Chapter 1: The Dead Spectre
Shepard led her team to the ground of Eden Prime, and after taking a moment to orientate herself she drew her pistol. Alenko and Jenkins followed her lead drawing weapons of their own. Jenkins, she had learned, was from Eden Prime and she knew that his knowledge of the place could prove useful. Movement further down the slope caught her attention, before her heart had beat twice she had assessed the odd, floating creatures as being insentient and unlikely to be a treat. She picked up the pace, stopping to glance around the area before wading through the foot deep standing water that the 'gas bags' – as she just heard Jenkin's call them – were floating above. After a quick jot down the opposite side, just to make sure that there was nothing hiding around the corner; Shepard went up the narrow pass between rock formations and then put a fist in the air to halt her team. Her eyes scanned the area ahead, seeing nothing of concern she gave the go ahead. Almost immediately Jenkins was shot down, the laser pulses cutting right through his weak armor.
Shepard dove for cover, ordering Alenko to do the same. She didn't take the time to worry about Jenkins, or curse herself for not detecting the threat. Peeking out of cover to see mechanical drones of some sort flying through the air she activated an Overload and ordered Alenko to use a biotic Throw. The drones fell swiftly, and Shepard moved to check on Jenkins. He was dead. Nothing to do for him now, they'd take him back to the ship after they secured the beacon. Sorry kid. The two continued forward, not getting very far before more drones appeared. These were dealt with easy enough, the gas bags floating around the area were a bit distracting with bullets flying around but Shepard was more than skillful enough to avoid shooting the strange creatures. This time, that's me, by the way, you're welcome. You get a little better, a little more skilled every time. Maybe if I can make you good enough, you can make this all finally end.
Pushing forward, Shepard heard more gunfire just before spotting someone in white armor shooting at drones. Shepard picked up the speed as she rushed into the fray, shooting at the bipedal mechs that rounded the bend. They weren't like the mechs she was used to seeing. Not mechs, geth. They moved differently, too, more cautiously and taking cover. She'd never seen a mech take cover. Taking cover near the armored woman, Shepard didn't pause to speak, taking aim and firing on the mechs.
The mechs didn't go down quite as easily as the damn drones did, but they sure did make easier targets. Alenko gave the all clear and Shepard turned to look at the woman who'd left cover and put her gun away. Shepard got a closer look at her armor, the same incredibly ugly white armor with pink accents she'd seen in the video feed back on the Normandy. Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams aka Xenophobic Bitch. The woman snapped a salute as Shepard approached.
"Thanks for your help, Commander. I didn't think I was going to make it. Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams of the two twelve. You the one in charge here, ma'am?" Williams asked.
Shepard ignored the obvious and instead asked if the woman was injured. Williams assured Shepard that it was nothing serious before going into the details of the attack. She had lost her whole team to the attack and seemed a little shaken. Shepard was no stranger to losing her whole team, even if this was incomparable to Akuze. She was sure that Williams was feeling the loss so gave her a moment to work through it before she started asking questions.
"Any idea what kind of enemy we're facing?" Shepard finally asked.
"I think they're geth," Williams responded without hesitation.
"The geth haven't been seen outside of the Veil in nearly two-hundred years. Why are they here now?" Alenko spoke up.
Williams responded with a shrug, "They must have come for the beacon. The dig site is close, just over that rise. It might still be there."
"We could use your help, Williams," Shepard asked looking off in the direction Williams pointed.
"Aye, aye, ma'am. It's time for payback," the Gunnery Chief said.
"Move out," was Shepard's only response.
Shepard kept an eye on Williams as they moved towards the dig site. She was an unknown quantity and the parameters had already changed with this mission too many times for her comfort. Williams is a good soldier; you can trust her on the field. Nihlus was still checking in over the comm, but she hadn't caught sight of him since he left the ship and that was making her uneasy. Was he actually scouting ahead or was he up on a cliff somewhere watching her get shot at like some creepy stalker; there was no way for her to know and she had to stay focused. Moving down a trail off to the side, Shepard spotted what must be the dig site up ahead. She could see the metal structures set up around the area to protect the site and offer support for the digging. There are geth ahead. If the geth were here for the beacon, the site might be occupied. Staying low, Shepard moved her team from cover to cover behind the jagged pieces of rock that littered the area. Sure enough, there were geth patrolling the site and one of them caught sight of her team.
Ducking back down, Shepard inched her way to the edge of the rock she had her back to and peered around the corner; giving swift orders to Alenko to use his Sabotage while she lined up an Overload. She marked a target for Williams, not yet really knowing what the woman could do. It seemed the three of them worked rather well together and the geth went down much faster with the coordinated effort. Shepard creeped out from behind the rock, edging along the path staying near to cover until she was able to see into the dig site. Giving the all clear, she stood and looked around the area. She didn't see any type of beacon, turning at the waist she looked back at Williams with a raised eyebrow.
Williams stepped over and looked over the area, "This is the dig site. The beacon was right here. It must have been moved."
Shepard weighed the words and expression of the other woman, gauging her for any hint of deceit and found none. Williams suggested that they check out the research camp. Shepard couldn't find fault in the idea so gave the order to move out.
"Change of plans, Shepard. There's a small spaceport up ahead. I want to check it out. I'll wait for you there," Nihlus' voice came over the comm.
Shepard led her team up towards the ridge where Williams said the research camp was. Before they crested the ridge, the smell of smoke reached Shepard's nose. Soon, they saw flames consuming a prefab module, if there had been anyone in that building they were dead now. As they got closer to the area, Shepard saw something that gave even her pause. Metal spikes on a tripod formation jutted into the air. Impaled on each spike was what appeared to be burned human corpses but there was something else, blue lights coming from their skin… she couldn't quite make it out but she continued to move forward with caution. Dragon Teeth, and they aren't human. Not anymore. As the team approached, the spikes began to drop one by one. The bodies freed, began to move, climbing down from the tripod structures and zeroing in on Shepard and her team. Their movements seemed dazed, erratic – mindless.
Shepard fired a warning shot into the dirt near one of the… the… what the hell were these things? Husks. It only seemed to encourage the not-human monster as it locked on and ran straight at her. She fired more shots, but it just kept running like the damn thing couldn't even feel the bullets ripping through its flesh. Get back, don't let it close on you! Shepard moved back, keeping her gun trained on the creature, firing shot after shot until it finally fell. They were making the most unnerving noise she had ever heard, it made her skin crawl. Wait 'til you hear the siren of a Reaper, or worse, a Banshee's scream. Shepard shuddered as she turned to shoot at one of the creatures that had jumped onto Alenko, its knees locked onto his hips and its hands on his shoulders. She saw it move its head down towards Alenko's face; it almost looked like it was trying to bite the man. Her pistol rang out twice before the creature fell to the ground dead. She turned in time to see one close on Williams. Shepard shot at the creature. It stopped a few feet from Williams and threw its head back, arms out wide. It made that terrible sound, almost like a wailing roar and something like blue electricity began to arc over its body. Williams was knocked back from the small explosion, and the creature seemed to liquefy falling to a puddle on the ground. Williams confirmed that her shields were down, but the threat was over, for now.
Shepard moved to the body of the first one. Looking at it, there was no doubt that this thing was once human. She didn't know what had been done to it, but she felt no guilt for killing it. She was certain it had stopped being human, or even alive as far as she was concerned, long before she shot it down.
"I saw the geth putting people on these spikes, they were just people! What the hell did they do to them?" Williams asked the disgust evident in her tone.
"I don't know, but we have to keep moving. Nihlus is waiting for us at the spaceport. Let's check these buildings for survivors and then get to Nihlus," Shepard said.
"Aye, aye, ma'am," came Williams' voice.
"Yes, Commander," was Alenko's reply.
The first building she went to was empty except for some lockers and cots. Moving to the second door, she found the door locked. Opening her omni-tool she held her hand out towards the lock and began the bypass. Once the door was opened she peered inside, spotting two survivors cowering at the far side of the room. They appeared unharmed, but terrified. Shepard put her pistol away, hoping not to alarm them further before stepping into the prefab room. Realizing that Shepard was human, the two survivors moved towards her.
"Humans, thank the Maker!" The woman said, wringing her hands.
"Hurry! Close the door! Before they come back!" the man spoke in a rushed, whispering voice.
Something seemed off with him.
"Don't worry, we'll protect you," Shepard said trying to keep him calm and reassure them both.
"Thank you, I think we'll be okay now. It looks like everyone's gone," the woman said.
"You're Dr. Warren, the one in charge of the excavation. Do you know what happened to the beacon?" Williams asked the woman.
"It was moved to the spaceport this morning. Manuel and I stayed behind to help pack up the camp," she said indicating the man standing hunched over next to her.
Shepard eyed the man warily; something was really not right with him. He's gone mad. Indoctrinated maybe or maybe the beacon showed him something. Last time you shot him like a rabid dog.
"When the attack came, the marines held them off long enough for us to hide. They gave their lives to save us," Dr. Warren continued.
"No one is saved. The age of humanity is ended. Soon, only ruin and corpses will remain," Manuel rambled.
Shepard paused only a moment, thinking it best to ignore the man for now and focus on what information she could get out of the clearly more stable woman.
"What else can you tell me about the attack?" Shepard asked.
"It all happened so fast. One second we were gathering up our equipment, the next we were hiding in the shed while the geth swarmed over the camp," the doctor said, shaking her head in confusion.
"Agents of the destroyers. Bringers of darkness. Heralds of our extinction," Manuel said.
Manuel pushed at his head with a fist. Dr. Warren continued on without comment to Manuel's bizarre statements so Shepard left it alone for now, keeping an eye on the man.
"We could hear the battle outside. Gunfire. Screams. I thought it would never end. Then, everything went quiet. We just sat there, too afraid to move. Until you came along," Dr. Warren said.
"Can you tell me anything about the beacon?" Shepard asked.
"It's some type of data module from a galaxy wide communications network. Remarkably well preserved. It could be the greatest scientific discovery of our lifetime! Miraculous new technologies, groundbreaking medical advancements. Who knows what secrets are locked inside?" Dr. Warren said.
"We have unearthed the heart of evil. Awakened the beast. Unleashed the darkness," Manuel spoke sounding increasingly agitated.
Shepard casually rested her hand on the butt of her pistol; this man was making her seriously uncomfortable. What the hell was he on about? Noting the Commander's movements, and perhaps fearing what they might mean for her colleague if she couldn't calm him down Dr. Warren tried to quiet Manuel.
"Manuel! Please! This isn't the time," she said.
Shepard really wanted to move this along but she needed to ask about Nihlus, something about the turian still wasn't sitting right with her, "Did you notice a turian in the area?"
"I saw him. The prophet. Leader of the enemy. He was here, before the attack," Manuel responded.
Alenko spoke up, "That's impossible. Nihlus was with us on the Normandy before the attack. He couldn't have been here."
"I'm sorry. Manuel's still a bit… unsettled. We haven't seen your turian. We've been hiding here since the attack," Dr. Warren said.
Finally, Shepard had had enough of the mad man's ramblings, "What's wrong with your assistant?"
"Manuel has a brilliant mind but he's always been a bit… unstable. Genius and madness are two sides of the same coin," Dr. Warren tried to explain.
"Is it madness to see the future? To see the destruction rushing towards us? To understand there is no escape? No hope? No, I am not mad. I'm the only sane one left!" Manuel's voice became more fevered, rising in pitch.
"I gave him an extra dose of his meds after the attack," said Dr. Warren, clearly trying to reassure the uneasy Commander.
Shepard seriously contemplated shooting the man for a moment, he had completely lost it and she feared he might become violent with Dr. Warren when they left. Still, the woman seemed use to his insanity and seemed to know how to control him, or at least keep him on a short leash. Perhaps he can keep it together long enough for evac.
"Williams, take us to the spaceport," Shepard said turning to the Gunnery Chief.
"You can't stop it. Nobody can stop it. Night is falling. The darkness of eternity," Manuel seemed to almost whine.
"Hush, Manuel. Go lie down. You'll feel better once the medication kicks in," Dr. Warren ordered.
Leaving the insane man and his caretaker behind, Shepard stepped back outside and let a low whistle escape her lips. She shared a meaningful look with Alenko and Williams; both seemed just as on edge over the man's behavior as she was.
"Any idea what the hell that man was talking about?" Shepard asked her team.
"It sounded like he is expecting some sort of apocalypse. I mean, I get it, whatever those damn things are running around, the geth, and that ship falling down on the place! Honestly, if it weren't for my training, I think I might be just as far gone as he is after seeing that thing. And that noise it made. I think that noise could mess anyone's brain up," Williams said clearly still processing the attack herself.
"I'm more curious to know what turian he was talking about. I mean, yeah, sure, the man is obviously insane but what if he really did see another turian? We know it couldn't have been Nihlus, but it sounded like he really did see someone and whoever that was might be responsible for whatever is going on here," Alenko added.
"I don't like this," Shepard said drawing her pistol once more and keeping it pointed at the ground. "Let's get to that spaceport, get that beacon and get back to the Normandy. Anderson needs to know about all of this ASAP."
They'd only taken a few steps when they heard a gunshot ring out from the direction of the spaceport. Shepard picked up speed, breaking into a run with Alenko and Williams following her lead. They rounded a corner and saw the spaceport just down the rise, geth started shooting at them as soon as they were in view and more of those… husks, yes, she decided that's what they were. Empty shells, no longer human. More of those husks dropped down from their spikes and started running up the hill towards her team. In front of them sat another prefab and several large rocks. Shepard quickly dove for cover, taking out the husks first since they were far more aggressive than the geth and closing distance fast. She ordered Williams to use the Overkill technique she'd seen her use earlier and gave Alenko the go ahead for Throw, switching between her biotics, tech, and pistol herself. After the husks were down, they turned their attention to the geth taking them out with speed and efficiency.
The spaceport was right there, but she couldn't overlook the prefab standing in front of her. Yeah, Anderson had said that survivors were secondary but Nihlus was a Spectre, surely he was able to handle himself long enough for her to secure that building. She jogged over to the prefab and began to bypass the door when it opened and a woman and two men stepped outside. Shepard didn't spare much time talking to them, just assured them that it was clear and that they were safe where they were for now.
Just as she was about to go, the two men started bickering about whether or not to give her something. This caught Shepard's attention so she prodded the man the others called Cole, turns out they'd been moving packages for smugglers and when the attack happened they decided to look in the packages. They'd found a pistol, and after Shepard reminded them that her team was risking their lives to save the colony, Cole offered up a combat scanner as well. He didn't want to reveal the name of his contact when Williams asked, insisting he wasn't a bad guy. Shepard didn't want to push the issue; she had far more important things to worry about.
Running down the hill, she quickly scouted the area to make sure that there was no ambush waiting. Given the all clear, her team made their way up a small set of stairs. Nihlus lay at the top, in a pool of his own blue blood. He had been shot in the back.
"Damn it!" Shepard swore.
Movement from behind some nearby crates drew their attention away from the dead Spectre. Guns raised, they ordered whoever it was to come out. A man showed himself, his hands rose to show he was unarmed. Shepard told him he could have gotten himself shot, sneaking around like that. The man apologized and explained that he had been hiding behind the crates when the attacks happened. Apparently, he frequently hid back there to sleep on the job and just got lucky this time. He said he saw everything that had happened though, including what had happened to Nihlus.
"The other one got here first. He was waiting when your friend showed up. He called him Saren. I think they knew each other," the man named Powell said; scratching his head. "Your friend seemed to relax. He let his guard down… and Saren killed him. Shot him right in the back. I'm just lucky he didn't see me behind the crates."
"Where did Saren go after he killed Nihlus?" Shepard asked.
"He jumped on that cargo train and headed over to the other platform. Probably going after the beacon," he said pointing to the cargo train. "I knew that beacon was trouble. Everything's gone to hell since we found it. First that damn mother ship showed up. Then the attack. They killed everyone. Everyone! If I hadn't been behind the crates I'd be dead, too!"
Shepard sent the man on his way, telling him where the other survivors were located so he could join up with them to wait for evac. She turned to head to the cargo train when they were set upon by more geth. Already understanding their tactics and weaknesses, Shepard moved into cover. The geth were down in less than two minutes, even the larger ones with rocket launchers. You're welcome. She rushed her team to the train and they took it across to the other platform. The combat scanner Cole had given her alerted her to the presence of several enemies in the area, and as soon as they stepped off of the train they saw a bomb right next to the train dock.
Immediately, Shepard bent down and scanned the bomb, her omni-tool informed her that there were four bombs in the area and that they had five minutes until detonation. Working fast and trusting her team to cover her back she disabled the first bomb. Shepard rushed through the area, dodging geth when she could, shooting them down when she couldn't. Her focus was finding the bombs and disabling them as quickly as she could. Williams and Alenko would have to deal with the geth. She went straight to the next bomb, not questioning how she knew that was where it would be. She crouched down low to disable the bomb while shots were being fired around her. Alenko and Williams kept the geth back, and she was in a recessed area so she was provided some cover.
As soon as that one was disarmed, she rose and charged, swerving past a geth before turning to fling an Overload at it as she went. Alenko and Williams weren't far behind her and soon the geth in that area were preoccupied by her team. She saw two geth blocking the recess where she knew the next bomb would be, so she ducked down behind a support beam and fired off a few shots. As soon as those geth were down she charged for the recess, again relying on the small space to provide her some modicum of cover as her team dealt with the enemy. With the third bomb disarmed she began to move out of the recess only to have to dive back behind it, there were several geth close and closing on her location. Quickly she used an Overload on them while having Alenko use his Throw to knock them back out of her way. Once they were down from the Throw, she charged past them even as they were regaining there footing.
She ducked behind a crate and took a sniper shot to her back. Quickly she hit her omni-tool, causing Medi-gel to be released into her suit before diving back out from behind the crate and over to the final bomb. She spared a second to order her team to her location before crouching down next to the bomb. Glancing at the countdown just before it was finished; she had accomplished disarming all the bombs in one minute and twenty seconds. Don't get smug, the first several times you did this you were stumbling around getting shot and searching in a near panic all over the place for the last bomb, nearly got yourself, your team, hell the whole damn colony blown up. There was only seconds to spare.
Heading down a ramp, she could see what must be the beacon. It was green, glowing pillar of sorts. Checking her scanner she picked up hostiles in the area so she put her back to a metal sheet along the ramps railing and looked around the corner. More geth and husks, though just a handful. They had them down quick. Shepard moved down off the ramp and after securing the area approached the prothean beacon. No, don't! Stay away from it, get back. Get back. Get back. Just don't, leave it the fuck alone. Leave it and maybe this shit will end. She didn't get too close to it, whatever it was it made her feel uneasy. She stepped back away and radioed the Normandy with their location for a pick up. Williams came over and started to talk to her but she saw Alenko getting closer to the beacon. She was just about to call out to him to tell him to keep his distance until they knew what exactly that thing was when the beacon started glowing brighter. Alenko seemed to be struggling, as if something was pulling him towards the beacon. Shepard shoved Williams out of the way and ran towards Alenko, grabbing the man and flinging him away from the beacon. It saved him, but now whatever it was had her. She could feel herself being pulled towards the device and lifted off of her feet.
She heard Alenko call out to her just before her head suddenly felt like it might explode. Images started pouring into her brain of death and destruction. Red hued pictures, as if viewed through blood smeared eyes, flashed before her too rapidly to follow closely. There was some kind of aliens, something she had never seen before being slaughtered in genocide by some sort of synthetics. Images of computer chips and other tech being implanted into flesh. It was too much, her mind couldn't handle it; she felt herself being violently thrown back and when she hit the ground she was out.
Damn it…
Shepard could hear movement as consciousness slowly crept back to her, she blinked her eyes and everything appeared fuzzy. She let her eyes drop closed again for a second and started shifting her weight to sit up. She blinked a few more times and her vision cleared as she set up.
"Doctor? Dr. Chakwas? I think she's waking up," She heard Alenko say.
Shepard pushed herself to the edge of the bed, letting her legs dangle down over the side and put her face in her palms, her elbows resting on her knees. Looking around she realized she was back on the Normandy and in the med bay. Dr. Chakwas walked around the bed to stand in front of Shepard.
"You had us worried there, Shepard. How are you feeling?" The doctor asked while watching Shepard closely.
"Like the morning after shore leave. How long was I out?" Shepard groaned, in between rubbing her temple and pinching the bridge of her nose.
"About fifteen hours. Something happened down there with the beacon, I think," Dr. Chakwas said.
Alenko jumped in quick, "It's my fault. I must have triggered some kind of energy field when I approached it. You had to push me out of the way."
When I'm a man, it's always Ashley that triggers the beacon. She always says pretty much the same thing when I wake up.
"You had no way to know that would happen," Shepard said shaking her head slowly at Alenko's words.
"Actually, we don't even know if that's what set it off. Unfortunately, we'll never get the chance to find out," the doctor said.
"The beacon exploded. A system overload, maybe. The blast knocked you cold. Williams and I had to carry you back here to the ship," Alenko said walking around to stand next to Dr. Chakwas.
"I appreciate it," she said to Alenko.
"Physically, you're fine. But I detected some unusual brain activity, abnormal beta waves. I also noticed an increase in your rapid eye movement, signs typically associated with intense dreaming," Dr. Chakwas paused, watching Shepard.
"I saw… I'm not sure what I saw. Death. Destruction. Nothing's really clear," Shepard said haltingly.
"Hmmm. I better add this to my report. It may – Oh, Captain Anderson," Dr. Chakwas said as Captain Anderson entered the med bay.
Shepard stopped paying close attention to the conversation as Anderson was filled in on her condition by the doctor. It was only after Dr. Chakwas and Alenko left the med bay that Shepard realized Anderson had asked to speak to her privately. She still wasn't feeling too steady on her feet, and her head was pounding. They talked for a few minutes about the deaths of Nihlus and Jenkins and of Williams joining the crew before Shepard finally brought up the thing they were both dancing around.
"Intel dropped the ball, sir. We had no idea what we were walking into down there. That's why things went to hell," Shepard was seething but did her best to reign it in, she knew it wasn't Anderson's fault.
"The geth haven't been outside the Veil in two centuries, Commander. Nobody could have predicted this," Anderson said.
She knew he was right, but goddamn it she was pissed and she needed someone to blame for this mission going to shit.
"I won't lie to you, Shepard. Things look bad. Nihlus is dead. The beacon was destroyed and geth are invading. The Council's going to want answers," Anderson laid out the facts to Shepard.
"I didn't do anything wrong, Captain. Hopefully, the Council can see that," Shepard said.
"I'll stand by you and your report, Shepard. You're a damned hero in my books. That's not why I'm here. It's Saren, that other turian. Saren's a Spectre, one of the best. A living legend. But if he's working with the geth, it means he's gone rogue. A rogue Spectre's trouble. Saren's dangerous, and he hates humans," Anderson said, furrowing his brow.
"Why?" she asked.
"He thinks we're growing too fast, taking over the galaxy. A lot of aliens think that way. Most of them don't do anything about it. But Saren has allied himself with the geth. I don't know how. I don't know why. I only know it had something to do with that beacon. You were there just before the beacon self-destructed. Did you see anything? Any clue that might tell us what Saren was after?" Anderson went on.
Shepard leaned back against the bed, "Just before I lost consciousness, I had some kind of vision."
"A vision? A vision of what?" He sounded skeptical as he paced a couple of steps before turning back to look at Shepard.
"I saw synthetics. Geth maybe," Shepard shrugged. "Slaughtering people. Butchering them."
"We need to report this to the Council, Shepard," Anderson said.
Shepard scoffed, "What are we going to tell them? I had a bad dream?"
"We don't know what information was stored in that beacon. Lost prothean technology? Blueprints for some ancient weapon of mass destruction? Whatever it was, Saren took it. But I know Saren. I know his reputation, his politics. He believes humans are a blight on the galaxy. This attack was an act of war! He has the secrets from the beacon. He has an army of geth at his command. And he won't stop until he's wiped humanity from the face of the galaxy!" Anderson lectured.
"I'll find some way to take him down," Shepard said looking at the floor between herself and Anderson and feeling for all her efforts she had disappointed the man.
"It's not that easy. He's a Spectre. He can go anywhere, do almost anything. That's why we need the Council on our side," Anderson explained.
"We prove Saren's gone rogue and the Council will revoke his Spectre status," Shepard suggested, making herself sound far more confident than she felt.
"I'll contact the ambassador and see if he can get us an audience with the Council. He'll want to see us as soon as we reach the Citadel. We should be getting close. Head up to the bridge and tell Joker to bring us in to dock," Anderson ordered before turning and leaving the med bay.
With Anderson gone, Shepard stood alone in the med bay for a few minutes pulling herself together. She turned towards the bed and laid her palms out on the firm mattress, leaning forward she stared at the pristine white sheet rumbled from where she'd been. Shepard let her mind wander. They're not going to believe you, no matter what you say. It won't be easy, but you'll find the evidence they need. You'll take him down, I always do. Pull it together; I can feel you falling apart inside. Stop it, goddamn it, Shepard. Stop it. You're stronger than this. I AM STRONGER THAN THIS. I will figure out a way to make this stop, I swear. Oh gods, why can't you hear me? This would all be over with by now if you could just hear me! Shepard looked up and around the room; she could have sworn she just heard someone say her name. The room was empty though. She knew that she wouldn't have been able to hear anyone talking outside the room unless they were screaming or talking on the intercom. She looked out the window at the mess area. Everything was calm out there. She shook her head – which she instantly regretted, chalking it up to being spooked over the beacon.
Shepard ran a finger across the scar on her cheek beneath her right eye. She took a deep breath and then let it rush out of her, strands of her hair being blown about as she did. She pushed herself away from the bed and left the med bay. As soon as she was in the mess hall, Alenko approached her telling her how glad he was to see that she was okay. She talked with him for a moment about everything that was happening, and the loss of Jenkins. She explained that Anderson wanted to have her speak with the Council when he asked why they were headed to the Citadel. He seemed like a really nice guy, she thought. No! No, no, no. Just don't. Don't even go there. Please. She glanced over her shoulder and saw Williams standing nearby. She excused herself from Alenko and approached Williams. She spent a minute or two assuring Williams that she was glad to have her aboard and that she had been a big help on Eden Prime before heading to the cockpit.