Darkness felt safe. Quiet. The body felt heavy but like wearing an old piece of clothing, nostalgic but the lingering thought of it needed to be discarded eventually. Everything seemed to work. Fingers moved. Toes moved. It was easy to breathe in and out. There was a feeling of weakness but that was due to the recovery. Glancing at the body when bandages were changed, everything was healing up nicely. The scars that once were there were all fading away. It felt comfortable being bandaged up. Feeling the air against the skin seemed wrong. Seeing hair, eyes, or any part of the face seemed wrong.
It was easier to keep eyes closed instead of looking at the hospital room. The familiar sound of a person coming through the door to get the daily checkup broke up the times of when to keep eyes closed.
"You have a visitor today," the nurse spoke in a cheerful voice. They headed over to the first bed. The curtain was closed around it. "They have been wanting to see you ever since they heard you were here. I'll let them in. They may help you with your recovery. Don't worry. The curtain will stay around you until you are ready." There was silence from the occupant. "Okay. I will show them in now." The nurse waved at the door.
The occupant watched the silhouette of a person coming by the curtain. There was a sense of familiarity. The occupant raised up.
"Ah, let me help you, no need to worry," the nurse pushed a button to move the bed up for the occupant. "Take as much time as you need." The nurse left, closing the door.
"It's been a while," the voice spoke from the familiar silhouette. A male voice, young, perhaps around the same age as them.
The occupant's eyes went wide. They knew that voice. They tried to put a face to that voice but it wasn't happening. Someone with short hair that had feathery type of ends reaching to what seemed like the mid neck or the chin perhaps.
"Don't strain yourself," the voice continued. "They informed me that you have lost your memories. It's going to be a while before you can regain them, if you regain them. I'm just happy you're alive. After the incident, we all thought you would never make it."
This was news to the occupant. They wondered to themselves what had actually happened to them to be in this state.
"But that's all in the past now," the voice became lighter. "You're alive and that's all that matters. Do your fingers still work?"
The occupant looked down their fingers. Moving them and bending them.
The familiar person let out a chuckle. "I bet you are moving them." The occupant looked back to the silhouette. The person let out a sigh of relief. "You probably don't remember it now but you love playing the piano. Some day you hoped to have your own concert. Perhaps it's closer in the future than it was back then. I can bring a keyboard by if it helps you remember." The occupant nodded their head. "Okay! I will do that. I won't take up much more of your time since it's the first day but I'm looking forward to our visits in the future. I'm glad you're alive, my friend."
The familiar person walked away, they turned around to wave before heading out. It was a short visit but a lot to take in for the occupant. There was another occupant in the next bed over with a curtain drawn around them as well.
"Was that your friend?" The second occupant asked.
"I-I guess," the first occupant shrugged their shoulders.
"Do you remember who you are?" The second occupant continued.
"N,no," the first one shook their heads. "Do you?"
"I don't know either," the second one replied. "Then you don't remember who your friend was either?"
The first occupant stared back to the door area. "I think I remember a bit of them. Like pieces to a puzzle. Some things feel hazy and blurry."
"Can you really play the piano?" The second one was curious.
"I don't know," the first occupant shrugged their shoulders. They moved their hands out in front of them to lay on their lap. They moved some of their fingers up and down on the blanket. It seemed more of boredom and playfulness than precise and with rhythm. "Hmm. Hm." They hummed a bit, tilting their head. Maybe their 'friend' lied to them or if they really did know how to play the piano, that part was also lost.
The first occupant tried a few more times, now just playing around until a tune popped in their head. They watched their fingers move in a way they didn't think they could. The humming continued as their fingers moved. Their hands didn't stay on the lap either. They moved lengthways back and forth as if there was a keyboard there.
"Wow!" The second occupant was intrigued. "You can play! You must have remembered something!"
The first occupant ended after a few minutes. Their heart racing due to the motion. It was also racing as they were scared of what had just happened. It felt like someone else had taken over their body for just a moment. Like someone had opened a door to all the things they were missing only to do this before going back through the door. A door that felt like it was jammed which needed lots of strength to pull open. It was silent between them.
"Are you, are you a boy?" The first occupant asked.
"Yeah?" The second occupant felt awkward answering. "Are you?"
"Me too," the first occupant nodded. "I don't know what came over me asking that. Some things I just know. Like that. I am a boy. I know this is a hospital. I need to eat to survive. I know what it's like out there." He looked to the walls. "I know but I also don't know. I know some things but I don't know a lot either."
"Weird," the other tilted their head. "Are you all covered in bandages?"
"Yeah, you?" the first one nodded.
"Yeah," the second one looked at his bandaged hand. "Does it feel comfortable to you to be in it?"
The first one nodded again. "It does. Has anyone said a name to either of us?"
The second shook his head. "No. Your friend didn't even say his name."
"Should we look at one another?" The first occupant looked over to the area where the voice was coming from.
"Uh," the second occupant hesitated. "D-do you think it will make us worse?"
"We won't know until we try," the first occupant shrugged his shoulders.
"Okay, on the count of three," the second occupant reached out to grab the curtain. "We shall open the curtain enough to see one another."
"Okay," the first occupant nodded. He grabbed the curtain, ready to pull it on cue.
"Ready, one, two, three!" The second occupant counted down. The two pulled the curtains open enough to see one another.
Both were wrapped in bandages. Their faces were covered but only the mouth, nostrils, and eyes were left open. The hair wasn't covered. Gauze wrapped around them like mummies. They stared at each other. Taking in each other's appearance of what they could make out.
"You have long hair!" The two pointed out to one another. They let out a chuckle.
"What does mine look like?" The first occupant asked. There was some fear he had on seeing his appearance.
"A light green," the second occupant described. "Wavy too. You also have brown eyes. What about me? Describe me."
The green haired boy looked over to the second occupant who was waiting. "Brown hair, wavy as well. Yet you have green eyes. You're the opposite of me." The two let out a chuckle once again.
"We better close the curtain again, our nurses might not like that," the brown-haired boy lowered his head.
"Yeah, but we can always do it again," the green haired boy suggested.
"That sound's good," the brown-haired boy nodded. The two closed the curtains on the other.
The two talked to one another in secret. Trying to help the other remember what their past life was. Some things they remembered, like food, and movies. Other things like their name, parents, or family, was a loss to them.
In a few days, the brown-haired boy had a visitor. He could not see through the curtain but could make out that it was a woman. Her hair was short but it was fluffed out like wings on either side of her head. He somehow had a soft smile when he saw her hair. It was a nice feeling seeing that silhouette before him. He didn't know how to explain it.
The gal that stood before him didn't speak for a moment. He could tell that she moved her arm to cover over her heart. "I was so worried about you." Her voice was soft and sweet but almost silent as she started to speak. "You scared me to de-you scared me. I don't know what I would have done if you were gone." This tugged at his heart. "After all this time I waited still. I kept telling myself, 'no news is good news.' They wouldn't tell us anything." She bowed her head a bit. "But you're doing great now." She sniffled a bit. She raised her head up staring at him through the curtain. "They said you might not be able to remember anything but that's okay. You're fine. You got over that hurdle. We can get over this one, even if you don't remember anything. I will stick by you, if-if you want me to." She wiped her face. "The hospital only allows certain visitors and certain times, so I am going to do my best to be there for each visit." She took a step forward and grabbed the curtain. "I am happy that you're alive and well. All of us are. We can't wait for you to released from the hospital. There is so much that you have missed. I can't stay long. They said the first visits can cause trauma if we stay too long but I'll be back again, maybe with the things you used to eat." She paused before grabbing the curtain with her other hand. "Bye." Her voice was soft again. She let the curtain before slowly walking out.
When she was gone, the green haired boy turned to him. "You have a girlfriend?"
The brown-haired boy was still taking it all in. "I,I-I-I guess so." He was just a shocked but as he was going over how he felt while listening to her, it made sense.
"She seemed really worried about you," the green haired boy felt a sting to his heart. Was this jealousy? Yet he felt nothing while seeing the silhouette of her. He didn't know what it could be.
"She did," the brown-haired boy agreed. "You sound hurt? Do you not remember if you have someone?"
The green haired boy shook his head. "I don't. I felt a stab to my heart but I don't feel like I wish she said that to me. Maybe there was someone for me."
"Should we try to speak to our friends?" The brown-haired boy asked.
"No," the green haired boy was firm. "I don't think so. Something is telling me we shouldn't. I don't know why but I am not. You can do what you want, but not me."
The brown-haired boy was silent. He was mulling it over. There was something off about this place. "We can only trust each other." He agreed with the green haired boy.
In a white room, there were two white arm chairs with a marble table between them. On the table was a black and white marbled chess board with gold inlay. There were two players, Selena who was playing the white set and across from her was Rau Le Creuset, playing with the black set. Selena knew this was a dream as it was reoccurring.
She looked down to see where the game was at.
"Hesitating," Rau moved a piece. She jerked up to view him. He wasn't in his ZAFT commanding attire but a white suit with a white shirt. The first few buttons were left open. His face still guarded by the white mask he would always wear. "You seem to like me in this outfit." He looked to her. "Yet you still allow me to wear the mask."
Selena never cared for what she wore in the dream but she always took note of it. She was wearing her white nightgown and white slippers. "You use to not wear the mask when I first met you, but that was when you wore red. You weren't allowed to wear the mask then but now, you wear it all the time." She glanced down at the board before moving a piece. "I still respect you, even if you are dead, and this is just my subconscious warning me."
Rau smirked. "Mm. It is. No teeth falling out or reliving your younger days as a student, just sitting across from me, playing chess. You never were normal."
"Says the man who wears a mask," Selena teased. "You said I was hesitating."
"You should know better than to hesitate," Rau criticized. "You know all along what he is planning. You may have hoped he didn't use them like that but you knew it was going to happen. Stop beating yourself up. You never cared about feelings in this ongoing war, why start now?" Selena watched him move a piece. "He's continuing on what my original purpose was. Our predecessor wants genetic perfection. Or have you forgotten that?"
Selena gave him a knowing look. "I have not forgotten." She swiped up his piece while replacing her own. He held out his hand to take the piece from her. She let it drop into his hand. He grabbed her hand as well, holding onto it. She glanced at it before staring at him.
"You remember why I wear the mask?" He asked her.
"You hate to see his face," Selena explained. "It serves as a reminder that you are a clone of him. About all the trauma he has caused you. The mask alleviates those thoughts you harbor."
Rau took off his mask with his other hand. "Yet, I remember after finally getting through to you besides the walls you built up against my predecessor, you did say that I am handsome." He could feel the tension rising. She wanted to let go of his hand but he kept it wrapped in his. "You can't seem to look at this face without harboring hostility. Even with long hair, trying to put up differences between one another, we can't alter this face. Cosmetic surgery wouldn't do anything to help either. We are clones, nothing can change that." He placed the mask back on and loosened her hand to let it slip out. He placed the chess piece on his side. "Even if we became friends, eventually you would have to kill me as well." Selena glanced away. "And Rey. Any clone of that man, you are programmed to kill. Even if we decided to go against him."
"Rey never wore the mask," Selena pointed out.
"He may have eventually," Rau was thinking of what move to do next. "Gilbert helped us both. I, also was the father figure in Rey's life along with Gilbert. We wanted Rey to be his own person, to not be filled with the same lies I was. The medicine helped against our rapid aging, but he would be haunted to see the face of the man he was supposed to become. He would eventually dawn the mask. Does he wear a mask?"
"Yes," Selena nodded. "And has long hair."
"Didn't want to resemble him either," Rau chuckled. "Or making it easier for himself as he knows you got along with me and Rey. What name did he choose for himself?" He moved a piece.
"Dr. Donovan Landry," Selena started to think of her next move.
"Not his fake name," Rau lowered his voice a bit. "His name, Selena."
"Why am I always the white set?" She switched subjects on him.
He gave her a smirk. "You are always the white set."
"No, I am the black set, less moves and can still win, even if the white set always goes first," Selena explained. "That's my set. Sven plays the white set. That's how it's always been."
"You also play without a king," Rau pointed it out. She looked down to seen the king was there but wasn't. She placed her hand on the king, only for it to be a hologram. She moved her hand back to her side. "Historically, queens are much better without kings. You always play without ever moving him. As if he's not even there. If you did have your king, we wouldn't be having this dream. You don't dream when you're focused on your mother's goal. That's why you have us in white. Didn't you say Sven deemed you the Snow Queen, for that reason?"
"Yes," Selena moved a piece. "I think he got caught up in fairytales when he was younger. He gave me that nickname as I will do everything in my power to get what I want but I am still benevolent enough to be true to my word. That I become a person of no warmth. I become a void."
"His name," Rau asked as he went back to the matter at hand. She kept silent. "His name!" She did not want to say it. "His. Name." Rau moved a piece. Selena saw her next move. She went to move it but her hand was clasped by his again. Rau tightened his grip. "His name." His voice almost a whisper. "I need to know his name."
"Ra," she blurted it out but also waking herself up with a jolt. She tried to catch her breath. Selena looked around; she was in a familiar room. There were hospital machines around her. She was in Anita's hospital room that she made specifically for her. Selena let out a sigh of relief.
Anita was there checking her vitals. "Same dream?" She watched Selena turn on her side to grab a laptop that was placed on the nightstand.
"Yes," Selena opened it up. She switched over to SEED Mode, letting her body be on the same speed she was thinking. "Same chess game with Rau. Different strategies. Still don't know if there is a correlation that it is all one big game. This time he wanted to know his name. Which is why I woken up with a jolt. How long have I been out?"
"Two days," Anita started to unhook Selena from the equipment. "The rest are back in Orb safely. Yourself helped you out after Mikael put you in a pod. Thankfully he didn't earn another scar from you."
"His way of showing my brother he is doing his job," Selena kept typing away. She would write down her dreams to see if there was any significance. She also recorded the chess game for any correlation there. "The Room is beckoning for me, aren't they?"
"Yes," Anita frowned a bit. "I would have sent you there in a pod, but I know that's not what we agreed upon."
"Thank you," Selena got up. She had saved everything and closed the laptop. "I cannot keep them waiting." She headed past Anita to head towards a secret room. A room that Selena had helped make when she was younger before finally putting the finishing touches. It was a room Selena could destroy but didn't. There were too many secrets there and not all of them had been spoken.