A/N: I'm back! Yeah, it's been a bit, but hey, what can I say, school sucks. A few announcements:

I fixed the formatting! Thanks a ton to Breetanya Violet, who showed me what to do. All of the former chapters have been reformatted and reposted.

Unfortunately or fortunately, depending on when you ask me, I found this wonderful website online called the Harry Potter Lexicon. It has EVERYTHING that's ever been proven as a fact from the HP books. The downside to that is that some of my canon was off, and since I'm trying to keep this as close to canon as possible, I had to do some serious rewriting. There were a few changes made in every chapter, either for grammar and such or for canon problems. The biggest changes were in chapter 3, which I would recommend everyone re-reading: the fight with Malfoy had to be changed completely, because I found out that Malfoy was a seventh year when these guys were first years, so I introduced a new villain who WILL play a major role later in the story. Also, the conversation between Sirius and James at the end had to be changed. Other than that, the changes were mostly small stuff, but you might wanna go back and re-read, just in case.

And how could I forget my awesome reviewers! Liz Black, sorry, this one isn't that much happier, but the happiness is coming! PS-Learn how to spell cough. MosingCode, good eye, that "I'm sorry" will come into play later in the story, don't worry! And Breetanya Violet, thanks again for the formatting thing, and be happy, the wolf only has 2 or 3 lines in this one! YAY! Thanks so much you guys, you make it worth taking the time to write!

And now, finally, on to the actual story, before I start getting things thrown at me. I was psyched for this one…the first page of chapter 7 is the 50th page of my story! REJOICE! Anyway, I don't own anything you recognize, but Becca is mine, Liz is my cousin's but I'm stealing her, and the ideas are mine. Enjoy!

Sammy Solo

For what felt like an eternity but could have been only an instant, he wasn't sure if he was dead or alive. Through the haze that clouded his brain, he couldn't even remember his own name. He knew that he was; who or what he was, he couldn't quite grasp.

And he kept hearing voices. There were four, as far as he could tell, being, as he was, not dead and not alive. He couldn't hear full sentences, nor could he tell if he was really hearing anything at all.

"-should have seen the Shack-"

"-nearly killed him-"

"-must wait to speak to him-"

"-thirty more days…"

And then the pain hit. His whole body ached, and different areas positively screamed in agony.

Oh yes, he was alive.

He took a deep breath, remembering that being alive meant he had to have air, but immediately regretted it as pain tore through his chest and coughs rocked his body. Tears welled up in his eyes and spilled over onto his cheeks. As the coughing stopped, the pain remained.

Somewhere in his mind, he thought it might have been easier if he had just been dead.

"Mr. Lupin, are you alright?"

With his eyes closed he couldn't see who had spoken, but hearing his name was like pulling a trigger in his head. A whirlwind of images flared through his mind. A dark living room…the moving tree…Sirius's suspicious eyes…Liz's solemn face…countless nights under the full moon…a scream from the forest…and those vicious yellow eyes…

"NO!" he screamed. He sat straight up and his eyes shot open. "Leave me alone! I didn't do anything! I didn't…" He ran out of air. He was panting, sweating, and pain pulsed through his body. His eyes came into focus as a pair of hands grabbed his shoulders.

"Please, Mr. Lupin, lie down." Remus--Yes, that's my name, Remus Lupin-- looked up and blinked into the face of Madam Pomfrey, the school nurse.

"Wh-where am I?" he forced out. His mouth was dry, his throat raw, and as he spoke, he felt like he was swallowing shards of glass.

"You're in the hospital wing, Mr. Lupin. Please, lie down." He allowed the pressure on his shoulders to force him back down onto the bed.

"You gave us a quite a scare, young man," Professor Dumbledore said, coming to stand next to Remus's bed. "How are you feeling?"

Try as he might, Remus couldn't find a way to express his physical pain or his mental instability, so instead he licked his parched lips and croaked out, "Thirsty." Immediately, Madam Pomfrey hurried from his side and into a back room. Professor Dumbledore chuckled and sat down on the edge of Remus's bed. Behind him, Professor McGonagall could just be seen, wringing her hands nervously. Madam Pomfrey returned, carrying a glass of water. Remus forced himself onto his elbows and swallowed the entire cup in one go. The water was cold, extinguishing the fire burning in his throat. When it was gone, he took in a deep breath and stared longingly into the empty glass. Madam Pomfrey took it and smiled down at him.

"Perhaps I'll bring a bigger glass," she said, and disappeared again. Dumbledore turned back to his young charge.

"You had quite a night," he commented. "Are your transformations always this bad?" Remus swallowed painfully and tried to answer. He got as far as "Ye-" before he cringed and tried to swallow again. Dumbledore laid a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "It's alright, we'll wait until you're feeling a bit better," he said. Remus nodded thankfully and lay back on the bed. Dumbledore smiled and stood, approaching Professor McGonagall and starting a conversation in hushed tones. Remus was trying to tune into it, but Madam Pomfrey came back and stood in his view of the two teachers. She handed him a considerably larger glass, and he drank most of it down, gasping for air as he finished. The water once again fought down the flames in his throat, and this time when he tried to talk it was a lot easier.

"Thank you," he said, his voice hoarse but not painfully so. Madam Pomfrey nodded and took the glass from him, setting it on the nightstand. "I-I'm ready to talk now, Professor, if you want," Remus added, able to see Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall now that Madam Pomfrey had stepped aside. Dumbledore smiled comfortingly and sat back down on the edge of Remus's bed.

"I'm ready whenever you are, Mr. Lupin," he said. Remus nodded in response. Dumbledore smiled again. "Mr. Lupin, are your transformations always this bad?" he asked.

"Usually, yeah," Remus replied, keeping his eyes fixed on the sheets in front of him. "Sometimes it can be worse, if Mum or Dad or Liz are around it gets worse, but usually it's just like this…" He trailed off, not quite sure what to say next. The old man nodded slowly, as if turning it all over in his head. Finally he took a deep breath and smiled once again down at the young boy.

"Well, I believe that if we have Madam Pomfrey take one more look at you, then we'll leave you to it. I'll inform your instructors that you won't be in class today, and you may spend the day resting. Good day, Mr. Lupin." He turned to go, but Remus called out, and he turned back around.

"Professor, I…I think that maybe if I could just have a little time to get some sleep, I'd be okay to go to some of my classes…if that's okay…" he trailed off again, staring at the floor.

"I don't think that's really a good id-" Madam Pomfrey began, but Dumbledore cut her off.

"That will be fine, Mr. Lupin, whatever you believe you are ready for," he said. Remus looked up at the smiling Headmaster and grinned for the first time in days.

"Thank you, sir," he said gratefully. Dumbledore nodded and strode out, McGonagall following close behind. Madam Pomfrey bustled over, muttering about not being able to care for her patients as she examined Remus. When all was done, he lay back on the sheets, knowing that he needed at least a few hours of sleep to be able to do anything today. Quietly, in the back of his head, the fourth voice continued to whisper.

"Thirty more days, boy, and I'll be back…"

"Albus, with all due respect, you must be mad," McGonagall said as she followed Dumbledore from the hospital wing. "There is no way that attending classes can be good for that boy!"

"It is his decision, Minerva," Dumbledore responded calmly, continuing his walk. "He knows his own boundaries."

"He's eleven years old!" McGonagall protested. "How can he possibly know what's good for him?"

"He must learn. Perhaps more than any of his peers, Remus Lupin must learn what he is capable of very soon. Let him try. He is a smart boy; if he begins to feel ill, he knows that he will be excused from classes."

McGonagall still didn't look convinced, but she bit back her argument. What was done was done, whether or not she agreed with it. But she had a feeling that if Dumbledore had seen Remus Lupin the way he had been, had found him in that shack in a pool of his own blood, he might have changed his mind.

A few hours later, Remus took a deep breath and pushed open the door of the Transfiguration classroom. All eyes turned to him, and he felt blood rush to his cheeks as he closed the door behind him. He muttered an apology to Professor McGonagall, though he knew it was unnecessary, and dropped into his seat next to Peter. McGonagall continued with her lesson, and James and Sirius immediately turned to face him.

"Welcome back, mate," Sirius said, smiling.

"Yeah, good to have you," James said. "How's your mum?"

Remus smiled at the warm welcome of his two friends, but it fell away as he realized that he had to lie to them again. "She's okay," he answered, not being able to look them in the eyes. "She was feeling a little better, and she didn't want me to miss too many classes, so she told me to come back."

"You look like you had a rough night," Sirius commented, the suspicious glint back in his grey eyes.

"Y-yeah, I didn't sleep much," Remus said, eyes fixed on his desk.

"Well, did you-"

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, if you please, I am trying to conduct a class," McGonagall interrupted. James rolled his eyes and turned around. Sirius followed suit, sighing dramatically. When he was facing front again, he waved a hand and said, "Alright, continue."

The class giggled as McGonagall shot a quick glare at Sirius, then continued her lesson. Remus pulled out quill and parchment and started taking notes, fighting off the soreness and fatigue that plagued his body but certainly glad to be back with his friends.

"You don't think it's weird at all?" Sirius asked, studying the chess board in front of him.

"Knight to E3. No, I don't. Of course he's being distant, his mum's sick, he's probably worried," James answered, smirking as his knight put Sirius's queen in danger.

"Castle to E3," Sirius countered, and watched as his castle knocked James's knight to pieces and dragged them off the board. "But you'd think that if his mum was sick, he would have spent more time with her. I mean, he left last night and came back this morning. How much time did he really get with her?"

As James contemplated both his next move and his response to the question, Sirius looked over to Remus. He was talking to Liz in quiet tones, presumably about his mum's condition. But Sirius wasn't so sure. Remus's excuse for not sleeping much may have been okay for James and Peter, but Sirius didn't buy it. He didn't just look tired; he looked like he was in pain. There had to be something else going on.

"King to A4," James concluded. "You heard him, he said his mum was feeling better, and she didn't want him to miss school. What's so wrong with that?"

"Queen to A5," Sirius said. "That's mate, mate." James looked incredulously at the board, not believing that Sirius had actually beaten him. "And I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with it. It just seems kinda weird for him to only go home for one night, you know?"

"Yeah sure," James agreed, not sounding like he was really agreeing at all.

"My turn, I called winner!" Peter said, jumping up from his spot in front of the fireplace and standing next to James, practically jumping up and down with anticipation. James ran his hands through his hair, finally accepted his defeat, and stood up so Peter could sit down.

A few minutes later, Sirius had beaten Peter. He looked over again towards Remus in time to see Liz give him a hug and wave at the guys. Sirius grinned and waved back, then watched as she ascended the stairs to the girls' dorm.

"Remus!" James called. The other boy joined them at the table. "C'mon, mate, someone has to be able to beat Sirius."

"I'll try," Remus said, smiling and sitting down across from Sirius. Sirius observed him closely as the game progressed, watching for any hint of what was really going on. He didn't know why, but something in him told him that Remus was lying about something. And I'm going to find out what.

Remus and Sirius came to a stalemate about half an hour later, and the boys decided to retire for the night.

Liz pushed open the door to the girls' dorm quietly and closed it softly behind her. The drapes around Becca's bed were already closed; Liz had the feeling she was fast asleep. Apparently she hadn't slept well the night before either. Lily was lying on her bed, nose buried in a book, but she smiled and waved as Liz walked in. Liz smiled back, then changed into her pajamas and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth. When she returned to the room, Lily had put the book away and was getting ready for bed herself. Liz whispered a goodnight that Lily returned, and both girls closed the curtains around them.

Once again, though, Liz was having trouble sleeping. Remus is okay, I should just get some sleep, she tried to convince herself, but still her guilt clouded her mind. After all, it had been her fault that night, if she hadn't been so damn stubborn…

She tossed and turned and finally, after too long a time staring into the darkness around her, Liz gave in to the exhaustion and fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.