Embracing His True Self

Chapter 53

"Hey, you know where Snape is?" Barty's ears perked up when he heard Rod speaking out in the hallway, "Hey, Rod in here!" Barty called out, shifting a bookmark into the book. He wasn't surprised to see that Rod's brother Rab was with him, they were rarely out of each other's sight. They had not shared the same cell, and both had been alone for over a decade. So to see them spending every second together didn't even make him blink. He too had been alone for over a decade with only Winky and his father for company. He had been stuck in his own mind though, as his body went through the motions. If he could have…he would have murdered his father for what he'd done. Selfish fucking bastard that he was, Barty would have preferred death over that continued existence, not something he had to worry about now thankfully. Frowning in annoyance, he hated thinking about him, but it was inevitable, especially when he interacted with people who had been in Azkaban the entire time. They might think he was lucky…but Barty didn't consider himself so.

"Hi, he's not in here," Rod groaned, shuffling to the seat in the library and gratefully sinking down into it. Thank Merlin, he was aching in places he hadn't known existed. If he wanted to be back to his normal self – the one before Azkaban – he had to work out hard in both mental, physical and magical aspects of his life. he had just been doing all three for two hours straight, with only a minute break to drink something before beginning again. "Why did you shout?" too exhausted to even glare but he was glowering.

Rabastian was pretty much the same, as he too sat down, a pained look on his face.

"Get a House-Elf to do it," Barty informed them, sympathy playing on his face, he knew the feelings all too well. he'd struggled alone with only a few potions – that weren't the right ones for his problems – while playing the part of a damn suspicious Auror. It hadn't been easy but he would be damned if he let his Lord down again. "Leave Snape to work with Harry,"

Rodolphus frowned, "What are you on about?" since when did Barty defend Snape? A lot of the Death Eaters hate the fact he got off while the rest of them ended up in Azkaban. He openly declared his allegiance to the Dark Lord, without reservation, even if it meant serving a life sentence in Azkaban. He had known the Dark Lord would return and would get them out, and his devotion had proven true. The Dark Lord had returned and gotten them out of the hell hole, but to realize he'd spent so long in there had been a shock to the system.

"He's busy, they're busy," Barty absently corrected himself, seeing as they were in the lab, he thought he'd read up, see if he could figure out how to help them. He might not be as smart as the Dark Lord or Harry come to that, but he was no slouch, his grades reflected how determined he'd been to be a good son, a smart son. Not that he had cared, his father barely glanced his way, and that anger began festering, to hatred until he couldn't stand the old man.

"Best way to go with a lockdown," Rab said, "I don't suppose you know the names of any of the Dark Lord's House-elves?"

"Amita!" Barty called out, as Rod slid the book Barty had been reading over to himself, glancing at the title curiously.

"What can Amita do for…" the poor House-Elf didn't get a chance to reply.

"Retrieve two pain relivers mixed with muscle relaxants now!" Rabastian growled out, glaring at the House-elf as if it was something repugnant under his nose.

The poor thing immediately left their sight to do as commanded.

"Good job Harry isn't here," Barty muttered under his breath, and it was true, Rabastian would have found himself in even more pain. Either that or in the process of receiving a mental beatdown by the teenager who had some odd thoughts especially on House-Elves. Barty wouldn't admit it but he was fond of them too, especially Winky who had taken care of him and genuinely cared for him throughout his childhood into his adulthood.

"He has problems with everything we do," Rodolphus scowled darkly, it was a wonder they were breathing right, the teen was getting way to big for his dragonhide boots and he didn't understand why the Dark Lord didn't put him in his place.

Barty stared at Rodolphus for a few moments, barely glancing at the House-Elf when she returned and left again having dropped off her demanded to receive items. "You can't honestly say you'd prefer things the way they were? Do you?" Barty eventually asked, his tone low, he definitely didn't want to be overheard especially by the Dark Lord. "I mean towards the end," when things were looking really fucking grim. The Dark Lord had gone off the rails, their plans just completely evaporating into thin air, all the Dark Lord had obsessed over was the prophecy.

Rodolphus sighed as the potion began to work, rubbing his forehead as he actually thought on Barty's words. "Potter has nothing to do with the Dark Lord's current state." He denied.

"You didn't hear or see him before Harry was brought here," Barty explained, eyes shadowed, "I will follow our Lord…to whatever end, and was doing so back then. Now, for the first time in a long, long time, we're back on track Rod, we actually have a shot at winning, he's no longer obsessing about that damn prophecy, his mind is back," Rodolphus was probably still smarting from being genuinely afraid of Harry. Whatever he'd said at the party had gotten to Rodolphus, he'd get over it.

"Was it that bad?" Rabastian asked, a frown on his own dark features. He liked Harry, his brother wasn't quite sure what to make of him, and the threats yesterday didn't help matters much. Rodolphus liked Luna Lovegood, obsessive might be the better word…the urge to go out and check on her was strong for his brother. Not that he'd get near her if what Harry said was true, they'd moved into Longbottom manor which was under the Fidelius Charm.

Barty nodded grimly, it was the truth, and how nobody else could see it was beyond him. Then again only he and Pettigrew had seen the Dark Lord before he had his looks and mind back. He wasn't sure what the Dark Lord had done, and frankly he didn't care as long as it was good for them.

"Damn," Rabastian mused thoughtfully, stretching out now that his entire body didn't hurt like blazes. "Do you know how long the lockdown is going to last for?" he rather hoped it wasn't until Dumbledore was found, that was for damn certain, they might be here for a while. "I hate being cooped up," after Azkaban though this place was amazing, it didn't mean he wanted to be stuck in one place too long.

"We're always having to stay hidden," Rodolphus muttered distastefully, "The day the Dark Lord wins cannot come quick enough," he would give anything to be able to wander around Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade during the day, to see all the changes and what had remained the same. Unfortunately if he wanted to go, he'd need to do so under the cover of darkness, and that was when the shops were closed and absolutely no use for him to go then. He was grateful for Owl order, it meant he could buy what he liked, when he liked, but he would honestly prefer to go there himself and purchase something. He knew mentally it would be a let-down, not as big as his imagination was thinking it…but he didn't care.

"Sooner than you think," Barty replied, thinking of earlier that morning, people didn't have the capacity to surprise him often. Yet Harry had genuinely, deeply surprised him and touched him. Add to the fact that the Dark Lord had given him a gift, a present for his birthday it blew his freaking mind. seeing how everyone else had reacted to the snake – which Harry had returned to its original size – had also been hilarious, everyone was giving him a wide berth suddenly.

"Do you know something I don't?" Rodolphus' eyes widened with hope.

"Harry's close to a breakthrough on his potion," Barty informed them, eyes gleaming in delight, the thought of actually going out into the magical world without fear of detection was liberating to say the least. He didn't doubt for a second that Harry would get the potion working, he worked miracles. The potion for them all had been…blessing, it enabled them to recover much easier and smoothly. Easier was an understatement, it would have taken months, if not at least a year for them to recover from the damages Azkaban had wrought to their bodies.

"He's working on a potion?" Rabastian questioned curiously, he hadn't had an idea and he'd been watching the teen closely. He didn't approach him too often, and never in a friendship capacity despite the fact he wanted it. Harry was friends with the Longbottom child, a boy they had left an orphan that night. That and his brother and father were wary of him, they didn't know what the hell to think. Yet, the fact Harry didn't forbid anything from happening between Luna and Rod spoke volumes. He must trust Rod enough to protect Luna.

"He is," Barty answered enthusiastically, waiting impatiently for them to ask.

"Why would it affect us?" Rodolphus finally asked the question.

"Because of what he's creating…" Barty replied, outwardly calm, centred and controlled. "He's creating a potion that will in essence make the drinker a Metamorphamagus. Just think about it…taking that potion will make you completely safe." Except if someone did a blood test on him, that would have their true identities revealed, but only Gringotts did those tests.

"That's why you brought in the witch," Rodolphus said, understanding dawning, he and Rabastian had seen him returning with her just before everyone began to Apparate into Slytherin Manor for the lockdown. 'and didn't kill her' was thought even if not explicitly stated.

"Well I'm hoping it will help him," Barty shrugged his shoulders, he didn't really care if it did or not, unless it helped him succeed. Either way it was another Order member off the streets and less likely to kill them.

"She won't be helping anyone, none, when Bellatrix finds out," Rodolphus snorted derisively, "She hates her sister and the fact she had a kid with someone who isn't pure." Anything to cause any pain to Andromeda who Bellatrix felt betrayed by, giving up everything she loved about herself. The Black family, the pureblood ways, making the line impure, well as so much as Bellatrix could care about anyone. Quite honestly, Bellatrix could kill Narcissa even, without so much as batting an eyelash.

Bellatrix had not only now been divorced, but she was holding onto her Black name with the skin of her teeth. If she did anything out of line…they all knew Harry would disown her completely. Bellatrix only had a single vault to her name now, with the probability of replenished funds every month highly unlikely. She had no home, unless she rented somewhere. They pitted the fools who came across her, she was unstable, and quite frankly, a danger to herself and others. It had been Rodolphus' job to keep her contained…now he was free of those restrictions.

"No, I'm sure Harry will think of something, he's not stupid enough to think for a second she's safe down there." Barty said flippantly, that book of Harry's that he's constantly toting around had a whole plethora of spells within it, spells he'd created over the past five years beginning from his first year. Spell crafting was usually a Prince trait, but Harry was definitely not a Prince.

"Rolf, can you imagine if the potion works?" Rabastian said reverently, "We could have our lives back," when the Dark Lord took over – however he was going to do it – they could live their lives, properly without the constant fear their names caused and the distrust and the potential and unwelcoming attacks for what they'd done to the Longbottoms.

"No," Rodolphus whispered with a pained grimace, "Not everything," they would be losing their last name, the Lestrange name…and it was a legacy that would end when their father died especially if they changed it.

Rabastian frowned, figuring out quite quickly what his brother was referring to. They had done that, reduced the Lestrange name – which was already in bad shape – and made it something of an insult, something disgusting to have or admit to having the Lestrange bloodline. Their father could say he didn't blame them until they were all blue in the face, but the times they'd mentioned reactions and such, their father had such a broken down and hurt look on his face. He'd spent decades trying to revive their name, elevate it. unfortunately, there was nothing he could do now, the second he and his brother were caught…that was it. The name was completely tarnished, nothing short of a miracle would revive it.

"You could still use the Lestrange name…I know it wouldn't be the direct line unless you want to play your own sons?" they reused names often enough that it was doable, and there were spells to change things, although whether it would be fool proof he did not know.

"I am not portraying myself as a seventeen year old kid," Rodolphus sneered, the curled lip saying more than even his words, he found that entirely disdainful. Although it certainly would making his approaching Luna easier… the sneaky thought at the back of his mind insisted. He absolutely refused to do such a thing, no, after Bellatrix…he might want something different but he didn't want an entire deception and lie based life. He wanted her to like him for him, and wasn't that strange? He'd liked Bellatrix, she was pretty in her own way…but the feelings he had for Luna…they encompassed anything he thought he was capable of feeling.

"Not even to keep your name?" Barty asked, in genuine surprise. As much as he loathed his father he was proud of his name too, so he could see where they were coming from.

"Not even then," Rodolphus insisted, it was a pipedream he knew that, there was no way someone as beautiful, young and smart as Luna Lovegood – and she was smart easily the smartest Ravenclaw at Hogwarts at the moment according to the test results – would want anything to do with a washed up Azkaban escapee who had been put there for 'heinous crimes' against fellow wizards and being a Death Eater. Harry Potter had come around though, surely if he could…then it was entirely conceivable that Luna too could come around? His mind drifted to the last time he'd seen her, making food in the kitchen, humming under her breath. She couldn't have known it but she was making his favourite food in the entire world. Food he hadn't had in over fifteen years, being on a strict diet really sucked sometimes. Yet, the results would be more than worth it.

"Would you wish to go back to being a teenager?" Rabastian pointed out to Barty, but then again he might have a hope in hell of fitting in unlike them.

"Are you kidding? It would be awesome!" Barty grinned roguishly at them.

Rabastian snorted in amusement, shaking his head, 'only Barty' was his thoughts. Only Barty would want to 'pretend' to be a teenager again, the thought horrified both him and his brother. They'd hated being teenagers last time around…and this time would probably be no different. People never took you seriously when you were young, it was entirely vexing to say the least.

"Then you're welcome to do it," Rodolphus said, shuddering anew at the prospect, the only way he would do it is if someone – the Dark Lord – forced his hand. Even then he'd be tempted to put up a token of protest, just to show he wasn't happy about it. Well, with the way the Dark Lord was now he would, before never in a million years. Perhaps Barty was right…perhaps Harry did have a significant role in the Dark Lord's return to sanity.

"Wait…isn't it Potter's birthday today?" Rodolphus blurted out, after a few moments of silence. He was sure he had heard someone mutter something like 'Happy Birthday' to the boy last night. Although in truth it might be the drink distorting what he'd heard completely.

Rabastian blinked rapidly, "Is it?" before saying, "It is," 'seventh month dies' the Dark Lord had demanded to know of any child born during that time. Harry and Neville were the only two that fit the bill, the dark sect had been beyond terrified during that time, praying their significant others wouldn't have their heir on or around that particular date. They knew exactly what the Dark Lord intended to do.

And as much as they abhorred the idea, they would follow their lord loyally, as they had sworn to do.

"The Dark Lord bought him a gift," Barty said, eyes gleaming as he watched their reactions, which was worth it. Jaws drooping, denial swarming their eyes, as they bugged out. This was from pureblood's who had been taught from a young age not to show emotion.

"You lie," Rodolphus whispered, knowing deep down that Barty wasn't lying he just couldn't believe it.

"He bought him a snake," Barty said, his savage glee unhidden, he'd made them actually show their true feelings. It didn't happen often so of course, he was going to milk it for all it was worth. These memories were worth viewing again at a later date, the only other real time he had of such a thing wasn't worthy of remembrance. The day they were sentenced to Azkaban for life.

"What is it with that boy?" Rodolphus whispered in shock, his face shuttering as he regained control of himself, glaring a little at Barty for making him show his true feelings. He was genuinely baffled, why on earth would the Dark Lord desire to buy him anything? He had nothing to prove to anyone, he was the most powerful wizard in the magical world.

And if rumour was to be believed…Harry Potter was likened to the Dark Lord's equal. The prophecy, the Dark Lords' words and actions. The feeling of that powerful magic from what he'd seen so far. It wasn't a rumour, it was just pain facts.

"Given the way the Dark Lord looked at Harry Potter last night…we might find ourselves with a consort," Rabastian whispered quietly, speaking mostly to himself but sharing his beliefs with his brother and Barty. "The Dark Lord's consort," showing once again that the Lestrange's weren't just muscle, but they were smart, smarter than a lot of the Dark Lord's followers. After all Voldemort didn't just take on mediocre he looked for the best and brightest, especially in pureblood's but would take on a few half-blood's if he believed they were worthy of his cause.

Rodolphus choked on thin air, staring at his brother in stunned disbelief, "No way!" that wasn't possible, sure their Lord was far from celibate but to think after all these years to take on a consort? Especially if that person was Harry Potter? A boy who was still considered the epitome of good and lightness? "The Dark Lord does not share power," and that's fundamentally what a consort would do.

"What did you see?" Barty asked, a funny look on his face as he stared intently at Rabastian. Unlike him and Rodolphus if anyone had seen something it would have been Rabastian, he'd had a vantage point to where Harry' revealed himself along with Severus.

"Desire, possessiveness, and want." Rabastian stated steadily, after a few moments pause to gather his thoughts.

"Doesn't mean he'll take the boy as his consort," Rodolphus pointed out, he'd never taken one, he had lovers he used and discarded for Merlin's sake. If anything the boy would become another notch on the Dark Lord's bedpost, the only difference was the Dark Lord's looks…which had deteriorated by the end of the last war with the rituals he was using on himself. He was worse when he returned though for a while.

"The fact he's waiting, giving gifts, showing him respect…" Barty mused out loud, "Damn I didn't see that coming," realization hitting him, Rabastian was right. He wondered if anyone even came close to the same realization they just had. Nothing better happen to Harry now during lockdown or any other time…otherwise that person would wish for death decades before it was finally granted.

"Oh, come on!" Rodolphus almost, almost spluttered. This was insanity. "There's no evidence, none!" they were getting ahead of themselves surely? But how Harry was acting…what the Dark Lord had said…something inside of him told him it was true.

"I suppose there's not," Barty conceded, just gifts, parties, and a possessive Dark Lord apparently.

If they had seen the meeting that was happening down the hall in a few hours…they would have immediately all been in agreement.

Only Fenrir was gifted with the sight of the two.

His laughter once he emerged scared the hell out of everyone in the vicinity.

Promise the next chapter will be long with Tonks/Harry scene and the promised Fenrir/Voldemort/Harry scene...will Harry perfect the potion? Will I make it about a year before Luna comes into the story - seems like a long time I know but time skips and all...which will happen obviously! I guess you'd also like to see more Dumbledore and what he's up to or will Harry give in and let them use the map to catch Dumbledore in the act at Hogwarts? Or will they be in touch with Lucius allowing them to do both without giving up the map? Read and Review please