It was a late morning in Imp City, and another day at the office of I.M.P, with four of the company's employees sitting in the company's conference room.
Moxxie and Millie sat on one side of the table, Moxxie sat slumped forward in his seat, propping his head up with his left hand.
While Millie had her chair turned to the side, and was looking out the windows, watching the birds and traffic outside.
Loona and Lily sat on the opposite of the conference table, and sat beside each other, while Loona was on her phone playing video games.
Lily was busy sharpening her claws, using a light steel grey metal nail file, as she individually sharpened each claw meticulously.
The reason for the company meeting, and the subject of the meeting, was to discuss the company's business activity, or rather lack of.
However, their boss Blitz had yet to arrive, leaving them all sitting in the conference room, trying to pass the time while waiting on him.
* Bang! *
Then suddenly, the conference room's door was thrown open, followed with Blitz strolling into the room a moment later.
" Sorry I'm late folks, was busy in the can, now let's get this meeting started. " Blitz said casually as he stood in front of the room's whiteboard.
The whiteboard showed crudely drawn charts and graphs, lacking crucial details, and any useful information to interpret the data.
Numerous obscenities, and childish drawings where also spread across the board, all expressing and displaying frustration at the data presented.
" Alrighty, now I know business has been a bit slow lately, yeah. " Blitz said as he began pacing a bit in front of the table.
He then took a deep breath, before theatrically by him placing his hands on the conference table, and looked among his employees.
" And it's no one's fault, okay? " Blitz clarified as he quickly glancing at each of his employees as he said this.
" I'm not naming names here, Moxxie. " Blitz said, as he muttered the name of said Imp, as he quickly directed his gaze at him.
Moxxie responded with a shocked and angry glare at Blitz, before folding his arms with an annoyed huff, as he slouched back in his seat.
" Wait, wouldn't you be the most responsible for our current situation Blitz? " Lily inquired as she paused in filing her claws and looked at him curiously.
" I, that's ahh, that's a fair point Lily. " Blitz said begrudgingly, seeing as he couldn't argue against her reasoning.
Loona softly snickered at this, while Lily switched to the claws of her other hand, and resumed filing her claws with a bored look.
" Now, does anyone have any bright ideas on how we can get business drumming up again?" Blitz asked optimistically as he looked at his employees.
" Oh, what, about, a car wash?! " Millie suggested excitedly as she jumped up in her seat with glee.
" No one cares about cars being clean here, okay Millie, oh what about a billboard? " Blitz suggested enthusiastically with a big smile.
" We can't afford a billboard, sir. " Moxxie said dryly.
" Helpful, Moxxie, really glad you're in the room right now." Blitz said sarcastically, as he shoved the imp right out of his chair.
" Have you guys forgotten what service we provide?" Blitz asked, grabbing a TV remote control, and turning on the conference room's TV.
The TV screen displayed the I.M.P commercial, showing each of the team in the middle of savagely killing a human.
Blitz was shown first, enjoying beating a human to death with a baseball bat, next was Moxxie, who used a 12 gauge pump shotgun to turn a human's head to bloody pulp.
Loon was shown biting into a person's neck, and shaking the human around in her jaws like a dog with a chew toy.
Millie was shown decapitating a human from behind with a large axe, smiling as she laughed happily afterwards.
And finally Lily was shown, impaling a human through the chest and torso with her 12 inch claws from behind, before ripping them in half.
Then a the I.M.P company jingle played, and showed a series of clips of the team, killing and assassinating humans in various ways.
"Ah, those were good times," Blitz mused he turned off the TV.
" Yeah I remember, I'm still pretty pissed you made me ride that shark Blitz, in #$%&ing open water, when I blatantly told you I didn't want to. " Lily said irritably as she glared at Blitz.
" Yeah, yeah I said I was #$%&ing sorry. " Blitz said as he looked away in annoyance as he folded his arms.
" And can we get rid of the killing kids part Blitz, if not I'll just not go on those kinds of jobs, I don't wanna be apart of stuff like that. " Lily said as she looked at the tall imp.
" I'll take it under consideration. " Blitz said nonchalantly.
" And we don't need any reminding sir, considering you blew most of our salaries on that obnoxious TV ad, just last week. "
" One that you then additionally paid to have run for a full three hours, on a channel that nobody even watches." Moxxie stated dryly.
" And instead of doing that Blitz, we could have used that money to get a billboard advertisement. " Lily pointed out as she leaned back in her chair.
"Uh, hey, excuse me, what's obnoxious about a super fun jingle, alright it's a fun distraction when an advertisement spits bull$#%&. " Blitz said defensively.
" People do love musicals sir. " Millie added supportively.
" Exactly, Millie, and we're basically doing a musical! " Blitzo nodded as he did jazz hands for empathize.
" Are you gonna crush my musical theater dreams like my dad did? " Blitz asked as he looked at Moxxie with a hurt look.
"Sir, I—"
" Because right now, all I see is my dad's #$$%#% talking to me, crushing my dreams of being who I truly am inside! " Blitz said dramatically, looking like he was on the verge of crying.
" Are you trying to crush his dreams Moxxie? " Millie asked flirtatiously as she looked at Moxxie.
" I, wait what?" Moxxie asked as he looked at Millie confusion.
" I thought I knew you~ " Millie said sweetly as. she stuck her tongue out at him teasingly as her tail curled behind her.
" I can't believe you, Moxxie, after I went and made you employee of the month! " Blitz said in a hurt tone, as he showed a frame of a terrible picture of the imp.
" Okay, sir I'm sorry, but a commercial jingle is just not comparable to musical theater, nobody even actually likes the jingles! " Moxxie stated.
" I liked it." Millie said innocently.
" Do not, do not agree with him in front of me." Moxxie said, struggling to restrain the anger in his voice as he looked at his wife.
" By the way, what are we going to do with the human kid Moxxie shot? " Lily said with a hint of concern, as she gestured to a corner of the conference room.
In that corner of the room, was a hospital bed with said human kid, a young boy, laying down and hooked up to a heart monitor and IV drip.
" Hmm, forgot about the kid for now. " Blitz said with a dismissively with a wave.
" I'd like to go on the record and say that incident was Loona's fault. " Moxxie said as he glared at the hellhound.
" How's it in anyway Loona's fault, when your the one who shot the kid? " Lily asked irritably as she looked at the imp in annoyance.
" I didn't mean to, it was an accident! " Moxxie cried out, still feeling guilty about the whole thing.
" Well your lucky the bullet didn't hit any vitals, and passed clean through, and that the Zelramorta family trained me extensively in the medical field. " Lily said as she leaned back in her chair.
" Well dispatch is supposed to give us the right info on the target, it's very simple." Moxxie stated in his defence as he folded his arms and leaned back in his chair.
" Oh go sit on a #$%& Moxxie." Loona said as she rolled her eyes, not bothering to even look away from her phone.
" You sit, sit on uh, and uh a, d-do your job! " Moxxie exclaimed, flustered that he couldn't come up with a good response.
"Hey now, we don't blame our screw-ups on Loona okay, she didn't do anything wrong~" Blitz said sweetly as he affectionately hugging Loona, much to her dislike.
"Are you kidding me sir, she's awful. " Moxxie said flatly.
" Oh please, you just don't know her like I do, she just doesn't like how your so uptight. " Lily thought as she rolled her eyes in annoyance.
" Look, the point is Loona is a valued member of our family, and we don't get rid of family. " Blitz stated firmly, getting a faint smile out of the hellhound.
" Well put Blitz. " Lily said approvingly, faintly smiling at the imp's words as well.
" We aren't a family sir, you are the boss, we are the employees! " Moxxie stated firmly.
" You treat her like she's some troubled teenager, she's more like a meth-addicted homeless woman you let man the phones! " Moxxie said, to which Loona replied by flipping him off.
" That's offensive Moxxie, without homeless people, I wouldn't have half the joy and laughter I do in this life." Blitz said as he walked over and looked a window.
He then looked out to the streets below, with a broad happy smile, seeing a few homeless people sitting on the sidewalks.
" While we are on the subject of family, can you stop finding me and Millie outside of work? " Moxxie asked irritably as he looked at Blitz.
" Come on sweetie, it's not that big a deal. " Millie said as she tried to reassure him.
" Excuse me, what?! " Moxxie exclaimed as he looked at Millie in shock.
" He's snuck into our house, repeatedly, hid inside of our fridge, snuck into our bedroom, and spied on us while we slept. "
" He's stalked us when we've went out on dates, and #$%&ing filmed us while I sang to you on our anniversary! " Moxxie said as he listed off the things Blitz had done to them.
" Just, stop, doing, that." Moxxie said as he frustratingly empathized his words as he glared at Blitz.
" Also, can you stop trying to find where I live Blitz, I'm getting tired of having to keep changing my routes home. " Lily said with annoyance as she looked at Blitz.
" Wait, Blitz has been #$%&ing stalking you Lily? " Loona asked as she looked up from her phone at Blitz with an angry glare.
" Yep, he's tried following me to my home over a dozen times already. " Lily said tierdly as she looked at Loona.
" Well she didn't write down where she lived, and won't tell me, so how else am I suppose find out? " Blitz asked curiously as he gestured to Lily.
" Your not suppose to, that's the whole point. " Lily stated flatly with a dry tone.
" I don't see what the issue is, something you guys don't want me seeing?" " Blitz asked in a suggestive manner as he wriggled his eyebrows playfully.
" No! " Moxxie replied strongly at the notion as he folded his arms irritably.
" I have my reasons for keeping where I live private, stuff like this is one of them. " Lily said said flatly as she glared at Blitz in annoyance.
" Hmm, I don't see what's all the fuss is about. " Blitz said shamelessly as he nonchalantly shrugged his shoulders at his employees troubles.
" Sir, what you say and how you act, is totally inappropriate! " Moxxie stated angrily as he stood up and pointed accusingly at Blitz.
" Calm down, Mox, you're gonna have another panic attack! "Millie said as she's comforted him.
" I am calm! " Moxxie shouted, definitely not sounding calm.
" Shh shh, there, there. " Millie cooed as she hugged and comforted him.
" Okay, can we pleased stop now and get back to business, this is getting us nowhere. " Lily said as she tired to be the voice of reason and get the meeting back on track.
" Look, I don't judge the boring couple stuff you guys do outside of work hours, so don't, judge, me." Blitz said as he glared at Moxxie, while ignoring Lily.
" Oh but I do judge you sir, quite a lot actually." Moxxie stated as he glared back at Blitz.
" Mox, he's our boss!" Millie said in shock as she looked at her husband.
"Oh no no no, it's fine, Mills, your husband is just, how do I say this without being offensive, retarded. " Blitz said with a proud smirk.
" Does immaturely insulting me, make you feel better about your sad, single life?" Moxxie replied mockingly as he looked at Blitz.
" It actually does." Blitz admitted as he looked at Moxxie with a happy smile.
" The only reason you have a wife, is because you're easy to manage." Loona said nonchalantly as she scrolled on her phone.
" No he's not, you bitch! " Millie yelled angrily as she halfway climbed up on the table.
" Millie! " Lily exclaimed in shock, stunned that she called Loona, her best friend, such a thing knowing how offense it was to a hellhound.
" Do not talk to my receptionist that way, she's sensitive! " Blitz yelled at Millie as he defended his adopted daughter.
" Yes I am! " Loona said barked, showing her teeth threateningly as she wrinkled her muzzle.
" Will all of you #$%&ing shut the #$%& up and quit #$%&ing arguing already?! " Lily shouted loudly with a deep beastly growl, finally having heard enough.
Her normal voice had changed to her demonic voice, a hauntingly wrapped and distorted low and high pitched version of her normal voice.
At the same time, her red sclera turned jet blabucketd her eyes changed to large, thin, eerily fiery molten red orange glowing needles that held a animalistic anger in them.
She had also instinctively unsheathed her black claws, and all her fur stood on end, fully displaying her agitated state for all to see.
" All we're doing is pointlessly arguing, it's giving me a #$%&ing headache, this is exactly why we're in this kind of #$%&ing situation. " Lily said tierdly with a heavy sigh as she returned normal.
As she did, her fur relaxed and claws retracted, then she buried her head in her hands, as she rubbed her face in frustration.
" You okay Lily? " Loona asked as she gently patted Lily comfortingly on her shoulder.
" Huha, yeah I'm fine now. " Lily said tierdly as she looked at Loona reassuringly.
" You guys are all #$%&ing #$$holes."
All eyes suddenly turned in the direction of the voice that broke the silence, where they saw the injured human boy laying down on the medical bed.
" Wait, I thought we had the kid sedated. " Lily said as she looked at her coworkers in confusion.
" I thought so. " Blitz said with shrug of his shoulders.
" Well obviously not, I've had to go through the agony of listening to you #$%&ers #$%&ing this whole time. " The human boy said rudely.
" Oh shut up kid, you're lucky to witness this! " Blitz said irritably as he pointed at the human boy.
" Ugh, this company is such a mess! " Moxxie said in frustration as he pinch the bridge of his nose.
" No #$%&ing kidding. " Lily said tierdly as she rubbed her temples to relief some stress.
" Alright, now let's get back to talking about my outfit. " Blitz said suddenly as he gestured to his clothes.
" Nobody was talking about that." Loona said while looked at her phone in annoyance.
" Which is why I'm trying to get that ball rolling, so how does it look, It's good right? " Blitz asked as he looked at his team for their opinions.
" Hmm, yeah it does. "Lily said honestly with a casual tone as she looked over Blitz's outfit.
" It's been a literal hell having to pretend that I'm paralyzed so that you #$%$%& wouldn't kill me, but now I want that, I want death! " The human boy said dramatically as he sat up.
" Oh quit being dramatic kid, and would you stop talking so loud please, I have a headache. " Lily said as she rubbed one of her temples.
" I don't care, you are a selfish, greedy clown and I'm a kid, we're supposed to like clowns, even the creepy ones." The human boy said as he pointed at Blitz.
"Hey now, that's not very- "
" If I wanted to hear from a spineless jack#$$, I would rip out your spine and ask you some $#%&." The human boy said harshly as he pointed at Moxxie.
" That's my husband you're talking to! " Millie said angrily as she stood up in her husband's defence.
" That's your husband, I figured you were a slut, but I didn't think you needed #$%& that badly! " The human boy said as he laughed mockingly.
" And you. " The human boy said as he pointed at Loona.
" What, what about me? " Loona asked irritably as she glared at the human boy.
" Nothing, I don't talk to dogs, I'm a cat person. " The human boy said as he smugly smiled at Loona, while the rest of the team were left shocked.
" Hmph. " Loona huffed with an angry whimper as she glared at her phone.
" It's okay Loona, don't listen to him. " Lily said gently as she leaned against Loona as she patted her comfortingly on her back.
Loona immediately calmed down slightly and relaxed at Lily's touch, and reciprocated it by gently leaning against Lily as well.
" By the way, hey cat lady, can I pet you? " The human boy asked as he looked at Lily.
"W-What, no! " Lily said as she visibly recoiled at the question, sounding genuinely offended.
" Why not? " The human boy asked in annoyance.
" Kid, in case it's not obvious to you, I'm not a cat from earth, I'm a hellcat demon. " Lily said dryly in a tone devoid of emotion with a deadpan look.
" Besides, my ears are sensitive, and something like that is pretty stimulating, and a intimate thing with demons like me. " Lily said softly as she tail involuntarily swayed lightly in a nervous manner.
" Oh come on!" The human boy loudly whined annoyingly.
" She said no brat, if you try, I'll #$%&ing bite your hand off! " Loona said angrily with a threatening low growl, as she side hugged Lily protectively.
" Oh come on! " The kid whined loudly as he folded his arms in frustration.
" Wow, you know kid, you kind of are a piece of $#%&." Blitz said as he looked at the human boy.
* Bing! *
Suddenly, Loona's phone alerted her she had got a notification, and as she checked it, her angry frown quickly shifted to a smile.
" Oh #$%&, hey guys, I just got a text from our client. " Loona said as she smiled happily as she looked at her phone.
" Hm, what's it say Loona? " Lily asked curiously as she looked up at Loona looking at her phone.
"Huh, guess he was the right target after all." Loona said happily with a smile as she looked at her phone.
" Who? " Blitz asked as he raised a brow curiously as he looked at his adopted daughter.
" Him." Loona said with a wolfish smile as she pointed at the human boy.
" Me? " The human boy squeaked in fear as he pointed at himself.
" Yep." Loona replied happily with a smile.
" They wanted us to kill an actual child? " Blitz asked, mildly shocked at this news as he raised an eyebrow curiously.
" Wait, they what? " Lily asked, shocked at this news.
" That's what they're saying. " Loona said as she showed them the text message.
" Well, that's sweet #$%&ing music to my ears! " Blitz said with fiendish smile as he pulled out his pistol.
* Bang! *
" Guah! " Went the boy as he got shot in the chest, and sent him flying back into the wall behind him with a loud smack.
" Bullseye, now let's clean up up this mess, I'll get the cleaning suits and bone saws! " Blitz said as he pocketed his pistol with a smile.
" We'll get a plastic sheet and cleaning supplies. " Moxxie said dryly, as he and Millie got up.
" Huha, I'll go get a trash bag, a mop, and a bucket. " Lily said flatly as she got up as well.
" I'll come help you Lily. " Loona said as she got up and followed Lily out the room.
Working together, the team made short work of cleaning up all traces and smell of blood from the conference room.
Once that was done, the body was prepped for disposal by Blitz and Moxxie, and then taken to the building's trash chute.
" Alrighty, glad that's all done with lets call it a day. " Blitz said with a smile after stuffing the trash bag down the trash chute.
" Great, I seriously need a drink after all of this, you wanna come Loona? " Lily asked tierdly as she looked at the hellhound.
" Yeah, definitely, I'll call us a taxi. " Loona said with a nod as she and Lily headed towards the elevator together.