and this time you might even lose your mind. There is only so much stress that a mind can take before breaking, and you have gone further than most normal mortals do. You might become totally insane, and lost to the world. You might even go on a mindless rampage again, slaughtering everyone around you."

"Is this why I am encased in this..darkness with you? To prevent me from harming anyone?"

"Yes... you will not be able to escape, and even if you kill me, you will be trapped here forever."

"Which means you will kill me if I lose my mind?"

"Only if I need to."

He looked at her, and nodded. "I took away what you loved best. I cannot deny you this. Enter my mind and see him as you wish. Only I beg… do not harm Yaone."

"Of course."

"I am ready," he said, after calming himself down. "Do I need to do anything?"

"No…only relax."

He only felt a slight tickling and then a deep warmth in his mind… and the nightmare began again.

He felt the pain anew, as he watched Kanan die again…the grief searing through his soul…the madness filling his mind… and he watched helplessly through his own eyes as he went on the insane rampage and bloodbath.

The pain and hurt threatened to tear him apart once again, and his hands were stained with blood.

"Blood…on my hands…"

He had killed so many but the bloodlust was still upon him. He was like a crazy animal, not caring what he killed, only hoping that it would somehow lessen all the hurt inside.

He slashed and tore through hundreds. Blood, blood, blood spattered everywhere, but he could not keep away the haunting image of Kanan beautiful face as she drove the knife into herself.

Even as he killed, he felt the hot tears trickle down his face, mingling with the spatters of blood.

As he slaughtered the demons, he felt in him an overwhelming urge to die. He wanted to die, to join with his beloved Kanan again… just die and let everything go…

Here was the last demon…he came running up…Hakkai paused just briefly to look at him… dark hair, topaz eyes…and with one quick slash, another life was ended…

A raven haired female was running up…she was crying beside the dead body…

Hakkai lifted his hand to kill her too, but something stopped him… and he could feel his mind slowly tearing and shuddering… He wanted to fall into the black abyss inside…if he went in, he would never need to worry about anything again…he would never feel again…just sink into the comforting darkness and allow animal instincts to take over…

"NO!" A voice…

More tears?

A beautiful youkai female with purple hair reaching out to him…

He could see her hand outstretched before him… she wanted him to take her hand… It wasn't all lost… she would be with him…she would help him…

Hakkai reached out his hand, and held hers… and the darkness around him shattered…

And he looked up to see Yaone, her face tear-stained, but still beautiful.

Hela was sobbing on the ground beside him, and Mirai was holding her tightly.

Hakkai was kneeling on the ground, holding tightly onto Yaone's hand, and he too was crying.

She knelt down, and he felt her arms go around him in a tight hug.

He held onto her, never wanting to let go.

"You are my sanity…" he whispered to her. "I would have gone…"

"Shh.." she said, touching her hand to his lips.

They clung onto each other, and the tears that poured down their faces mingled as they fell to the ground.

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AN: Well, as usual, all comments and criticisms very appreciated.