A/N: Thanks Nott01 for the comment, I have decided I will just write it all in this book! I hope you enjoy the chapter, I have really enjoyed writing this story so far and I hope you like reading it! xoxo

Chapter 26:

Ring-a-ring-a-rosies, A pocket full of posies…

Saffron walked cautiously, a chill ran up her spine as she moved deeper into the evergreen forest. She didn't know where she was, the forest looked a lot like a picture book her father would read to her before bed when she was a child. She kicked and stumbled on a root that was sticking up out of the thick undergrowth. She pulled herself to her feet and continued through the forest. An owl shrieked and she whipped her head around. It was getting darker and there were no lights except the moon that was slowly being covered by angry clouds, she shivered but carried on going forwards.

She eventually came to a clearing in the forest, it wasn't intentional, but she couldn't stop herself smiling when she realised she found something that wasn't just the same tree repeated. A clearing meant hope, a possibility to get out. She stared up at the vast expanse of the sky, it was as if she was staring into swirling galaxies the kind you could only see from space. She was bewitched by the sky, it was so big and she could see so many stars. She heard a faint hum, gradually getting louder which brought her attention to ground level. There were three girls stood holding hands. They started to skip around in a circle, anticlockwise. Their pace getting faster as they continued to hum the tune to an old nursery rhyme. She couldn't make out their faces, but she felt like she knew them. One girl glowed green, her dark brunette hair hung to her waist. She was the youngest of the three. One Purple, her short brown hair was tied back, flicking behind her as the girls spun in a circle. The middle child. The other, a dreamy silver. Blonde, stronger than the others. The eldest. She had strength beyond her size and years. Saffron's eyes couldn't move from the scene before her it felt so familiar but how could it be? She was on the outside looking in. She wasn't included in this fairytale.

As the girls spun in the centre of the clearing, each glowed as bright as fireflies with their own defining colour. The middle of the circle started to compress, their colours all intertwined together, bathing the clearing in bright light. Then, just as suddenly as they starting to spin, the light stopped and she saw them all drop to the ground as if they were dead weight.

A tissue, a tissue, We all fall down…

Saffron woke up slowly, her eyes thick with sleep as she tried to open them. She didn't know where she was, the bright white light almost blinding as she managed to keep her eyes open. Then she remembered. Joyce and her tumour. She screwed her eyes up, she wished it would all go away. She was so worried about Joyce and Spike didn't seem to be here. It was getting too much. She heard voices, a whispered conversation. She cracked her eyes open slightly to see Joyce and Buffy talking, she looked to her side as Dawn still slept soundly leaning towards her. She closed her eyes again and listened. She strained her ears, trying to focus as the soft whisper of voices.

"Mom! You knew?!" Buffy's voice got louder and she looked over to her younger relatives to check they were still sleeping, "What happened to oldest daughter privilege, is that a myth? You're supposed to be filling me in on the gossip" Buffy asked in mock annoyance with her mother.

"Honey, I promised Saff I wouldn't until she told you… and now she has" Joyce said, staring up at the ceiling instead of looking at Buffy.

"How can you be okay with this! You hated it when me and Angel… he's a monster" Buffy hissed, standing up to be in Joyce's line of vision. She was going easy on her, it could have turned to a full-blown argument but what with Joyce being so fragile, Buffy didn't blow up completely.

"Angel?" Joyce asked, confused and looking to her oldest daughter.

"No, Spike!" Buffy said, as if it was obvious.

"She's happy, Buffy" Joyce said, patting Buffy's shoulder softly.

"He's killed people" Buffy snapped back, but didn't move from her mother's grip. She reached to lay her hand on top of Joyce's.

"You've killed vampires and various… zombies before" Joyce reminded her.

"I slay, there's a difference" Buffy reminded her, she turned from her mom and started to pack up some of Joyce's things.

"I bet to them it's killing" Joyce shrugged. Maybe it was the meds but she was suddenly very relaxed about killing. Saff knew it was a hard thing to get over, she'd been there. But she knew, like Joyce, that Spike was different. He had good in him. He was unconventional, sure, but if she was this all-powerful good then how was it so unbelievable that he could be as well?

"I'm just worried about her" Buffy shrugged, "How do I know he won't hurt her?" Buffy asked, sighing and sitting on the edge of Joyce's bed. She had Joyce's hairbrush in her hand, twirling it around as she thought about what was going on. More stress was all Buffy needed.

"Call it Mom-intuition. I just know" Joyce shrugged, "Either way, our Saff is stubborn. Just like her father. We're talking Ox-stubborn" She laughed and Buffy smiled at the thought of her late uncle.

"I'm going to take that one as a compliment, J" Saffron said, sitting herself up and yawning. She'd heard enough.

"Sorry, honey" Joyce smiled, rubbing her head slightly and wincing as she started to get up out of her hospital bed.

"You're off the hook, special privileges for the… not-so-bed-bound. Are we leaving?" Saff asked. She must have missed something during her nap.

"Yeah the doctor has let us take Mom home, just until the op"

"Sweet!" Saff smiled the most genuine smile she had in ages, "It's a new Dawn, it's a new day! Get up Dawn! Mum's coming home for a bit" She called to her cousin, "Uh, I meant J" She smiled.

"Saff, that's old news, they decided that last night" Dawn said sleepily, stretching but going to sleep on her other side.

"Dawn, it might well be today's chip paper, but I do mean now. We're leaving. This second. Get up!" She said loudly as the two awake Summers women smiled at the exchange. It was usually the other way around, everyone trying to wake Saffron up in the mornings without success.

When Dawn eventually got up, they all walked to reception. Buffy supported Joyce as Saff carried the overnight bags and various care packages that had been provided by an enthusiastic Willow over her short stay. The doctor started to sort out the paper work as Joyce started to become more and more confused. Saff could feel it, it was making her dizzy. She had to drop the bags and steady herself on the counter.

"Well, we're all done here, why don't you take your girls home now" The doctor smiled, passing Buffy the meds she needed and a list of instructions.

"Yes, my girls. Buffy and Saffron" Joyce smiled widely.

"…And Dawn" Saff added, pulling a confused face to Buffy. Buffy didn't seem to be paying attention. Or Saff was being ignored. Saff picked up the bags and linked her arm with Dawn, trying to soothe the poor girl and whispering that it's just the head trauma.

"That makes three" Joyce said and Saffron nodded along as they trailed behind the women on their way out of the hospital. As they left, a man barged past Buffy muttering to himself. He turned when he saw Dawn walking with Saff.

"What is that thing? There's no data. There's no pictures on this one there! What is the data? There's no one in there" He shouted, confused. Joyce and Buffy turned to look at what was going on, "There's no one in there" the man shouted as Dawn cowered. Her mind was spinning as Saff ushered her away with the help of the others.

xoxoxo

There was a knock at the door. It snapped Saffron out of her daydream about what she had seen, dropping her makeup brush she rushed to the door. Spike, she thought happily as she descended the stairs quickly before anyone else could answer. She swung the door open to reveal her boyfriend, slightly bruised which meant he must have fought some demon on the way there. His chiselled cheekbones cast a shadow on his cheek and his pale blue eyes scanned her face and tried to covertly examined her body before meeting her eyes, knowing he hadn't been as subtle as he thought. A slight frown was on her face as her hand reached to touch the spot that had been powdered with a purple and green hue on the side of his face. Even the light touch was enough to make him wince slightly so she pulled back, her concern evident as her brows furrowed deeper. He saw her face and put a hand through his slicked back hair, revealing his freshly painted black nails and the silver rings on his index finger and thumb glinted in the crescent moonlight. She noticed he was holding something in his other hand and any semblance of worry was wiped from her face as she saw what it was.

"You ready, love?" He gestured to leave.

"Why? Do I not look it" She pouted, pretending to reconsider her outfit choice.

"No, you look- well, you know you're bloody-" Spike tripped over his words, which made Saffron smile. Only since they had been together had she noticed this side of him. He handed her a slightly wilted bunch of flowers and looked at his feet as she took them from him. She beamed and smelled the pink flowers.

"Why thank you" She laughed, thanking him for his sort-of compliment and the flowers. She posed as Spike tripped over his words, "You wanna come in?" She added before she turned to go down the stairs to her room. Spike smirked and followed her down. When they reached the bottom of the stairs, he pressed a soft kiss to her lips and pulled her into a close embrace. She leaned against his chest and closed her eyes, sighing quietly wishing she could stay in his arms all night. Her worry for her auntie and recent isolation from some of the others was taking its toll and she nestled closer to him. She had to admit she was looking forward to something for the first time in a while. Spike was taking her out. She moved from his arms and started to find everything she needed to take with them.

He took a cigarette out of the packet she had on her tabletop and started to light up while she rushed around her room collecting things she needed to take in her bag. Lip gloss? Check. Purse? Yep. Stake? Better take two. She turned to look at him as she smelt the familiar smell of smoke. She grabbed it out of his hand and stubbed it out as Spike sulked at her.

"Babe, not in the house! J would absolutely chop me up and fry me into one of her famous omelettes if she found out"

"Then let's buggering go, honeysuckle! Dying for a fag here" Spike said dramatically gesturing towards the door.

"You're already bloody dead" She shouted over her shoulder as she fastened her combat boots, "Stop the smirking, I know you said that on purpose" She said after a pause, during which Spike had been smirking at her response. They eventually managed to leave the house, after Saffron checked on Joyce several times.

When they arrived at the Bronze it was early in the evening and not many people were around. Spike led Saffron to a booth in the corner, to give them some privacy. Spike would be happy just spending time with her in the crypt, but he knew she needed this after everything that had gone on recently. The band was setting up and Saffron could feel their stage fright and tried her best to ignore it. Spike could tell her mood had shifted and he grabbed her hand and held it. He knew it was something that gave her comfort. Spike stayed with her for a while, before explaining he was going to get them some drinks. While he was waiting to be served at the bar, Saffron thought back to the shower she had before Spike had come over. She couldn't shake the feeling that something big was coming, and she hoped it had nothing to do with the Corrupted, she was definitely not ready for him to call in for a cup of tea.

The door to the bathroom had been locked when she had gotten out, just as she had left it. The window was closed too, she double checked. And yet, there it was. It had been written on the condensation on the mirror. The number three. She had blinked several times, the possibility of her hallucinating it due to stress had crossed her mind. But there it was. The number was drawn the full size of the mirror that had steamed up. She stood, dripping wet and staring at the number until she started to shiver. She wrapped herself in a pink towel, not taking her eyes off the mirror. She shrugged, telling herself she wasn't bothered and wiped the number away with her hand and left the bathroom. But her mind hadn't stopped going back to the chill she felt when she had seen someone had written it on her mirror.

"What is it, love? Joyce?" Spike asked, interrupting her thoughts. He threw himself into the chair opposite her, setting down the matching glasses on the table of the corner booth.

"Yeah, I know she's allowed home and all for now, but something's not right" She said, grimacing at the glass Spike set in front of her, but she still reached for it.

"We don't have to be here if you'd rather be with her and the nibblet" He left Buffy's name unsaid, neither of them knew where she was with her relationship with her cousin at the moment.

"We haven't had a date in… ever! You wanna cut it short already?!" She said lightly, although her expression stayed in a slight frown as she stared into the amber liquid in her glass. Spike had ordered them both scotch again, he said he was trying to educate her palette but it made her feel like she was an angsty detective in a crime series. The amount she had been smoking since Joyce had been in hospital made her smell like an ashtray too which only added to the effect.

"Only if it would help you quit frowning, did your mother never tell you that when the wind changes you'll stick like that?" Spike said, running a hand up her arm from across the table. His touch was gentle and reassuring and she closed her eyes as she felt his touch.

"And you'd have to love me no matter what… unless you're just with me for my beauty and grace" She joked, but only a half-smile was on her face as she nursed her drink. He snorted at her having grace, it wasn't a word he would use to describe her. Her eyes were still closed and Spike rubbed his hand over hers slightly to show that he was still with her. By her side.

"Mm, didn't I tell you that's exactly why I'm with you?" His eyes sparkled and she knew he didn't mean it. She could feel the love from his touch and hearing his voice put her in a slightly better mood. It soothed her. She looked into his eyes through her eyelashes but she still couldn't shake the worry in the back of her mind. She looked back to her drink and braced herself as she brought the glass to her lips, shocking even Spike when she threw her head back and downed every drop of the straight liquor he had ordered for her. Not one to be beaten, Spike quickly matched her and did the same, which made Saff snigger slightly as she reminded him that, "Not everything's a competition!" He just stood up from the booth, a light smile tugging at his lips as he walked towards the side she was sat on.

"I can tell you want to go back, Honeysuckle… come on, I'll walk you" He offered his hand to her to help her up.

They walked slowly through the crisp night, both of them sneaking glances at the other when they thought the other wasn't looking. Spike grasped her hand firmly in his as they walked through the streets. Partly to comfort her and partly to show everyone that passed them that they were together. He got a kick out of showing her off, even in a subtle way.

xoxoxo

Buffy had left to go out, she had been looking after her Mom all day and when Saffron had returned, she took over. Saffron was relieved when she came back to find that Dawn was in and Joyce was still conscious in her bedroom. Buffy had barely spoken to Saffron before she had left, but Saffron could feel that Buffy was feeling exhausted with worry. She hoped she felt better after spending time away from the house without having all of the responsibility landing on her. Dawn had shut herself in her room and Saffron had convinced her to keep her company, making out that the younger brunette would be doing her a favour by spending time with her. Mostly, Saffron was worried about the girl and wanted to make sure she was okay.

Spike was looking through the large bookcase in Saffron's room. He had enjoyed snooping through her room at Revello Drive and often did at any opportunity he was left alone. He turned to Saffron and Dawn as they descended the stairs. Dawn smiled when she noticed that Spike was in the basement too.

"Is this- did you get this bloody signed?" Spike couldn't hide his jealousy as he brandished a well-thumbed copy of Bram Stoker's Dracula and stared at Saffron. She looked away, tinged pink, she had hoped he wouldn't find out about that. Bloody Drac.

"Come on, who wouldn't?" She eventually said, taking the book off him and kissing him quickly on the lips to distract him. Dawn made a choking noise as if she was disgusted by their kissing and Saffron whipped her head around and smiled cheekily as she put the book back in the bookcase. "Music anyone?" Saff quickly asked as Joyce could be heard shouting to herself again. The scared look on Dawn's face suggested that she needed to put some music on. Fast. She went over to her cd player and popped in the cd that Spike had made her for her birthday the year before. Teenage Kicks by the undertones came on the player and saffron nodded her head along with the song. The good thing about her music is that it was often played loud. Dawn smiled and slowly walked to sit on the edge of Saff's bed. Saffron joined her eventually and put her arm around the girl, hoping she could feel the calmness she was sending her. Spike continued to look around the room, tapping his foot slightly to the music. Joyce started shouting louder than the music and Saffron felt herself getting scared for her auntie. She looked sideways at Dawn who was wringing her hands in her lap and Saff decided she needed to try and check on Joyce or do something. She got up to go upstairs but paused and looked between Spike and Dawn, wondering if she should leave the pair alone together.

"Go on, love, me and the bit can handle a minute without your watchful eye" Spike encouraged his girl as she nodded, trusting him, before going upstairs. Saffron decided to make Joyce some hot chocolate, the way she always had for her when she was feeling down. She set off towards the kitchen.

Whilst Saffron was busy heating up milk and finding marshmallows in the cupboard, Spike and Dawn were sat in silence on opposite ends of Saffron's bed. Spike wasn't sure what modern teenagers wanted to talk about, so he let her have control of the conversation.

"Will it always be like this?" Dawn suddenly asked, still ringing her hands. Spike turned to look at the youngest Summers, the confusion clear on his face. "With Mom being so ill and Saff and Buffy watching me like a hawk"

"Don't mind any of that. Your mum will get better, she has you girls looking after her" he shrugged, lighting up a cigarette despite Saffron telling him a million times not to smoke in the house, "And as for Saff, she cares. Don't take it for granted, bitesize, her love is precious" He said, smiling slightly. Dawn's eyes widened, she had never seen him smile like that before. They really are in love.

"You talk about her and your eyes go all gooey and melty. Love's way gross" Dawn stated, but smiled as she said it, she secretly wished she had what they had.

"You take that back! I'm bad, my eyes don't go sodding gooey!" He shouted, pointing at her with his cigarette between his fingers. Dawn just laughed but saw that his expression hadn't changed.

"Yea-yeah you're bad, but not in the same way as when we first met" Dawn levelled, remembering being young and seeing Spike sitting with her Mom in the kitchen over hot chocolates and smiling again, she had never seen him as properly evil. But she had heard the stories. Spike shook his head, feeling slightly dejected that not even the chit feared him. He was not convinced by Dawn's reassurances and instead decided to scare her, proving he was bad, with stories of his past until Saffron came back.

A crash could be heard, followed by a loud scream. Saffron. Without stopping to think, Spike ran as fast as he could up the two flights of stairs to where Saffron was. He looked at Joyce and then Saffron and pulled a confused face at Saff, he didn't understand what was wrong. Saffron had been shocked into silence. She shivered as she looked up again. Spike moved to pick up the pieces of mug up from the floor but before he could start, he had been knocked over by something he hadn't seen. A massive bug-shaped demon had dropped from the ceiling to attack Spike, it had been in Joyce's room the whole time. Spike threw it off him and started to throw wild punches at it. Dawn had come up the stairs to see what was going on and a scream that matched Saffron's interrupted the fight. Saffron ran and put her arms around her younger cousin and took her to Joyce's room for safety. The three women huddled close together to comfort each other as Spike could be heard fighting on the landing. Saffron was terrified of creepy-crawlies and shuddered as she thought about it again. It was a bug on steroids, and she couldn't bear thinking about it. The women could hear footsteps running up the stairs, they could tell it was Buffy. She started to attack the bug too and something seemed to be tumbling down the stairs before eventually silence fell over the house.

Saffron slowly started to walk down the stairs, looking around for any sign of evil bugs. She cautiously looked around the house and saw Buffy standing over Spike who had been knocked down during the fight. Saffron ran over to her vampire and started to check him over, an obvious worry on her face. He shook his head, indicating he wasn't seriously injured so she just helped him to his feet. She kissed his cheek and he ran his hand through her hair softly. he moved to cup her cheek and the concern for each other was obvious as they seemed to be having a conversation through staring into each other's eyes. They were only interrupted by someone clearing their throat loudly from the other side of the room.

"What's Spike doing here?" Buffy asked, her hands crossed over her chest. Her eyebrows were raised as the couple turned to look at her, they had seemingly forgotten that Buffy was in the room.

"I could say the same to you… what's wrong? Bronze not demon-y enough for you?" Saffron replied, trying not to show how upset she got every time Buffy started a confrontation with her. She loved her cousin, but she loved Spike too.

"I live here" She sighed, before adding "I'm being serious, Saffron"

"Buffy, I couldn't do this without him. He just protected us all" Saffron said, praising her boyfriend and he smiled proudly and puffed out his chest. She rolled her eyes at him and then looked back to Buffy.

"I protected us, he got in the way" Buffy snapped, glaring at Spike who had looked smug at Saff's words.

"Buff, I know it's hard for you to understand…" Saffron started, before she was interrupted by her cousin's anger singeing her arms and face. She winced as Buffy replied.

"What I don't understand is why he was left alone with Dawn" She hissed lowly, even though Spike could still hear her. Buffy gave her a look. He squinted in confusion, but shrugged, if it was important Saff would have told him. Saffron quickly whispered to Spike to let them have a moment and he nodded, not before landing a languid a kiss on her lips that lasted longer than it should have. He smirked at Buffy as they finally pulled away and Saff watched him leave before she answered her cousin.

"I trust him. He doesn't know but he'd protect her even more, I know it" She insisted, trying to appeal to Buffy.

"Saff, I'm worried about you" Buffy said, and Saffron knew this. But she could tell that Buffy was angry too, she just couldn't figure out why.

"Why are you angry about me and Spike?" She decided to be blunt.

"Why do you think?" Buffy replied quickly.

"I don't know… you saw him fight yourself to keep that thing away from us" Saff couldn't help shivering at the idea of the creature that had been in their home moments before.

"It's not that I'm jealous, I want you to be happy. It's just-" Buffy paused, not sure how to continue.

"What is it, Buff?"

"Apart from the obvious, that Spike is annoying and evil?" Buffy asked and Saff nodded tiredly, "Riley" She said quietly.

"The reason you're ignoring every good quality Spike has shown is because of your boyfriend? Not to sound like I'm about to mount my woman power shrine in front of the fireplace, but you can think for yourself, Buff…"

"It's not that. It's Riley and me, something's not right. You should wanna talk to your boyfriend, I should have butterflies when he's around, but every time he's around it feels like another responsibility" She revealed, looking into the distance. She missed talking to Saffron, and she couldn't help herself despite how she was feeling about her and Spike.

"Hey, if you feel something's not right you should talk to him about it. You're usually spot on when you feel like that…" She tailed off as Buffy sighed again, "Do you think you could try and get on with Spike?"

"Saff, he's a pig. The stuff he used to say to you. To all of us…" Buffy said, unable to understand what Saffron could possibly see in him. Although, when she was watching them together before they remembered she was in the room, she had to admit that they did seem to care about each other.

"I'm only asking you to try. Please?" Saffron asked again. Buffy seemed to think about it but didn't answer. Saffron sighed sadly and turned to leave, she needed to find Dawn and make sure she was okay. The poor girl had been through a lot.

xoxoxo

Buffy, Saff and Dawn had watched Joyce being wheeled off for her operation. Neither of them had any words to describe their feelings. They hugged before walking back to the waiting room, a room they were all sick of at this point. They had been waiting a long time and Saff couldn't bear to sit in that room any longer. She walked out into the cool air, the sun was setting and people and ambulances were rushing past her as she lit herself up a cigarette. She noticed a presence behind her, he seemed conflicted.

"You ok SP?" Xander asked, stopping short of offering a comforting hand on her shoulder. He remembered they hadn't been talking much. But after everything with Joyce he couldn't just ignore her.

"Do you actually want to know?" She bit back, hurt at the way he could turn his concern for her on and off.

"Yeah. You're like my kid sister, Saff. I just don't like him" He shrugged. She sighed, taking a drag from her cigarette.

"So, don't like him, but please like me…" She said quietly. Embarrassed about how needy she came across. This could go one of two ways, Xander could laugh or he could comfort her.

"I don't know if I can" He shrugged, after thinking for a moment. He wasn't sure he could trust her. That wasn't one of the options, she sighed heavily. He turned and walked back into the hospital, leaving her there to finish her cigarette. A simple sentence loaded with the worst kind of rejection she had felt. She understood his thinking, she did. But Anya must have killed plenty of people in her time, if she's allowed redemption why can't Spike?

Why was it so easy for everyone to conveniently forget Anya's past? She was wondering this as she walked back towards the waiting room. She rounded the corner and almost made it back but a strong pair of hands pulled her into an empty supply closet and locked the door behind them.

"Honeysuckle?" He breathed, there wasn't much room in there to manoeuvre as he used his finger to lift her chin to face him. Just what he had suspected, her eyes were red and puffy. Crying. "Did you hear anything?" he asked, referring to Joyce, but she just shook her head sadly. She could feel a wave of emotion coming over her again and she fought against it. She didn't want to cry again. But there it was, the sobs that wracked her body. She felt she was being crushed. Joyce was in surgery, Xander and the others didn't like her, Dawn was being targeted by an evil hell-god and she didn't have any room to breathe. The only person she could trust was Spike but leaning on him meant everyone didn't trust her. She didn't have to vocalise any of this. Spike could feel it. They had an unspoken connection. He didn't know how to comfort her, he tried patting her. This made her snort slightly and look up at him through her watering eyes, but she didn't get much chance before he tackled her in an all-encompassing hug. She immediately brought her hands up to hold his back tightly, sobs tripping her up every so often.

"It's okay, pet. Everything will be okay" He whispered, stroking her hair and leaning against her. He started humming a tune softly to distract her from her thoughts as her breathing started to calm down. It sounded pretty and old and it was helping. They stood in the tiny closet, holding on to each other for dear life as Saff tried to steady her breathing back to normal.

Why did no one else see this side of him?