A/N: Thank you sm for the recent guests for commenting ! I love hearing your thoughts and I'm sorry, but hopefully you'll stick with the story! There's plenty more to come xoxo

Chapter 60:

"When I found out I was a half of something, it reminded me that I had never been one to do anything half measures. There are certain things that you have to do for yourself… right Spikey? If you want a job doing and all that... And here I am, doing the most with my newfound gift. There wasn't enough monster in my man, so I had to take on the role myself. I want to taste the fear, the chaos… I just want to watch the world burn. I mean, can you blame a girl?

Blood and ash and torment, that's but a morsel to me. I want Oleander to bring the world to it's knees, so that I can finally break out of this sappy little shell and become who I was meant to be. He's right, Oleander, he understands… we feel the truth. We feel hate and the horror and the evil. And now, I love it. I feel it with every fibre of my being. I want to taste more, I want to have everyone feel it. So, that's what I'll do. As soon as I get out of here, the world will be on a quick march to its death… stop the doting boyfriend act… join me?"

She spoke in a voice that sounded too cold to be hers. She sensed the way that he felt when she asked him to join her. Spike had been sat in the basement of Angel's hotel, watching over her since they had managed to bring her in. Saff felt the cold steel around her wrists, high above her head. Shackled. How cliché. She opened her eyes and smiled, that knowing smile he hadn't seen since he first came to Sunnydale, "And lo the sacrificial lamb, a shaking and shivering wreck, that never understood her place until this moment. To live and love or die and rule this cruel, ugly land? I think you know my choice"

"Honey, this isn't right. It's a spell or something… th-this isn't you" Spike had been dumbfounded since she had woken up, this was his girl. Her skin, her eyes, even down to the freckle on her left earlobe that looked like a second piercing. But something shifted. It was... like how she had been on Halloween. He had taken great delight in the way she acted toward him then, but now… everything was different. He missed her all over again.

"Oh, but it is…" she smirked, her eyes boring into his. There was a long pause at this as he looked her over. The corset, red vinyl skirt. She had gone all out on the vampy makeup despite it all coming off on account of the dried blood still spattered around her face, despite him having left her bare-faced and in her snowman pyjamas.

"Where did you bloody get the outfit?"

"Do you like it? It makes me feel more… me" She smiled, looking down at her outfit approvingly. She moved suddenly, trying to break the chains around her wrist. She expected them to snap, what with the vampire and extra strength she already had. No luck. She frowned, trying again. Fuck.

"Angel's not stupid, love. Well, he is. But he wasn't going to give you shackles you could slip out of so easily"

"The eternity you suffer would only be worse without me, can you feel it? The longing to be something more? Something… good?" She asked, moving on and toying with him. A glint in her eye at the flash of disappointment on his face, "How predictable, the man becomes a hero for his woman and they skip into the sunset. Do you think that's real? Poor little Spike"

"Will you stop yammering on? Giving me a bloody headache with all your badly thought out evil speeches. You can tell you're new to this" He snapped at her, but she could feel what she had said got to him.

"I can do better. Give me a moment, I'm distracted by the gnawing hunger only a fresh kill could quench"

"You had enough blood for the next millennium"

"Oh, I don't actually need to feed on their flesh, I just enjoy it. I enjoy their last breath being at my hands, the way the light in their eyes fades. I feel all their hopes, their dreams. And I relish it. I relish their loss, because it is only theirs. To me it is a sweet dessert, their pain heightens my enjoyment" She smirked as she ended her sentence. His face could only be described as in shock. He was, for once in his unlife, speechless. They let her words marinate as they sat staring at each other. Saffron smiling to herself.

"Honeysuckle, this isn't you" He repeated himself finally.

"But it is, Spikey. Do you not feel the soul in my body? It's there and yet, here I am"

"Love, it's a spell or a bloody hex or something" He continued. But she didn't care for the conversation anymore, so she directed it the way she wanted it.

"Imagine what we could be together, without my pesky conscience" She said with conviction, "We could track down an initiative doctor. I could… influence him to perform you a little surgery" the glint in her eye was chilling. He moved closer still, his interest showing. She smirked knowingly as she felt it, "All you have to do is release me and we'll be free. We both will" He leaned in, she could feel he was considering it. He moved closer as if to unlock her, his eyes lingering on hers, before whispering, "No" She rolled her eyes.

"Call yourself a monster?" She hissed, fixing him a cold glare. One that told him she had him completely figured out.

"No, a man"

"She was being kind you know! That's not how she sees you! You are merely a neutered-" He left as she shouted after him, slamming the door on her. She chuckled as she heard him slam the door. His footsteps stormed over to the rest of them who were waiting upstairs. She listened to their conversation, her entertainment for the evening thanks to her vampire hearing.

"It's not her" Spike said firmly, balling his fists in anger, punching some drywall as Angel rolled his eyes.

"Well, contrary to your belief it is Saffron" Wesley said unhelpfully, researching anything that could help them.

"It's not my fucking Saffron!" He shouted, kicking one of the chairs, "Can't you do something? Magic her back with the pentagram and the fairy dust?" he said gesturing behind them as if to tell them all to start casting spells. He was getting desperate, it reminded him all too much of another woman he loved that had changed and twisted once she had become a vampire. He couldn't stomach the same happening to Saff. He loved her, he wanted who she was back. They fit so well together… she couldn't be reduced to this.

"Spike, we're trying to find out what it is. She's safe for now" Angel said, his face hard to read. Especially considering he only had one facial expression anyway.

"I'm afraid it might well be your Saffron. How long has she been losing time and blacking out?" Wesley repeated annoyed that they seemed to be going in circles instead of finding out what it was, "Could you not smell the blood on her?" He asked, raising his eyebrows and waiting for Spike to answer.

"Blood?"

"Yes, I saw her running to the bathroom the other morning, I believed it to be a nose-bleed but I should have known. There was too much blood" He replied while reading through a book intently.

"She never did. I'd smell it" She heard the girls 'ew' in protest at his words and she smiled from below them, "You can't imagine what happens when she's on her period" He added with a half-smirk, and Saff laughed at his words. She liked him really. She just wanted the Spike she had met before back. There were more 'ews' but they stopped when they heard her laugh and Spike's face dropped. It was almost maniacal. There were some uneasy stares around the room and a silence.

When Angel walked back into the foyer from his phone call, he saw his group drawing straws and Spike sulking in the corner, refusing to join in. Angelina started to rub against his legs but he ignored her. He was in despair.

"What's going on?"

"Shortest straw gets to feed evil hell-bitch below" Gunn said, squinting at the straws trying to figure out which would be safe to take. Gunn took out a tiny straw and swore as Fred revealed his was the shortest.

"I'll go" Angel said, grabbing the mug and a straw. He sighed, he felt sorry for Saffron. She was going to take it hard if they ever got her back. He would know.

"Ooo, it's Father of the century! How long did you have him? Two days?" She laughed as she watched him enter.

"Watch your mouth" He snapped as she smiled, noticing the mug of blood with a straw in his hand.

"Mm, the man behind the mask. Gonna slap some good into me?" She asked, awkwardly turning around and bending over slightly still attached to her shackles. He turned her back around and roughly set her in place. He then offered the straw to her smiling lips.

"They don't see it but I do. A soul doesn't make you good, you're no hero" She continued, after a few sips.

"I know" He said flatly.

"Why don't you let them know?" She asked, "Oh, Angel! Angel! Save me angel" She mocked, putting her hand, still shackled, against her forehead. She laughed when she felt his anguish at her words. She continued to sip hungrily on the straw. Angel just watched her, he was a man of little words as it was, but he had little to offer her now.

"You know the only thing wrong with Angelus? He couldn't feel them like I can. The hurt, the anguish. It's prettier when you can feel it first-hand. They say seeing is believing, but feeling is even sweeter"

"Stop it"

"You miss it. Come on, we're all friends here, you can admit it. You miss the power, that's why you play follow-the-leader with this little gang of misfits" She sighed, rolling her eyes as if it was obvious before adding, "If he ever makes a comeback, tell him to be the first to call me" and giving him a wink for good measure.

"You won't be this much longer, Saffron. If you can hear me, Buffy's coming"

She laughed, "This is Saffron, you dickhead. She's me as I am her. Much like you are Angelus, soul or no" She paused, mulling over his words, "The slayer? Coming for little old me?" She laughed, unbothered. In fact, she knew it would taste sweeter. To feel the Slayer's loss.

"You saw what she did to me" Angel said, frowning slightly. She could feel he was worried for her if she stayed like this. He thinks she might slay her.

"She wouldn't dare. I'm the cousin" She smiled, batting her eyelids and acting innocent before snapping out of it.

"Like you wouldn't stake a close friend?" He asked. He'd heard about Hayley, someone must have been updating him on life in Sunnydale. A look in her eye indicated she might have faltered if she hadn't enjoyed the memory of staking her ex-roommate. She smiled at the memory, licking her lips.

"She was disposable, much like the rest of the cattle you have following you around" She shrugged after replaying it again with a hungry smile. Angel looked at her for a while, she could tell his mood was changing. There was an edge, she started to smile but she turned back to her drink.

"You're nothing. Your act is tired, lacking in imagination, rounding on being typecast. Call yourself a vampire? All you're doing is playing dress-up" Angel snapped harshly. She could feel he meant it. She looked up at him through her eyelashes, she had been sipping happily on the blood. Her features changed, her forehead becoming bumpy. She snapped her head up, the straw still in her mouth. She spat the blood from her mouth at Angel, the straw with it.

She was shaking with anger at his words. The first crack that had ever been seen in the cool façade. He smiled, shrugging and left the mug in front of her, too far for her to reach. She scowled, as a burning hunger rumbled through her stomach. Maybe she did need the blood. She screamed towards the locked door as she heard footsteps above her. She had been left alone again.

xoxoxo

Saffron rolled her head back up, opening her eyes from her slumber. She winced, trying to roll her wrists. She moved her head from side to side, trying to stretch herself slightly. She moved her tongue around her mouth, she could taste a strange iron-like flavour. She looked across the room, as if she was uncertain how she got there. She met Spike's eyes but couldn't hold his gaze. She had some pretty vivid memories from the last few days spinning in her mind.

"You're… back" Spike whispered softly. Still not moving towards her just in case.

"I think it changes with the night and day, that's why I was normal in the daytime" Saff explained, "I know how it feels now. Properly. The blood lust. It hurts when you're thirsty. And when I did those things… Said those things…" Her voice caught in her throat at the recent memory.

"I've missed you, Saff" His eyes said more than the sentence he uttered, she knew exactly how he was feeling and she looked away. He moved closer. Her shoulders shuddered with emotion as she felt it, the sadness. The worry. The love for her.

He grabbed her chin and roughly pulled her to face him. Laughing.

She found it all hilarious – everything she felt from him. The pain. She hadn't even changed back today. It was getting worse.

"You'd make a powerful one, love. I'll give you that" He left, not looking back. There were tears in his eyes and he couldn't see a way out of this. Why was it that so many vampires changed so drastically? Why would she when she is the most caring person he's met? He walked to his room, taking the liquor he had in there and tried to stop the tears from flowing.

After a while, Wes came in to examine her. He had a bewitched bone and he had been shaking it and muttering at her every now and again. She had done everything in her power to distract and annoy him throughout this and almost thought she had won when he rested the bone back on its velvet cushion. Although, she realised differently when he turned back to face her with several crosses hung around his neck and he walked straight up to her, his eyes scrutinising her as he wrote his findings down.

"Mm, you going to check me over? I'll show you mine if you show me yours-"

"Be quiet. I'm busy. The bite on your neck healed years ago, so it was not Spike that turned you" He muttered the latter more to himself, but maybe if the real Saffron was in there she could hear and feel comfort from an explanation, "It actually appears that your essence has been ritually removed and... and replaced with that of a demon. We have been in contact with Giles, he says that you were turned into a vampire once before we met"

"And now look at me, I have found myself at the dizzying heights of master vampire"

"You have not been sired and you are not old enough to be a master vampire" He righted her. She was technically dead at the moment, but somehow she wasn't quite anything else. The closest was, of course vampire, but only so much as she had been on Halloween courtesy of Ethan Rayne.

"All I'm asking is a little respect" She moved her hand, still shackled, so he could see her thumb and forefinger showing the little amount of respect she was expecting, "You're a real twat, has anybody ever told you that before?"

"Yes, you told me almost every day when you were in high school"

"I can smell it on you, the darkness. You're not a good person, Wesley" She had figured something out when she had changed one evening before one of her secret massacres, "Does he know? Does he know that you worked with the bad man to steal the boy?" She smiled. She had picked up in the broken time that Wesley was unbelievably guilty. He had helped take Angel's child to the Hell dimension.

"Shut up" He warned.

"Should we tell him? I can hold your hand if you like" She smirked at the regret and the self-hatred, "Angel! Angel!" Wesley put his hand over her mouth which made her pretend to bite at him so that he flinched away from him. She cackled, at the fear. Both for his life and the fate of his friendship.

"You could join us, you know. Me and sweet Ollie... Your current nature is only a hop, skip and jump away from evil… I can tell you feel it. Let go of the guilt… walk into the light…" She grinned, "The metaphorical kind, of course"

"You're playing into his hands. Know that"

"Okay. Well, know that when one of you slips up, I'll be waiting. And when I am eventually out of this prison, you will be the first that I drain and torture. Not necessarily in that order" He didn't wait for her to finish her sentence before he walked off to find some more books, crunching on an apple as he went. This maddened her, she should be listened to.

"I'm bored!" She screamed so everyone in the hotel could hear her. She felt their emotions when they heard her voice and it made her smile wide. She licked her lips at the feeling. It had been another day of fruitless researching from those upstairs. It was starting to become hopeless and she was revelling in that emotion the most.

"Nobody cares man" She almost jumped, not realising someone was there but she just blinked in surprise, not in a way that anyone would notice. She turned her head to see who it was. Gunn.

She smelt him then. All at once. She could hear his heart beating steadily, he wasn't scared of her. She would have to change that. She sweeped her eyes down his body. Then slowly up to his eyes. She could feel he was attracted to her. She smiled, batting her eyelashes.

"You could let me out of here…"

"You could shut the hell up"

"I feel it almost as much as you do" She smiled coyly, moving her eyes down below the waistband of his trousers, moving her head to the side. He turned away from her, shaking his head. She was trying to flirt her way out of the shackles. His crossbow in hand. He was on watch in case Oleander came to finish her off.

She watched, sighing. She stared for a while then whispered something inaudible. He turned slowly. He felt lust all at once. He wanted her. More than he had ever wanted anything. He stared at her, confused. She just smiled cruelly, beckoning him.

"Come on, no one will ever know" She purred, biting her lip and shaking her head, "You'll be rewarded when you let me out of here" She batted her eyelashes and blew a kiss at him as he moved to unshackle her, he couldn't fight her influence. It was too strong. He was staring into her eyes after he released her. She pulled him by the shirt and kissed him roughly. But something stopped her. Enough. She made him feel the worst pain he had ever felt making him clutch his head, before she grabbed him, bringing him to the foyer.

Everyone was there as she swaggered in, pulling Gunn by the shirt and waving a crossbow around at the others. She turned Gunn, holding him by the throat now as everyone's eyes were on her. Angelina hissed at her and ran away to the room Spike had been sleeping in alone. The cat had been keeping him company during the day, but it wasn't the same for either of them without Saff.

"Hi guys, you got the memo then! So nice of you all to gather for my big showdown" She looked at each pair of eyes around the room as she spoke, licking her lips with anticipation. It felt so good to feel their pain at what she had been turned into. She could get drunk on the power. She was going to make quick work of them and then take a little trip back to Sunnydale. She had a certain Order to visit. She would enjoy tearing this world apart. And, then, double-crossing Oleander on her way. She didn't like him even now, but she knew that working with him was the only way forwards.

"Love, let him go. Take me instead" Spike stood up, walking into the centre of the room.

"You think I want you Spike? You're no good to me with the chip. I want a real monster, I want Angelus" She said, staring into his cold blue eyes. Amber. They snapped away and he started to storm off, "Don't go! You'll miss all the fun!" She called after him, in reality wanting to feel the pain she had inflicted on him more closely.

She shrugged, "Can't win them all" as she threw the crossbow to the ground, enjoying the clatter it made as it fell to the floor. They were all silent, watching with horror and she was gorging herself on the emotion. She grabbed Gunn and started to bite into his neck. The others charged at her, starting to attack her and she threw Gunn away from her to distract them. She took several paces back and smiled, blood running down her lips.

"I almost forgot! I can make people feel things!" she said, focusing on hurting them all, "Silly me!" She said, inflicting an unbearable pain on the room. They all screamed, putting their hands up to their heads. She smiled when Wesley's knees buckled and he fell to the floor. She sauntered out, swaying her hips slightly and walked off into the night, "I think I should kill something now…"

xoxoxo

He hit his latest second-in-command with a thump.

Thump. She threw wild punches and kicks at the woman in the alley before draining her dry.

He spun around and snapped his neck with a sickening crack.

Crack. She broke his bone as she slammed his hand behind his back, enjoying the fear.

Oleander threw the body to the ground with a thud.

Thud. Saffron threw the drained body to the floor on top of the previous meal she had found.

Saffron swaggered down the alleyway, licking the blood off her fingers as she walked. Cackling as she did. She then staggered, smiling as she was almost drunk on the blood. She was taking the long-cut back to Sunnydale, wreaking havoc on the way. She was enjoying herself, feeling the pain was gratifying and she was excited to see her shadow-self and tell him tales of L.A. She could help bring the world to its knees and cause the slayer unimaginable pain while she was at it. She paused, feeling something behind her. It made her smirk, she knew that smell. Cigarette smoke and… something she still couldn't put her finger on.

"Spike? Why do I feel like you want to step out of the shadows and join me?" She said, whipping her head around to face him as he stepped forward.

"Because I do" He said, smirking. What she said made him think. He missed it. Everything she was talking about. He really missed it. God, he was so conflicted. She mirrored his smirk, she knew it. Felt it. She walked over to him slowly, swaying her hips, taking in his entire body as she walked. She pressed herself to him, feeling the side of his neck with her hands and he turned his head slightly to let her. His eyes closed as he felt her touch. Her nail was long and it sliced into his flesh. She leaned in slowly, he almost shivered with anticipation as he felt her tongue slide down the fresh cut. Savouring each drop. She moved back, mesmerised by the look he was giving her.

"How about we make it equal?" She said, eyeing his neck again, "Eye for an eye. A bite… for a bite" She motioned her hand to display her own healed bite.

"Make the whole world blind, pet"

"Did you not hear? I am the eye, I can't go blind"

He moved to expose his neck to her further. She smirked, changing. Her features shifted again. Spike watched it happen, her grey eyes a brilliant amber. Her pearly fangs sticking out as she smiled, licking her lips which were already stained crimson. He found her captivating. He had never thought much about other vampire's game faces. But even like this, to him, she was breath-taking. She leaned in, mouth wide as she started to bite into the side of his neck. Spike closed his eyes, his hand in her hair as her teeth pierced the soft skin on his neck. A low moan escaped his lips and she smirked as she latched onto his neck.

All at once, everyone sprung out of their places and turned to a pint-sized woman for direction. She nodded and Angel did too.

"Now!" she shouted and Spike pushed her off him and stepped back. Saff's feet were suddenly taken from under her. Saffron was taken off-guard and knocked her head on the concrete.

When she woke up, she was back at square one. Chained up at Angel investigations. This time, Buffy and Angel were stood in front of her, frowning slightly.

"Clever" She smirked, "Interesting use of a vampire from the slayer. I'll give you points for creativity"

"Can it, evil Saff" Buffy said shortly, taking out a piece of paper from her pocket and re-reading, getting herself ready.

"The slayer and her consort. The romance novels didn't warn you about sex before marriage did they?" She laughed, "Does it hurt? The ancient heart-break of a woman and her lost love?"

"Stop it"

"I could, but I don't want to. I like the sorrow I feel when I mention your sordid pasts" She smiled widely, "It tastes so pretty!" she cackled.

"Nobody else is laughing, girl" Angel snapped, a slight lilt at the end, this Saffron brought his darker side out and he hated it. She saw through everything; she would be incredibly dangerous if she was allowed to carry on.

"No, especially not Buffy… did she tell you about the bloodletting yet?" She laughed further, "This wasn't a ritual though. She wouldn't give you a single bite but she happily paid for it. Bitten by all those filthy vampires just to feel something. Call yourself a Slayer?" Buffy's face paled as Angel looked at her. Their hearts breaking anew. She smiled, licking her lips at the feeling. Buffy had heard enough. She started to recite as Saff frowned, unsure what was going on.

The Scoobies and Angel's team had been working together behind the scenes. Covertly. They had managed to infiltrate the Order. Figure that by restoring her vampire persona from Halloween acted as a 'pseudo-siring' as Giles put it (before Wesley could get a word in) and had turned her into a stereotypical vampire. One that would align with Oleander's views. It explained that it wasn't her, but she had still committed those acts.

"The sands of time, the orb of life. Bring back the sign of being; human nature back intact. The cycle as it should be, remain on the path" Buffy spoke clearly as she crushed the strange orb that she had beaten out of one of Oleander's disciples. A crack of light showered the room, all that could be heard was a murmured "Shit" from Saff's direction before the light cleared and revealed her hung from her shackles, limp.

"Did it work?" Angel asked, his concern for her was evident even on his face. She should be restored back to her human self.

"We're not done" Buffy said with a deep sigh, finding another piece of paper. Spike walked down at this point, checking on what was going on. He didn't want to have to watch the girl he loved turn on her closest friends again. She spoke so harshly, but she was full of such confidence. The conviction behind her words spooked even him. He walked to stand beside the pair and they filled Spike in as he just stared at Saff's form. He wanted her back. So desperately.

"We all still in agreement?" She asked, her face wavering as she asked it. Spike had been the only one to hesitate in this decision. It ate him up, the guilt that he began to start to feel ever since he had known her. It was only growing now. He didn't want her to have to remember this though. Angel had agreed immediately knowing that it was too great a burden to handle. With this confirmation, Buffy uttered another spell at the same time as Tara and Anya were channelling the magics her way.

"It's for the best" Buffy said slowly, more trying to convince herself. They were staring at Saff who still hadn't come-to yet. Angel turned back to go and brief his team on the situation.

"Agreed" Spike nodded once but his face didn't reflect his words. He didn't want to have to do this. But he couldn't think of any other way.

"I hate it when we agree" Buffy shivered.

"You and me both" He directed at her, but couldn't move his eyes from Saff.

Buffy left L.A, saying a painful goodbye to Angel, not able to explain herself to him. She faux-cheerily said goodbye to the others before she left. She didn't stay to watch Saffron wake up, she would wait to talk to Saff at home.

xoxoxo

Saffron and Spike were sitting in the Desoto, still parked outside of Angel's hotel. The silence had been deafening since they got in. Spike was staring out of the window, not being totally honest with her about this was going to be hard. But she couldn't know. It would destroy her.

"Why did they all flinch when I tried I hug them?" Saff asked, putting her seatbelt on and frowning in concern. She stared at her hands, they felt weird. Like there was something on them. But she couldn't see anything.

"They chose to live in LA, what's their reason for anything?" he shrugged, starting the car up.

"What happened to Gunn?"

"That evil vamp we were tracking, took a chunk out of him"

"Oh, I don't remember tracking anything" She frowned in confusion. She rubbed her forehead, it felt wrong when she felt how flat it was. But it was the same forehead she had always had. She pulled down the visor to check her face in the mirror. She blinked hard, she could have sworn her eyes were amber, not their usual grey but when she opened her eyes again there was no amber. She checked the rest of her face, her usual dark circles under her eye were prominent and her hair smelt as if it had just been washed although she didn't remember the last time she had washed it. She felt so odd. Like something was missing.

There was something big, trying to escape from the back of her mind but every time she focused on what it was it just disappeared from her mind.

"What happened? I don't remember… anything" She said, slowly flipping it back up and looking to Spike who still hadn't driven off in the car. He was just sitting there with the engine running. His face appeared much more gaunt than usual. he appeared almost... hollow.

"You were really ill, love. Another trick from our mate Ollie" He tried his hardest to choose his words so he wasn't lying. She would know if he was.

"So why do-"

"Enough of the twenty-bloody-questions, pet. Here, have these, should keep you quiet. You don't need to be thinking of any of that rot" he chucked some snacks onto her lap, they were all her favourites. He had been out to get gas and her snacks and left her awkwardly stood with Angel's friends who she would barely recognise if she was asked to pick them out of a line up after today.

She couldn't remember anything at all from the past week and a half. Her brows had been set in a confused furrow since she woke up in the foyer leaning against Spike. She nodded at his words and turned the music back up, settling her head against the window. She unwrapped some candy and shoved it in her mouth. She felt almost disappointed as she chewed on it, as if her mouth was expecting something else.

She felt cold. A spine-chilling feeling, the one she had only felt when in contact with Tara. Not the kind a blanket could help, although she appreciated it when Spike covered her with his duster when they stopped behind another car. He looked at her, worry evident in his face. He hoped she would never remember anything. He stroked her cheek softly as she began to fall into a deep sleep. She felt exhausted for some reason.

Why do I feel so guilty? Was all that circled her head as she fell asleep.