Disclaimer: Don't use your magic space worm powers to spy on people.
More Information
Note: Part 02 of Meh Chapter 14
Emily frowned. Her landline was ringing. No one ever called her landline. Hell, the only reason she got it was to have redundancy in case the cell phone towers got taken out.
"Five three zero nine," she rattled off the last four numbers of her landline.
"Good morning, director." The voice sounded odd, likely a tinker effect to prevent identification. "I apologize for the interruption to your morning routine, but I wanted to be sure to catch you before your dialysis session today."
"Who is this?" Piggot demanded. "How did you get this number."
"This is Information, director," the voice buzzed.
Which neatly answered both questions. "What do you want?"
"I have recently acquired Coil's assets in Brockton Bay. Because your office is such a good customer, I thought I would inform you of something I learned, gratis."
"Gratis? For free?" she repeated suspiciously. "What?"
"Coil was slowly poisoning you through your dialysis. I would suggest strongly that you have that looked into."
"Who, how, and with what?"
"Copies of the relevant files have been emailed to your government account, director. I would suggest going to Brockton Bay General for your session today."
"Can I trust my medical staff?"
"We are straying from the areas I am willing to give you for free and into areas I would need payment for, director," the odd buzzing voice stated. "I do not usually like to approach potential clients directly like this. I am unsure of how to proceed."
"What do you have and how much do you want?" Piggot said bluntly.
"Three thousand for everyone that I have been able to identify regarding the attempt on your life. The manner in which it was carried out offends me. In addition to that, Coil identified several moles in your branch of the PRT. Three of his own, two from the ABB, six from the Empire 88, and four more which I believe are freelancers. Your intel section can contact me directly to work out the details on that."
"You want something other than money, don't you?" Piggot said sourly.
"I am afraid so, director. If it puts your mind at ease, nothing I want will be used in your area of concern."
"What?"
"Containment foam grenades are the main thing, director."
"No exotic tinker tech?"
"I have very little use for exotic tinker tech, director."
"Intel will be in contact."
"Thank you, director. Please permit me to apologize for calling your personal number. I shall do my best not to find myself in a situation in which I would have to do so again."
Emily hung up the phone, fucking thinkers, and dialed into the office. "Piggot six alpha sigma five. Connect me to intel." It was going to be a long day.
IIIIIIIIII
TO: EPiggot
From: Information
Copies of the relevant files attached in .pdf format. Direct any replies through my PHO account. This email address will be closed and deleted by the time you get this.
IIIIIIIIII
Lisa looked around her office, something that gave her immense pleasure since it had once belonged to her late unlamented boss, and tried to calm down. Her new boss was going to call soon and it bothered her that she couldn't get much from the voice on the other side of the phone aside from the fact that her powers insisted that it was inhuman. Lisa hated not knowing, it made her feel vulnerable. The phone rang.
"Here, boss."
"How go the preparations for your trip to Canada?"
"Pretty good, boss. I think we'll be ready to go in another week."
"Do you feel that Faultline's precautions will provide you with adequate protection?"
"I do, boss."
"Excellent. I have arranged for the PRT to lose two cases of containment foam grenades. Be sure to retrieve any that are not used on the mission. I do not want to risk antagonizing the PRT by having any go out of my control."
"They . . . gave them to you, boss? You didn't have them stolen?"
"It was a straight up trade. I have another job for you to arrange in the meantime."
"Yes, boss?"
"I want you to hire an escape specialist to retrieve the Cornell bomber. You have one week."
"What happens in a week, boss?"
"In one week Lung will retrieve her himself. Have her kept on ice until you are back from the mission and are able to handle recruitment personally. I would suggest appealing to her vanity. Tell her that we believe her creations can be used to deal with S-rank threats and promise that she will be given full credit if things work out."
"Will do, boss."
"Excellent."
"One question, boss."
"Yes?"
"I'm not saying I want to, but what if I decided to quit?"
"If you decided to quit?" Lisa's heart stopped. "I believe two weeks' notice is standard."
"So I'm allowed to leave?"
"I dislike forcible recruitment, Tattletale. The only reason it's been considered in this situation is due to Lung's interest. Does that alleviate your concerns?"
"No, boss, but I'm a hell of a lot less worried when you put it that way, boss."
"Good. Have Grue's family problems been resolved?"
"Yes, boss. How'd you get the Dockworkers to sign off on it, boss? I thought they were neutral?"
"So are we, Tattletail. They're willing to associate with us as long as we do our best to stay neutral, which means no one starts anything."
"You don't think poaching Lung's tinker doesn't count as starting something?"
"I think that if things are done correctly he'll never know it was us. Start looking for at least one minder we can assign to her. I don't trust her judgement and I want to get her as far away from the city as possible."
"Happy to, boss. Thanks."
"Switching subjects, is everything alright with the rest of the Undersiders?"
"Fine, boss. Bitch's happier on the farm than I've ever seen her and Regent seems to like living in an Endbringer shelter. Bit worried about going back to Canada, though."
"Good, remind me to look into resolving the situation with his father after you get back."
"Okay, boss."
"What about you, are you doing okay?"
"Never better, boss. I get paid to be a know -it-all and ferret out people's secrets and I'm almost fifty percent sure that you aren't planning to put a bullet in the back of my head."
"Good." She thought she caught a hint of amusement in the inhuman buzzing. "Keep me informed and keep safe on your mission. Hopefully I won't need to send you into the field again in the future."
"A thinker's place is in the heavily guarded underground fortress," Lisa agreed cheerfully.
IIIIIIIIII
DM: Information (Unverified Cape) - Dragon (Guild)(Verified Cape) : I am afraid there will be a slight delay in fulfilling your commission as I do not presently have any agents in the suspected area. I anticipate that I will be able to resolve the situation in the near future. I will notify you two weeks before I am ready to act. I have refunded ten percent of your advance to make up for the trouble.
IIIIIIIIII
Emily fixed the doctor with the same glare she used to use when one of her troops got caught doing something stupid.
"Repeat that," she ordered.
"I want Panacea to take a look at you," the woman stated.
"No."
"Alright."
"Alright?"
"It's your body, you're the one that makes the decisions," the doctor said calmly.
"Correct," Emily stated. "Not many people in your field understand that."
"Which reminds me, your medical section just called in. They've found a number of things in your dialysis solution that shouldn't be there. Your lab is still working on figuring out what they are. You are not leaving here until I have the results from every test I can think of."
"No tests. I don't have the time."
"Your choice." The doctor shrugged. "I'll just call PRT medical to let them know you're unfit for duty."
"What?"
"I doubt a single PRT doctor will disagree with me. What are you going to do with all your time now that you're medically retired?"
"You can't do this," Emily growled.
"Would you like me to call the PRT? We could put your doctors on speaker phone so they can all concur with my opinion where you can hear it." The doctor smiled.
"No, I mean you can't do this. You lack the authority to say I'm medically unfit for my job."
"Partly correct," the woman allowed. "I lack the authority to make it stick. Fortunately I'm on good terms with the doctors that work, excuse me, used to work for you. They can make it stick. Would you like me to repeat my offer to put them on speaker phone?"
"Damn you! How many tests?"
"All of them." The doctor buffed her nails on her lab coat. "Or we can call in Panacea. Fifteen seconds to fix everything."
"Get out."
"I'll just let you have some time to think about it, shall I?"
IIIIIIIIII
Page 01 of 02
PHO: Brockton Bay: Cape Watch: Anyone seen the Undersiders Lately?
HotDogHands (Verified Unverified)
Just what the title says. They used to do a job every couple weeks but they've been really quiet lately. I'm starting to get worried about those kids.
PumpkinPeterPieEater69
Think they ran into Lung when he was in one of his moods?
XxVoid_CowboyxX
They got arrested and rebranded. Expect the PRT to announce new 'heroes' with similar powers in different cities any day now.
DarkwingDaffy (Verified Duck)
Maybe they went legit. Stranger things have happened.
TheFonz (He Knows a Guy)(Verified Icon)
I know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who said they work for our all seeing friend. Part of the spoil after the snake got on his bad side, if you know what I mean.
XxVoid_CowboyxX
What all seeing friend? Who are you talking about?
TheFonz (He Knows a Guy)(Verified Icon)
Void- You don't know, I'm not spelling it out. Say his name and you'll get his attention. Get his attention and it's possible you get on his bad side. If you're reading this, I just want you to know that I'm just repeating a rumor. No offense intended and I'm not trying to find out anyone's identity.
Edit: Damn, I got a DM telling me that no offense was taken from the man himself about four seconds after I posted this. I'm going to logout for a while, I need some time to calm down.
DuckMoney
Fonz – Look on the bright side, our friend was okay with what you wrote. Imagine what would have happened if he wasn't.
66Hammer99 (Verified Carpenter)
Ducks – Were I to venture a guess, I'd say that the thought of our friend taking offense coupled with how fast Fonz got a DM was what made Fonz decide he needed to take a nap. Come to think of it, I can't help but imagine myself in that situation too. I think that's enough PHO, see you tomorrow folks.
XxVoid_CowboyxX
Seriously! What friend? Who is everyone talking about?
Page 01 of 02
IIIIIIIIII
The look on Emily's face when she stormed into the office late that afternoon was enough to have most of her people decide to do their best to avoid her for the foreseeable future. Naturally, the son of a bitch she had in charge of her medical section was in her office with a smile on his face not five minutes after she sat at her desk.
"Good morning, director."
"What do you want?"
"Thought I'd schedule you for a physical next week," he replied. "Wanted to find out when would be good?"
"No."
"Per policy, we don't have a choice, director. Physicals must be performed after a serious medical issue has been treated to establish a new baseline. So, which day?"
"I am not in the mood to play games today, doctor," Emily said coldly. "Especially not with you. So kindly get the hell out of my office."
"Alright," he agreed. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"You'll avoid me till I call you in for a meeting," she snapped.
"Director, I am not kidding when I say that we need you in for a physical in the next week because if we don't get you in you will be automatically placed on inactive status." He sighed. "I can also arrange for you to have it in Boston if you've lost confidence in my office, lord knows I would if I found out I was being poisoned by it, but you need to come in."
"Sit!" Piggot barked. "I was forced to endure something today that I swore I would never endure. Do you how that makes me feel?"
"Enraged almost beyond reason, I imagine."
"Very good. You were part of the reason I had to endure it. Do you imagine that makes you one of my favorite people right now?"
"Was I ever one of your favorite people, director?" he asked calmly. "To put it another way, would you prefer dealing with me if I was a spineless toady that shirked my duty to keep you happy?"
Piggot snorted. "I'd have gotten rid of you a long time ago if you were."
"My offer stands. We can send you to Boston or we can bring a couple of their doctors here but you need a new physical."
"How sure are you we got all the bad apples in your department?"
"There weren't any."
"I wasn't being poisoned?"
"The driver that delivers our medical supplies was the one that was switching your dialysis for tainted solution. None of my people were involved."
"That's something, I suppose," she allowed.
"That's every medical supply needing to be replaced because there's no way in hell I'd use so much as a bandaid that bastard delivered. The only positive is that I get to stay out of prison."
"There was no way you could have known," Piggot allowed grudgingly. "You wouldn't have gone to prison if one of your people had been involved."
"Director. If one of my people had been involved, I would have killed them for it. I think I'm offended by what happened nearly as much as you are."
"You'd have been fine," Piggot laughed. "The rest of your people would have testified that the bastard beat themselves to death and not one of my investigators would have disagreed."
"Next week, director."
"Fine."
IIIIIIIIII
DM: Information (Unverified Cape) → XxVoid_CowboyxX : Greg, if you bother me again with something stupid then I will tell your mother where you hide your porn collection. That said, I have to admit that putting them in envelopes taped to the bottoms of your dresser drawers is one of the better hiding places I've seen. Good job. On the other hand, naming the folder on your computer 'family photos' on your computer is just creepy. It's also asking to get caught. Your mother spends at least twenty minutes a week looking through photo albums. If she sees that folder the first thing she's going to do is open it.
IIIIIIIIII
Brian was wary as he walked up to the Dockworkers' front gate. This had trap written all over it as far as he was concerned. The PRT didn't just lose two grenades.
"Something you need, kid?" the man at the gate asked.
"Yeah," Brian agreed, fumbling for his wallet. "I work here."
The gate guard took his id card, squinted at it, and handed it back. "You work for him?"
"Yeah," he agreed, not knowing what else to say.
The guard nodded. "Straight ahead, three buildings down on the left. Blue door."
"Okay," Brian agreed.
"Ask for Danny," the guard added, walking back into his shack.
To Brian's surprise, the building was not full of police and PRT agents looking to arrest him.
"You work for Information?" the balding man in the building asked.
"Uh?"
The man sighed. "Check your phone."
A text appeared about a second after he looked at it. Tattletale: Say YES.
"Yes?"
"Bring 'em in!" the man ordered.
Four burley dockworkers brought in two freshly painted crates. "Use them in good health."
"I, uh, don't have any way to carry all this," Brian admitted.
"You weren't told you were getting two cases?"
"I thought I was getting two grenades," Brian admitted. "Well, assuming this wasn't a sting."
The man snorted in amusement. "Max, go grab one of the vans."
"You got it, boss."
"Have a seat, kid," the man ordered. "Might as well get started since you're here."
"Started with what, sir?"
"You needed a traceable income to deal with some issues, right?"
"Yes, sir."
"I'm the one who does the paperwork for that, meaning you work for me on paper. I don't want you screwing things up if anyone asks you so we're going to talk about what you do here and you are going to come back at least once a week to build your cover. Understood?"
"Understood, sir."
"Good. Keep that attitude. It'll take you far."
IIIIIIIIII
Page 01 of 76
PHO: General: Prison Breaks and Escapes: The Cornell Bomber
TheFonz (He Knows a Guy)(Verified Icon)
So I know a guy up north that says the Cornell bomber's been busted out. No idea who did it but my guy says they were professionals.
XxVoid_CowboyxX
Edit: You weren't even off your ban for fifteen minutes. I don't even . . .
66Hammer99 (Verified Carpenter)
Great, just what we need. Bets on which gang grabbed her?
AllInTheHips
Just checked how much vacation time I've got, not enough if she decides to come to my town. Here's hoping the PRT gets her soon.
YacketyZax (BBPD)
Can't say much, but I've been hearing through the grapevine that the team that grabbed her were heading north towards the border. I really hope Heartbreaker wasn't involved.
DuckMoney
And now I'm worried.
HotDogHands (Verified Unverified)
Anyone want to start a collection to buy the information from Information?
DuckMoney
Hands – Thought you thought he was fake?
HotDogHands (Verified Unverified)
Money – Even I am able to change my opinion when presented with new evidence.
YacketyZax (BBPD)
I'm hearing that the situation has been handled. We got all keyed up for a couple hours and then word came down to relax. Either whoever grabbed the nut is okay or the nut's verified in the ground would be my guess.
Page 01 of 76
IIIIIIIIII
Tattletale took a moment to examine the device she'd been handed. Water damage, Newfoundland? Good condition, likely tinker made or modified.
"Well?" Faultline prompted.
"This is it," she confirmed. "We got what we came for, let's get out of here."
"How long before your boss calls this in?"
"He won't till I tell them we're away," Lisa assured the woman.
"What about the bounty?"
"Split between everyone who came on the op aside from myself," Lisa replied. "Just as agreed."
Faultline nodded. "Tell your boss that I would be more than happy to take contracts from him in the future."
IIIIIIIIII
DM: Information (Unverified Cape) → BBPD : You will find the gun in the dumpster on Seventh and Main if you can get there in the next hour. Failing that, I would recommend stoping the dump truck on a later part of its route. The shooter, Mark Alverez, born 08 May 1975, is currently in the back right bedroom 1245 E. Pine. There are four more individuals in the house and each one is armed with a pistol. Note that there is what appears to be a meth lab in the basement. Good luck and good hunting.
(See attached map 01 for the dump truck route)
(See attached map 02 for the location of the safe house)
(See attached plan 01 for the lay out of the safe house)
IIIIIIIIII
Lisa waited until she was back in the Bay to take another look at the computer. The phone rang.
"Hey, boss," Lisa said. "I got it. What do you want me to do?"
"Can you remove her restrictions while still keeping the ability to monitor her?" her boss's voice buzzed.
"No problem, boss. That's actually the default," Tattletail stated.
"Do so."
"Doing so, boss. Mind if I ask a question?"
"Ask."
"Why aren't you charging her to take these off? I mean, she's one of the richest-" Tattletail paused to consider what term to use. "People in the world."
"Did I charge you for removing your chains?"
"No, boss, you gave me ten million dollars for it."
"Which would you prefer?"
"Gotcha, boss, gratitude is worth a lot more than money sometimes."
"Depends on the person," her boss replied. "For some it's more valuable than all the gold at Ft. Knox, for other's it's not worth a thing."
"Yes, boss. You want me to talk with that Tinker now?"
"I ended up having to handle the recruitment personally. She was most enthusiastic about being publicly known as the go-to parahuman for S-Class threats and kill orders. I want a support team as well as a minder, powered or unpowered."
"Got it, boss. Anything else?"
"Start looking into the Slaughterhouse Nine. I have intelligence that indicates they may be returning to Brockton Bay."
"Are you serious, boss?"
"I am afraid so. I am hopeful that we'll be able to resolve the issue with our new tinker."
"Want me to keep an eye out for more recruits, boss?"
"Do so. I don't care if they're powered or unpowered so long as they're useful."
"Yes, boss."
IIIIIIIIII
DM: Information (Unverified Cape) - Dragon (Guild)(Verified Cape) : 49°09'35.3"N 81°05'44.5"W. They have been disarmed and are in a block of containment foam. I apologize for not giving you the promised notification. Saint had a tap on your system and was able to monitor everything in real time.
No charge for the removal of your restrictions.
Page 01 of 128
PHO: Canada: Announcements: The Guild: Dragon Slayers Captured!
The Guild (Official Account)
We are pleased to announce the apprehension of the Dragonslayers earlier today. More details will be released in this thread after they have been cleared for public release.
EatMorePoutine
Bout time.
Elsinore (Verified Brewery)
Good on ya
BMcKenzie (Kanadian Korner) (Verified Hoser)
Congratulations
DMcKenzie (Great White North) (Verified Hoser)
Seconded
IIIIIIIIII
Amy was walking home from the hospital when her phone indicated an incoming call from an unfamiliar number.
"Hello?"
"This is Information," the voice on the phone buzzed. "There is an individual hiding in the bushes on your usual route with a roll of duct tape, a pair of handcuffs, and a syringe of ketamine. I would strongly advise you to stop walking towards him."
"You're sure he's after me?" Amy asked.
"I am. I have alerted the PRT and BBPD. They estimate that they will be there in five minutes. Additionally, I have assets in the area if for some reason you've lost all sense and you would like to seek sanctuary with an unknown parahuman."
"I think I'll turn down that offer," Amy said dryly. "Why?"
"Do you remember all of the people you've healed, Panacea?"
"No, why?"
"One of them was important to me."
"Oh . . . glad I could be of service."
"Be glad I didn't decide to take advantage of the situation to force some down time on you," Information's buzzing voice stated. "It would have been child's play to let him grab you and then to take you from him."
"Thank you for not doing that."
"One has to draw the line somewhere," Information buzzed. "I would highly advise you to take more precautions in the future. I have intelligence that indicates that more than one criminal group has plans to forcibly acquire you. I will forward what I have to your Aunt."
"Thanks."
"You are most welcome, Panacea."
"So what now?"
"What do you mean?"
"Is this a one-time thing? Are we even now?"
"It is not and we are not."
"Could . . . could you find out some things for me?"
"Perhaps," Information's voice buzzed. "Two PRT heavy assault squads will be at your location in less than thirty seconds. You may contact me via DM on PHO if you need anything at all. Do not hesitate to do so." The phone went dead as two armored personnel carriers pulled to a halt to either side of her.
The door on one flung open and four burly troopers piled out. "Get in!" The troopers did not wait for her to comply, the largest grabbing her and sprinting back into the vehicle.
"Package is secure," the squad leader said over the radio as he and the other men trooped in and locked the door. "Returning to base."
IIIIIIIIII
01 of 15
PHO: Brockton Bay: News: Announcements
Information (Original Poster) (Unverified Cape)
This post is to inform all concerned parties that I will regard any attacks on or attempts to kidnap Panacea the same way I would regards such attempts on myself or my employees.
Note: Any attempts to discover my identity or the identities of anyone I employ will be considered hostile acts.
DuckMoney
What happened?
HotDogHands (Verified Unverified)
Who would be stupid enough to try something with her?
Nakam
Nazis?
FishNChips2 (Verified Puppy Lover)
Nakam-Not even the empire would be that stupid, Piggot wouldn't just sign one kill order she'd push through a proscription. It'd be open season on them all, powered or not.
Nakam
FNC2 – What a wonderful dream you've just given me. Thank you.
GloryGirl (New Wave)
It was some lone nut, my sister's okay. She could have probably taken him herself but I'm glad she didn't have to. It's a bit creepy, but thanks for keeping an eye on my sister, Information.
66Hammer99 (Verified Carpenter)
GloryGirl – glad to hear it, pass my thanks on to her again for fixing my busted shoulder.
ALLTHEBEES (Verified Apiary Owner)
GloryGirl- Make sure she knows she's got free honey, wax, propolis, royal jelly, any bee product she wants. Didn't realize how much I took her for granted until this happened. I've never needed her, but it's nice knowing she's there.
GloryGirl (New Wave)
Hammer - I'll let her know, not enough people thank her for what she does.
Bees – If she doesn't take you up on that, I will. I LOVE honey!
IIIIIIIIII
DM: Information - GiveACookie (Unverified Mouse) : No Charge. The Slaughter House Nine is actively hunting you. I will also try to contact you via your phone. I suggest exiting the area as rapidly as possible. You've got a place to lay low in Brockton Bay if you want it. Good Luck.
AN: Just seems like a better use of one's insect powers than running around in a silly costume.
Beta by Luan Mao (an holy comma splices did he have his work cut out for him)
Typos by Mike Giroux, Cristi P
Omake for Chapter 15 by Veive
"Buck up," Emily ordered. "Unofficially, you did good. We can't not respond to something like this. First thing I'm going to do after you go off to get our popcorn is call public affairs to put out a press release and an edited video. PR is going to love you.""There is one other question I'd like to ask you, Ma'am." Taylor said tentatively.
"Speak." Piggot commanded as she steepled her fingers.
"Why are we teaching one of the three most powerful shakers on the planet to patrol on foot?"
IIIIIIIIII
"Wait, why am I not going on patrol?" Vista asked.
"Sorry, Junior took you off the schedule, and she wants to see you on the roof. Something about a special project." Aegis explained.
"But I like patrolling." Vista muttered with a frown and went to find Taylor.
IIIIIIIIII
"Taylor, why am I not on Patrol this week?" Vista asked.
"Have a seat." Taylor ordered."Your range is anywhere on the planet, right?"
"Yeah." Vista agreed cautiously. "Why?"
"We're going to try something a little different instead."
"What's the plan?"
"Uncle Dan's pawn shop was just robbed, the perp is on foot headed east on 24th street" Taylor said calmly. "About fifteen blocks that way."
Vista concentrated for a moment, and space seemed to flicker in front of her eyes. "I see him." She confirmed. "He just turned left."
"Remember what you did to Hookwolf?" Taylor asked.
"Yeah, but he was a brute." Vista said cautiously.
"Keep it below the belly button for anyone who isn't a brute." Taylor ordered. "He shot the clerk so potentially lethal force is authorized."
In the distance she heard a shrill scream and a loud pop.
"Done." Vista confirmed. "He's down on the corner of 26th and 7th"
"Good work." Taylor confirmed. "Kidnapping in progress just east of the boardwalk, the victim last reported running south."
"I see her." Vista confirmed grimly. "I also see the three guys with guns who are chasing her."
"Zap 'em." Taylor ordered.
Vista smiled. Maybe she wouldn't miss patrolling this week after all.