All That Matters

Ok, I am so sorry that I haven't updated this sooner! Sorry, this chapter is just to get me back into the swing of writing it! Thank you to all readers and reviewers!

Chapter 6

I eventually came away from the wall, unsure of where I was, but most importantly, where he was. I couldn't believe that I had just let the man whom I had swore revenge on walk out of the room away from me. I now took the time to look around my new surroundings. It was like a big cave home, made entirely out of stone. The lake in which we had sailed across was huge, it spread too far into the darkness for me to see. There were no windows, no light, other than that that was given out by the many candles that were lit. There were metal gates that acted as doors come down from the low ceiling into the water that were closed. I turned and began to look at the furnishings and such. The place was a mess. It looked like someone had in a fit of anger completely trashed the place. It was a complete mess. The few exquisite mirrors has been long since smashed, there wasn't an item of furnishing that hadn't been broken or nearly broken. The furnishings were lavish and probably very expensive, yet worth nothing now.

The sudden departure of my unwilling host left me feeling apprehensive and somewhat uneasy. The man had a lot of emotional scarring, a lot of thoughts and feelings that he probably did not understand. There was no telling of how he was to act, or what he was likely to do. However, I knew that I was not to leave this… cavern, without his help or permission. I stepped a few feet away from the wall, and looked at the destroyed items that littered the floor. A plate, white and cold porcelain, broken in half, sat with untouched mouldy food on it, hinting that the man had not eaten for quite some time. I picked up a nearly burnt down candle, and carried it with me, edging slowly around the lake. I knelt down to pick up one of the many pieces of paper that floated on the water's surface. It looked like a music sheet, but the ink had long since washed off. I watched as the blank sheet moulded its wet self to fit my hand before I picked it off, watching it tear silently in my fingers.

I stood again and looked around my new surroundings. There were arches in the walls, obvious entrances into other rooms. He could have been in any one of those rooms, and in all honesty I didn't want to go searching for him. My stomach gave me a gentle reminder that I hadn't eaten for a few days, well, what seemed like a few days, I didn't actually know how long it had been. I took a few steps away from the waters edge and went towards the plates that littered the floor. I bent down to pick them up and look at the hallmarks on them to see just how expensive they. There was nothing, I guessed that that part had been broken off or smashed. My stomach gave me another lurch as I stood and walked over to the grand organ that I had only just noticed which was ridiculous given its size. It was the only thing that didn't have a slight layer of dust beginning to cover it. It had obviously been used recently, although there were no music sheets to be seen except the ones in the lake. Did this man play without music sheets? My finger reached out to gently touch one of the key without pressing it down, feeling its smooth surface underneath my finger pad. I was so tempted to press it down, to hear a gently chord or note, but I didn't in fear of him hearing. I removed my hand from the keys, taking it back gently. I didn't even hear his footsteps behind me.

"You made a wise decision by not playing that." He startled me, my hand flying to my grasp my chest, taking a huge gasp of breath.

"Mon Dieu! You startled me!" I said as I turned to face him, I wanted to see him, never for him to be behind me out of my sight, I didn't trust him or what he was capable of. He said nothing, merely looked at me, analysing me. I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. Eventually he spoke.

"Why are you still here?"

"Because I don't know how to leave."

"It's very simple, Mon amour, you get into the boat and leave."

"Simple it may be to someone who knows these catacombs and unending trails, more difficult it is for someone who does not and lacks the ability to see in the dark!"

"I cannot see in the dark, you made so much noise I could pin point your position." There was silence again. I didn't want to argue with this man. I shifted my feet slightly, my face and arm was aching. I still didn't know the extent of my burns, but as began to feel my torso ache, I guessed that it wasn't just my arms and face.

"How long has it been since you have bathed? Or changed clothes?" My head snapped up.

"Why?"

"Because your clothes are filthy and there is a faint smell of rotting flesh about you."

"Why thank you, you really know how to compliment a woman." His face softened slightly underneath the mask. I could see that he wanted to help me to a certain degree. If it wasn't for my foolish pride and last strand of immature dignity, I might have accepted.

"How often have you changed the bandages?"

"I haven't. They are the same ones since I received them from the hospital."

"Then you run the risk of infection and septicaemia with soiled bandag…"

"I know and I don't care! It's already infected, but I really don't care!"

"It can cause death…"

"I know it can!"

"Then you must clean the wounds…"

"Monsieur, I thank you greatly for your obvious concern, but I really do not care."

"Let me…"

"Do not touch me!" I stepped backwards towards the organ and lifted my hand to slap his away should it come any closer. "I don't want your hands anywhere near me! They've caused too much pain for me so please, excuse me if I decline your kind offer of assistance."

"You will surely die."

"I don't mind. There isn't much to live for now."

"Don't be so foolish."

"Ha! You, of all people, trying to distil into me the will to live? When there is rotting, untouched food all over, broken pieces of… of… furniture lying all over… Ha! I have nothing to live for anymore! All chances of love and happiness have been snatched away from me, you took care to that! As for living day to day, how is that possible, when already people hiss at me in the street? I have already been told to leave my family home for my father's fear of the mobs coming to hurt me, the freak! I feel nothing but physical pain now! Until a little while ago I felt anger and pain towards you! I came here with the intent of killing you to seek my revenge! I have lost that, the last bit of emotion that I possessed! How weak I am! The man who is ruined my life is stood in front of me, and I can hardly bare to look at you! I am pathetic! There is nothing left for me!" I only noticed that my knees were now touching the floor as I looked at the man's knees, realising I was on the same level as them. Tear threatened to burst over the rims of my eyes. "So please, excuse me if I have lost the will to live! I beg you, leave me to wallow in my pool of self pity for a short while before my death!" I had not let the tears flow, although I knew that he would be able to tell that I was nearly crying.

I looked up straight away as he began to walk towards me, but didn't have time to move before he had scooped me up and was carrying me up a small flight of stone steps. As stupid as it sounds, I had only just noticed how much any movement hurt me, how my skin seemed too tight for the bones, that it might rip at any moment. I guessed that the nerve endings were beginning to grow back. Been pressed tightly to his chest was hurting my torso, the creases in my bent elbow also feeling more sensitive.

"Get off me!" I began to fight and wriggle against him, but as I said, each movement seemed to be getting harder and harder, more and more painful.

"You're, you're hurting me!"

"Oh please Mademoiselle, I am barely touching you…"

"No please, put me down, you're hurting me!" Looking down at my masked face he sighed, and put me down in the entrance of the room that he was taking me to. I winced as my body straightened to stand before looking around.

It was a bedroom.

I turned in horror back to him, he was blocking the exit.

"No, no please… I beg of you…"

"What is wrong with you, you foolish child?" This time panic had spread over me. I knew exactly what would happen in this situation, as a young teen my friend had told me the acts that adults engage in, and how one man had forced himself upon a good friend of mine. That friend had told another friend who in turn had told me. She told me about how much it had hurt, and what a terrifying experience it had been for her. I had asked my mother whom had confirmed this and had told me what would be required of me as I grew into a woman. She also explained that THAT didn't belong to me, it would belong to my husband and he alone would have the right to demand it, but also explained how some men would also try to demand it. That had scared me ever since, my single worst fear.

"No, no, please, please…" I couldn't conceal my fear as tears began streaming down my face.

"You are in a lot of pain Mademoiselle, lie down on the bed and I will help you." He began to walk towards me. I felt my pulse rise and suddenly I couldn't control my breathing.

"No, you mustn't, please…" I ran backwards to the wall, away from the bed. He stopped moving. A look of realisation appeared across his features that I simply didn't understand.

"Bon seigneur! You don't truly think that I…"

"No! Please, I beg you, don't come any closer, please, no…" He looked at me with a look that I had never seen before, a confused, yet trying to understand me, trying to figure out what to say to me to put my mind at ease.

"I am not going to rape you, Mirabella. I understand that you don't trust me, and that I have struck you before, but my intentions are not to hurt you."

"I, I don't believe you…" I answered quietly. He sighed deeply

"I don't expect you to. However, if you do not change those bandages and seek medical attention to your wounds, you will surely die. As surprising as it may sound, I would like to help you." I didn't move. Neither did he. He waited a few moments for me to react, but I did nothing. "Very well." He began to walk backwards out of the room, however turned to a wardrobe door and opened it. He pulled out a folded up shirt and pair of pantaloons and walked over to the end of the bed and placed them down upon it. "If my guesses are correct, your garments will be soaked with all kind of rotting flesh and body fluids. They must be removed to prevent anymore infection." He took his lingering hand away from his clothes and began to walk back towards the door. "I understand that they will be too big, but they will do for now. I'll leave you to it then, Mademoiselle." And with that, he left the room, leaving me backed against the wall in case he should return, even though I had heard his disappearing footsteps travel down the stone stairs.

Ok, I do not know French. Any French that you see has been put into an online translator... so excuse me if it's wrong! Corrections vey much apperciated! Please tell me what you think! Thank you!