Chapter 2: Zig

Yeah, by now I baisically just label all my chapters "qwerty" when I need a document name. It's a cool word, and really easy to type. Look at your keyboard and you'll see why.

"Darling, we need to know some things. We know that this is a hard time for you, but…"

"It's okay. I'm over that part. What do you need to know?"

"Well, since these people are smart enough to show us that your father is okay, they aren't doing this to hurt him. That means that they're doing it to hurt other people. We need to have a list of everyone who would hate you or the Psychonauts enough to do this. We'll also be talking to your mother, darling."

"Okay… Well, there's Bobby Zilch, Benny…"

"We're serious, darling."

"I lit both of them on fire a couple times. I think they hate me by now."

"Everyone does that sometime, darling. I'm sure they've forgotten my now."

"Well, there is this one guy… no."

"What, darling?"

"An old boyfriend. He was cheating on me with this one girl, Kelsey, so I broke up with him. We go to the same elementary school."

"So… he's a psychic?"

"Yeah. So are both of his parents."

"Interesting. Anyone else you can think of?"

"Not really. You've got down all the usual people who are behind this stuff, right?"

"Yes, darling. That's what Sasha and I were doing before you got here."

"So… What was Raz doing?"

At the sound of his name, Raz stopped staring off into space. "What?"

"What were you doing here?"

"I was, uh, just hanging out."

"Oh. Okay. Bye, guys. Oh, uh, Raz?"

"Yeah?"

"Redecorating isn't a sin. It's actually really fun. You might want to look at my room sometime. I'm with this girl who's kind of like me. Our room rocks."

"Oh… I guess I need to work on my guarding, too, huh?"

"Yep."

Lili turned around then, and left.

Raz followed her.

"So, uh, what's this other girl like?"

"Her name's Zig. That's what people call her anyway. Probably only the Psychonauts and her family know her real name. She's better at guarding than me, but I'm getting better. She's cool."

"You said she's like me. Does that mean she's gonna call me 'dork' and 'loser' every couple sentences?"

"No, you dork. She knows you're cool."

"Oh. So she knows about me?"

"Yep."

"What does she know about me?"

"She knows you saved a summer camp, kissed me twice, and made four people sane. I also told her how hot you are."

"Uh… What?"

"Oh, come on! You spent ten years as an acrobat! You have red hair! You're heckuv cute!"

"Oh, uh… You are too."

"I know. I've been thinking of cutting my hair soon though. Right above my shoulders."

"Oh. I like your pigtails. They look really cool."

"Yeah, but they're kind of a hassle to do. Sometimes I wish I could just brush my hair and be done with it."

"Oh. I guess that makes sense."

"Raz, are you going to agree with me no matter what I say?"

"Well, I know people who had long hair, then they cut it, and it still looked really good. I don't care about hair anyway. That's a girl thing."

"Yeah, I guess that's why you wear a helmet all the time."

"Did you… did you just say my hair sucks?"

"See? Hair is a guy thing. Here's my room."

It was amazing, Raz thought, that two people could talk about hair for half of the walk from one side of a government building to the next.

"I know. Isn't it fun? Get in here, loser!"

He heard a softer, slightly deeper voice from inside Lili's room. "Yeah, loser, get in here!"

He almost ran away. It was like two Lilies. He had just been called a loser by two people for the same reason.

"Hey, loser, get in here! I want to see if you're as hot as Lili says!"

He sighed, expecting the worst, and entered the room.

He was bombarded by black walls, rock star posters, and things that only girls would ever put together. One of those things was a little blown glass bottle, one of the ones used for perfume, on Lili's dresser. He couldn't tell if there was anything in it.

"Uh…"

"Lili, you said he's hot. How can you tell? Ooh! Have you seen him shirtless?"

"No, Zig, I have not seen him shirtless, but he is one heckuva kisser! And he saved both of us when part of Thorny Tower fell on us. He's a Psychonaut, too."

"Oh my god! Your boyfriend is a Psychonaut! But he's only ten!"

"Yep! Raz is the youngest Psychonaut in, like, ever."

"You suck. I don't even have a boyfriend. I think that Josh guy likes me, though."

"The weird one in your pyro class?"

"Yeah, the platinum blonde one."

Raz was getting really bored. "Uh, can I go now?"

"Sure. Don't get lost!"

"Later, dorkface!"

Raz left. The room was… well, it was creepy, and two Lilies was a creepy idea. He walked back across HQ, looking for Sasha's room. He knew the number because it was all posted on the directory. People didn't usually mess with the Psychonauts. He looked at the big map. Room 224. He went to the second floor of Psychonaut rooms, and had just about gone in a complete circle by the time he found 224.

Sasha's room was decorated in much the same way as his lab back at Whispering Rock: Geometrically. There was a constant stainless steel theme throughout the whole place, a couple of completed (or maybe unstarted) rubix cubes on his (cube-shaped) nightstand. Also some books on scientific formulas and stuff. The lighting was about the same as in Raz's own room, but it fit in this place. At first, it looked like the colors that there were were tacky and in bad taste, but the Raz remembered that Sasha was colorblind. That was one of the stories Milla had told him: the first time that Sasha had explored her mind, the sudden rush of colors had made him colorblind everywhere but in his own mind.

So, Raz went back to his own room. He did have some stuff that he'd brought from home for the weeks (and hopefully even years) that he'd expected to spend at Whispering Rock. He had a circus poster, (he didn't even know why) and he had… well, that was it. But at least it was something!

Now all he needed were thumbtacks.

Yeah, Zig is kind of a freak. And so is Lili. And frankly, I hate the pics of Lili with short hair, but other people like them, so I actually had her consider it. Short-haired Lili sucks about as much as Dart. Dart is the original main character, and he had one of those hats that looks like a really long sock. I think that's in some of the original art, too.

To Sun: Thanx 4 the fanmail!

To everyone who read Academy and was waiting because I said "I have big plans for Raz and Lili," you should read Sam x Linda. It's about what was really happening when Sasha was talking to Linda, and it's probably the only fanfic between Linda and Mr. Pokeylope on the whole site!