The icy storm raged outside. Strong, malicious winds howled and avalanches of snow thundered and crashed on top of Starbug. Rimmer sat grumpily in one corner, his eyes firmly fixed on Lister who was sat opposite him, teeth chattering and buried deep beneath his winter coat.
They had been marooned on an uninhabitable artic wasteland of a planet for three days. And there was no sign of rescue, they hadn't even been able to establish radio contact with Red Dwarf. Perhaps Holly hadn't been able to manoeuvre the gigantic mining ship through the minefield of black holes after all. Even so, what was taking Cat and Kryten so long?
"Sounds like it's easing off," Rimmer said optimistically, breaking the heavy silence between them. Lister glanced up at him, scowling.
"Yeah, sure Rimmer. Easy for you to say, you're not the one facing almost certain, inevitable death, I am."Lister replied shakily. Rimmer shook his head patronisingly.
"Aah yes, but Listy, you're forgetting something. I'm already dead." Rimmer's expression turned as icy as the planetscape outside the 'Bug. But his heart skipped a beat as he remembered his death, how he had selfishly and so stupidly sacrificed his life and the lives of the rest of Red Dwarf's crew, in depression of the loss of the only person he had truly loved in his entire, miserable, existence.
Flashback
Rimmer sat on his bunk, idly flicking through one of Lister's old discarded magazines. It was one about Zero-Gee football, Lister's favourite sport- or so he said, and Rimmer was engrossed in an article about Jim Bexley Speed, captain of the London Jets, the team Lister supported.
Rimmer recalled Lister drunkenly telling him one weekday night how he was going to name his first two sons Jim and Bexley, after his soccer hero. A small smile twitched at the corner of Rimmer's mouth, and his eyes glazed over. He always went like this whenever he thought of Lister, and his funny little ways he found so cute, so endearing, so...attractive.
Rimmer just wanted to tell Lister he loved him.
But whenever they were alone together, Rimmer's nerves always went into overdrive, causing him to either scathingly insult or be spitefully sarcastic towards the unsuspecting object of his affections.
Rimmer sighed and heaved himself out of bed, it was entirely his fault that Lister despised him, maybe even hated him. His fault. As he pulled on his grey overalls he winced, his face a mixture of self inflicted pain and anguish, he knew there was next to zero chance of him ever being with Lister. He had a better chance at actually passing the engineer's exam.
After straightening out his creased sleeves and tieing his boot laces, Rimmer faced the mirror and did his special salute, bracing himself for another day in the company of Dave Lister and unclogging chicken soup nozzles.
Okay most of this sucks but I promise it WILL get a bit more exciting!