Hey Barby!
Listen… Let's quit being enemies and start being friends. C'mon! It's getting old and I'm tired of running from you and looking behind my shoulder every bloody second of the day. You can listen to me or:
a) Shoot me while I'm using the bathroom
b) Poison my food
c) Whack me over the head with a beer bottle
Or d) all of the above.
Hope to get a response!
Your soon to be friend,
Cap'n Jack Sparrow.
P.S. I'll give you a BIG FEATHERY HAT if you say yes!