A/N: "The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life."
Ficlet Fifty-Five: Swear Jar?
"Well, Neville," Hermione said pointing to the hieroglyphics in his book, "it's really quite simple. If you look closely...you can see that the Egyptian queen Nefertiti was the firs-"
"Hermione!" Ron gasped. "Did you just say tittie?!"
"Yah I did," she said. He held out the swear jar and she put in a knut.
"Ok, carry on." Ron returned to his work.
Ficlet Fifty-Six: Ass?
"Hermione," Ron said scooting next to her on the couch in the common room, "there's a Hogsmeade trip coming up this weekend. And I couldn't get anyone else to go....you wanna come with me?"
"Well as much as I enjoy being your back-up choice, I must ask you one question." She leaned over and got inches away from his face. "Is your head up your ass for the warmth?" She returned to her Ancient Runes essay.
"What a tease," Ron got up and ran to his room crying.
Ficlet Fifty-Seven: Lindsay Again? Who Is She Anyhow?
"Hey! Dude!" Ron yelled grabbing Harry's arm in the hallway. "I want you to meet someone. This is my friend Lindsay. I met her when I knocked her down in the hallway once."
"Hey Lindsay," Harry said, "it's nice to meet you."
"Hi, what's your name?" She asked.
"My name's Harry....but most people call me....uhhh...Harry."
"Nice to meet you Harry. You're hot. You're so hot. Run away with me!"
"What?"
"Huh?"
"Go make me a sandwich bitch!" Ron said.
A/N: I admire a man who drives clear across town to a distant shopping center where no one knows him, and rides all afternoon on the children's coin-operated "horsie."