Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi vs Limp Bizkit Chapter 8: Hi! My name is, a hi hi puffy ami yumi fanfic

Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi vs. Limp Bizkit

Chapter 7: Hi! My name is…

The next day, Kaz, Ami, and Yumi arrived at the Los Angeles Airport (LAX). They got their bags and waited for a Flatbed truck that carried their bus. As they got their bus, they drove to Hollywood unaware that Limp Bizkit was following right behind them in their tour bus. Before the girls look for Slick Shady, they checked in at Comfort Suite. As for Limp Bizkit, they parked outside the hotel waiting for them to show up.

"Alright, guys." Fred said to the band, "Listen the fuck up. We are going to trick those two sluts and their faggot manager by any means necessary. First: Sam, you are going to dress up like that dude in the information booth that tells tourist where to find their favorite celebrities. Wes, you are going to dress up as a tour guide for Ami and Yumi. DJ and John, you guys are going to be tourist watching those two idiots. Got it?"

"Yeah, we got it." Wes said.

"Hey, wait a minute Fred!" DJ said. "What about you?"

"I'm going inside their bus to find anything important and their hotel suite. Luckily, I brought along my pet dogs Bizkit and Phoenix. (Dog whistles) Come here, Bizkit and Phoenix."

Bizkit and Phoenix enter the room. They were both bulldogs of Fred Durst. Bizkit wears Fred's red ski hat while Phoenix wears Fred's New York Yankees black baseball cap.

"Uh, why did you bring your two dogs?" John questioned.

"Because those two sluts have cats. Their names are…uh…hey Sam, what's the name of Yumi's cat?"

"Jeng Kang." Sam answered.

"Yeah and the other girl, Ami, her cat's name is…Tek…uh…Tek…uh."

"Tekirai."

"Yeah. Look, I don't know how to say these dumb ass Japanese names. Let's just get to work."

The band got out of the bus and split up to their destination point. Sam Rivers went to the nearest Info booth to speak with a male employee.

"Uh, excuse me?" Sam said to the info guy, "Can you tell me where I can find the Staples Center?"

"Yeah," said the info guy, "It's down that street and to the…"

"Can you just come out and show me?"

The info guy gets out of the booth and says while pointing directions, "It's down that way and…UGH!"

Before he can finish, Sam delivered a karate chop to his neck and the guy was knocked out unconscious as he fell to the hot pavement. Sam dragged his body to an alley and took his clothes off. He removed his original clothes and put on the info guy's clothing. To complete his disguise, he puts a fake mustache and hair on. Sam took out some duck tape and tied the guy's legs, arms, and mouth to make sure nobody hears him or see him.

Sam takes out his cell phone and calls Fred.

"Yo Fred!" Sam said. "I got the booth."

"Good!" Fred said. "Put your phone in your pocket and connect it with your headset. I'll tell you what to do. I got a spy sonic ear, binoculars, and I'll be watching your every move from the bus."

"Alright Fred!"

"Hold on! Those two sluts are coming to you right now! Act natural!"

Sam acted calm as he saw Puffy AmiYumi approaching. Ami begins talking to a disguised Sam Rivers.

(The words like this are being spoken by Fred via headset microphone to Sam)

"Um excuse me?" Ami said to Sam.

"Hello!" Sam said. "How may I help you?"

"Yeah, we need info on a guy named Slick Shady."

Tell them that you don't know who he is!

"I don't know who he is."

"You don't?" Yumi said raising eyebrow. "But don't you have all the info of all celebrities?"

Tell them that you do but you don't have Slick!

"I do but I don't have Slick."

"Well, don't you have anything that might lead us to Slick?"

Tell them that there is a way and you can give them a tour!

"There is a way and I can give you a tour of Hollywood."

"Really?" Ami said.

"Yes."

"(In Japanese) YAY!" Ami cheered. "Isn't this great Yumi? A tour of Hollywood and we might be able to see Leo!"

"Yeah!" Yumi said as she rolled her eyes.

"Leo sucks." Sam said under his breath.

"Wait a minute?" Ami said suspiciously to Sam. "You look kind of familiar? Did we meet before?"

"Uh no." Sam said nervously.

"Say, do you know Limp Bizkit?"

Tell them yes!

"Yes."

"Are you one of the band members?"

Say no!

"Uh…no. I use to be their roadie until I got kicked out."

"What did you do?"

"Uh…"

Think of something jackass!

"I was at a party at the Playboy mansion when Larry Flynt and the Hustler staff came in. They drugged our drinks and…uh…I drank one of them and…uh…I remember I woke up and I found out that I…had sex…with…uh…Fred's mother."

Ami and Yumi stared in complete silence with their jaws dropped. As for Fred, who heard it from Sam by his headset, had his mouth dropped and eyes wide opened. The binoculars that he held in his hand dropped from his lose grip and shattered.

"Uh, can we have our tickets for our tour?" Yumi said breaking the silence.

"Yeah, take these." Sam said giving them the tickets. "Take it to the tourist center over at the street corner."

Ami and Yumi walked off to the tourist spot. As they left, Sam spoke to Fred on his headset.

"Yo Fred!" Sam said. "Phase 1 completed. (Silence). Fred, Are you there?"

"Sam." Fred said slowly. "I'm gonna kill you one of these days."

Fred contacts Wes by his cell phone.

"Hey Wes!" Fred said. "Did you do your job?"

At the tourist center, Wes Borland was disguised as a tour guide.

"Yup." Wes replied on the other end. "I took the liberty of hiding my identity as a tour guide."

"Good. Now tell DJ and John to go with you. They have to watch those two bitches as they ride along."

"Alright, I see them coming. I'll call you back. (Hangs up the phone) Hey DJ and John! Show time!"

The three got behind a counter of the tour center. DJ and John were disguised as Hispanic tourists. Ami and Yumi arrived at the center and got in line behind John and DJ unaware that they are in disguised and so is Wes.

"Thank you and have a nice day." Wes said to DJ and John as the left for the tour bus outside and talks to Ami and Yumi. "May I help you ladies?"

"Yes we would like a tour of Hollywood." Ami said.

"Got tickets?"

"Yes! They are right here."

Ami gives Wes the tickets.

"Ok." Wes said. "Here's your map, get on the bus, and I'll be right there."

"Thank you." Ami said cheerfully.

"Your welcome. Have a nice day."

Ami and Yumi left for the bus. Wes went to bathroom and started laughing to himself.

"HAHAHAHAHA!" Wes laughed. "WHAT A BUNCH OF MORONS! HAHAHAHAHAHA! (Stops laughing and calls Fred by cell) Hey Fred! Phase 2 completed."

"Awesome work." Fred said. "I'm on their private bus and man, they have worthless shit in this place."

"What about their faggot manager?"

"Oh. I tied him up in Yumi's room. Man, is she gonna be pissed. I'm still trashing the place so I can find anything important."

"Ok. Did you find anything at all?"

"Just a minute."

Fred opens Ami and Yumi's panty dresser. He takes out Ami's, that is the one with the flower, and Yumi's which is the one with the skull. He brings Ami's to his face and takes a big sniff at it. He breathes out in a refreshed way.

"Hmm." Fred said. "Too cute."

He takes Yumi's and sniffs it. He stops and coughs violently.

"Yuck." Fred said disappointed. "Too disgusting but I like it."

"Uh Fred?" Wes said on his cell.

"Huh?" Fred replied, "Oh, just take the girls to that one person who used to be my homie."

"Ok. I'll see ya."

Wes got on the bus. Ami and Yumi had the left front seat while DJ and John sat behind them. The bus was filled with at least 30 tourist from around the world and some that came from the states. Wes started the engine and the bus took off to the homes and mansions of the Hollywood stars. Wes starts talking on his bus microphone as the bus drove from street to street of Hollywood.

"On your left is Britney Spears mansion." Wes said. "To the right is Brad Pitt's house."

"Look Yumi." Ami said cheerfully. "It's Brad Pitt's house."

"Get real Ami." Yumi said with her arms crossed. "We're not here for gorgeous hunks. We're here for Slick Shady."

"Slick Shady?" Wes questioned.

"Yes, do you know where he is?"

"Yeah. I know he is. He lives right there."

Wes pointed to a two-floor mansion on the left.

"Are you sure that's where he lives?" Yumi asked Wes.

"Yes, that where he lives." Wes lied.

"Come on, Ami." Yumi said. "It's time for some payback."

"Hold on sec." Wes said. "If you want to jump on Slick, you better fool him with this."

Wes reaches into his pocket and takes a $50.00 bill. He gives them to Ami and Yumi. Wes stops the bus and lets the girl band out.

"Thanks for the ride." Ami said to Wes and blows him a kiss.

Wes blushes and says, "Oh shucks! Your welcome."

He drives off to continue with the tour. Ami and Yumi got into a huddle to lure Slick out and attack him by surprise. Their plan was to put the money on his front door step, ring the bell, and pounce on him while hiding in the bushes near the door. Yumi puts the bill on the door and rings the bell. Ami and Yumi hid quickly in the bushes. They tried to hide their snickering as they heard the door being opened.

"Hey what's this?" said a voice, "Cool! It's money."

"NOW!" Yumi yelled.

"WHAT THE FU…"

Ami and Yumi jumped out of the bushes and began to beat who they thought was Slick Shady. Ami begins punching his face while Yumi was kicking his balls. Yumi picked him up and gave him a back breaker. Ami climbs the rain-pipe of the house and jumps off the roof to deliver an elbow drop on the guy's chest. Yumi finishes him off with a Death Valley driver. The two wiped their hands to get off the imaginary dust. The guy was still lying on his stomach while on the ground motionless.

"Well Ami," Yumi said. "We taught him a lesson."

"Yeah." Ami said. "Slick Shady should know better."

"I…I…am not Slick Shady." Said the motionless guy.

The girls turned around to see the guy getting up. To their surprise, it wasn't Slick Shady. The guy was a white man with tattoos on his arms, a bit muscular, short yellow hair, black tank-top, white sneakers, white pants, and earrings. He is…Marshal Mathers, better known as Eminem or Slim Shady.

"What the hell where you two doing?" Eminem questioned.

"We thought this was Slick Shady's house?" Ami said.

"Well this ain't Slick's. This is my house."

"So who are you?"

"Who am I? WHO AM I? Do I got to sing it to you?"

"Uhhh…."

"Damn. I guess I have to sing it again then. Maestro."

Eminem's door opened to reveal D12 as they brought out their music instruments. The music began to play and Eminem starts singing.

My Name is…

Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady

Ahem.. excuse me!
Can I have the attention of the class
for one second?

Hi kids! Do you like violence? (Yeah yeah yeah!)
Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails through each one of my eyelids? (Uh-huh!)
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (Yeah yeah!)
Try 'cid and get fucked up worse that my life is? (Huh?)
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin to get my head straight
but I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate (Ummmm..)
And Dr. Dre said, "Slim Shady you a basehead!"
Uh-uhhh! "So why's your face red? Man you wasted!"
Well since age twelve, I've felt like I'm someone else
Cause I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt
Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off
And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross
I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass
faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast
C'mere slut! (Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog!)
I don't give a fuck, God sent me to piss the world off!

Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady

My English teacher wanted to have sex with me in Junior High
Thanks a lot... next semester, I'll be 35
I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler
and stapled his nuts to a stack of papers (Owwwwwwww!)
Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up
Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup
Extraterrestrial, running over pedestrians
In a space ship while they screamin at me: "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!"
Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
I just found out my mom does more dope than I do (Damn!)
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
Make a record about doin drugs and name it after her (Oh thank you!)
You know you blew up when the women rush your stands
and try to touch your hands like some screamin Usher fans (Aaahhhhhh!)
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph
(Dude, can I get your autograph?)
So I signed it: 'Dear Dave, thanks for the support, ASSHOLE!'

Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady

Stop the tape! This kid needs to be locked away! (Get him!)
Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, OPERATE!
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die (Fuck that!)
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive
(Huh yup!) Am I comin or goin? I can barely decide
I just drank a fifth of vodka -- dare me to drive? (Go ahead)
All my life I was very deprived
I ain't had a woman in years, and my palms are too hairy to hide
(Whoops!) Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk (hachhh-too)
I spit when I talk, I'll fuck anything that walks (C'mere)
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
HOW YOU GONNA BREAST FEED ME MOM? (WAH!)
YOU AIN'T GOT NO TITS! (WAHHH!)
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed
Put a bulletproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (BANG!)
I'm steamin mad (Arrrggghhh!)
And by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah?)
Tell him that I slit his throat, in this dream I had

Hi! My name is.. (what?) My name is.. (who?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady
Hi! My name is.. (huh?) My name is.. (what?)
My name is.. scratches Slim Shady

"Ami," Yumi said, "This is going to be a long night."

Stay tune for Chapter 8: Cats vs. Dogs.