Embracing His True Self

I edited the last chapter, mostly the 'Muggle' drug that was chosen, a guest reviewer pointed out a mistake I'd made and suggested a few others that were man-made and so I've changed it 😊 you all know how much I detest mistakes so yeah, it's been changed.

Chapter 67

"Master Harry must wake up!" Dobby called out in his normal squeaky voice that all House-elves seemed to have. "Master Harry, Master Dark Lord demands your presence at breakfast." He continued to talk to him, rousing Harry from his rest, trying not to cause the same reaction last night had. The urge to clean up his Masters bed, which was strewn with books and paper was strong, but his Master Harry didn't like that. Only with permission his Master had said, and so with twitchy fingers, he refrained.

Harry groaned pathetically, opening a single eye to glare at the perpetrator behind his interrupted sleep.

"Master Dark Lord want's you up for breakfast," Dobby said, almost weakly, the glare on Harry's face would have any wizard fearing for their lives. Dobby knew however, that his Harry Potter would never purposely or consciously hurt him.

Harry reclosed his eyes and pouted, sighing softly, "I'll be right up," he told Dobby, before sitting up, very reluctantly. He felt like he had just dozed off, glancing back at his pillow as Dobby popped away, indecipherably grumbling, he got out of bed, successfully managing to prevent spilling his books and parchment everywhere. The manor already warm so that he didn't feel cold as he dressed much slower than normal still tried and lethargic. He could have taken a pepper-up draught, but instead chose to head up for breakfast, he was starving despite his sleep deprived state. "Dobby I need you to watch over the video playing on the laptop, and inform me of anything pertaining to the Order and any food that's being prepared for it."

He summoned his journal, lips twitching in a feral sense of satisfaction, he'd done it. On his own without aid, now all he had to do was test it, and he'd rather not use the Longbottom's as the test subjects. This was meant to be a gift for Neville, a thank you for being his friend…so perhaps that they could part ways on at least marginally friendly terms.

"Dobby will do that," Dobby agreed, luckily he'd been around while Harry was working it all and knew what Harry meant.

Harry nodded, before moving, he was pretty damn confident that the potion would work, his potion would work to repair and rejuvenate the body at a cellular level. Like stem cells, blood, the brain even the heart, Harry wouldn't be all that surprised if they looked a decade young after taking the potion as well. In fact he felt utterly stupid for not thinking of it sooner, but who would have thought a simple potion to get rid of spots of all things would give him what he needed to save the Longbottoms? Albeit in a greater dose of course and not for getting rid of spots.

Within five minutes he was wandering into the grand hall, where everyone was already eating breakfast.

"Finally up?" Voldemort asked, staring at Harry in silent contemplation, seeing just how haggard he was beneath his general appearance.

"Finally would imply I actually got any sleep," Harry grumbled, as he moved towards his seat, which was as always right next to Voldemort. Everyone there was used to Harry's attitude and the fact he showed little no submission to the Dark Lord and no longer reacted to it. Plus, it had dawned on them that the Dark Lord seemed to gain amusement from it.

Barty, Rabastan, Rodolphus, Lucius and Severus all choked in mid bite or drink. Their mind immediately conjuring up things they did not wish to think about, and assuming things they definitely had no right assuming.

"What exactly caught your attention last night that had you up all night?" Voldemort asked, throwing his followers a look that said he was unimpressed with their decorum. Oh, he knew what they were thinking, it didn't take a genius – which was exactly what he was – to figure it out. They needed to get their minds out of the gutter, if and when he and Harry were together, they wouldn't be any the wiser.

Harry handed over the journal at the appropriate page, everyone there recognized it as Harry's personal grimoire, and not the Potter one which was no doubt in the Potter vaults at Gringotts. Harry's was just a cheap journal, evidently he hadn't gotten around to using the one the Lestrange's had gifted him. Which was dragon-hide leather with the Potter coat of arms engraved in a large glossy gold coating, with never ending pages and more appropriate for such things than the current one. The one the Lestrange's had gifted him had also been spelled so nobody could read it once Harry's blood was pressed onto the rune to activate it.

Harry's one was just one of the many things Dudley Dursley had discarded because it wasn't what he wanted. Harry had begun using it, and had not stopped, unfortunately, it was full now, and wouldn't be used for further ideas. Except to figure out the potions and spell ideas he already had in here that were currently unfinished, and there wasn't a lot of them.

"Why aren't you using the one we gave you?" Rabastan asked, sounding rather offended, staring at the plain muggle journal turned grimoire as if it had personally affronted him.

"I've actually been writing my successful spells, potions and runes into it," Harry told him, lips twitching, sometimes pureblood's were so easily offended. Then again, he knew just how expensive the gift actually was, and how much it cost to imbue it with the spells. He wasn't used to getting gifts, especially pricey ones, after his childhood and Hermione and Ron, children as they were, couldn't afford anything expensive. "Once it's complete I'll burn this one, I prefer my writing now anyway, it's really bad in those ones,"

"Understandable, you hadn't used a Quill before entering Hogwarts," Severus replied dryly, even he hadn't, and he detested his own writing at the age of eleven, even at sixteen-years-old actually. He'd always had a sort of spidery scrawl. Despite his conversation he was having, he was eyeing the journal, wondering what Harry had managed to complete this time. If it had been anyone else, he would have been over their shoulder checking it out himself or snatching it to see for himself. Unfortunately for him, there was only two others here who truly appreciated and understood potions and the Dark Lord was one of them, Harry obviously the other. To think he could have been educating him from the age of eleven…how would he be now if this sort of genius had been uncovered?

"You figured it out," Voldemort said, his tone filled with pride.

"Wait, you knew, My Lord?" Barty asked, staring at the wizard in surprise, startled.

Harry just smirked, he'd suspected from the start that Voldemort knew or at least suspected what was missing. He was crazy smart, and those who underestimated him deserved what Voldemort gave them.

"I did," Voldemort drawled as he rolled his eyes and gave the journal to Severus, who had permission to read everything within. That spoke of a deep trust between the pair, that had only been fashioned once both had been freed of the shackles Dumbledore had kept them in. Severus had admittedly known the boy well, and it had helped them gain his loyalty in the long run. Not that it had taken much in all honesty.

"You aren't pissed?" Barty actually had the audacity to ask in the Dark Lord's presence, not sure whether he was impressed or shocked by the fact that the Dark Lord had allowed Harry to continue trying to decipher it without letting him in on what it was.

"I was probably this close to asking," Harry admitted, showing how close he was using his thumb and forefinger. "But yeah, I knew," he just didn't want to give in and ask, he'd wanted to figure it out on his own. Then there was the fact he wasn't used to asking for anything, and Voldemort was probably hoping he would ask in order to make him realize he could ask for help and receive it. That they weren't like Dumbledore and McGonagall and wouldn't deny him.

"This is…very well done," Severus admitted, shaking his head, unable to believe he hadn't thought of it, pretty much going through the same process that Harry did last night.

"Now to test it," Harry mused, "And I'm not allowed to approach St. Mungo's," throwing Voldemort an exasperated look as he said it. Voldemort had forbidden in, due to what Luna had seen, and quite frankly…after learning the length Dumbledore had been willing to go in order to get him back…he didn't want to risk another vial of that potion still being in play. So, he had no qualms about playing it safe.

"I have a few contacts that might be willing to test it for you," Severus admitted, healing and potions intersected on a lot of different platforms. Plus, there were many who had gone into healing only to end up gaining their second masteries in potions and ended up creating for St. Mungo's.

"Can they be trusted though?" Harry asked, he didn't want some asshole claiming his work as their own after all. This sort of potion could see you becoming a multi-galleon-aire. It would be a great temptation for anyone, perhaps too much of one. Not that he'd be giving the recipe away, but if one was smart enough, they'd be able to recreate it given enough time.

"They won't be trusted, they will be giving me an oath before anything changes hands," Severus replied sternly, he was more suspicious and cautious than Harry, if that was possible. No, he wouldn't be giving Harry's creation to just anyone, and would prevent any potential thievery.

"They'd need to use someone who's been affected by the Cruciatus exposure as long as the Longbottom's," Harry mused thoughtfully, "It's the only way to guarantee it, using someone who hasn't been exposed as long might end up with disappointment on all ends." He wasn't going to give Neville hope only for it to be snatched from him.

"Agreed," Severus replied, nodding his head. "I'll get in touch with them this morning, see if they're available." Potion Masters weren't the most sociable creatures, many went into that profession because they didn't want to be around people and preferred solitude.

Harry nodded, brow wrinkling, "I don't know when I'll be able to brew it though," it was going to be a very unsurprisingly, difficult potion to brew. The stages were delicate and time consuming, but thankfully would only take two days to complete. Finishing something theoretically wasn't the same as completing the physical challenges that the potion would provide. "With everything else that's going on."

"It will be a tight fit," Severus agreed, "But it should be doable, I will help if you'd like." Eager to test it himself, and it was nothing to do with his desire to 'help' as much as it was to just try to brew it himself. He'd just completed his own new potion, so he had nothing to do, and this was a challenging potion that he really wanted to see if he could complete first time.

Harry grinned wryly, knowing Severus didn't want to help 'out of the goodness of his heart' he just wanted to brew the potion. That was Slytherins for you though, and truthfully he didn't mind, he wanted to brew it himself.

"Why not just take the lap-thingy to the lab? Watch it while you brew?" Barty suggested, shrugging his shoulders. He'd been informed you couldn't just set the thing up to alert you when something is happening, so you did have to monitor it carefully. Considering what they wanted to do, of course, he wanted to monitor it.

Severus grimaced at the thought of having to listen to the Weasley's all afternoon in the lab. "I wouldn't mind if you did." he wanted to brew the potion more than he desired to complain about the Weasley's.

"Well, okay, we'll get started after breakfast," Harry said in agreement, he guessed spending time with Tom was out of the question then. They didn't get to spend much time together, which was understandable, with his projects and Voldemort trying to gain control over magical Britain.

"You went into a lot of trouble for that Longbottom boy, why do you intend to force them to move away from their home?" and Britain was their home, the Longbottoms had always been there.

Harry grimaced, "Neville is a good guy, loyal, should have been put in Hufflepuff I think he would have found his footing there in the beginning. He never really cared about my status as Boy-Who-Lived, and was…there for me in a period of my life where I was truly alone." Which was all true, "If anyone deserves one good turn, it's Neville. Plus, they would never be happy here, this is a chance to force change, to make them leave their comfort zone and have a happy life." home was where the heart was, and Longbottom manor definitely wasn't where Neville's heart was. After the abuse he'd suffered there – and they didn't even see it as abuse – he'd be quite bloody eager he'd bet to get away.

"And I'd rather not have the Longbottom's causing another rebellion," Voldemort added curtly, "So, it is a stipulation made by me, in order for their cure to be presented to them." admittedly he had thought Dumbledore would be out of the way by the time Harry figured it out. His partner continued to exceed his expectations, and surprise him, which surprised him since he shouldn't be surprised by anything he did anymore.

They were a couple, and they thought, plotted and planned together, despite everyone's belief. Admittedly it wouldn't change much if he was determined, but he had to give Harry his due, he certainly tried or came up with a better solution and argued his case.

"I doubt very much the grandmother will be in their good graces," Severus sneered, "That's if the boy actually reveals what it was like growing up with her." He didn't add dowager, she did not deserve that respect, despite being a formidable woman, he did not care for child abusers, and she was most definitely one. Neville Longbottom was…a mess, emotionally, they'd completely destroyed the boy as a youngster, which made him a target as a teen. Never once had he seen the boy fight back, eyeing Harry, abuse affected everyone differently, he knew from personal experience too.

Harry grimaced, "You've got that right," he admitted, "I certainly wouldn't want to be in the same room as Frank and Alice when they find out." Neville had deserved better, but the funny thing was Neville's grandmother absolutely loved her grandson, it was just conditional when it shouldn't be.

Everyone else barely – or didn't at all Voldemort definitely didn't care – refrained from rolling their eyes. They personally did not care about Frank or Alice Longbottom, or discussing them for that matter. They doubted very much Severus or Harry did either, but Harry was loyal enough to see that the Longbottom was happy at least.

Harry tangled his fingers with Tom's under the table, feeling rather daring in his sleep deprived state. Squeezing lightly, extremely happy despite his tiredness, and he didn't dare try anything else. He wanted to celebrate with him. "Do you have anything to do today?" Harry asked, staring at Tom, something in his gaze utterly blatant.

Voldemort arched a brow in amusement, throwing the others a look that suggested they make themselves scarce.

"I'll meet you in the lab," Severus said, suddenly finding himself eager to get out of the Grand Hall. Snatching Harry's Grimoire as he stood up.

"I'm going with you," Barty muttered abruptly, the others didn't even bother with excuses, just followed Barty and Severus hastily.

Voldemort's lips twitched, he still had the ability to scare the hell out of his followers despite his looks not being the same as they were used to. Although, they were probably used to his new looks now, it had been over a year now since they were used to seeing him in this way.

"Come here," Voldemort stated, tugging Harry closer, rolling his eyes at his slight hesitance in Harry's gaze. He was clearly still unsure of their relationship and what was allowed. He honestly wasn't sure how to deal with that, he wasn't used to lovers who were hesitant with him and what was allowed, they would have been all over him, flaunting their relationship as if it was somehow going to make it permanent and that they'd have a higher status than everyone else. which hadn't happened of course, he did not trust others that way, Harry had always been different from the get go. Not only had Harry gained something nobody else had, trust, respect and more importantly the position that had been so highly sought and desired.

Go figure he couldn't care less about it, which made him quite frankly the perfect candidate.

"You may act as you wish," Voldemort informed him, his gaze blazing with heat and amusement. "Definitely don't have an exhibitionist streak." He couldn't help but tease, he wanted to see him turn red, to blush furiously, it was so difficult to work Harry up any other way. Shifting a little to accommodate Harry, while he was tall – not as tall as him – and lithe he had gained a significant amount of weight -and height – since coming here.

Harry cocked his head to the side, face to face with Voldemort, "Do you?" truthfully that wouldn't surprise him the least. Voldemort got amusement out of scaring, shocking or scandalising his followers. It was his favourite thing, although he would protest and pretend that it wasn't. He definitely wouldn't be indulging in that with him if it was something he liked.

Voldemort smirked, "You'll find I'm much too possessive to possess much of an exhibitionist streak when it comes to you." He admitted, as amusing as it was, yes, to those he truly considered his own…he would feel too protective to allow his followers greedy gazes to take in the sight that belonged to him and he alone. The others he'd partnered with in the past, it had amused him to see them coming onto him or flinging themselves on him in order to 'rub their noses in it' that he or she was higher up. It also amused him with their subtle demands and how long they'd last before they realized they were gaining nothing from their partnership.

"Probably a good thing, I'm never going to fuck you in front of anyone else," Harry admitted, cheeks a little red but nonetheless entirely serious.

Voldemort chuckled, "True," he said wryly, a good thing indeed. He personally didn't think Harry would either, he put on a façade in front of most of the Death Eaters, and there were a group that he relaxed a little around enough to show his true self to. Those he trusted, Severus, Luna and Barty mostly. Not that he wanted to think about them when Harry was so blatantly interested in something else entirely. "As for your earlier question…I am free today," he didn't have any appointments that required his attention. And there was no mistaken his interest since Harry was pressed so intimately against him. And if he wasn't…well, he was Lord Voldemort, he could get away with changing appointments. Most of them desired to appease to him, not the other way around. If they knew what was good for them, they'd join him or he would ensure they lived to regret their refusal.

"Good," Harry said, pressing his lips against Tom's the taste of his coffee and breakfast prevalent as they locked lips, a shudder crawled up his spine, as fingers lightly eased under his clothes and drew a line up his back and neck before that had grasped his neck and proceeded to show him exactly how to kiss properly.

And in all things, Harry was a fast learner, and was expertly copying what Tom was showing him. Grinding against the hardness in his lap, his own echoing the reactions, pleasant shudders ran up his spine as arousal flooded his system. Everyone had commented on how good it was, but Harry hadn't really comprehended it, he'd just assumed it was expectation talking. How wrong he was. Not that he would have done this any earlier if he'd had the chance. He would have been nothing but a notch on their bedpost, and the entire affair probably sold to the daily prophet, the entire thought made him feel sick.

A guttered moan leaving his lips at the feel of Tom nibbling and biting down the pale expanse of his throat. Hand's grasped his hips, and guided him into swaying his hips a little, giving an extra zing to their passion. He did notice that Tom made no move to take the lead otherwise, or go father than he'd already declared himself to be. It made him feel rather smug and satisfied.

Voldemort huffed against Harry's skin, causing Goosebumps to spread at the feel of Harry's amusement through the bond. He could make an accurate guess as to what Harry was thinking right at this moment. If it had been anyone else, they would have been punished for the audacity of thinking he kowtowed to anyone. "Don't let that go to your head," he drawled against Harry's skin, enjoying the feeling of the shudders and Goosebumps that rose in turn.

Harry snorted in amusement, paying particular close attention to Tom's neck, trying his hardest to give him the biggest hickey he could. Out of sheer curiosity to see whether he would keep it there or hide it.

Biting his bottom lip afterwards, arching up and grinding down, as fire spread through his veins, Merlin help him, but Tom knew just how to touch him to make him react. If he continued to touch him like that…he wasn't going to last long at all.

He didn't. When Tom bit Harry's neck just at the side of pleasured pain, it was the end of Harry's restraint. With a muffled grunt, he came in his pants, his euphoria was interrupted by a secondary feeling of Tom coming through the bond much to his surprise.

Harry laughed breathlessly at Tom's muffled cursing at coming like a schoolboy in his pants after a short make out session. He blamed the bond that had allowed him to feel exactly what Harry had, it seemed during his moment of coitus lowered the barriers he had in his mind allowing him to feel everything.

"I am glad you're amused I haven't…" Voldemort stated trying and failing to sound annoyed only to be interrupted by a pop. Hissing in annoyance, he glared at the elf that had dared to interrupt them, his nostrils flaring, of course, it had to be Dobby, the one elf he couldn't punish, his partner seemed to have a somewhat alarming attachment to the elf. "This better be good," he warned the House-elf, his glare becoming fiercer if anything.

Dobby's eyes widened even more dramatically, but he didn't cower in the face of Voldemort's wrath. Secure in the knowledge that his Harry Potter would protect him from anything and everything.

"What is it Dobby?" Harry asked, craning his neck to look at him, cheeks flushed red but certainly not from embarrassment.

Harry ignored Tom's chuckle.

"Wheezy received a Floo call, Order meeting is at Wheezies tonight at seven," Dobby informed his Master of what he'd heard.

Harry chuckled, "Ironic, and perfect," nobody could resist Molly Weasley's cooking, which meant they'd all definitely consume something of hers, which meant the Order as of tonight…would be completely annihilated. It made something in him squirm uncomfortably, the twins and Arthur…he was genuinely fond of them.

"Indeed," Voldemort drawled, easing Harry off his lap, Harry remaining lower than the table so that Dobby didn't get an eyeful of his wet patch. He did not want to think on what Dobby would do if he saw it or what he'd think…no best not. He did not want his damn House-elf thinking he'd peed himself and trying to 'clean' the patch up.

"Bring it here, and tell Barty, the Lestrange's and Luna," Harry commanded, "Let Severus know as well, but tell him he can just continue with the potion if he likes." He could make it another time, he'd already accomplished what he set out to do, that was actually invent the potion.

"And Lucius," Voldemort added, who had been waiting for fifteen minutes outside of his office.

Dobby bowed then immediately left to do as Harry bid.

Two flicks of their wands had them cleaned up and straightened up.

Dobby reappeared just after laptop in hand, and passing it off to Harry and off again.

Harry angled the laptop better, putting the heavy weighing machine on the table. The volume was at full blast, allowing him to hear every word that was spoken. The view was angled at the kitchen, only a little partially obscured by the rest of her cloak in the way, but for most part they had all they needed.

Molly Weasley was already beginning the preparation stages for the meal. There were bags under her eyes, she was clearly stressed out, no doubt about Dumbledore.

"You summoned us, My Lord?" Lucius spoke without his usual smug tone. The others piled in behind him, all acting professional, ready to do what the Dark Lord asked of them.

"It's time," Harry stated, still staring at the screen in front of him.

"My Lord?" Lucius queried, unlike the others he had no idea what was going on or what was about to go down. It did not sit well with him at all, that he was so out of the game that he felt he was being side-lined. He could not let his dislike for Potter, or his agnostic ways allow him to end up lower in the ranks. He'd worked too damn hard to get to where he was to allow that. To allow Barty or the Lestrange's to take his place.

"I need someone to cause a disturbance but not big enough to alarm the Weasleys…" Harry called out, before anyone could explain everything to Lucius. "I don't want them moving the meeting place."

"Barty, bring Lucius up to date," Voldemort ordered, "What exactly do you have in mind?" his ideas would be big disturbances, its' what he did best. Barty's voice in the background begun explaining to Lucius what had been going on and he blocked it out, his mind mulling over potential disturbances, but all his were over the top.

"She needs to leave the room so we can put the stuff in, and hopefully she wont bloody eat it before it's done otherwise…" Harry trailed off, she'd be dead and they'd still be no closer to taking out the order.

"Daddy is still staying at Longbottom Manor," Luna said, "Something small, Daddy will be angry otherwise." Offering her home up for the 'disturbance.

"Fire alarm?"

"Very loud," Luna confirmed, it would be heard by the Weasley's and Molly Weasley was extremely nosy so she would investigate. "I'll go,"

"No way," Rodolphus stated firmly, he wasn't going to let her risk herself, they had no idea whether Dumbledore was keeping an eye out for her or what. She'd gone off the radar and dumbledore was far from stupid, he could have put it together, and told someone. Just because he was in Azkaban…it didn't mean they were completely cut off, they didn't know who Dumbledore had in his corner still. Better to be safe than sorry in his opinion. He didn't care what anyone else said.

Luna just gave him a look to say 'Who do you think you're ordering around' and that she'd make him regret it.

"How about I go with you?" Rodolphus amended his statement.

Barty barked an amused laughter, damn, hardened Rod afraid of itty bitty Luna Lovegood. He was so whipped, if this hadn't been an official meeting he would have definitely said something. He'd just need to remember this for later. He did share a smirk with Rabastan who was just as amused as Barty at his brothers actions.

"That would be lovely," Luna agreed, giving Rodolphus a beatific smile. "Now Molly will know that I wouldn't be home alone, Daddy is very protective," and that was no exaggeration, he hadn't wanted her to go but he realized she was growing up and he couldn't force her without losing her.

"Malfoy would look like your father from behind," Harry suggested, giving Malfoy a look of contemplation, round about the same length of hair, and definitely the same colour he continued his critical assessment. "She doesn't even need to see you properly, it's just enough to get her out the door for a few seconds and Dobby in." and the beauty was, nothing they have on the property would be set off by House-elves, they can come and go as they please, completely underestimated.

And it was going to be in their favour.

Lucius grimaced at the thought of looking anything like Xeno Lovegood, that man was a fool of the lowest order. An utter idiot that didn't seem to exist on this planet, he spent most of his time lost in his own mind. Yet he realized, if he did not begin pulling his weight he was risking everything, he had to go on this mission and participate more. Giving a firm nod, indicating that he agreed. "I'll do it."

Things were now moving at a brisk pace. Between eliminating the Order, Dumbledore's impending trial.

"Let's get to it," Luna stated, before wandering over to Harry and whispering into his ear.

Harry's eyes widened comically leaving everyone wondering what Luna had just said to him.

There we go! So what has Luna told him? Will Molly spoil their plans by eating something early causing the Order to panic but still be alive nonetheless? Will Neville and his grandmother come forward in revealing Dumbledore had attacked them along with Harry digging his already prepared grave? R&R please