Chapter 25:

The tension in the air could be cut with a magically transfigured knife. The whole room seemed to be in their own kind of turmoil as a laboured silence had fallen. Saffron was worried she was losing them. The magic box was still lit warmly, which did not match the mood, and the evening was still young. To onlookers from the outside, it may appear to be a meeting between an employer and his employees, but this was nothing like that.

"Saffron and… Spike?" Xander said again, as Anya listened but stayed silent. She didn't see it as very shocking.

"They're together?" Willow repeated in shock, looking to Tara for support. Tara avoided looking at her, which made Willow frown.

"This is bloody ridiculous" Giles snapped.

"Is it a spell? It must be a spell" Xander asked the room. He was the most vocal about his outrage.

"It's him. He's been manipulating her from the start" Buffy pointed her stake at Spike, who stepped back out of instinct, but didn't let go of Saff's hand.

"Hello? We are still in the fucking room here" Saffron finally spoke up. She had let them get it out of their system, but it had been an hour now. "Uh, sorry Dawny. I meant 'flipping room'…"

"She didn't" Spike winked at Dawn which made her smile widely. She had always liked how Spike spoke to her like a normal person.

"Saffron. You said you would end it. What happened?" Buffy asked, still standing close to Spike, glaring at him.

"Look, Buff, I know that I-"

"Wait, does this mean you knew?"

"Well, Riley led me to believe they were just sleeping togeth-" Buffy cut herself off, realising Dawn was still in the room, "Dawn, why don't you do your homework in the back room?" Dawn responded by rolling her eyes but staying firmly stood where she was, next to the couple.

"Hold on, Riley knew too?" Xander asked incredulously, "Way to keep me in the loop"

"Well, I didn't think there was anything to tell. She said she would end it"

"Ok, ok. I get it. Bad Saffron, lying. I'm sorry but I knew you would all start raining on the whole I love Spike parade if I told you" Saffron explained herself briefly. Spike grinned again smugly as she repeated that she loved him. He squeezed her hand, knowing she needed reassurance, but also enjoying himself and the chaos the was happening around him. Saff could feel his enjoyment, but her own dread for being cut out of the group, her family was stronger. Xander and Buffy both scoffed when Saffron said she loved him and Giles almost completely boiled over in anger.

"How could you!?" Giles had been mostly silent until this point. Scarily silent. He pointed a finger at Spike. The pair stared at each other until Saffron stepped in front of them.

"G, please…" Saffron pleaded for him to stop. Giles shook his head at her, as if he pitied her. But Saffron could feel that he was mad at her. In a big way, almost as much as he was at Spike.

"You're making a grave mistake, Saffron. All he wants to do is keep you locked away in the dark, he could be The Corrupted one for all we know!"

"You don't know anything about us, Giles" She snapped, tired of this merry-go-round of hell she couldn't get off.

"I know him. I know the countless innocents that he has killed. I know he tried to kill you, your cousin and I know that he would still be doing it now if it wasn't for the initiative"

"All you know is what's written in books. I know him" She looked back at Spike and smiled at him, Spike could tell she was upset so he tried to show that she was doing well with a smile of his own. The others all looked some degree of appalled or shocked at the pair.

"Willow, do you wanna weigh in?" Xander tried to appeal to Willow to back them all up, "Can't you check for some freaky love spell"

"I don't think it is a spell, Xand. I can't feel anything, and I could if there was potent magics around" Willow paused, unsure what to say about what Saffron had revealed, she was shocked. "But i-if it is true, the only problem I have is that she didn't tell me"

"Will, you know I would have-" Saffron tried to explain.

"Like I did with you?" Willow replied, unusually cold. Saffron winced, her disappointment was like pointed shards of ice throughout her body. Willow meant that she had trusted her first and Saffron had just hidden everything from her. Again.

"How can that be your only problem!? It's Spike we're talking about here. William the bloody. Mr I'll-put-spikes-through-you-if-you-bloody-look-at-me-wrong" Xander ranted, completely angry and confused at both of them. Saffron looked around the room again. Giles was shaking his head curtly and the experience of her father figure disapproving stung. Buffy was pacing and gripping her stake tightly, looking at Spike every so often. Xander was red in the face and Anya was trying to calm him down, and Tara was still sat listening to the room.

"After everything, you promised. You promised you wouldn't keep things from me" Buffy looked close to tears when she said this, but Saffron knew they were tears of betrayal and frustration. She hated that she made Buffy feel like this. Saff didn't have any words for her. She knew this was her fault, but it was that or watch her stake him.

Saffron couldn't stand it any longer. She scanned the room again, feeling her friends anger and how upset they were. She couldn't stay here feeling how they felt. She gave Dawn, the only one that had verbally supported them, a watery smile before turning to Spike.

"Take me somewhere else?" She whispered to Spike, tears in her eyes.

"With pleasure, pet" He said as he led her towards the door of the magic box. He glared at them all for making her feel this way. Some of them were still ranting as they left the shop and Dawn was trying to get her words in to support the couple, but the group were ignoring her.

xoxoxo

The three girls were in the waiting room of the hospital. Joyce had revealed she had to go in for more tests when Saffron had finally got home the night before. All of the girls had travelled with her in silence, Buffy was still upset about her revelation and they were all worried about Joyce. They hadn't spoken since she had left with Spike the night before and she had barely acknowledged her presence.

"You've put us all in danger by letting him in" Buffy finally spoke up as they were in the waiting room, "First rule of our family, don't let any men with bumpy foreheads into our lives" She added.

"Oh yeah, because there isn't one of us that isn't guilty of that" Saff replied flippantly. She was over the blame game already. They were both whispering as Dawn was sleeping soundly between the pair.

"This isn't a joke. If he knows about Dawn-"

"He doesn't" She snapped back, "But I know I could trust him if he did"

"This is so you. You're meant to be this empathetic person who knows it all, but you put us all in danger!"

"And this is so you, Buffy. Pretending that you know what's best. Well you don't, you're barely older so don't start telling me what to do with my life. You and Angel loved each other"

"This isn't fucking love, Saffron" Saffron widened her eyes at Buffy swearing, it seemed so harsh coming out of her mouth. It confirmed that she was angry, "It's sick. He's using you. Can't you see that?"

"He loves me" She stated. Buffy snorted at the idea that Spike could love anyone. She didn't reply for a while, she seemed in deep thought. She looked back over at her cousin and sister and shook her head. How could neither of them see that Spike was bad news.

"What hurts the most is that you chose him over your own family. You say that we're like sisters or the Scoobies are your extended family, but where was that when you were lying to our faces?" Buffy bit back, no longer whispering. Dawn stirred from Saffron's lap at Buffy's words.

"You're telling me you didn't prioritise Angel over us? Over me? You're a walking talking hypocrite" Saffron replied. Thinking back to all the times she had been in danger because of how Buffy had felt for Angel. She had never blamed either of them for that. "It should be Buffy the hypocrite, not the vampire slayer" Saffron hissed, moving Dawn off her lap awkwardly so she could storm off to the vending machine. It hadn't been her best line so she was trying to exit before Buffy could retort. Dawn woke up and yawned widely, her eyes were struggling to stay open as she tried to figure out where she was.

"Did I miss something?" She asked sleepily, as Buffy shook her head and told her to go back to her nap. Dawn sleepily nodded her head and adjusted her position so she could lean against Buffy instead.

Meanwhile, at Revello Drive, Spike was looking through the cupboards in Saffron's basement room. She asked him to bring her favourite jacket, she hadn't had chance to put it on when she had heard Joyce was needed for more tests. He had decided to keep his distance for now, but he was planning on visiting her later, he knew how hard she was taking everything, and he needed to be with his love. Spike heard the front door open and paused, it couldn't be any of the Summers girls. He heard the footsteps above him pause before making their way to the basement. Spike rolled his eyes; he could smell who it was now.

"Spike? What are you doing in here?" Riley asked, standing with his arms crossed at the top of the stairs. Spike decided it was none of his business and carried on looking for Saff's jacket. Riley made his way down the stairs and grabbed spike's shoulder, spinning him round.

"Well, in case you hadn't heard the other night, I'm the boyfriend. I'm allowed in here and you're bloody well not" Spike said, shoving his shoulder away from Riley's grip.

"Boyfriend?" Riley asked, not sure what he meant. He hadn't been at the magic box when Saffron declared her feelings and Buffy hadn't really been filling him in lately. Spike smirked at this and shook his head, looking for that stupid jacket again. If it's her sodding favourite, why doesn't she keep it in an obvious place?

Riley grabbed the lapel of Spike's leather jacket and pulled him towards the stairs, not believing that Spike had a right to be there.

"Watch it, you're bruising the leather!" He shouted, "Saffron and me, we're in love" Spike smiled and raised his eyebrows, receiving a punch from Riley.

"There's no way anyone could love something like you"

"From what I heard, nobody's in the business of loving you, mate. Seems more of a you problem" Spike shrugged smugly. Referring to something he overheard Xander telling Saffron in confidence recently. Riley had revealed that he knew Buffy didn't love him, and Xander ended up revealing it to Saffron.

"Me and Buffy are- we're solid. Can't say that about you and Saffron. From what Buffy says, she goes through men quite… quickly" Riley said calmly.

"Oi, watch it!" Spike shouted at the implication Saffron went out with a lot of men, he went to punch him but gave himself a horrible headache instead. That moment did remind him of something Riley said though, "Oh and that's why you're at the hospital with them now? Cos you're so bleeding solid"

"Hospital?"

"Didn't she tell you? Joyce is sickly, girls went with her, the little bit too" Spike explained as Riley looked confused. Nobody told him, Spike thought with glee. Riley turned around without another word and ran up the stairs and out of the house. Spike shrugged and went back to looking through Saff's room for the jacket.

xoxoxo

The lighting in the hospital waiting room was bright and clinical. Saffron hated the smell of hospitals and wished more than anything that Joyce would be okay despite the shadow they had found. The smell of bleach filled her nose as she shivered from the cold, she had forgotten to bring her jacket. They had all been sat in silence since she got back from the vending machine, Saffron didn't want another argument, especially since they were all so worried about Joyce. She opened her can of pop and drank slowly, offering Dawn a can too. She slouched back in her chair and rested her head, looking up at the ceiling. The light above her head flickered on and off every now and again. Riley was with them now and he was whispering words to try and soothe Buffy, but Saffron could feel that he was annoying her more than anything. She went back to staring at the flickering light.

One. Two. Three. The light flickered and stopped. Dawn had copied her cousin now, slouching like her and staring at the light. One. Two. Three. It made a noise as it flickered, as if it was trying to communicate to them using some kind of code.

"Three" Saffron whispered, as the lights flickered in the same pattern above them again. Dawn frowned and looked to see what her cousin meant but went back to looking up when she saw that she was doing the same. They stayed like that for a while and Dawn moved to lean against Saffron's shoulder while she continued to watch the lights flicker with a fascination that Dawn couldn't match. Spike rounded the corner and stopped when he saw he was finally in the right waiting room. He had a black, zip-up hoodie in his hands that Saffron hadn't worn in a long time and she stared at it for a second before meeting his eyes. She stood up to greet him but faltered when she heard someone speak up.

"What is he doing here?" Buffy asked, standing too and crossing her arms. Riley followed her and did the same. Saff rolled her eyes at this. Fucking lap dog.

"You're not the only person that needs support, Buffy" Saffron said sadly, trying to make Buffy see.

"She's not even your Mom!" Buffy shouted and Saffron winced at her words. The malice behind them stung her and she felt tears welling up in the back of her eyes. She blinked them away quickly as Spike wrapped his arm around her waist protectively as if he could protect her from the slayer's words. She leant into him and Spike squeezed her waist, silently showing he was right there with her, Buffy paused at this, it was almost as if there were real feelings there. She shook that thought out of her head.

"Buffy, that's not even true! She is, Saff's one of us!" Dawn weighed in, shocked at how harsh her sister had been. Buffy looked conflicted, she seemed horrified at what she had just said. Saffron could feel it but didn't say anything. She wasn't mad at Buffy, just upset. Saffron and Spike went to sit down on the other side of the waiting room, with Dawn following them.

"Uh, I brought a different jacket. The other's bloody impossible to find" He said, looking embarrassed that he couldn't do this one thing for her. Saffron took the black hoodie and smiled tightly, kissing his cheek as a thank you. "Uh, I thought you might like these too" Spike showed her the tarot cards he had found and she smiled and shoved them in her pocket. Dawn started talking then, babbling nervously about anything and everything. The couple let her talk, she obviously needed it. Saffron laced her fingers between Spike's as Dawn spoke, and Spike softly rubbed his thumb on her hand while they waited. Saffron could feel Buffy stewing from across the room, she didn't seem pleased to be in Riley's company either. If Buffy ever spoke to her again, she told herself to ask what was going on with them. She could also feel her cousin's guilt over what she had said. Saffron leaned against spike's shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her and kissed her forehead lightly as Dawn continued to talk.

The doctor came in and interrupted Dawn complaining about an injustice that had happened in school. Both Spike and Saffron were relieved when she tailed off, but that was replaced by dread when Saffron saw why. The doctor was back. The other girls went up to him as he broke the news.

"Your mother… she has a brain tumour" the doctor explained. Saffron's knees buckled and Buffy quickly responded by holding her up. No matter what had been going on between them, they needed each other. The doctor sat down with them and started to discuss everything. Neither of them could take anything he was saying in, they held each other's hands as if they hadn't been fighting moments before. He kept asking them questions that they weren't sure how to answer. Saff hugged her cousin, despite everything. They needed each other now more than ever. Ben came and told the doctor her was needed and they thanked him, they had been so overwhelmed. Tears were rolling from Buffy's eyes as Dawn walked over cautiously. Saffron gestured with her head for her to sit next to her. All three of them hugged and tried to comfort each other. Ben left them to have some time to themselves and Spike and Riley watched their girlfriends with concern between glaring at each other.

"Saff, I'm sorry. None of it, none of it means anything…" Buffy said, wiping the tears from her face.

"Hey, I know, okay? I know. I'm here" She confirmed she was feeling the same. Dawn cried as the older girls spoke, confirming that things between them were civil for now. They needed each other more than ever. Riley offered to take Dawn out while the girls sorted insurance and things like that at the hospital and Spike slipped out to get himself some blood from a different floor.

xoxoxo

Saffron was stood behind the till in the Magic Box. Giles had told Buffy he would understand if Saff came in later than usual because of Joyce. He hadn't spoken to Saff since she had told them all about Spike. She hadn't made an effort with her appearance today; her mind had been on other things. On everything. She was wearing a band t-shirt, ripped jeans and the black zip-up hoodie that she didn't remember owning before Spike had found it in her room. She had forgotten to put on her jewellery that morning and she felt almost naked without her silver rings and necklaces. She barely looked up when Riley walked in, he was busy talking to Giles and Xander anyway. Saffron had decide to stay clear of the three of them, she was having a rough week without the men making it worse by making her feel guilty for being with Spike. She thought about spike then, how good he had been to her since Joyce had been sick. He offered to take on more patrolling so her and Buffy could stay at the hospital and he was always close by when she felt like she was falling apart. She felt so lucky to have him. Why couldn't any one else see the good in him?

"Hey, Giles? Could I have a minute?" Saffron asked, staring down at her bare, ring-less hands, still not completely in the room. She was thinking of the three again, it was always in the back of her mind. She decided it must mean something, the dreams and the messages had only started since the demon-woman had come onto the scene.

"I'm busy, Saffron" Giles snapped, walking past her and checking the invoices again after Anya had revealed that he had sold items he shouldn't have done to Glory.

"G, it'll take a moment… it's about the-"

"I can barely look at you after your… revelation." Giles almost spat the word revelation, Saffron visibly winced at the venom surrounding her. She could feel his anger and disappointment and it felt like someone was sticking pins in her. Poisoned pins. His feelings were clear and her fears were coming true. She was losing them. She nodded sadly but tried to keep her cool as she walked towards the front of the store, closing the curtain behind her and sat down where she would usually take readings. She put her head in her hands, allowing herself this moment to release all of the emotions swirling around in her head. She wiped away a few stray tears and collected herself. Breathe.

Saffron managed to plaster a smile onto her face and left her sanctuary and started to walk back towards the till. She made sure to avoid Giles at all costs. It hurt to see someone she had seen as her father-figure not want to even look at her. She made sure to keep herself busy, chatting to customers and replacing chicken feet when the jars got empty. Chicken feet were always popular towards the end of the week, Saffron noted to herself although she wasn't sure what she could do with the information she had noted. She noticed that her younger cousin was sat at the table, hunched over her notebook and covering it with her hands so nobody else could see what she was writing. She felt a strong wave of nerves and anguish crash into her as she moved closer to her cousin. It was as if someone had thrown a bucket of iced water over her head as she felt what Dawn did.

"Hey Dawn chorus, where did you go with Riley?" saff asked, sitting herself down next to her cousin, who was also visibly upset about her mother being in hospital. Saffron picked at her blood red nail varnish for something to do with her hands.

"The carousel" She said, not looking up from the notebook she was writing in.

"Man, we should go back there all together. Do you remember the birthday you had there?" Saffron asked, thinking about that first year in Sunnydale.

"Yeah, we both got sick from all the candy floss we ate" Dawn smiled softly at the memory. She had enjoyed that party, despite not having any friends that came.

"Yeah and J said she had never seen us all so happy" Saffron thought, remembering that Dawn's party and the carousel must have never actually happened. She frowned, she remembered the sticky taste of the candy floss and the first time she had smiled properly since coming to Sunnydale. It had been fun and it had been a time for all four of the women to bond properly. How could it not be real? She looked at Dawn, her emotions hadn't changed, she really didn't know she was the key. She was feeling the same nostalgia that Saff was. Saffron had become lost in her own thoughts, wondering how to come to terms with Dawn being the key. She tried to shake herself out of those thoughts, she's still your cousin. You're meant to be comforting the poor girl, she told herself strictly.

"Do you think she'll be okay?" Dawn said quietly. Saffron looked at Dawn, who had stopped writing in her book. The younger brunette had watery eyes and a look in her eye that suggested she trusted Saffron to tell it to her straight. But she couldn't do that, not this time.

"Hey, you saw her! J's a tough cookie, you know she can handle anything" saffron smiled, "She'll be home in no time" Saffron added, hoping with everything she had that her words would turn out to be true. Saffron could feel that Dawn had relaxed, she was still worried but this affirmation from her cousin had calmed her down. This meant that Saffron's own mind was clearer now that Dawn's was eased. She hugged her cousin and thought about how often she wished life for them could to be normal. No key, no illnesses, no vampires or soulless boyfriends that make you lose your closest friends.

It was the end of day and Saffron was in the stock room of the store, double-checking everything that had been bought and made a quick note of what needed to be ordered in for next week. Mostly though, she was keeping her mind off worrying about Buffy. She knew their relationship was rocky at best at the moment but it didn't stop her caring about her cousin, especially when she was risking her life again looking for some big snake made by Glory. Saffron slowly walked back up to the shop floor but could hear a muffled conversation through the door. It was about her. She caught that it was Xander and Giles talking, so she stayed behind the door to hear what they had to say while she was out of the room.

"I am having trouble speaking to Saffron, I simply do not understand what is going on with her. Especially at a time like this…" Saffron rolled her eyes at this, every day was 'a time like this' in Sunnydale. Does this mean she wasn't allowed to be happy? Fall in love? She crossed her arms, not liking where the conversation was going.

"Yeah with bleach boy always in the background, she might be double-crossing us all" Xander added. Saffron had heard enough and stepped out from where she had been listening.

"Me and Spike are together, nothing you can say will change that. I meant every word" She said loudly, commanding every eye in the room on her. She was firm in her choice of words and she was hurt that they thought so little of her, that she would change her whole belief system because of her new relationship.

"Saff-" Xander's eyes widened in panic as he started to explain himself, but he was quickly cut off.

"I mean it. There's no curse, hex, spell or blackmail that has made this happen. We love each other" She repeated again. She met everyone's eyes as she said it, willing them to challenge her. Everyone except for Giles backed down. They knew what getting on the wrong side of Saffron looked like. It was ugly.

"This isn't love Saffron. This is bloody ridiculous. I can't support it" Giles said hotly.

"So don't" She shrugged, "You don't have to like it, but it's not fucking changing anything" She bit back, not backing down again. She decided she would have to own it. She wasn't ashamed. She walked to the corner of the room and started to organise the bookshelf that had been left in a mess by the customers. She was stuffing books into the correct place, slamming them onto the shelves, trying to cool off. Willow walked over to her quietly and took a book in her hands.

"Nice book, it's got a good heft to it" Willow whispered, aware that Saffron was still recovering from her outburst. Willow herself had recovered from her shock that Saffron and Spike were together and had realised almost instantly that Tara had known before Saff had announced it to the group. "The better the heft, the better the book. That's what I always say" willow babbled, not sure how to move the conversation back to Spike.

"Not once in your life have you said that before, babe- uh, Willow" Saffron corrected herself, unsure if they were still close enough to use their usual language with each other.

"Saffy! Just because you've never heard me doesn't mean it isn't a motto I live by" Willow chuckled, glad that Saffron wasn't angry with her directly after what she had said when she had told them about Spike. Saffron smiled too, but she couldn't shake the worry she had beneath the surface.

"Do you hate me Will?" Saffron whispered suddenly, unable to meet her eyes.

"No! It was a-a shock. And I wish you had said something to me…"

"You don't know what it's like, Will! I felt like I couldn't be myself around any of you in case you hated me just for loving him" She explained, feeling stupid as soon as she said it. She felt even more stupid when she saw that Willow's face indicated that, of course, she knew exactly how that felt. Times ten. Saffron went red and stared at her shoes, muttering an apology for not thinking.

"We all care about you, Saffy" Saffron snorted at this, based on Giles' reaction, "You're my best friend and I want you to be happy, just like you wanted me to be happy with Tara. You didn't care when I lied about being with her you just accepted me, and I should have done that for you. I'm the one that should be sorry" Saffron smiled at Willow's speech through watery eyes. She put the book back on the shelf and launched herself at Willow to hug her.

"Does that mean you're ready for that double date then?" Saffron smiled as she hugged her best friend.

"If you're ready to be beaten at the Sunnydale Bowl-o-rama!" Willow beamed and Saffron laughed at her friend's goofy enthusiasm, and the idea of Spike bowling. The rest of the room was paying attention to Dawn and Buffy in the centre of the room. Saffron hadn't realised that Buffy had entered the store and was talking to Dawn. She turned to look at her cousins and tried to catch up on what had been going on.

All at once, a large snake crashed through the store-front and knocked over the curtain pole that separated Saffron's tarot area with the rest of the store. The snake bull-dozed the table and all of the trinkets she had set up and Saffron watched open-mouthed as the snake threw a bookcase onto Buffy. The snake reared towards Dawn and saffron sprinted to try and grab Dawn out of harm's way. They both paused, stood next to each other and Saffron had taken Dawn by the hand to pull her away. But the snake seemed to be staring at her and just as quickly it turned and left the same way it came in. Saffron knew what had happened and she looked over to Buffy who was moving the bookcase off herself. Saffron rushed over to help her up.

"It knows" Buffy whispered and Saffron nodded.

"Go, I'll stay with her" she murmured so that Dawn couldn't hear that they were talking about her, and Buffy squeezed Saffron's shoulder that she had been using to help her get up. No matter what had been going on recently, they knew they could trust the other to protect Dawn in their own way. Buffy ran out of the door towards the direction the snake went in and Saffron turned to her younger cousin with a reassuring smile that didn't meet her eyes.

A/N: Thanks again to Megs063 and to the guest that commented since my last update! Hope you enjoyed the chapter! I've planned out (not written lol) the whole of seasons 5,6 and 7 now! The problem is, it will end up really really long if I can actually write as much as I've planned! Would you even want to read something that was so long (considering how long my chapters usually are)? xoxo