The scene is Kenny walking to Cartman's house, it is Friday and today Cartman is suppose to move. Kenny feels like a total wreck, he couldn't get a ounce of sleep, he kept trying to come up with what to say to Cartman. He wanted to tell him how he feels without sounding gay or like a pussy. Kenny looked on and saw what looked like a County Fair.

" Hey Kenny!" Kyle ran up to him happily followed by a frustrated Stan

" Hey Kyle, you've seen Cartman?" asked Kenny

" You mean the fat ass? No. But this a great party, lots of free food, if your feeling better. Oh look a shoot the "Cartman doll" booth" Kyle ran over to the booth over excited

Stan looks on " Kyle, god damn it." he said frustrated with how his best friend was acting

" So is Cartman in his room?" asked Kenny

" Yeah I think so."

Kenny walks up to the Cartman residence and rings the doorbell. Ms. Cartman answers the door.

" Oh, hello Kenny." said Ms. Cartman sounding sweet like she always does

" Is Eric up in his room?"

" Yeah I do believe he is, Poopykins, your little friend is here."

" Send him up mom." said Cartman

" Now Eric come down here and see your little friend, that's rude."

" But Mommmm! I'm too busssyyy to come down." Cartman said in his whiny voice

" Okay Eric. You know the way right dear."

" Yes mam."

Despite being a porn queen, she was very nice; Kenny always thought she was a little attractive, he found one of his dad's magazines and in it she was there posing nude. Kenny even once joked about how hot Cartman's mom was, only to hear " Shut the hell up Kenny!" and then hear laughter from Stan and Kyle. Kenny walked up the stairs to Cartman's room and knocked on the door.

" Come in. (Kenny walks in) Oh hey Kenny." said Cartman looking outside with an angry face, Kenny knew he was looking at Kyle. " So what's up?" Cartman said while turning around

Kenny runs up to Cartman and hugs him.

" K…Kenny! What the hell are you doing?" Cartman said as he pulled Kenny off of him

Kenny stands there for a sec and then takes his hood off and looks at Cartman.

" Eric, I love you, (Cartman looks at him stunned) not in a gay way, in a friend like way. I'm going to miss you."

" Why?" Cartman asked still looking stunned

Kenny turns around, his back facing Cartman. " Because you're my best friend, and I wish you weren't moving to New York."

Kenny is still looking away but Cartman's face now looks confused more then stunned.

" Well, I know everyone has been acting like you moving is a great thing, but it's been killing me the past few days, I haven't been able sleep, eat, or enjoy anything since I heard you were moving, well anyway, I just wanted you to know how I feel and that you will be missed, if only by me. Still. That's all I wanted to say." Kenny said trying not to let himself cry

Cartman looks completely confused now.

" But… Kenny didn't you (BANG a loud noise interrupted Cartman) Oh what now!"

Cartman looks outside to see some fireworks exploding in the Sky.

" Why that little fuc!in ass Jew, look Kenny I'm ( Cartman turns around but Kenny isn't there anymore)"

Kenny runs downstairs; he didn't want to give Cartman the chance to rip on him, not when he was feeling like this. He ran of the house and wiped his face of the few tears that escaped. Then he walked over to Stan and Kyle.

" Hey Kenny." the boys said together

" Hey guys" replied Kenny sounding sad

" What wrong Kenny? You look horrible." said Kyle

" Yeah you still sick?" asked Stan

Just then Chef appeared.

" Hello children." said Chef

" Hey Chef." said Stan and Kyle together

" Hey Chef." said Kenny sounding sad

" Kenny did you talk to Cartman?" asked Chef

" Yeah."

" How did it go?"

" Okay I guess."

" Don't worry Kenny, Cartman is leaving today ( singing) He's leaving he's leaving." sang Kyle

Kenny looks angry.

" OH STOP IT KYLE!" Stan screams

" What?"

" Quit acting like a dick."

" But Stan…Its Cartman."

" Even so, you don't act like a ass hole, your acting like Cartman would act. Just because he acts the way he does, that doesn't give you the right to when he's leaving."

" Yeah Kyle, you need to remember, sure Eric can be a jack ass, but think of his lifestyle. He's fat, doesn't have a dad, is made fun of constantly because he is overweight and is mom is a crack whore, so when he makes fun of people it isn't as bad if a regular person did it. If Eric was skinny, had a dad, and his mom was descent and he still made fun of people like he does now everyone would probably try and kill." said Chef

" Hm, your right Chef, in fact I just learned something just now, even if Cartman is an ass hole that doesn't mean I can act like one, I became the very thing I hate, and that's not me, I should be the bigger person and actually wish him farewell." said Kyle

" I've been saying that…UHG!…( Stan calms down) well whatever, at least your back to normal Kyle." Stan said

Cartman comes out of his house. He at first looks pissed but then his face changes to look delighted.

" Well, I know you all came to mock the hell out of me, ( everyone looks at Cartman) but I got big news for you all. I'M NOT MOVING! ( Everyone looks stunned) Nyah nyah nyah nyah I'm not moving nyah nyah." said Cartman

" You said you were leaving fat ass." screamed Kyle

" Yeah Cartman, that was a dirty trick." said Stan

" I didn't trick you." said Cartman

" I believe I can explain" a voice says

Ms. Cartman comes out of nowhere.

" Cartman's mom, gasp" someone says

(Melodramatic music plays) DUM DUM dum dum

" What the fuc! was that?" asks Cartman looking, wondering where the music came from

" Well anyway, we were going to move but not anymore. It turns out the guy who hired me only hired me because I slept with him." said Liane

" Now who didn't see that coming." said Jimbo

" MOMM!" said Cartman

" What poopykins?" said Liane

" Don't say that."

" Sorry hun."

Cartman walks over to the boys.

" So you're not moving?" said Kenny

" Yeah, I called you last night, but your dad said you still weren't feeling well and he said he would tell you I'm not moving." said Cartman

Kenny stares at his dad.

" Well I forgot, wrestling was on last night." said Mr. McKormick

" Ugh, I'm glad your not moving Eric." said Kenny

" Me too, since now I can do this." said Cartman

Cartman walks over to the hose on the side of his house, and picks it up.

" Well since now this is still our place, here is something I've been meaning to say" (everyone looks puzzled) " Get the hell off my PROPERTAH!"

Cartman lets the hose off on everyone; people are screaming due to the freezing coldness of the water, the only ones not sprayed are Kenny, Chef, Stan, and Cartman's mom.

" Ha ha hah haah hah ah ha!" Cartman laughed, a evil laugh

The hose stops and everyone who got sprayed is gone except Kyle. Kyle walks up to the others looking angry.

" Nice… to have you back fat ass…(he's really angry but figures this is his punishment) if you excuse me I'm freezing my ass off." said Kyle

" Ha ha, serves you right ass hole." says Cartman

" Come on dude, let's get you changed and then we can all go to Shaky's, my treat." said Stan

The boys are leaving but Cartman drags behind.

" Kenny." said Cartman

" Yeah Eric." said Kenny

" What you said back there, um, (Cartman looks down at the ground) …I can't believe I'm gonna say this… I …love you too, as a FRIEND. Okay and thanks for saying you'd miss me. That's all."

Kenny walks over to Cartman, puts his hand on his shoulder.

" Thanks Eric."

Cartman grabs his friend's parka and holds a fist to his head.

" If you ever tell anyone I said that, I swear to freakin god that I will fuc!in kill you, I will kill you and make you eat your parents."

" Okay I wont tell anyone Cartman, (Cartman lets him go) except Kyle and Stan ha hah."

" What Kenny no, no Kenny…(chasing Kenny) that s a bad Kenny."

Kenny though to himself this is too fun.

The scene is the boy's classroom and it's Monday.

" Well Class I graded your reports."

She walks up to Kenny and Cartman.

" So I'm a bitch ay."

The boys laughed, followed by the whole class laughing.

" Okay then how about a weeks suspension?"

She turns around and walks to her desk; Cartman and Kenny cover their mouths to hide their laughter.

" Stupid bitch." Cartman whispers

" Yeah." agreed Kenny

Cartman changed the part about how they enjoyed the suspension to that it was the worst and most horrible thing that ever happened to them so that Kenny would get another free day, a sort of gift to his friend, now they would both get a whole week off.

" That was pretty clever of me right Ken, man good thing I decided to add that last part before I gave it to you to turn on Thursday."

Kenny wasn't listening, all he could think about was the five days he would get to spend with his best friend on whatever they wanted, it was going to be awesome.

" Man I can't believe we get a whole week, what does she really think we be doing anyway, she is such a stupid bitch." Cartman said in a low tone of voice, he turned to Kenny

" Yeah dude, she is a stupid bitch." said Kenny happily

He was the luckiest kid alive.